Can we just be miserable in here? Fuck life

Can we just be miserable in here? Fuck life.

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sumn on your mind, OP?

Just pissed off with pointless shit. Hoping other people are too. Long story short on my end: Hate myself, feel like a monster and a robot.l, life feels pointless, etc.

You're posting in the dumpster of the internet.

How can you expect to be not depressed?

tru


Monster? Robot i get and monster I do to, but what makes you feel this way?

1) dumpster is where I want to be
2) I want depressed people to help me realize that the world isn't perfect and that there are other people out there that are hurting (hate themselves, want to die) because that's the best I can do

I'm failing most of my classes, I lost my laptop and I am being transferred to a boarding school with none of my freinds. Life's all fucking dandy for me, how bout you OP?

perfect spot, dog..................

Yea I'm depressed as well user. These pills aren't helping. Neither is alcohol. Even tried habging myself today but the rope snapped and I landed on my ankle wrong and rolled it...

>miserable
That's why Ive been taking Hydrocodone every 2 hours for the last 6.

Every social situations feels incredibly difficult and weird. I don't understand people, love is confusing on a basic level. Even touching people isnjust, strange. I feel like I'm trying to calculate what to say in any given situation and I just don't understand how people can just live without even thinking about it. Friends come easy, love just happens talking is simple! And I'm over hear trying to come up with the best possible/optimal thing to say. Meanwhile I feel like a actually don't care one way or another about people. If my family died tomorrow I'm not even sure I'd feel anything. Hence the robot.

That sounds like a pretty miserable existence OP. Yes, the world is full of shitty things. But if you focus to much on them, it will devour you from the inside out.

Enjoy your short existence while you can. Just think, you hit the fucking jackpot of all of the things you could have become. You're a human, you have access to a computer, you weren't aborted or are in a shitty location (more than likely).

Not OP but I'm in a similar situation. I didn't do to well my first year in college and now I'm having issues with the fucking transcript. Jesus fuck if I can't go to college this fall it will be devastating.

dude I feel this.

I do that all the time.
I literally analyze everything that I say and everything others say.
pretty consuming if u let it be.

just try to forget about it and go to sleep. :)

sorry you're feeling shitty.

I'm not in a shit location but. And please people give me your crappie life stories because I hate mine. My mom was murdered in cold blood. I've only known my dad for a few years. I've never met my brother. Forster care sucked dick. And growing up in was taught Christian ideals which means repress fucking EVERYTHING. Like some chick? Repress it. Have a bad thought? Shove it down. My mom used to hide in a room with other adults and that was just normal to me. Growing up switching schools and trying so hard to meet people but as soon as I had a friend BAM moving again. And all the while she's in a room shooting up meth. But that's what adults do right? That's normal? Oh you're fucking stupid now because of all the private school moving around. And all the friends you didn't get to make? Too bad man, life starts here. Oh you're emotionally stunted? Fuck off, Africa kids have it worse than you. Why can't I just feel like shit for one night!? Why do I have to be fine? Why do I need to make everyone happy despite hating myself so much. I asked to see a counselor once. I didn't want a pastor. But that's what I got. Oh God will take care of that don't worry man. Oh will he? He hasn't fucking yet!! And I don't even know if he exists! Yay and now I'm feeling sorry for myself, and everyone hates me for it
Oh well.

Thanks, I like meeting other people who feel this way, it makes me feel less like an alien. I just want to complain for once yknow?

But thanks, I appreciate it :)

many many peepl here who will coroborrate your feelings

Have you gone to a therapist or do you have a close family member or friend?

Shit son I've been through some rough times but you're on a whole other level. I'd try talking to someone about it since honestly it has helped me out greatly in the past.

The feel is strong with this one
Brother, I grew up in a Christian family where my late rd were super controlling and crammed Christian ideals down my throat. I had to bottle up everything and when I couldn't keep the cap on it just went downhill. My parents isolated and ignored me over my two star children of siblings. All I have is that you gotta occupy yourself with something you love, go out to new places, if possible, start a new life elsewhere in the world. You are human after all, try to enjoy your time on this planet before the timer runs out. Good luck OP, I wish for the best for you.

Good! We honestly need this place to not feel like outcasts I think.

