Ez pz

Ez pz.

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>passing through Angmar
>passing through Siege of Erebor
>Rhovanion not under invasion
Good way to get yourself killed while taking the longer route, away from the conflicts of Rohan and Gondor that need your help.

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Why didn't the eagles fly west until they circumvented the Earth and got to Mordor? Surely Sourman wouldn't expect an attack from the east

why not a boat?

In both of these they'd have to pass hundreds of miles of enemy territory. Eagles has always been true though.

Angmar fucks your shit up.

Harad fucks your shit up.

Why didn't he just shove the ring up his ass?

>going through angmar
literally worse than sailing to gondor

>flying at 100 mph
>still has his hat on

would shoving the ring up his ass have turned him invisible?

Easiest solution. Biggest plothole ever.

Thats actually a good fucking question. Quick someone write a letter to Tolkeins grandchildren. We need to find this out.

What's so scary about Angmar?

>go north into Angmar
Haha nope. Might as well take the scenic route through Moria and visit every orc den under the Misty Mountains as long as you're being suicidal.

It's where Saurons dad used to live. Still a bit of a mess.

>hey bro welcome to Angmar, make yourself at home
>oh you won't be needing all that skin

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Really cold, really big, mountaneous, still full of orcs and 'other' creatures

is this FFVII or what

Going off the map fucks your shit up.

>get fucked by Valar

Could they have used dwarves to tunnel there?

necromancy, ice, constant blizzards, wights, witchking country

No, because it only turns you invisible when surrounding the flesh no being surrounded *by* flesh.

He could go invisible using it as a cock ring of course.

You ever play Warcraft III/WoW? You know Northrend? It's based on Angmar.

That's sound rad. All that backstory is from silmalirion right? I once began to read it but couldn't get through the valar's bullshit.

He is a wizard

I think it's Roverandom/Unfinished Tales shit, but I'm not sure.

But when his body contracts around it a bit of his intestine is bound to go in.

It comes up a bit in LotR, they even name drop it in the movies.

Inb4 flat middle earther fags

if he poops a little and the poop goes into the ring, would the poop turn invisible?

Middle earth is a discworld m8

It's best explored and fleshed out in Battle for Middle Earth 2, which is an RTS vidya game. It also features in LOTR online.

Middle Earth is flat.

Maybe he would be going in and out of invisibility as it shifts to protrude enough intestinal lining through and against the inner ring.

I think it expects more rigid flesh

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Could you go off the disc?

Nah the Eagles were under attack too, there are few of them and couldn't spare a couple

Do people need to see the ring to be jealous of it? Or would it's presence be enough? Would they crave his ass(hole)?

Why didnt he keep it in his mouth so he could stick his tongue through it when he had a sword and shield in his hands?
Would a chest hair going through the ring when worn in necklace form make you invisible?
Do hobbits even have chest hair? They have mad foot hair.

That's not a plothole, just something that didn't happen

You mean Morgoth ? He wasn't in Angmar, Angband was in Beleriand and it was drowned with the rest

Imagine meeting the fellowship and finger popping frodo then bam youre invisible.

That would make for a very awkward scene, a sodomy where the assailant goes invisible upon entry.

I think hair doesnt count cause it mustve passed in during their many tumbles.

>implying gandalf's last words weren't "fly, you fools"
>implying that didn't mean they should go north to get the eagles' help
>implying gandalf was dumb enough to actually think they could pass through the Ash Mountains

Middle Earth was made round during the downfall of Numenor. Before that, it used to be a disc, but then men fucked shit up, and Eru raised Valinor into an another dimension type of thing (hard to explain).

>lotrfags always crying about angmar fucking anything up
>literally everything i google says nothing is in angmar during the time of lotr
>LE WITCH KING OF ANGMAR
>literally isn't even fucking in angmar

Shut the fuck about Angmar. Just walk right fucking through. Nobody is there.

