Who's the eldest kissless virgin here

who's the eldest kissless virgin here

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Beat this.

I'm almost 34.

>
>be 20
>never kissed
>not even held a girls hand

and probably gonna die virgin

how the fuck have you not been kissed
i know 13 year olds that have kissed

34 years old without having ever kissed a girl...damn man, i cant even feel your feel, that mus have been tough, do you have some hope at least ?

you dont choose virginity, virginity choose you

...

if you havent bought a prostitute by 30 there is no hope

I am terrified of getting stuck in a commitment.

at my age of 20 i already see there's no hope for me, cant even imagine a decade more for this, it gets worse the older you get, its like you are leveling up on virginity and you cant take it off

>Be me
>go to private Christian school with only 24 pupils from ages 5-14
>be 14
>only girls my age are 10
>go out with 10 year old
>kiss 10 year old
>make out with 10 year old
>never did any more
>she gets really in to me
>leave that school for high school
>come back for some movie showing
>younger brother still goes to the school, family goes along
>10 year old finds me
>cuddles up to me under a blanket
>tries to slowly put her hands down my pants
>can see she's REALLY nervous
>very Christian girl, never done anything like this
>plus she's 10
>she just holds on to my pretty damn hard cock throughout the movie
>she's looking dead ahead and rubs the head with her thumb
>she's cuddling me as tight as she possibly can

Can't imagine what it'd be like for someone to miss out on something as hot as that

had first kiss at 16 and lost virginity at 18. I'm not even attractive I just don't have autism

op here

you got no idea how i fucking envy you man, im a pedo well i dont if pedo but i find prespuberescent girls hot as shit specially ages (8-12) probably because i have been lonely as fuck in my school years, i feel pathetic

>be 14
>only girls my age are 10
>go out with 10 year old
>kiss 10 year old
>make out wi-
M-MOOOODS

17. Soon to be a 67 year old virgin.

Continued as I get older
>be me again
>be 15
>move to a small country town
>get asked to join a brass band because I'm the town pianist
>meet a girl there
>she's 13 but has a massive rack
>a bit lol xd random, but obviously keen for the D
>she dumps her then 13 yo boyfriend
>we start going out
>would drive around to hers and spend time around the paddocks just talking until the sun sets and we both have to go home
>one day we build and light a camp fire
>she's wearing these blue demin short shorts
>we're looking into the fire, she's resting her head on my shoulder
>without saying a word we look at each other and kiss
>she has braces, instant braces fetish for years afterwards
>we lie down and stay up way later than we should watching the stars
>explosion of childhood sexuality
>we would always walk to the river near the apple orchard
>make out against the tree
>she'd grind her crotch against mine
>felt her breath quicken as she pushed her face into my neck
>always feel her legs quiver
>didn't realise she was cumming, seemed too easy
>one day I drive to her house late at night knowing the local cop was asleep
>creep in through her window
>parents next room over
>whispering quieter than I ever have
>I lie next to her as we hold eachother tighter than ever
>feel our hearts beating like mad
>never done this before
>we start grinding into eachother
>I remember her satin boxers against my dick
>she starts quivering
>my dick suddenly slides inside her
>she's so incredibly wet and warm
>she audibly moans and and I feel her grip on me tighten
>we start fucking
>she won't stop making noise
>I have to cover her mouth with my hand
>she looks at me with eyes I'd never seen
>she suddenly discovers what she likes

I have lots of these stories if anyones interested.

So fucking romantic, did you guys get married?

dont want to hear your stories gettin' laid bro

>be 14
>only girls my age are 10

Got moar on this one?

MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO M-M-MOOOOD MOOOOO

>Be us, sexually experimenting
>one day lying together in her lounge watching Tv
>her parents owned a pub, house out the back
>dad doing accounting by the computer
>mum doing the ironing while watching tv
>us under a blanket
>my hand is on her stomach
>i remember playfully tickling her
>she's trying to suppress her giggles because we're literally in the periphery of her parents
>she slowly takes my hands and slides them down her jeans
>she guides my finger inside her with hers
>I see her run her hand up to her breast and really slowly squeezing her nipple
>parents talking about the bar
>I can feel her getting close to cumming
>she'd always get noticeably wetter and start grinding into my hand
>I can see her eyelids fluttering
>she's grinding as subtly as she can
>breathing coming out in short sharp isolated huffs
>I feel her cum into my hands
>she turns around and kisses me on the cheek
>parents are none the wiser

I have kissed a girl when I was 4-5 years. Am i still a kissless virgin? 23 here.

no you are not, you are a normie

GET AWAY YOU NORMIE

>be worthless kissless NEET virgin
>see this thread
>click on it
>expect it to be a feels thread about lonely Sup Forumstards
>it's a thread full of fucking normies
>talking about their sexual experiences
>their romantic experiences
>in front of us fucking kissless virgins
REEEE FUCK YOU CHADS

grow a fucking spine.

Na, she only got more attractive as time went on and got the attention of other guys. As I hit 18 I went to uni and she was still in school. I became incredibly jealous because I was lonely and insecure (being a fuckwit 18 year old), obsessively logged into her facebook account. That shit's like crack man, it's an addiction that you can't stop.
She went to a school formal (a ball for you merifats) with some other guy because you weren't allowed people from outside school. I read her facebook account and she wrote to her friend how she could feel that guys abs against her stomach when they danced and how hot it was
I broke up with her, she cried like mad, took a few days off school and drove up to see me, begged me to stay with her. We fucked, I stayed with her for a while because I was, like I said, insecure and desperately lonely.
She blew a couple guys after that according to her facebook chat. Clean sweep break up, blocked her on facebook, removed all evidence of her existence, deleted photos, deleted chats, threw away gifts, harbored a vicious obsessive hatred for her for about 4 years, into my next and out of my next relationship. Thought about her every day, non stop. Would try to pinch myself everytime I thought of her to trick my brain into thinking that thoughts about her were painful. DIdn't work, if anything, possibly main the painful association worse. Like my mind was going mad, wouldn't stop thinking about this girl. Eventually the painfulness of it started to go, but still think about her at least once a week, 6 years on.

Young love is the best thing in the world, the excitement, the novelty, the wild emotions, the unimaginable feelings of love, the experimenting, the innocence. But shit it stings when you're an emotionally crippled Sup Forumstard who'd been on Sup Forums since 2005 and didn't know how to play it cool.

27, biscum, only been with men

Women are difficult because they have dicks thrown at them all day. Should I ever go out of my way to get with one?

It's not all bad, just don't make promises you can't keep.

Feels bad, man..

Post pic of yourself faggot
I've lived with 2 kissless 24 year old virgins, dressed them up better, got them drunk, and got them ALL laid within the month. One guy is a pimply ginger, the other looks like one of the columbine shooters.
I'll give tips.

how old are you bro ?

>16
>kisless

...

>inb4 banned for 2 years
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEE NO YOU FUCKING NORMIES I WANT TO BE A WIZARD

Tell her.

MODS MODS MODS

...

DID YOU GET THAT OFF OF KIKEBOOK FUCKING NEWFAG?

Listen, all you have to do is fix yourself up and go on a dating website. Get a date with a fugly, go on it.

At the end of the first date just kiss her on the cheek. After 2nd date go for the full kiss.

done.

24 kissless virgin here.

Wizardry soon.

I found her instagram a while ago, she'd put a massive amount of effort into gyming. Now she's pretty fit, 6 pack, toned, firm butt, that sorta thing.
Looks like she's hanging out with some really strong good looking guys.
And I know that I've now got a lot more going for me than back then, but I don't think she'd be interested in what I'm selling.
Then last year I was back in our little home town for Christmas and she must have been as well because we matched on tinder. First time we'd spoke to eachother in 5 odd years. We exchanged pleasantries, explained where we are. She's doing her PhD in vet studies like she'd always dreamed, I told her what I was doing. Depressingly stale conversation for what was possibly the most defining relationship of my teenage life. I gave her my number, she replied with hers which I found weird. I still remembered it off by heart, but I didn't tell her that.
Now I live in a different country, I imagine I'll probably never see her again in my life.

