Alright fags. It's been a long time since I've come to this shit hole and nothings changed

Alright fags. It's been a long time since I've come to this shit hole and nothings changed.

Let's do a threat about time travel.

Situation: you where teleported back in time with nothing but what you are wearing on your body ( only clothes) . Medieval times right before major discoveries of gun powder. We will say somewhere in Europe.

Question: what knowledge can you bring back in time to teach those retards in order to 1. Improve their quality of life. Or 2. Dominate over them as a super intelligent overlord.

Twist: your knowledge must be complete. No half assing. Also it cannot be too advanced for them or they will label you as a witch.

Give me some OC faggots.

Bump

Personal hygiene

Mastubatory techniques

How to find all the others still-to discover continents of the world to subjugate them in the name of some europa sovereign, then be at the head of his newfound colonies with an iron fist, and lots of personal pleasures.
Of course, historically, I'd have to sell it as going to China and Japan at first to be financed, and get Rome's approval to convert the population and give them salvation to be able to treat them as I see fit

You just going to walk up to a king and tell him you are here to take his job?

No, I'm his humble emissary to the new world, I shall control those pesky noblemen and greedy soldiers in his name. You know, a Viceroy. After all it would still be weeks or months to reach the new land, so an emissary is necessary, and as proposer and discoverer I could get the job

Terrorism . Practical.

I'd predict a bunch of shit.
Become leader. Rule the world.
No one would survive my tyranny. Bring fear, chaos, and many things to a time before. Use manipulating techniques to keep my army in order. None shall step the line in which I place. Absolute power would be mine and mine alone. My name will be in the history books, As the most brutal ruler of the world. Fuck about every bitch in the world. My descendants will keep my name in power. Its the year 20XX, time to get up now, salute the portrait of the great one, surveillance at all times for you must be loyal to the bloodline. Go eat mandated nutritious food. There are no skin colors anymore, black, white, brown, yellow, red. All trash in the eys of the ruler, My descendant. Now off to mandated learning, for none shall live without the needed education needed to provide for the bloodline. Science, art, everything in the name of the bloodline, the most advanced is what the bloodline wants, you must learn to survive. Glory to him, for he hath giveth knowledge to such lowly people. Now off to lunch, approved by the bloodline. Yum. Finished, to the learning centers once again. Finished with school, back to your cubicle, read from approved bloodline textbooks. Finished reading you go to bed at an approved time by the bloodline. Once time travel is created, I'll be your ruler.

Wire structures for seine warfare would be super useful

Basic human anatomy. Skip over balancing the biles bullshit. Fucking retards

The International System of Units, so they can commerce better and improve economy and amerifags will already have it and won't be a pain in the ass about switching to it

Dumbass, China invented gun power way before the medieval times. Nice try kid.

Yeah but it wasn't widely used in europe. Which is why you are plopped there. Fegiet.

...

Never thought of that one. Good point. Also conversely you could teach them the almighty imperial system instead. AMERICA

No kidding? Damn, I must've missed something. No sarcasm bro. Phrasing this question within the context of the dark ages is retarded, and even more so when you know anything about the history of the world during the "dark ages."

I'd bring back two minute noodles and impress the maidens

Well that's because I am retarded.

cant bring anything except yourself and your clothes

ill take all of Sup Forumscore and re-create it and they will follow me into battle as the first bard/king

...

Well, I couldn't teach them that, since I have no idea how you convert unit to unit there. OP also said "your knowledge must be complete. No half assing" so ISU is my only option here

You could teach them get rich quick schemes. The pyramid scheme and whatnot. And by teach mean take advantage of them with.

>Hey fag give me your gold i can dupe it right in front of your eyes
>Oi lad in me knickers by the queen! *gives gold*
>thanks pleb *runs away with gold*
>Damn rapscallions!

I have more than basic understanding of firearms, and reloading. Get a job in metallurgy and secretly craft a few rudimentary semi automatic rifles and thousands of rounds. Then single handedly raid villages and pillage. Call myself Pinkie Pie and go down in history as "Pinkie Pie the Terrible"

>and nothings changed
You haven't been gone long, then. Otherwise, you would notice the massive increase in moralfags/leejunfags.

