How are you holding up, Sup Forums?

How are you holding up, Sup Forums?

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amon tobin is bae

I don't know about his later work....

What am I holding?

New music Friday

Doomsday Student aka Arab On Radar
>defenestrationcore

Bethlehem - s/t
>album starts with belching

I wrote a new song, I'll try it out at an open mic soon. I'm pretty unhappy

How are you holding up, user?

i'm not happy and idk when it'll get better

I'm sick with a cold

my life is full of people and social events but I don't have any friends
my creative energy went down the drain with my adolescence
I have money and assets but no prospects or drive to better myself, I have earned none of it
my girlfriend only listens to top 40 radio hits and shares buzzfeed videos on facebook almost every other day
I've let my body and athleticism go to shit through lack of exercise and terrible eating habits
I'm developing an e addiction
I want to feel sad but I just feel apathetic and bored

Hell be fine

Addiction to what?

sorry - ecstasy/mdma

Addiction how? Just psychological?

I keep listening to more shitty pleb music. I think I'm turning from a pretentious dickhead into a fucboi.

What makes you say that? Change of personality?

yes, I feel I am just becoming reliant upon it to have a good time

I'm succeeding academically but it's difficult to feel optimistic about the future when my ex is out being a sociable person while I sit at home playing Dark Souls 3 and listening to a lot of Bill Evans to make this music related

Fuck man I thought I'd be spending these whole holidays with her and now empty time is just stretching out endlessly in front of me

Thanks for asking my guy

fuck man thats rough

maybe you should travel?

Not too good at all really. Do you ever get that feeling where you feel like you'll end soon? Not necessarily die, just cease to exist. I never felt comfortable being alive, and most of my life is spent in suffering, but it feels as though it's almost over. I've been extra anxious and depressed because of this.

Fortunately I'm hanging out with this girl I'm really into tomorrow night and if I knew how, I'd try to make a move. But I can't read signs well, and in general human contact makes me nervous.

Listening to I Shalt Become - Wanderings.

Yeah I guess. I think I'm just tired and looking for easier ways to have fun.

I just want a cute girly boyfriend

Well that's not too bad. Just focus on not buying it? Clearly define to yourself why you don't want to be dependent on it so as to make a commitment to not buy it.

>need to stop smoking pot and drinking screwdrivers so often
>need to finish semester strong
>need to figure out how not to disassociate during sex

on the bright side
>hopeful career in music is approaching (as tour manager / journalist)
>my band was offered an opening spot for a Sup Forumscore solo project
>next semester looks stress-free

Been listening to a lot of Sleep's Holy Mountain

A little stressed out. In the middle of writing/composing/arranging an EP of songs. I'll be doing basically everything except making the cover desu. All the singing, piano/synth playing/, etc etc.

It's my first musical project so I'm being a little overtly perfectionist, but I've realized that i've been pretty unhappy for a long time and this project might be a big part of the reason why. I'm so worried about what people's reactions will be, even though ultimately, I should be doing this for myself.

I come from the classical world (sang opera at uni) and this project is more of an electro-art pop-dance rock hybrid that's pretty 00s radio pop inspired so it's a big stylistic change for me and I guess I'm just nervous of what the reception may be by those that used to know me as someone who did opera doing something completely different.

Thanks for asking. Even getting this out has helped me feel a bit better.

that doesn't sound too terrible. i believe in you!

I met a guy at on bar on thanksgiving night and I surprised myself because I hadn't talked to anyone as much as I did that night in over a year. We sat there for almost five hours talking. Really hit it off. Make out in his car afterwards. Go on a second date the next night, shorter but it was a great time.

The thing is, is that he lives almost 3 hours away, much more social then I am, has a better job then I do, different schedules, etc. and I just get the feeling that he'll decide that I'm not good enough. He seemed to really like me but something in the back of my mind is just poking me saying I should just break it off now. I've gotten drunk every night this week because I haven't had feelings for someone in a really long time and it's making me incredibly anxious. Not to mention I have herpes and I have to fucking stare in his face while I tell him I have some contagious, incurable, skin disorder I got from fucking some other dude.