I had an emotional breakdown in front of.my friends and I still don't think they understand what it means to feel this way. If this is the only way to find people that understand, so be it. I just need to let it all out randomly with no consequence. I need some fake Internet friends for just a se8ond who get it. Who also want to die. Who don't understand. Who feel like outcasts that accidently made it out and are still alive

I broke down In front of my grandpa and eased with him that I needed to see someone. He took my back to the church to see a pastor. And his every answer was God will find a way and it honestly didn't help at all. I just feel so broken and shitty all the time. I want to find a therapist bit aren't they expensive? I got some money when my mom got murdered but I'm sick of getting dicked around

they might understand,
but honestly if they r dudes they r probably full of ego and pride and dont want to show u they know what u feel like.

Yeah fuck that guy. Pastors are supposed to be leaders to their followers and give helpful life advice. Not religious but when I was my pastor was quite insightful.

I couldn't tell you honestly about the prices since I know jack shit. But I think it will help you tremendously.

Thanks it honestly means a lot that someone went though the same things. I want to be creative but now I hate myself so much that it becomes hard not to stop doing the things I love. I want to make movies actually. But everyone doubts me. They think I can't do it, they want me to do something 'useful' and now I'm not sure I can do it. Like why couldn't I have wanted to be a doctor?! Why does it have to film?! I hinsetly feel like my brain and body wants to make it as hard as possible to be alive. And I'm sorry if that's pathetic and dumb but, that how I feel.

I think he tried to help. He gave me some insights like how my mom and whatever boyfriend was out of jail at the time (there were like 6) were yelling all the time and I screamed at them to please stop when I was seven or so maybe translated into me thinking that people, even random strangers, and the 4cham randos, hate me no matter what I do. But it always lead back to God. He gave me a paper about God and why He does what HE does but, it didn't really help much. Seeing as how, if He's even real, He's not gonna do jack shit about my problems cause he's God yknow? Got bigger problems than me..

I have been diagnosed with Schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, depersonalisation, severe depression, ADHD(if it really exists)

It is particularly lulzy to be living in the folded universe my brain has designed. Oh well hopefully I won't be living too long lol.

Does life feel meaningless? Or does your brain give you weird, shitty, fucked up goals? Or can I ask that? Either way. I'm sorry...life sucks we can only live the way we do...

It's so much easier to watch TV and movies cause at least they make some sort of sense. Real life tho? Complete nonsense.

Hey op don't worry I'm in the same boat. Haven't been able to sleep for the past couple months.... My parents are literally driving me crazy, haven't been able to get laid either I'm so fucking depressed I'm ready to kill myself. Just keep your head up op shit will get better. (Eventually)

Thanks person, I don't want to die/but I totally do too. I just want the pain to stop mostly. I feel like love is a farce. It doesn't exist, I'll never find that 'fish' they keep talking about. Not to mention I'm throwing life away to make movies like an ass. And people are mad at me because of it.

The thing is, I really couldn't give a shit about what happens in my entire life at all. If I go through my entire life without knowing a single female I don't care.

If I end up NEET living with my parents at the age of 60 playing games 24/7 it would never bother me in the slightest.

If I found out I was going to die tomorrow it wouldn't bother me.

I think that is the main difference with me and normal people. I just don't care.

I also feel no love at all, not even with my parents. I have no idea what I am missing out on

>The thing is, I really couldn't give a shit about what happens in my entire life at all. If I go through my entire life without knowing a single female I don't care.

>If I end up NEET living with my parents at the age of 60 playing games 24/7 it would never bother me in the slightest.

>If I found out I was going to die tomorrow it wouldn't bother me.

>I think that is the main difference with me and normal people. I just don't care.

>I also feel no love at all, not even with my parents. I have no idea what I am missing out on
I honestly feel you. I'm the same way, imposter syndrome. No matter who my friends are they hate me. Then I met this girl. She's married and I can't be with her ever but, she exudes this light. It permeates through her very being alive, she's so happy. And that drew me to her, but she's ten years older than me. And married and has two kids. Do I have a mommy clean cause mine died? Do I just want to feel coddled and loved by someone one more time. Is that juvenile? Is that wrong? I don't know and it scares me.

I totally understand. I have been trying to find the right "fish in the sea" to escape reality but it's never going to happen.. Every single day I think about love I miss it so much. I hope you find that fish and when you do take care of her. This world is so fucked up everyone/everything is all about control. I'm so miserable I just want the pain to stop. All I do is watch movies play games work and chill with my homies. But when it comes to love NOPE. Nobody gives a shit not even my parents. I also owe about 1000$ to my grandma I've been working on that.