Smeagle elbow deep in Frodo with that ring lust

It's empty until you wake some 1rst Age semi-god creature

Given time this would work, so the need to start early. Dwarves should be very efficient though.

It's still not a plothole. It's just something they didn't happen to do

would the ringwraiths be dissuaded to take the ring when they found out its around a turd?

Sam would turn invisible

Great thread guys.

Welp, time to rewatch all 3. (not the extended shit - fucks up the pacing)

Actually that's genius. Just mine a shaft under Mordor and pop right up inside Mt.Doom.

Maybe it would turn his shit invisible.

>Ring up the ass to make invisible shits
>Shit on Sam's pillow
>Await the inevitable

I actually agree, the Eagles aren't exactly some invincible creatures, and they're easily spotted. Not to mention the Nazgul Eagle Interception System (NEIS™) is quite advanced

Could the ring be hidden effectively if you left it on a solid log of shit? It would be invisible and the smell wouldn't be pleasant.

Yeah sweet dont worry about the fucking molten lava mate

>not the extended shit

just flick the ring into the lava really fast when it burst through the ceiling and run for it

>muh eagles
That's where they were heading in the first book/film before Gandalf got dragged away by the Balrog. He even says "Fly you fools!" before he falls down.

topkek

>those big lived-in--a-cave retard hands
>that tiny hobbit asshole

Sam would need to get real good at knitting diapers. Lest they visit the spider lair early.

How much of the lava is need to melt the ring? You could make the tunnel flood slowly and then leave the ring there.

Would it be easier to steal lava from Mt. Doom and then bring it to the location of the ring?

Well thats why they went to Moria. It was they way under

I don't mean come up through the fucking volcano itself, you mong. I just mean the surrounding area. You can skip a whole lot of bullshit doing this and as long as nobody notices you (Which why would they?), you're basically going into Mordor easy mode.

Its already a suicide mission, nobody think they're coming back from this. They hit lava? Good! Getting the ring into the lave was the point, right? Good guys win!

WHY DIDN'T THEY JUST GIVE THE RING TO TOM BOMBADIL !?!?

just put a door in the tunnel

dorf doors are impermeable to liquids

Because he doesn't give a fuck about the ring. Literally, he gives no fucks about normie problems like Sauron taking over Middle Earth.

Im not sure the books and movie would have been as good if it was just the fellowship meeting and instead of doing the quest they just sent a lump of shit to the shadow realm then fucked off back home.

>mfw I'm an eternal ghost who doesn't give a shit about who rules the lands around me because they can't do shit to me

top
fucking
kek

no point. they add nothing to the viewing experience (in-fact they take away front it).

I own them and I used to think watching them was somehow better because more content. But going back and watching the original cuts was way better.

Why didnt they just go out into the ocean tie the ring to large rock and drop it? Unless orcs get a submarine and scuba gear they have no hope of ever reaching kt?

nice

>that shitty theory again

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>no closure on Saruman whatsoever
>no Mouth of Sauron scene to build tension
>better

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well if you enjoy them thats great user. i do like the mouth of sauron but its not necessary for me.

Sam doesn't post on these boards you fucking morons. You can't "BTFO" a fucking fictional character.

checked

Another simple idea, just have an eagle collect lava from Mt. Doom and bring it to the shire. Use a flock of them to increase success rate

theyre laughing at a joke, you literal autist

Sean is that you?

Try calling me an autist to my face. I fucking dare you.

I think magical fantasy nonsense dictates it needs to happen in that location.

no you'd crush me with your retard autist strength, if you can't understand jokes you probably don't feel pain either

>that writing

I didnt mean it as an insult, mate. I genuinely think you have autism as you were unable to understand that people were laughing at a joke

How many active volcanoes are there? Could it be this is just the only one?

Michael?

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Its the volcano the ring was forged in. That's why it's special.

Why didnt Sauron just drain MtDoom?

Or at least put a lock on the door