Prove you are Scottish

Prove you are Scottish.

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Akkkk nooo....

I have red hair and sexual relations with sheep.

you first, prick

I Killed the English soldiers in the battle of Stirling amongside William Wallace

I put my heroin through the fryer first

...

i haven't spoken to my parents in 30 years, when i finally reunited with them, all they had to say was ''ayy'' ... thats it.

youtube.com/watch?v=xfKhDiUNOG0

I stirred last night's haggis.

I voted yes.

I ate haggis. It wasn't on a dare. I prefer toad in the hole.

I say I want Independence but in fact all I want is to piss off the English.

i dont need an excuse to drink

Just why though? It never ends well.

Scottish twitter is my new favorite thing

Tunnock's teacakes are best cakes

...

I'm not Scottish, but my wife is half scott, so I have a kilt now.

No sry, thats empire biscuits.

Naw ya fucking dick

Not based snowballs.

...

How do you find it? I use mine a lot for kayleighs

Bolt ya rocket

i dont like coconut

you get the ones with chocolate sprinkles instead, amazing hangover cure, 2 of them and some coffee

Im gonie coconut you ya dobber

watp

sigh, y tho

FTP

>tfw the Vatican will be sacked by muzzies, hopefully within our lifetimes

unless youre in glasgow, die of heart disease age 27

Irn Bru tastes good

...

>dat fiery bru

lolol

Waaaah I'm pissed that my country has nothing to show for itself and my neighbour is vastly superior in every way.

>tfw fife
please kill me

ok bro

My old man (who fae leeds) used to get right pissed that i fucking point blank refused to support in England after Scotland had invariably punted from whatever footie thing we were in. I was pure wee dick about it considering that he would support his adopted homeland in any meeting.of the teams.
RIP pops.

these look like slavs or polak

Wrap that pish yeh cunt or Ill stamp yer fucking coupon.

exactly, celtic fans, they're all cataholics

Fuck off cunt

Ah fuckin hate the weather, the people and just about everything else here. But i'll fucking stab any cunt who talks shite aboot it

u just jelly because Scotland has fit as fuck lasses and your rank southern girls have fannys like ripped oot fireplaces.

Suck a meaty banger.

Patter like toothpaste

I think one we can all agree on.
When Americans refer to the entirety of the UK as "England". That fucking ENRAGES me.

I also remember while I was living in Holland, a few work colleagues were asking where Scotland was, and they had a map of GB up, and they were pointing to England saying "That's Scotland!"

I said no it's not, so the pointed at Ireland and Wales before pointing to Scotland. They were dead serious. They had no idea.

yer da sells avon

fuckin mans a legend.

can't beat Limmy's Show

nothin quite like finding an empty bottle of bucky in a hedge outside the primary school

one of them wee bastards brought it in

>kayleighs

i'm an unemployed alcoholic heroin addict

>while I was living in Holland

It's the Netherlands, you Jocktard.

That fucking ENRAGES me, etc.

Yeah, but people in the UK don't call it the Netherlands, or Nederlanse
They call it Holland.

So, I was just making an assumption so people knew what the fuck i was talking about

what does "patter like toothpaste " mean?
Minty? Fresh? I can't think of any implied negative connotations about toothpaste.

I'm as proud of this country as the next Yes voter, but I seriously cannot stand Scots typing in their accent.

It's pure fuckin' annoyin, ye soond like a wee radge cunt wi sowt tae prove like.

Seriously, you sound like morons. I doubt you type like that in other threads.

You must be from Ayr

stop talking oot of yer ars you wee cunt, they say both depending on where you are

>not wanting to have a great fucking time dancing with lots of girls, getting them fired up with adrenaline then pumpin them round the bins

comes out a tube

This.

Yeah, we have the accent, yeah, we speak like that, but why the fuck do we have to type like that...

"Hey, how are you?"
"orite pal? hoosit goan?"

it's just a verbal form of stupidity.

it's spelled ceilidh ya dick

I occasionally drop in a bit of scottish banters then wait till someone tries to correct me, then you can accuse them of being culturally insular and ignorant.

>keyleighs

cant beat a shag behind a wheeliebin round the back of a butchers

I do it sometimes slightly when im trying to tell a funny story or know were having a laugh where the accent swings it. But when people do it all the time its awful.

braw thread man.

aye

Oh my fucking god I had no idea what they were talking about with kayleighs until you said this

Fuck me i'm gonna use that as a regular joke now

fair doos, im a tit.

heres me writing a nice wee story about me and my English old man and theres you being a fucking cock.

I think he means that Holland is part of the Netherlands, in the same way that Scotland is part of Britain. You were making the same mistake you accused other people of.

Do you see?

god help this poster

>heres me writing a nice wee story about me and my English old man and theres you being a fucking cock.

Holland is actually a Dutch province so if he was living there it's not wrong to say that.

Shit, sorry man. Didnt mean to reply to you. I liked that story reminded me of morton and St Mirren but with me and cousins.

slainte mhath

Lol ask scots something about self identification and half of them make references to hating the english.
If this thread was "prove you are english" not a single post would be to do with scots. None of us give a fuck.
Is that all you haggis munchers do up there in the cold? Conspire about your hate for the english? Between signing on and injecting of course.

Shit man, i'm a fuckin' fanny.

Sorry about that shite, had a joint and skipped lunch, i'm just shitposting

nobody cares

I actually was living in Holland, so I guess everyone's just jumping to conclusions.

78 replies and yours is the only the 3rd to mention the English in any kind of bad light. We're not that obsessed with you mate, I know you'd like us to be.

I'm aff,you are clearly a Sup Forums-autist who communicates in memes
Don't you have a court appointed appropriate behaviours class to attend as part of your sex offenders rehab course?

Whit tha fuck did ye jus' call me, cunt?

You realise there's a fair few of us from Scotland who live in England now?

I moved down to a small town, where I now live with my Mrs, and her entire family love me, but are INCREDIBLY racist towards Scots.

We just throw it back and forth every family get together, I insult them, they insult me, we laugh

It does exist in England, but not all of England hate Scotland, and vice versa.

this was why I couldn't read Trainspotting. loved the movie though

we live in a freezing, grey, miserable shithole and the only pleasure we get is from the tight, cold lips of slags and the intoxication of heavy drinking and hard drugs

we don't care when or where we die we just hope it happens soon

t.person from moray

No man, I'm not the poster who slagged off your post.

I found what you said genuinely funny, because it was true.

Didn't mean to insult you, chief.

I voted yes for independence and i'll vote yes again when it comes around

I deep fry my heroin

yer da sells avon

Yer maws a welder, best in Fife I heard.

How the fuck does a sheep weld?

>The gif

what did you guys think of the new robot wars