Wait, oh shit. YOU'RE A FUCKING NON-WHITE AREN'T YOU?

Whiter than snow son. Born and bred NZ fag.

>15
>driving unassisted
I smell bullshit m8

no
had it saved from a shitty baww thread about 4-5 years ago

>Be me
>Be 15
>6,5/10 grilk wants a goodbye hug
>Confused but okey
>She has 9/10 body
>Tells me to grab her ass
>lol what? Still does it because why not
>RKOs me with a kiss
>Make out for about 3min
>Confused.jpg
>She later sends nudes
>Feel full of win

Horrible greentext but it's been a few years

Oh, well GG mate. It doesn't look like you'll spend your life with her unless you make some sacrifices.

>mfw you will never experience young love

You could get your learners here in NZ at 15, I used to know the local cop really well because I was friends with his son and worked for his daughter in law. I knew when it was his shift off and when the town had no cop for the night, would drive by myself then.

Oh, well have a pepe then.

Criminal scum

Thank you. Have one of my oldest memes, from 2007

Any rare merchants?

You have committed crimes against NZ and her people, what do you say in your defence?

>Driving
>15
Uwot?

nigga if he's 14 how is it wrong sure its weird but its not wrong because he's 14. Hell when i was 15 i fucked a 13 year old

>resist arrest

DUDE you're only twenty chill the fuck out hahaha

GTFO newfag

>Get your hand off my penis

>a ball
what the fuck is that she went to like a baseball lol fuckwit

youtube.com/watch?v=FbaoXPrcPWI

Have it your way

>had sex
>HAD SEX AT 15
NEWFAAAAAAAAAA-
REEEEEEE GET OUT PEDOS

Like the school ball I don't know what you amerifats call it, prom maybe?

Only 17 can I still be saved?

>prom
what the fuck are you talking and im not even from america faggot just kys

...

Honestly you all should have gotten some in middle or high school. That's when it's easiest.

I got my first in the 7th grade because both me and the unlucky lady were very insecure about ourselves. Pretty normal first kiss tbh

how the fuck is that pedo if hes underage too? do you even know the definition you retarded faggot

lol wtf's wrong with you mate, how autism are ya when you don't know what a prom is? You from fuckin Russia?

>why am I a virgin?

You're trying too hard newfriend

Kissless, handheldless, dateless 34 y/o wizard reporting in

I'm 34 already

wtf is wrong with you, most 13 year olds don't even look fuckable, they just look like a child

Epic fail guy

I'm rule 34 already

>Russia
LOL you must have fucking autism Russia has been wiped off the face of the since 2044 lol what the fuck are you a historian fucking please just die

Hmm. I still don't like it, but I guess I'll overlook it. This time.

There are no Chads here. Just a pathetic kissless virgin in his mid 30s and slightly less pathetic beta fags

You are now fuck off to r9k you gigantic fucking cocksucking retard.

At this point you should just invest in travel or fleshlights rather than waste any more effort on the alternative

you're talking literally or like, never has anyone willingly did that with you, only prostitutes?

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You excited for another year in the special ed room, boomer?

Oh, shit. Dubs don't lie, this settles the argument you nigger

she didn't , she looked 15 and anyways whats the big fucking deal anyways a girl now a 15 would date a 20 year old now so why cant i fuck a 13 year old if i was 15. It wasnt illegal so therefore its not wrong

OY GOY

I never wasted any effort on that matter. Probably that is why I'm virgin.

I'm talking literally. I never had sex and most probably never will. Prostitution is legal in my country btw.

>It wasnt illegal so therefore its not wrong
fucking statists
that being said I dont think it was wrong either

>anyways a girl now a 15 would date a 20 year old now

Possibly.

See a prostitute if you don't get laid until 19 to avoid autism. Trust me on that.

Wow im 15 and never even held a girls hand and definitely have not kissed one. Im probably 7/10 or 8/10 on looks, i play football, but I'm just an awkward cunt and my personality has been ruined by ifunny.

>15
mooodss modddss

>15
>tfw these retards get themselves banned

See you in 3 years fag

im 15 and fingered 2 girls so :v its not bad i think