I totally understand that 'fuck the world' attitude has all the time. I get it and I feel it a lot. But is it okay for me to admit that I just want to feel loved unconditionally? It's not about the pussy...i dint give a FUCK about that. I just want to feel like this are okay for once In my life. Is that okay? Can I break down crying in front of my friend even though I'm a guy? Or am I gay now? People think I'm gay bit I'm not. People don't know she's dead...I'm just so sad and I can't talk about it unless alcohol because I might 'hurt someone's feelings' but it only builds until I can't control myself. And then when I do drive I get so sad and miserable and can't stop gunshing firth these feelings that other guys make me feel like shit for feeling

I'll never be treated like a normal human being. I wish my parents raised me better so I can be accustomed to normal everyday social interactions. But instead, Im this awkward mess of a human being who cant even look people in the eye and try to spit out a response or something that can be a decent conversation that doesn't die out in less than 10 seconds. Nowadays I cannot even show my face to my roomates for this reason. Im a fucking braindead lifeless zombie who just keeps feeding my need for alcohol and weed. Maybe sleeping pills if I really want to get loaded.

I want to fucking die but whats keeping me from killing myself is watching society slowly burn. I want to see shit fall apart in this country and maybe the world as a whole for what it is turning into now.

Not really depressed right now but I'm fucking livid. Heard about those 4 chav cunts who strung up some poor family's cat and beat it to death. Just reading the article interview with the owner woman was heartbreaking. I'm not a bonglander but if I were anywhere near Derbyshire I'd stalk the fucking place with a crowbar like a ghost and would leave their them bleeding out in the park.

Me too. I'm literally a lifeless zombie-robot. Weed alachol and cigarettes barley help :( I can't even feel anything anymore.

I live like 2 hours away from Derbyshire. I fucking hate chavs so damn much.

What also pisses me off is that this early morning there was a doxx thread on Sup Forums to dig up all kinds of information the authorities (and helpful vigilantes) and it was full of newfag "Not your personal army" and "you're breaking the rules!!1". Since when has that applied to raids done on animal abusers? Nobody remembers Kenny Glenn and Dusty it seems.

If any rules or law prevents you from doing the right thing, then it MUST be broken, end of.

This thread is about being honest, and not about lying like I feel some threads are about. I get an amount of Shudephrode (can't spell right now but German word for happiness in others pain) when my friends or the world goes through shit. It's like 'yay people aren't lying themselves for once!" And then I go back to the 'I love her but she's ten years older and married' aruegemnet with myself (and fuck you it's not about the pussy I don't care about sex I just want to feel loved) and I feel like shit again.

>26
>living with mom
>shit car
>house is shit (like literally falling apart)
>dead end job that just recently cut my hours
>friends are all either starting families, or worse than I
>nothing to look forward to

Reporting in.

Take a tire iron or hammer and go find these cunts and give them a thrashing for me. I'll pay for proof of pulverised fingers and teeth.

Dude I feel you. To be honest I see people living life normally and all I can honestly think is "fuck you for.being normal" and I try not to cry into my own hands, despite being a man and apparently unappreciated.

Shit man thanks for making me feel better about my life

I'd be fine with that user. Nothing wrong with that to me.

Damn, man.

Did they not get caught?

>tired of neet basement life after only 2 years
>get job at half decent fast food place
>back and neck pain problems start to get severe, beg my mom to help me get medical help even though she's been ignoring it for years
>turns out i have hereditary arthritis or some bullshit that passed over her and onto me and its been left unknown and untreated since i was 13
>have to quit job and lay in my bed all day barely conscious on pain meds

Oh, and she still doesn't love me.

Anytime man, had a 19 year old sex goddess on my dick for about 4 months last year to top it off.

She left me for a guy who hasn't worked a day in his life, who also owns a 2014 M5 BMW, and whose parents just bought him a 750k beach house in my town... all that shit in his name.

and

I could go on...

Same. Probably because I've been hit with so much negative emotion and thought to the point where emotion doesn't affect me nearly as much as it used to, if not, at all. My thought process is so fucked and I try to fight it to act "normal". But it just doesn't work anymore. I hate the people who say they are "awakened" and shit to.

Whenever I see a happy couple holding hands/kissing it tears me apart. Whenever kids smile at me or try and make my day better I can feel my heart explode it makes me want to cry but I can't.

Me too. I fight to stay normal every day it's terrible. I'm so fucked.

