WELL HERES MY POKEMON GO STORY
>go outside for the first time in fucking ages
>hot as fuck, nearly 90 degrees outside
>decide to go to the park because items and stuff
>get there and touch item thing
>sit there rubbing my phone like a fucking idiot for 5 minutes
>i'm sorry please try again later
>since i'm out i guess i'll use my incense
>get a rattata immediately but nothing for another 15 minutes
>phone starts to over heat because you have to leave the screen on or it won't work
>or you can pay 35 fucking dollars for it to work in the background LOL
>find a beedrill and throw like 20 pokeballs at it but it keeps braking out
>finally get one that looks like it's going to catch it
>the game freezes
>just sit there for awhile looking around hoping it will work eventually
>police officer comes up to me and asks me what i'm doing
>someone called the cops because of a suspicious white male alone at the park
>j-just trying to catch pokemon officer
>later walking back and check phone again
>by now i'm sweaty as fuck and stink even though i used my moms deodorant (dont h8)
>SOME TEENAGERS RIDE UP NEXT TO ME AND START MAKING FUN OF MY WEIGHT ONE OF THEM SMACKS MY PHONE TO THE GROUND AND NOW IT HAS BIG CRACK IN IT BECAUSE I HAD TO TAKE IT'S CASE OFF TO COOL I
>at least i get GBP for going outside
>battery dies because game is a resource hog
>miss mom's call so i don't even get to tell her i want chicken tenders for din din SMH
THINGS I LEARNED TODAY
>Phone games
Not Even Once
>going out side
Not. Even. Fucking. Once
WELL HERES MY POKEMON GO STORY
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OP is a fag
>0/10 copypasta
>chicken tenders
>not chicken tendies
Nigga you better step your game up before you pasta this again
Met a couple dozen people last night at a park, that's about it. A total of like 100 people in the last 3 days.
whats you being part of a peadophile ring got to do with pokemon go?
a happy side effect
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8/10
I went outside and literally saw 15 people playing the first night it came out.
hope to see some of you neckbeards out there more often.
>hot as fuck
>nearly 90
I've been out all day in pants and longsleeves and it's about 105
Pussy
Bullshit pokemon don't break out yet
Battle of the neckbeards
Easy to block the sun with your fedora, huh?
i just pissed myself laughing holy fuck
Rekt
>windows phone fag here
too poor to buy an iphone or decent android
too poor to catch em all
why even live
>I've been out all day in pants and longsleeves and it's about 105
>Pussy
My story is less interesting.
>Live in the middle of butt fuck nowhere Alabama.
>Catch nothing but Pidgeys and Rattatas when at home.
>Check phone to see a Pinsir nearby.
>Throw on some pants and step out of my mom's basement and into the horrid light of day.
> Go back in to grab my fedora to shield my eyes.
> Walk along the side of the road through some thorny vines.
>Realize I'm not getting closer, turn to go back the other way.
>Catch a random Eevee.
>Keep walking.
>Pinsir drops down to two foot prints.
>Little avatar just standing still, and nothing responds.
>App fucking freezes up.
>Restart to find nothing around but a damn Pidgey.
>As I'm heading back inside, notice a Pikachu pop up nearby.
> Keep treking to find it.
>Fucking servers down.
Fuck this, and fuck rural Alabama.
are there a lot of black people in alabama
Look on the bright side
lesser chance of you getting hit by a car
Pokemon GO has actually made me go outside and socialize. I've actually gone walking a decent amount over the past couple days (whereas I hadn't left my house for months before) and I've met some chill people that I'm planning to meet up with soon. Feels good man.
proud of u user,
What's your height weight and age?
19, around 6 foot, ~190 lbs
i'm not too overweight imo, but not healthy. got a bit of noticeable chub to burn off.
sick bro, get that neckbeard off and fuk some sluts
yo thanks Sup Forumsro
fuck you. its 101 out here with a real feel of like fucking 108 florida is a hell hole.
Be sure to thank Ingress(niantics love child) for bringing Pokemon go to life.
my story is fun.
>go out side
>been jogging lately and for the last month
>no ones out side in the neighborhood.
>see children out side on there phones.
>see my gym(that is on top of my house) taken over.
>grab my highest level 1217 snorlax and ruin them take over the gym.
>hear one of them scream
>how the fuck did some one get that?
>jog over to them.
>my dog growls at them
>I laugh
>Which one of you little bitches tried to take over my god danm gym.
>run off crying.
>father (whos a friend of mine) comes over later for beers.
>he tells me they came home saying i was mean to them and he laughed at them
>he looks at me.
>how the fuck did you get that high of a snorlax????
You deserved it by being such a beta faggot. You should beat this stupid kid up. Fucking faggot.