Yeah I did notice actually. Also alot of cuckolding now? What's that about.

ive been sitting here for five minutes trying to figure out what the fuck you are on about

yeah i dont think people were very willing to give up their gold. regardless of trick.

also what the fuck is a leejunfag?
im a Sup Forums veteran. with the ptsd and everything.

Teach all white Europeans Eugenics and tell them all non whites are going to eventually out breed them if they don't murder them all, and that they are the cause of all disease. Give them basic sailing, geography, and firearm knowledge. Return to present day, where racism is solved.

Find OPs relative in that period, and kill them, so this post would never be made.
/Thread

Wasn't there a movie based on something like that? I forgot the name though. Fuck

Plot twist, find OPs ancestor and fuck them, Now I'm your grandpappy

Inventing the cotton gin and the printing press. It would rush the industrial revolution and increase written history. You would go down in history as someone who revolutionized the world.

>Wasn't there a movie based on something like that?
about killing op's relatives? i think you're mistaken

You have to pick a great name tho, like Jack Mehoff

Nah about sending a group of people back in time to kill someone that went back in time to the dark ages. It was actually a neat movie. Also please kill my ancestors I want to never exist.

Wasnt that a goosebumps episode? Except for the killing relatives.

Fuck all, nobody would understand the way you speak and you'd get pretty much instantly killed for witchcraft or something like that

I'm not brushed up on my goosebumps .no clue.

I'm glad you pointed that out . Old English is retarded so I would pretend to be mute until I learned it. But knowing how to read and write is a huge advantage .

Disprove god. Hail satan

Good thing I'm wearing a Glock

hope you're also a chemist.. producing gunpowder and priming compound is a little tricky.

9 bullets aren't going to get you very far (is it 9 in a glock??)

Kek to that name. A+

>go back to medieval times
>have plan to make a ton of money and bang a ton of whores
>first day back in time
>manage to gain employment at a small in
>wake up the next morning
>eat breakfast of berries and eggs
>immediately die from stomach infection
>mfw

glock 19 is 15 rounds per mag, and op said just clothes, but fuck op, i'd come back strapped with my bugout bag and my gear, coz i always got that shit on me lol .. and i carry a glock 19 IWB, pic related.

i could construct a rudimentary muzzle loading rifle / pistol / flintlock .. and i know how to make black powder / gunpowder.. i would probably teach people how to harness electricity .. and gain wealth and power through that

KekS

Introducing people to a weapon system that advanced would be disastrous . So many people would die ( more than the normal amount anyways)

Not that hard, my wife has a master's In Chem and we have made some before for learning purposes...

Introduce them to my little bronies

Assuming I can speak Latin or whatever

>Tell them I am monk that has been visited by angles

>Warn them of demons residing in mold/feces/being expelled by sick people

>boiling your drinking water can kill these demons

>God also wants me to tell you to stop shitting in the street you disgusting urchins

Teach birth control, Eugenics, self-sufficiency, and shame /kill lazy fucks. World becomes a better place.

Teach them weed is kool. And to chill.

I could craft a crude bicycle. And maybe save the future from so much pollution

Teach them to fuck over middle east and claim it as their own

I will inform them about a god named Adolf Hitler that will arrive in 1889. The people will be told to treat him with respect and listen to him. If the god is not respected or listened to, Europe will have a bad future.

i would lead my way to rome an claim i am a angel of god and wish to speak with the religious leaders of the world i will prove i am with a phone i have in my pocket as i have the opening music for halo, i will pass that off as the choir of heaven once i am through i will shoot the religious leaders and gain controll of them, then i will disband the churches and lead humanity on a path of science and technology starting with the discovery of black powder ( in the useless knowledge i hold one of which i have learnt how to make black powder) but i will not show them how to use in warfare instead show them engines and how steam can be used to benefit comfort and intelect.

in a few hundred years the industrial age will hit well before what it did in our timeline. thus making us incredibly more advanced and better yet no fucking religion

Teach them about the wonders of Tabaco
Get them hooked on Tabaco
Repeat
????
Profit

>No Murica discovery
>No tobacco

i would start a spooky ghost club

im back from the past.

travel all over the world and kill all the niggers and Arabs. Then remove religion to increase the technological advancements over time to create a truly superior modern society