My thoughts exactly. The girl I love just left me because she's afraid to hurt me in the future. I still don't understand

I'm so sorry. If it makes you.feel better im op so
> dead mom who literally got off meth and then died due to fuck face asshole piece of shot Boyfriend
Just met dad a while ago, he yelled ate for being 'fake nice' it was just Mr trying to pretend like life was okay
>tried to pay for college with dead mom money but felt like shit and couldn't do it
>quit college and not everyone makes me.feel link shit because of it
>gets job at a place (don't want to oust myself because I'm that paranoid someone will find out)
>perfect girl, but married and ten years older. Do I have a mommy complex? Honestly? I might now.....she's so amazing though, but she'd married
> wants to movies and shit bit nobody be lives he can
>people keep pressuring tk get girlfriend
>want actually meaningful relationship but can't tell people life story
>everyone thinks I'm fine. Am damn near suicidal
>always have been
>nobody would ever know
>am fine with that because why do I have to be perfect?
>am sorry cause shitty and drunk, that's the only way to let people know how much I hate nye self

Im complaining. There are people that have It so much worse than me. You guys are great though, because you're letting it out. Fuck life it sucks, it's confusing and weird, maybe I'll (we'll) never feel the love that we want (need) and no that's not okay. It sucks, it's terrible, it's so fucking shitty that we have ever right to complain. We might not get what we need but at least we can yell here and make our frustrations known. Nobody knows who you are. You might be Christian and can yell FUCK YOU Life.at the top of your Lungs, and that's okay.

Hey op don't worry I'm fucked up too.

I'm starting my second year of college in a week. I withdrew last semester because I had a complete mental breakdown after years of depression and I had totally given up on my classes. I hate being there because it's fucking 2000 miles away and I'd rather just stay at home and drive around and hang out with my friends because that's the only way I can keep my depression under control. At the same time, though, I know that if I say fuck it and transfer out of the school I'm at right now, I'll just feel constantly guilty and all my friends will see me as a failure in one way or another.

On top of all this I'm fucking neck deep in the friendzone with this one girl. She's probably my favorite person in the world and I'm one of her favorite people in the world, but I know I'm just like a brother to her. I had never really hung out with girls until like a year ago (when I started hanging out with her), so I'm super inexperienced with girls and I just don't know what I'm doing wrong. I always say the right things around her and I always know how to make her laugh, but I have no idea how to make her realize how into her I am. There's some mega-douche that sometimes hangs out with us and she keeps going home with him, and he just makes it seem so easy. How can I be such a likable person but at the same time be so uninteresting sexually/romantically? I just wish I was the least bit attractive. I'm a fucking manlet with these big goofy eyebrows that make me look angry and creepy. Sometimes I feel like my appearance alone is everything that's holding me back, but then I see a bunch of butt ugly dudes on campus fucking making out with 9/10's and then I feel like it's just my shitty personality.

Sorry for this fucking unreadable wall of text, I just needed to vent.

shes already cheating.

i dont blame her

They're "investigating", which is to say lots of hot air on facebook and nothing done as far as I know.

Take the law into your own hands and beat them to death in public. If they won't listen to reason, they'll listen to violence. It works for countries, it'll work for individuals.

go back to fucking twitter y ou HURR DURR Sup ForumsROTHERS we arent your friends or family. eat shit.

youtube.com/watch?v=ommznPY-DIw&list=PLqRZrHgbTNmhN8iOza7LSfRu7dSqdq2Dt&index=6

me neither, I'd do the same if I was a girl


hell, if I was a girl with the same aesthetic value I have as a man - I'd probably be in the fucking Bahamas on a yacht with some guy 10 years my senior who caters to my every need

but alas I'm this sick hybrid of a worthless man and a boy who never grew up

Choose to heal yourself with psychedelics or fuck off.

I'm glad you don't feel like a piece of shit! Embrace it! Live a normal fucking life man, but there are broken people In the world. And it's nice to have solace and not feel like the only worthless human being alive. I'm not asking you to leave and I'm not demanding anything of you (this is a chan I literally can) I'm just saying..enjoy life where you.do the feel like a weird outcast who needs to die because everything about you is wrong! Like, woo! You won!

And to be honest, I'm a closeted Christian there needs to sat fuck shit damn, the world is a fire that needs to end, and kick the shit out of nuts. Does it make sense? No not at all. But this is what happens when you repress your emotions. I don't think it's healthy. At all. I just don't know anything about the world to he perfectly honest, other than right now I fucking hate it!