He's invited me to spend the night at his place on Saturday and hang out Sunday and I'm going to talk to him about it before things get hot and heavy. I'm a pretty confident person and I've done "the talk" before but I've never really had feelings for the others so it wasn't nerve racking.

Fuck, I'm drunk

I kinda wanna feel not sad/apathetic most of the time for one of the first times in my life
But I'm not really sure how to be happy
I always seem to end up in situations where I get stressed for a brief period if time before just becoming apathetic to just about everything, but I never learn to avoid them so I have just fallen into a cycle of the same shit

Go and buy a cake a a nice cup of coffee. Go play a video game at the cinema complex. Go and meet a friend or ask someone to dinner. Jump up and down.

well you're never getting one you poof!

Also

Nails and Full of Hell split
>dude 7"s lmao

Rolling Stones
>blues aoty

Had a 4.0 during my whole freshman year and first half of sophmore year. Then depression hit me pretty hard. Kind of fell off the wagon.

Ehh I've been better. I've been procrastinating on this project I can't seem to start and it's coming closer and closer. I've also been lonelier than ever and wish I had a gf to hold out the winter with. I've also been having nightmares about running into my ex. I've been avoiding her this entire semester and now I panic every time I think I see her.

I've also not been listening to much of anything that requires any attention and barely had anytime for full albums. Feels bad man.

But isn't life brilliant sometimes? Young thug makes records, you can stream lots of music and porn for free, theres a new twin peaks season next year

Father Christmas is coming!

Might do the first one
Probably won't do the 2nd because I don't have a car right now and it's cold out
It's hard to meet friends when I don't go out much. Talking to strangers while drunk is fun though, but I rarely contact them again if we end up exchanging numbers
Probably won't ask someone to dinner because of fear of rejection
I won't jump up and down right now because it's late and I'm tired

Thanks for the suggestions though

Well, wiggle your toes then

The onset of seasonal depression combined with the fact that I've been single and hardly so much as touched a girl in almost 2 years is getting to me. I'm starting to crush on a girl I knew in high school who I haven't seen since graduation (almost 4 years ago) which isn't helping either

>Not to mention I have herpes
You need to tell him. *

* Spoiler alert: She won't tell him.

MODERN WOMEN FOLKS.

Aight

I just wanna be happy and find a good girl

Don't we all, user

>be 5/10 beta with autistic tendencies and a shitty personality
>still manage to get girls and have healthy relationships

seriously, what do you guys think you're doing wrong?

I'm a man and I've told the past three guys I've been with. I'm not as heartless as women

What do you think we're doing wrong?

beta af

Near crippling social anxiety and I keep falling for the wrong women

Every day we stray further from god.

london?

>girl in love with me
>don't really like her that way
>still lead her on regardless

And I've still never had a girlfriend. Don't feel they're worth it.

I mean I voted for the god emperor so I'm only half sinning

Stop killing my hopes you meanie

It's about that time of year where everything in my life just turns gray, and nothing really brings me enjoyment. I know by February it'll be bad and I won't want to even leave my room let alone my house. Just listened to Giles Corey for the first time today. Made me sad.

SOMETIMES ALL I REALLY WANT TO FEEL LOVED
SOMETIMES I'M ANGRY THAT I FEEL SO ANGRY

I tried cutting all this dumb Internet shit out of my life.

