I'm really desperate for sex. I've tried fapping with used tampons and condoms (when I'm lucky) because it's the closest I can get to sex. I've licked them. Tasted them. Drank them. Eaten them. I tried fapping with used diapers that I find in McDonalds and from my neighbor (who has a 3 year old kid who is cute). I go through her trash. But because of the hormone pills she takes, she seems to never have periods (?). I do all of this in my bathtub while drunk.
I wish I was a zoophile. That way, I could buy a dog and have sex with it and be happy forever. Or I wish I was a mortician and then I could just have sex with the corpses. When I was young I was really into Pokemon. I remember being attracted to certain Pokemon which resembled real-life animals.
I am thinking of having sex with animals as a last resort. Like a horse or a dog. Except right now I can probably only afford a cat/kitten. I'm not even attracted to animals. I want to have sex with a human. :( But I have no choice and I hope animals will be enough. :(
So how is the sex with animals? If I bought a kitten and trained it to love sex, will it have sex with me willingly? If I bought one which is so young that its eyes are closed and I trained it to love sex, will it love sex with me? Fuck, I don't even like bestiality. But I am so desperate...
How does cat sex work? Does he/she just do it like normal sex? Is there any ejaculation? I'm guessing I can't actually put my penis in a girl cat but what about my tongue? What about a boy cat?
This seems to be my only recourse. :( :( :(
Joshua Walker
just buy a fleshlight you creep
Matthew Smith
Also I go to the lost property boxes in schools and swimming pools and gyms so I can fap with the clothes that people misplace. I also sniff them but 99 times out of 100 the smell is gone by the time I get to them. I imagine than my penis is inside them. I imagine that my face is up next to their crotch.
:(
Caleb Lewis
zacly
Jayden Collins
Sometimes I buy bananas and carrots and have sex with them. But it's not enough. A fleshlight probably wouldn't be much different. Except I would be on the giving end rather than the receiving end.
I want to have sex with a horny dog or cat. Are there any bestiophiles here?
Caleb Wood
For the love of god. Spare the animals. Just get yourself a escort or travel to Thailand.
Ethan Thompson
No you sick fuck
Jeremiah Lee
Spare the animals pls. Except goats. Goats are such sluts!
William Martinez
Goats is fuckable if you're a sandnigger
Mason Sullivan
...
Hunter Green
fuckin animals is fine by me ill just say fuck a great dane or something just as big, if you fuck something german shepard sized or smaller youll hurt them, dont be a piece of shit
Josiah Gonzalez
nigga you what
having sex with an animal and literally eating shit are the worst things you can do, it won't be anywhere as fulfilling as sex and it's fucking gross. you won't be happy that you "lost your virginity" you'll be haunted by the fact you hunted through the trash to find diapers and the fact that you bummed a kitten
Ayden Taylor
wat
Zachary Robinson
No, you sick fuck.
I agree with this guy. I say, go to fuckin' thailand or fuck a local escort you fucking weirdo
Austin Reed
you can try Follow your dreams user
Noah Perez
made me lol funniest post I've seen in a long time
Juan Johnson
Oh, you're one of those who suck dicks of the pure norwegian mooses only.
Jackson Perez
>sex with animals as a last resort.
Try not having sex. Try being a strong person.
I was celibate from 24 until 29. I'm now happily married. Sex every month.
This did not destroy me. You are capable of more than you realize. Keep it up.
Logan Long
At least i'm not a sandnigger
Luke Rogers
prostitutes exist for this.
Cameron Gonzalez
Fucking newfags falling for this pasta
Leo Myers
Fucking this
Angel Hernandez
>mom, dad, I suck dog dicks, >but I'm not a sandnigger, sou you can still be proud of me
Nolan Sanchez
>wat
YEAR OLD VIRGIN HERE.
>>I'M REALLY DESPERATE FOR SEX. I'VE TRIED FAPPING WITH USED TAMPONS AND CONDOMS (WHEN I'M LUCKY) BECAUSE IT'S THE CLOSEST I CAN GET TO SEX. I'VE LICKED THEM. TASTED THEM. DRANK THEM. EATEN THEM. I TRIED FAPPING WITH USED DIAPERS THAT I FIND IN MCDONALDS AND FROM MY NEIGHBOR (WHO HAS A 3 YEAR OLD KID WHO IS CUTE). I GO THROUGH HER TRASH. BUT BECAUSE OF THE HORMONE PILLS SHE TAKES, SHE SEEMS TO NEVER HAVE PERIODS (?). I DO ALL OF THIS IN MY BATHTUB WHILE DRUNK.