My depression and social anxiety keep me in shitty jobs.
I don't have the self confidence to even try for a better job any more; I feel like I don't deserve to be happy...

this life is sink or swim. dont expect me to look down over you as i charge on into the future

I lived like a fucking hermit last semester. I had no roommate so I'd just stay up as long as I felt like then sleep as long as I felt like. Wake up, watch netflix for 12 hours, jack off, that's my whole fucking day. Sometimes I'd be up for like 26 hours and then I'd sleep for like 15 hours. Sometimes I'd go like 5 days without seeing daylight. Sometimes I'd be up for like 24 hours and I'd lie down to go to sleep and I still wouldn't be able to sleep. Whenever I would close my eyes my mind would only race faster and I'd just get more worried about everything and no matter how tired I was I'd be fucking wide awake. The hours would tick by but I would still be completely alert with no hope of relaxing. Sometimes I would start breathing heavy and my eyes would start darting around the room and I'd get extremely tense in my stomach and I would want to just get a knife and stab myself in the stomach to end the horrible feeling but since I couldn't do that I would just start crying and punching the wall and shit. A lot of times I would want to yell but I didn't want my neighbors to hear it. I rarely used my voice at all, sometimes I would go almost a whole week without saying a single word. I'd get out of my fucking disaster of a dorm and make the walk to the store 500 feet away to buy food to keep myself alive, and that was the extent of my outdoor activity/human interaction for weeks. Just endless hours shut up in my room doing stupid shit on this very computer, instead of going to class like I was supposed to be doing. One day I had a final for a class I had only attended twice, so I just took a triple dose of nyquil and knocked myself the fuck out in the middle of the day. I want this semester to go better but in the very back of my mind I just know that it's all going to go completely awry again and my parents are going to be disappointed again.

You don't have to read this, I just feel like I need to get this off my chest.

...

Sure! That's evolution. That's how it works: sink or swim. But every once in a while a fish gets wasted and retells it's feelings in an attempt to connect with other fish that feel the same way because it hates itself. I'm not saying it matters to you one way or another and it shouldn't, your life is probably great! Or at least I hope it is! But for the rest of us it's either a) kill ourselves (which I've answered fuck no because what if he'll exists?) Or b) seek or others who feel the same. Obviously I went for option B

you will never rehabilitate. you had your chance, you blew it.

i dont care if hell exists and i dont care if you exist.

i struggled and fought for years on end and built a life for myself. its not in my interest if anyone cares. because they never will.

that reverse psych

I totally understand! It took a bottle of whiskey for me to finally admit something was wrong. Otherwise yah. Existential crisis and pain for me. All alone wishing I would just keel over and died. But it hasn't happened yet, and now there's this girl and she's all of want to talk about. Is it here or just the semblance of her seemingly normal life? Idk but it hurts either way. So I totally feel you.

thats a fucking fact. this isnt constructive criticism. the more you fuck your life off the better the chance the rest of us have

you had your chance, you blew it
out of sight, out of mind

AND UNFORTUNATELY fuckers like you who like to chase people down the rabbit hole because words do hurt

That's fine. I respect it. I thought the same thing thing for a while. But it took alcohol for me to realize that deep down subconsciously, I do care, even if I wish I didn't. I respect you and envy you. If I could live life without giving a fuck I'd be so happy. But I can't, I've tried, but that doesn't work for me. So I'm happy (even if this is a twisted way to think) that there are others that might be feeling the same way..I'm not asking for you to get it. I'm so happy for you! Don't ever give a shit what others thinks, if that's how you can live than I'm glad there are normal people out there that cna come here and just shit post. But I feel legitimately broken, and I want to talk to others that feel the same

yeah there isnt enough food or resources for meaningless existence anymore. in 50 years life will give way to mega corporations because people value profits more than childeren.

thanks man

I'm an outsider just stating what I saw. I myself, not , have fucked off in life enough to know that what you say is (a partial) truth.

What a lot of people won't tell you is that you can work your ass off for something and still fail.

The supposed idiot who cheated off your tests in high school/college will probably get a better job than you, have a better looking spouse, and more beautiful/acknowledged kids.