I saw 2 snorlaxes(nearby thing) on launch day. Servers were screwed so I couldn't get them to appear. I assumed they were just common in my area so I didn't bother looking for them at the time.
Haven't seen any since. Fml
wasted
Did the latest of her leaks ever come out?
Niiiice
i bought a brand new android samsung galaxy and it turns out it doesnt even hav a gyroscope, so i cant even see the fckng pokemon. imagine how i feel
sounds kinda like my experience last night.
>was walking around at midnight trying to get a water pokemon next to the LA river, since its the only water source anywhere nearby.
>realize that the hotspot for krabby is a korean market
>fucking chinks hording all the crabs
>so i go to the parking lot of closed korean market
>shady ass skinhead dudes in van are sitting in the middle of parking lot
>look at me intently
>i hide my phone so i dont look like complete faggot
>keep walking by like everythings normal
>never got my krabby
>mfw skinheads were guarding the only water pokemon source in town
this game will wreck your phone from the heat it makes it generate and it will destroy your battery very fast. i have it it took 3 days and many installs until i could log in via my Pokémon trainer club account and now because of the above mentioned issues i wish i hadn't. i can't even battle in a gym yet
Sent from my Android phone
must not be a new one..
next time, dont cheap out you jew
I got the game at work and so far I have like 8 Pokémon just sitting here at my desk and going to take a piss occasionally. The fountain outside just so happens to be a pokestop.
its the new samsung j3 galaxy. they just came out in january. its a decent enough phone, just no gyroscope T.T
Should've bought an older flagship. That phone has awful specs for today.
lol walk
i drove around for hours last night, up to 85 pokemon
I have a j5 and it has a gyroscope
It cost like 50€ more than the j3 and is 2,63 times better
You shouldn't have jewed
I downloaded the app but it just crashes on the loading screen
keked
if i worked for google or tesla i would integrate pokemon go into self driving cars and laugh at the chaos it would cause
>not playing ingress instead
you chose poorly, user
Gbp, good boy points?
Are you the faggot who bought a leather jacket?
Yes they do.
Lmao grow up. Fucking loser
what part? I live in Cocoa beach
Samsung Galaxy Jew3? The phone literally has Jew in the name. Why would you ever considered it?
post made me wanna play some more... Servers are down again. Yay.
Don't have a Poke KKKlub account. Have to wait because "with the exciting launch of Pokémon GO, there’s an overwhelming demand for new Pokémon Trainer Club accounts."
Fucking bullshit
Pokemon Go
Not even once
Pokemon helps you meet new people and stay in shape.
The fuck.
Guess you could say the pedophile's "gotta catch em all"
where the fuck is it 50 dollars more? all the stores around here are charging 500-900 dollars for all galaxies. this is the only affordable model
The fuck is that? I bought my J5 150€ (180€ without the sale) where do you live?
los angeles
Well they are a lot cheaper in paris
500-600 is for the s7
>tfw
the j5 has a better camera. thats about it. j5 even has a slightly weaker cpu than the j3. theres really not much difference between the 2 other than gyroscope
hello cocoa i live in titusville no go tho.
I've been working metal roofs 109 no breaks hardly get a chance to grab a bottle of water. Faggot grow a pair
who cares
Not his parents, that's for sure. That's why he has such a shit job.
op
>fat
>playing pokemon
>never goes outside
>lives with mom and uses her deoderant
nice man
cant you log in with google niggernon?
I don't understand why people love this game so much it's just going to cause a lot of car wrecks
>gbp
>"tenders"
>ya fukt up m8
Have you ever seen Crash? Not the Oscar-winning one, the one about getting in car accidents while having sex and masturbating.
wow, this game actually managed to get all the basement dwelling autists outside. I guess now everyone else should be worried about their safety
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how do you meet people while pokemoning? I'm scared of people noticing im out looking for pokemon (26 and live in nice townhouses) except for my neighbor with the nice ass bmw and p0k3m0n license plate
0/100 Copypasta
So lame
dude south fort myers is shit ass tier pokemonning
Just got it up and running on my Redmi 1S.
The AR mode lags so hard it's barely usable.
You must be new here...
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you can click the AR button in the top right so you dont have to use your camera to catch em
>sounds kinda like my experience last night.
>>was walking around at midnight trying to get a water pokemon next to the LA river, since its the only water source anywhere nearby.
>>realize that the hotspot for krabby is a korean market
>>fucking chinks hording all the crabs
>>so i go to the parking lot of closed korean market
>>shady ass skinhead dudes in van are sitting in the middle of parking lot
>>look at me intently
>>i hide my phone so i dont look like complete faggot
>>keep walking by like everythings normal
>>never got my krabby
>>mfw skinheads were guarding the only water pokemon source in town
wow you're bigot, he was probably just there to catch a krabby too, ya racist.