Then I realized I don't have anything else. It's my only comfort zone.

what kind of pleb music

>stopped being friends with two people from my job cause they were using me
>all i do is smoke weed and play overwatch now
>tfw no gf

at least i'm doing well in uni i guess

I just finished a bottle of Bacardi and I can't stop thinking about this fucking girl. I'm trying to come up with a way to talk to her that won't seem weird coming out of fucking nowhere. Suggestions? I'm thinking about asking if she knows her personality type since I'm pretty into MBTI and that's pretty innocent I think

Personality types atre a fucking meme. Just talk to her

youtube.com/watch?v=Anu5yh403Fs

I've been oscillating between complete contentment and extreme anxiety. I dropped a semester of school to travel, which was unquestionably the best experience of my life, and I'm glad I did it. But now I'm back home just sitting in my dark room on the internet all day every day, waiting for the next semester to start. I already feel my mental and physical health decaying back to the poor condition it was in before I left. And now I'm staring at the prospect of going into unrecoverable debt by pursuing school and being locked into a job my entire life, which is far worse now that I know what I'll be giving up.

His more recent stuff is still interesting, even though he got more conceptual and less... enjoyable. I'd just like to see him combine his focus on sound design with more traditional dance music again, it could be quite fresh for electronic music as a whole.

Same

Please don't leave man the internet is a comfy and good place. You can find alot of interesting things on here and good music.

im doing pretty ok

almost done my bachelors degree.

getting out of my comfort zone, making friends, but no one really wants to hang out with me. thats fine, i still have a lot to learn.

thanks for asking.

That's fair hahaha I just feel like I need some reason so I'm not just like "Hey" out of the blue

Stop using your computer in your room. Only get out your computer if you're in a library or another place you associate with studying. Get friends. Go out. Get drunk.

Jobs are fine if you realize you're working for something later in your life. But for now, study and make friends

Find something she likes and talk about it. Most people want to meet new people. Everyone isn't some snob fuck who only talks to the elite. Just start a conversation about anything. Stop overthinking about what you're going to say, just do it

>she
lol, new to Sup Forums I see

Start working out and eat healthy user, go out and be social, there's no shame in using your computer though, just distract yourself from not doing anything.

fuck you

I've been at this shit my entire waking life.

It will get better. It always gets worse again later, though.

Ok?

Jump down, head first

Tylo probablee be chilun

...

>tfw crippling social autism depression and borderline alcoholism
at least I have qt anime girls tbqh family

itt: lazy teenagers

>tfw autists in another thread claim that depression isn't real and self-deprecation is retarded

It's crazy how much you crave attention. What you're doing is pretty much why people don't talk about their depression.

It's how I fill the void.

im ok i guess

youtube.com/watch?v=dO-CXnn1T_g
sometimes I just dont know what to listen to and i just put on anything on to cover the silence

This is going to sound condescending but perhaps if you're really depressed you should find something more constructive to do than posting about depression under the pseudonym "GrimesCuck" on the music board of Sup Forums.

I have a tiny hunch that the way you are "filling the void" is actually contributing to your sadness. At least I can tell you that if I was doing what you are doing I'd want to neck myself too.

Eating chicken soup AMA

I'm trying to find a job atm since I quit my last one. This isn't a permanent solution. I appreciate the advice though.

I listened to three feet high and rising for the first time so I feel pretty good. Gonna listen to Paul's Boutique next, after I listen to this like 20 more times. I'm always afraid of listening to "classic" stuff in case I ends up being disappointed. I left off listening to radiohead because I thought they would suck, and they did.

i can't sleep user what do

barely

Go for a walk
Do some stretching excercises
Eat a banana
Turn off your computer, iphone, tablet
Close your eyes

drink and shitpost on Sup Forums

ok sounds good going for a walk right now dont leave when i come back

I hope you get better soon, user

:)

I am already in bed

I cannot express my true feelings.

Use uni as a main push to get yourself through things. Don't think of the shitty now, think of the endgame.

u schleep? u asleep?

no, I might go back to sleep tho

ok have a good nap

What's going on in here?

I've been stuck house sitting for family friends and I can't leave the house because if I do, the dogs at the house will start barking until I get back. I went out for a night once and when I came back the neighbours yelled at me because the dogs barked all night and have threatened to call the council which would mean the people who I'm house sitting for could lose the house. I haven't left the house for two weeks for anything but work, gym and groceries and it's starting to get to me. I have friends over but I'd just like to have a night where I don't feel like a prisoner.