Most of your most important dreams, regardless of how achievable they may seem, will probably never come to fruition.

and the list goes on

many get fucked, and it rarely has anything to do with effort given

ive been to jail. ive been down, ive seen bad things happen to bad people.ive held people while they pass. but i still made it through three years probation without a single violation. life can change in the blink of an eye but always remember that nobody is against you, theyre for themselves. my girlfriends mom past recently and i had to help a family grieve in a fancy room over a dead fucking body. EVERYONE HAS HARD TIMES. just becase you whine louder doesnt make your problems prevelant. and some sympathetic voice over the internet while only solidify your belief in the fact you have shelter here.

EAT
SHIT
THIS IS Sup Forums

there will always be somone better then you at something for no good reason and thats part of life

life works in cycles and if you cant accept that then you need to give up your space

I wish my sisters gave more then a passing fuck about me . Family is everything to me and it eats at me that my son doesn't even really know them. They're too busy to give a shit. I tried planning scheduled gang outs and they just couldn't be bothered .So I've just given up on them. We never grew up together so we've never been really close . I've travelled so many miles to try have some kind of relationship with them and in the end it didn't mean anything . It saddens me ..... The possibilities .....The time we could of spent together . I don't really tell anyone about this shit because Im tired of giving shits. Fuck

Good! Post this shit! I garentuee we don't take about this In our normal lives! Why?
These are my reasons
>I'm a man
> people have it worse than me
>love exists plenty of fish
>I need to be happy for everyone else
>Christianity

But bottling emotions is NOT healthy! I did it for years and it FUCKED ME UP! We've all been through shit. It's not a dick measuring contest. It's not manly to pretend profoundly fucked up shit is fine, and it's not a dick measuring contest.

The interest exists. I feel like shit, always do. And I want to talk to people that feel the same. Continue to insight thst I'm a pussy for feeling like this, it honestly helps, but eventing else helps too. So for once I'm not gonna stop complaining. Life Fucking Sucks and I'm sick and tired of just 'dealing with it' by myself.

you realize this is the same guy right

sounds like social anxiety or autism

I don't bottle it up I just don't have the energy to express it in real life anymore. They know and if they don't by know the there's nothing I can do anyway. I love them they're young and they're living life and I get it , I just know someday I'm going to be old and the life I wish we could of had will be nothing but the dream of a foolish brother .

I That really sucks. I've got the problem in that I feel like an imposter with my family. Like I'm not supposed to be there and it would be better if I just want there. Even my cousins (who might as well be sisters) and my grandparents (who might as well be parents) it doesn't help that they inadvertently make me feel like a worthless failure

you care too much. you live for others not yourself. no woman should respect you

That sucks . You shouldn't keep people in your life who make you feel little like that. Even if you love them.

nobody can give you self worth

I'm op. Can I be honest? It very well may be? I might be bipolar, autistic, fucking whatever. I've never seen a therapist so it.could be the truth. And that freaks me that fuck out

Lol I'm happy it married and have been with my wife for 14 years. I'm not looking for respect . I've successful & rejected in both business & with my peers. I'm talking about the regret of not have a better relationship with my sisters .

I just got that shit talk about how you should start living your life and actually doing stuff besides sitting in your room all day and playing video games, nothing interests me, I just play games to distract myself from the existential nightmare I'm in, I sleep all the time to numb the pain from my severe crippling depression, standard broken family, fights most of the time, but great together, dad is dying from Parkinsons, I fucked up so hard with a girl I loved.. All my friends are just enjoying life while I sit here and rot, I'm scared to get a job because I'm a 21 y/o NEET, I hate socializing unless it's a close friend, I hate myself, my body, my personality, everything, I want to fucking die Sup Forums.

I've heard things about how it will get better, I don't believe it one bit, I want to kill myself so bad.

>Whenever I see w couple
Dem feels

well whatever it is i hope you can get the proper care or treatment and start a new chapter in your life that you actually want to read.

But that's every person I've ever known! Let me.try and explain it. Imagine if you were talking to anybody
>could be a parent
>friend
>best friend
>random strangers
>fictional character

Now imagine that they want to strangle you and watch the life drain from your eyes as you slowly succumb to death. Once they do this everyone you've ever known celebrates because they don't have to fucking deal with you anymore. Now imagine that they're thinking it but can't kill you because murder is illegal. So you.try and choose the perfect words and personality to try and keep people from wishing you were dead. Maybe even adapting the personality of (It's fine if they are happy. Even at the expense of my own) okay, now that's every day of your life AND NOW some woman was nice to you once. Damn it, now you're obsessed with her. And you know that all these feelings are fucked up and wrong but you can't change them because they lie In your subconscious..