Be me

>be me
>be 19, no job, no gf, no friends
>sit at home all day deciding when to kill myself
>dad went from being asshole to supportive
>gives me bars and weed whenever
>don't hate it

>few days ago
>dad stumbles into room
>trips over water bottle I left on the floor
>'heyy bud want some xanax?'
>smiling
>not unhappy like usual
>asks if I want to play cod zombies
>tell him maybe later, which means no
>he says ok he's gonna ride his bike (motorcycle)

>realize I'm the cause of his unhappiness
>he's just doing drugs to fill the void I cause
>he's propping himself up on bars
>so am I

What do? I'd rather kill myself than deal with the problems that have been unfolding the last ~decade, but I need a gun for that and I gotta go out of my way to get one.

Hate to say this, but as a father i feel fucking bad for your father

Killing yourself never ends pain, it just transfers it to your loved ones. It will get better, maybe not tomorrow or the next day but it will get better. Hang in there.

19???
legally adult, realistically still a kid
just get a grip

some people do this til they are 40, get a grip NOW

Stop being a degenerate and hang out with your probably chill dad. He probably loves you and your happiness=his happiness.

here is what you do. soldier through your own misery for the sake of your father. after he is gone you can do whatever you want but no parent should have to bury their child.

suck it up and stop being a selfish asshole

This

Same. I barely knew him until I was ~12 because my mom kept us apart (she was/is mentally ill, kept us apart, told me he was abusive, etc) while taking his money, fucking his friends, and shit talking him non-stop.

You can say that from reading a little tidbit of this, but this isn't a 1 sided issue and that won't be true the more I get into this

I've been fed that meme my entire life and nothings changed

Well no ones gonna bury me, I've already planned how I'd do it and it involves disappearing so no one has to see it

Who the fuck gets a job at 19

Your dad is gonna be worse off if you kill yourself dude

be patient and you'll know what to do, been there done that

you are a fuck if you leave your da in the state he is in. your own self pity will drive you both t suicide. stop being a little bitch.

I have 3 jobs and I work 60-90h a week.
I'm 19.

Give me your email, skype or anything so I can tell you how to improve yourself.

You're not a piece of shit.
You can do better.
Take out your balls.

lies. lies lies lies lies lies.

you are just lookin for attention

>hang in there

Lol feggit

Where the fuck do you live where 19 yr olds don't work full time???

India

Kfc and newspaper delivery isn't a full time job faggot

I live in canada. Most of my grad class went and worked in oil patch immediately out of high school unless they did college

Good plan OP I think you should definitely kill yourself

I'm a fuck for keeping him in the states hes in. I can see how your logic works but it goes both ways.

Congrats mate, before I quit my job I probably made what you make working 35 hours a week. Too bar work doesn't translate to wealth

bait

Yea we don't work in oil patches. We graduate with professional degrees and earn $$$

if you haven't done it already and you're asking for help you most likely don't want to die

that said why is everyone telling him it's gonna be ok instead of trying to get him to suicide on stream?

where i live nobody works more than 40 hours a week. because that is just retarded. 60 - 90 hour weeks are the domain of doctors and nurses and high level executives not 19 year olds you lying piece of shit.

If you don't own a house by the time you're 30 you aren't wealthy

Lololol. You dont think oil patch workers make bank?? Those fuckers be rich as hell. I went to uni. Was a big mistake.

Trips of trust

Right because talking about it attention from you autists is the driving force behind my thoughts

Right but I'm 19

Stfu foghorn leghorn. Going to uni to study liberal arts isn't considered education

you're own self pity is what is keeping him there. what is it that has you so down? all you said is that you're home all day with no girlfriend.

you wont find one in your house you retard.

*your

Has anyone really been far as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

sorry. i got carried away typing. his bitch attitude has me fucking up. no wonder his pops is down.

*father

. . . can you read? You're fucking retarded.

Canada, the land of the poor and reject Indians, Pakistanis and niggers

Go get a job at Tim Hortons.
Job, Money and Free Donuts.
Happiness

Your mom

well, my father is probably one of the main reasons i'm like this, son of a bitch drained the last of my self esteem, so fuck him
yeah, don't know what you can do, maybe make a deal with him, like a pact, get both of your lives back on track together

dont off yourself because daddy issues

and stop being a faggot

Ending your life when you got no desire to change the shit that is in your life. I'd normally say kys but your father needs you but too bad he has a degenerate of a son

Theres way more diversity in the USA. When i was a kid i never saw anyone who wasnt white until i was like 10.

And about poor... did you read what i said about oil field workers making bank??? Because they do. Buying houses and expensive ass trucks in thier early 20's.

holy fuck you fucking faggot
what i would give for my dad to be alive and trying to connect with me
man up you dickhead
you're that mans son
fuck if you wont have him tell him to adopt me

stop fucking with drugs
weed is kind of okay but only if you can moderate yourself, ditto with alcohol

jesus dude you dont know how good you have it if all you have to worry about is your dad trying to connect with you and having no friends

stand up right now
if its day time go outside and sit there for 5 minutes and really think about what matters to you

if its night do the same but stare at those stars

dont get out your phone and fuck with the internet

jesus christ man you can fall so much further, just dont
TRY to find something that intrests you
i found photography and writing
seriously if theres a better outlet for releasing
emotions writing or art are hard to be beaten
at the very fucking least man just go out camping for a few days
Literally just up and go, tell dad and invite him
if he can make it great. But if you dont feel like that shit then by all means dont invite him, just dont stress him out
Seriously, as fucked as you think things are just recoup and think what you want.
Its difficult but having an outline will do wonders in life, having a hobby outside of the net will do even more

because I´m not a 12 year old in a trenchcoat wearing black makeup.

will never understand that kind of mindset. "my life is so shit because im a do nothing bitch but all i will do is bitch and moan about it and talk about suicide"

not ur fault user

Buy sleeping pills and take them all.
Or Make a Noose