In supermarket

in supermarket
see this
wat do?

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youtu.be/KKnjbOlGbDo
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Grab some boston red leaf lettuce. Much better than iceberg lettuce in salads.

straighten her neck and tell her to go to a orthopaedist

Capture; use as rape-slave.

Which one is that? I've been looking to replace the iceberg but I haven't found any decent replacement yet.

What should you have done in 2014 when this picture actually made currents? Murdered her to stop her violating everyone's ears with her filth.

fukin get her a tub of protein and tell her to work legs and glutes

Excuse me, Miss. Do you work here?

chloryform her then fuck in toilets with a fat shit

If your grocer has it, it just says boston red leaf or boston green leaf lettuce. It's a heavier more flavorful leaf than iceberg, but much less crunchy. It also doesn't have the slight paper-like toughness of romaine lettuce.

Another good option is beet greens if they have it.

Cuck myself

Those are nice carrots, I would buy them.

Move her out of the way so i can grab my activated almonds

Ask for a quick selfie to make girls jealous, say thanks and continue shopping. I'm a busy person too, user. But even I have a few minutes to troll people.

Count the lines of her shirt.

grab same shit she is going to grab - hand contact - little flirt - relationship - break up with her - getting my own song written by her - profit?

Keep fucking shopping.
What am I supposed to do? Beat her over the head and fuck her in the store?
Desperately assert myself into her life with contrived conversation so I can shove my face into her face long enough for her evolutionary biology kicks in and begins to subconsciously desire me for mating because of my demonstrated ability to "do things" thereby implying an innate ability to protect her from mega-fauna?

Pretty normal reaction. You disgust me.

No, you're suppose to do either or follow her from about half an aisle away, then get in the same line as her and make conversation while waiting in line. Also snap a pic of her ass if she bends over at any point.

Think to self
Huh that's funny she's pretending she has to be here.

Say, "Hey I never listen to your music, but I recognize you, are you....?"

Her: "*Scoff* Yeah, thanks, it's cool...I am"

Me: "So great to meet you, are you making anything good for dinner tonight?"

Her: "Nah, just shopping for some snacks, I usually don't cook"

Me: "Oh cool, well, if you aren't busy later you want to cook some dinner? I can teach you some easy and healthy recipes..."

Her: "I don't think so, I'm always busy, plus we just met"

Me: "Yeah for sure, no worries, perhaps we can start off with something easier? How about I take you to dinner Thursday night?"

Her: "I am actually off that night, but I usually just decompress and I hate going on dates, they're so energy-consuming..."

Me: "I totally get that, well the goal here is to eat some good food and just relax...meet someone new etc., you never know maybe it'll be nice?"

Her: "Fine, that does sound kind of good, where are we going?"

Me: "Well here's my phone, why don't you give me your number and we can figure it out later, I promise I won't post it to Sup Forums"

Her: "Oh god, are you a fucking b-tard? If I find my number on there I swear I'll castrate you"

Me: "It's all safe with me, T, thanks - will be in touch"

Her: "Bye user"

Me: "You're just delaying the inevitable."

Her: "Leave me alone."

Me: "The fappening is a-happening."

Her: "Please stop."

Me: *faps*

Her: runs

We: *fap*

screenshot made for cringe threads. Thanks for some amazing cringe oc

Wait for her to give me an excruciating lecture on veganism as I parade around with a beef steak in my trolley

>follow
>rape
>give her a new terrible song to "write"
>???
>profit

...

"this"

Yet another example of Sup Forums acting like women aren't even human. Good job OP. This site makes me FUCKING sick...

holy fucking shit dude

just wow

>he thinks "this" is referring to the lady in the picture

Yet another example of an SJW acting like women aren't even human. Good job. This reply makes me FUCKING sick...

Oh my god. The autism if you think this is how that would go down.

...

Look for romain lettuce. I love this stuff.

Vinaigrette: 1 tablespoon olive oil, 1 tablespoon pumpkinseed oil, 2 tablespoons balsamico vinegar, 1 teaspoon honey, 1 teaspoon mustard, salt, pepper.

>Desperately assert myself into her life with contrived conversation so I can shove my face into her face long enough for her evolutionary biology kicks in and begins to subconsciously desire me for mating because of my demonstrated ability to "do things" thereby implying an innate ability to protect her from mega-fauna?
Best description of flirting ever.