I played the shit out of that for like 2 months. There were only maybe another 4 or 5 people near me that played it. I would capture all the main areas and like a week later 1 or 2 of them got taken back over. It was too easy to rule the area and I looked like a giant faggot playing it.
Oh, also, that was a good cover for leaving so I could go pick up more heroin. I did a lot of heroin while playing that. I put myself in rehab to quit using heroin, though. Been clean for a while. I haven't played that fucking game since, either.
I'm actually fucked, in hospital now walked 63.8km in a couple hours trying to find fucking Pokemon. My knee is compleatly fucked, I had surgery on it a couple years ago and now I have ducking ruined it, I can barley walk and had to call a cab to pick me up and take me to the hospital.
Got some nice photos though
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>moved to new town outside of seattle within the last month.
>been riding my bike through a park near my apartment, full of baseball fields, playground, trails, etc. usually do a circuit around the whole park then make my way home. usually a 1.5-2 mile ride, usually home in under 15-25 minutes depending where I go.
>see the news article where a girl finds a body using pokemon go.
>install that shit.
>put phone on already-purchased phone dock on my bike's handlebars.
>ride towards park.
>wtf its full of 'pokestops', like 8 of them. hit them all, they keep refreshing, keep zig zagging around the park on my bike, heading towards tall grass, can't find any pokemon.
>pokestop near the skate park area of the park, head there.
>vaping guy comes up to me, HEY YOU PLAYING POKEMON GO TOO?
>yes.
>get some tips, advice, i had only starting pokemon, he had like 10+. thanks guy.
>keep going around park. run into a lady pushing a stroller and walking a dog and a toddler. lady is on her phone, kid is on a phone, they're playing pokemon go TOO. ask if they've caught anything cool, kid starts rambling, mother starts laughing and shows me her pikachu.
>keep going. still can't find pokemon. keep hitting pokestops scattered around the park.
>a pokemon appears, its actually on one of the baseball fields where two adult teams are currently playing baseball.
>try to get close to fence without being awkward
>still too far. fug.
>keep circling/zig zagging the park.
>it starts to rain.
>head home
>check cycling gps app. rode 12 miles, spent over 2 hours on my bike at the park.
INCREASED CYCLING WORKOUT/OUTDOOR TIME BY A MULTIPLE OF FOUR. RODE FURTHER THAN I HAVE SINCE I WAS A KID. DIDNT CATCH SHIT.
>Went to trader joes later that day, found 10 pokemon in the parking lot and 2 more inside by the 'trade joes totem pole' pokestop.
guess the old meme is true: you encounter less wild pokemon in the grass while riding the bike.
kek
Shits not funny nigga, I'm in so much pain
Why the fuck did you walk 30+ miles?
You are either an utter faggot or deprived of your libido from jerking to a screen if you are not completely convinced that it is pathetic for a grown man to play something like Pokemon GO. I don't give a shit if it's fun, so is meth. I don't give a shit if it's giving people a reason to go out, if you need a fucking app to leave your house, you deserve to become a socially retarded, screen dependant NEET.
If you'd sooner play Pokemon GO than read philosophy, learn a language or instrument, or improve yourself in some other way, I genuinely believe you are a degenerate. Did Alexander the Great, Napoleon Bonaparte, or Julius Caesar indulge in such degenerate activity? How are you going to explain yourself on the Day of Judgment when you are bid to account for how you spent your time?
Don't tell me that people have the right to spend their time as they please. No, degenerates are subject to have their time allocated for then since they proved themselves incapable of living as they ought to. Abstain from degeneracy brothers and strive for your potential as men, creations of almighty God. Surely we were not created to play Pokemon GO.
You don't need a brain like mine to abstain from triviality and you barely need a fucking brain at all to realize there are better things that a grown man can do than play Pokemon. It is the veritable Devil that bids a man to have fun instead of spend his precious time bettering himself.
cause hes lying? lol
This much edge
I didn't realise I was that far till I was about 20 miles out. I was following a bunch of rares and shit. I tried to start walking back and my leg gave in, called a cab and went hospital. They where like your fucking retarded and now I have to have a mri
I don't have a dock but so I've been riding around on my bike hands free on my quest to catch them all, actually have gotten a fuckton of pokemon
And yet you spend your time on Sup Forums of all places.
Admit, you're a fat edgelord as well, the only difference is, you don't like pokemon.
#blacklivesmatter
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i read your entire story OP
im better than him too man, some people just dont understand that we're just better overall and we look down on them.