>>I WISH I WAS A ZOOPHILE. THAT WAY, I COULD BUY A DOG AND HAVE SEX WITH IT AND BE HAPPY FOREVER. OR I WISH I WAS A MORTICIAN AND THEN I COULD JUST HAVE SEX WITH THE CORPSES. WHEN I WAS YOUNG I WAS REALLY INTO POKEMON. I REMEMBER BEING ATTRACTED TO CERTAIN POKEMON WHICH RESEMBLED REAL-LIFE ANIMALS.
>>I AM THINKING OF HAVING SEX WITH ANIMALS AS A LAST RESORT. LIKE A HORSE OR A DOG. EXCEPT RIGHT NOW I CAN PROBABLY ONLY AFFORD A CAT/KITTEN. I'M NOT EVEN ATTRACTED TO ANIMALS. I WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH A HUMAN. :( BUT I HAVE NO CHOICE AND I HOPE ANIMALS WILL BE ENOUGH. :(
>>SO HOW IS THE SEX WITH ANIMALS? IF I BOUGHT A KITTEN AND TRAINED IT TO LOVE SEX, WILL IT HAVE SEX WITH ME WILLINGLY? IF I BOUGHT ONE WHICH IS SO YOUNG THAT ITS EYES ARE CLOSED AND I TRAINED IT TO LOVE SEX, WILL IT LOVE SEX WITH ME? FUCK, I DON'T EVEN LIKE BESTIALITY. BUT I AM SO DESPERATE...!
Dominic Jackson
Just look for escorts or resort to fat chicks OP, if you think you're the only one horny enough to fuck animals you're very wrong indeed.
Brody Harris
do you have money? just get a prostitute, wtf. even if you're that desperate, imagine seconds before you die and you remember all you did in your life. "I fucked a cat because i was horny xDDD". unless you're a fucking nigger, this shouldn't even come into your fucking mind. you can probably hire a hooker for one or two hours for the price of that cat, which btw, you can't train to like sex (and if you try to fug it, you'll only hurt it and give it internal damage. good luck explaining it to the vet, unless you let them).
like holy shit user. are you legitimately, literally, clinically retarded?
Jose White
You're trying to hard
Adam Gray
>> every month
Yeah you sure won the lottery
Dylan Brown
german shepherd or even lab is fine if you are slightly below average size and wait until she's to fuck her. you'll find once she has you once or twice she'll start begging for your cock in subsequent heats. srsly tho, it's not hard to find fuckable desparate women.
Christian Price
>> sex "every month" Hahahahahaha !! Living the dream...
Evan Myers
>until she's in heat to fuck her goddamn interuptions
Hudson Clark
Just get a Fucking prostitude
Carter Collins
Every day we fall further from God's grace.
Tyler Turner
What about a golden retriever? I've heard that they tend to be a gentle and well mannered breed. My cock is 13 cm or 5.2 inches when erect.
Alexander Stewart
Seriously OP just pay some whore to have sex with you. If you take a shower and clean up beforehand they won't turn you down if you have the money.
Daniel Wright
honestly if you're freaking out this much about it, just visit an escort.
your life will change when you realize sex is kinda meh most of the time.
Ryan Ross
nice trips. Didn't understand the purpose of your comment, though
You're 24 op, no fucking 40, you still have potential.
take the opportunity to change your life for the better, sex will come automatically.
So, be a normie, act cool, and have sex.
Carter Jones
hire an escort that will agree to sex
Charles Nelson
find a sheep or a goat and enjoy yourself on it. You don't have to buy one, just wander until you find a farm (depends on where you live, though). You can also go prostitutes, or rape some grill. Buy drug online, find a desperate drunk slut and party time.
Joseph Butler
Go to the /jp/ onahole thread you fucking idiot
Zachary Hernandez
Apparent troll
Lincoln Gomez
>I wish I was a zoophile. That way, I could buy a dog and have sex with it and be happy forever. Or I wish I was a mortician and then I could just have sex with the corpses. Yeah, then you'd be happy. The key here is you can't deal with people and only want to serve your need for sex. Nothing in your way except that howling, sucking gap in your chest where most people keep their souls.
Liam Jenkins
do not have sex with anything, no whores, no animals, nothing. evolution has deemed you worthless and you should just end your life before circumventing the process with a hooker or forcing your deranged self on an innocent animal. you have 2 real options, buy a sex doll, or put a bullet through your skull.