You guys are just jealous because you know it would work and you didn't think of it - plus you don't have my experience either...which includes speaking to famous women celebrities in NYC at random spots.

Enjoy mom's basement you fegs

I'd ask her what she's listening too, then tell her she has poor taste in music.

Also tell her she'll be forgotten in 30 years because her music is shit.

muchedge

Me: "Hey, you kinda look like a young, skinny Kim Bassinger!"

Her: "Um, thanks."

>awkward silence

Me: "Well, have a nice day!

>Me: "Oh cool, well, if you aren't busy later you want to cook some dinner?
Wtf man

youtu.be/KKnjbOlGbDo

Hey this post is already in a cringe thread

How do you write women so well? Teach me more

Has no ass. Do nothing

>see her shopping
>look behind me
>notice time machine that took me back to 2014
>get back in time machine
>go to Germany in 1932
>assassinate Hitler on his way to parliament
>become hero

Thanks, OP
You're a pretty cool guy

" Hey honey you're not ripening anything with your gaze, grab an go. "

slap her ass (if I manage to find it)

>I can teach you some easy and healthy recipes

Smooth user

Post a picture of yourself with timestamp Romeo.

This guy getsmn it i dont mess around in the flatland

This bitch hasn't bought a grocery her entire life. Get real, nigga.

why did someone shop her ass away?

She shopped her ass off!
Haaaaaa hahahahahahaha!
Get it?

mate u forgot to offer her a bowl of eggs, thats why she didnt want to hang out with u straight away

Hahahaha this is a good kek good moves user keep it up I'm proud of you

Error 404

Nah, this guy's never even heard of Omegle. Fantasyland script at it's finest...for what that's worth.

All in all besides the fact that she has no ass, shes got on some headphones, when i have on my headphones i dont wanna be spoken to.

...

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA OG THANKS FOR THE TOP QUALITY JOKES user I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU TYPED UP SUCH A QUALITY JOKE TRULY GREAT STUFF. YOU'RE SO FUCKING HILARIOUS. OMG HAHAHAHAHAHAHA THAT WAS QUITE LITERALLY THE BEST JOKE I'VE EVER HEARD IN MY FUCKING LIFE AGAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA OH PLEASE SOMEONE STOP THE LAFFS MY SIDES ARE JUST IN ORBIT AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....

What the fuck? Why the hell would you not join forces with Hitler, give him advise on how to win the war, become second in command, then become the Fucking Fuehrer of the fucking German empire. Then proceed to rule all of Europe, and while you're at it, you might as well exterminate all blacks and muslims.

:DDD

i'd behave exactly as I would if she were anybody else. Because she is lie anybody else. She just sings for a living and makes a lot of money. So I'd bless her with my obliviousness to her as I continued shopping and left her in peace without interruption from me.

>approach with the confidence of an assassin.
>stare her down intensely.
>pull out bowl of eggs and go to give to her.
>be tazed by security immediately.
>whimper "all of them" while defecating yourself.
>go home to post MGTOW thread on /r9k/

-Hitler there's a half jew man called einstein he has the knowledge to develop a bomb that will make you win the war
-Wtf are you some kind of pro jew?
To the showers!!!

thats how i would do it, nothing more smooth then that, and if she doesnt like it, its not my fault

>mfw op blocked out the "Whole Foods" label on the basket

OP you colossal fucking faggot.

And, when speaking to her, attempt to achieve the level of supreme bullshitting accomplished in that post?

fucking tie a sturdy stick to each one of her legs so they dont fucking break in half

Hitler did nothing wrong

War on two fronts leading to defeat.

Do a 360 and run at full speed away.

Ask her what she's gonna make, make, make.

And ask her if like any good woman can she bake, bake, bake.

Cause it's not like I'll ever see her again, being a foreigner and all.

Are you the original poster of

HAHAHAAHAH top kek!!!!

This has to be bait. please

Buy a carrot and some oil

Wut

look for someone with a less flat ass, like any 8 year old boy

walk up to her, grab her by her hair, push her body down forcefully, and anally rape her while her face is buried deep in the veggies.

There, I said, NOW STOP SPAMMING THIS SHIT THREAD

winner

offer to buy her an ass

Inb4 I'm ten and I listen to real music

Tell that tranny he's no fooling anyone.

>bowl of eggs
The memes

>The memes
>memes
>MEMES
memes