Let's have good clean joke thread

let's have good clean joke thread

no swearing or smut here please, only g rated laughs

wats a pirates favrit letter?

>R

lol

this is a funny one, and it appeals the website Sup Forums because you are computer guys

9gag... really? Reall really?

No it,s the C!

oops forgot to add it

What's funny about some ugly cunt throwing a man out of his own house? I'm not laughing.

...

haha very funny you 2

You be wrong matey, a true pirate's heart belongs to the C

XDDDDDDD TRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

...

this is onyxceptable

what does a japanese little sister ride to school??
her niiissssaaannnn!!!

haha very clever
please send me this picture please my email address is [email protected]

thank you

Pirate walk into a bar.

Batender asks "Why do you have a Steering Wheel on your crotch?"

Pirate replies "Arrr, it,s driving me nuts!"

...

oh no this awful
could someone please delete this, how do we get rid of it

What do you call a guy who you just can't stand and also has no feet?!

What's the deal with the DMV?
It's just a huge pain in the butt and everyone is rude. Even the other people in line are rude, everyone just becomes an awful person when they're at the DMV.
I remember this one time I was in line waiting to get my drivers license renewed and I guess I got a little to close to the guy in front of me. He turns around with this crazed look in his eyes and he said "reply to this post or your mother will die in her sleep tonight"

whatever you want he has to crawl after you

what

What does Ryu (Street Fighter) says when he,s on the toilet?

I,m POOOOPen

Lack Toes Intolerant

What do you call a man with no arm or legs that,s in the ocean?

1: Bob
2: Screwed

I was standing at the airport and a guy came up and asked me are you European? and I said no I'm just standing here.

(European, youre-a-peeing get it)

I told my friend ten jokes to get him to laugh but no pun in ten did.

Why did I laugh fuck

Fuck niggers

1. Escalators don’t break down… they just turn into stairs 2. “I’m sorry” and “I apologize” mean the same thing… except when you’re at a funeral. 3. I intend to live forever… or die trying. 4. We never knew he was a drunk… until he showed up to work sober. 5. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. 6. A blind man walks into a bar….And a table, and a chair. 7. At what age is it appropriate to tell my dog that he’s adopted? 8. Want to hear a pizza joke…. nah, it’s too cheesy. What about a construction joke? Oh never mind, I’m still working on that one. Did you hear the one about the rope? Skip it. Have you heard the one about the guy in the wheelchair? Never mind, it’s too lame. 9. I used to be in a band, we were called ‘lost dog’. You probably saw our posters. 10. I childproofed the house… but they still get in!

What has two legs and bleeds?

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza??
pizza dont scream when you put it in the oven

Holy shit these are so bad. No wonder so many kids today are autistic

A dog in half

So I was eating out my girlfriend the other day and tasted horse semen. Then I thought to myself "ooooh, that's how you died grandma."

Nice.

What's the difference between a baby and a cake?

You don't ejaculate on the cake before you eat it.

How's the 7th grade?

how do you make a dead baby float?
scoop of ice cream and two scoops of dead baby

What do Jews and stoners have in common? Getting baked.

Mommy mommy!
I don,t wanna run in circles anymore!

Shut up or I,ll nail your other foot to the floor.

lost my shit