Well, Sup Forums, I'm locked in the shitter with a jammed lock, and I'm home alone for the weekend...

Well, Sup Forums, I'm locked in the shitter with a jammed lock, and I'm home alone for the weekend. Phone has 44% battery, and the closest person I know is 2 hrs away from me. Wat do?

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kick down the door you pussy

/thread

If that little lock is going to keep you trapped in there, you deserve to die in the shitter

Kick it, kick the lock, kick the door, just try your hardest and go fucking primal on that door.

Crawl under the door?

Kick the door down!

you got water what you moaning about

Door and frame are brand new, stainless steel. If I kicked it, it would probably just make a hole, and wouldn't solve anything

>home alone
>locked the toilet door so hard the lock jammed

U NIVUH GUNNA GIT ME OPEE

turn the water faucet on full and wait for the room to flood. the water pressure will break the door open and you can swim to safety. just dont forget to hold your breath

why the fuck u aint callin somebody

Use hook on back of toilet brush around the bolt and use your inner Harambe

Flush yourself down and escape through the sewers.

10/10

Well, I'm pretty much dicked, the lock is the only part of the door that's old, and the sliding mechanism is rusted closed. It's been bad for a while, give me something to do while I'm trying to open the thing.

crawl under it or climb over it

Kek

Wrong kind of brush. Only thing I have that's capable of that is a tiny ass pair of tweezers

This

Is there a window OP?

>sliding mechanism is rusted closed

you slipping up OP, if it was rusted closed you couldnt have got in there in the first place. If it was just siezed, you wouldn't have been able to lock yourself in.

Unless you are suggesting it rusted closed while you were taking a shit?

Not the gr8st of b8s m8, I r8 3/8

Too small to climb out of, and I'm 4 stories up

Pick the lock with a paperclip, duh.

Don't get me wrong, it's hard to close it, too. When it's open, the lil' slider handle thing is easy to pull, but when it's closed it's pushed against the metal loop holding the lock itself, and I can't get a good grip on it to open it up.

>Tl;dr: Shit's easy to close but not open

It's not that kind of lock, retard.

Toothbrush & toothpaste to scrub the lock and remove rust & gunk from as much of the lock as you can reach.

Rubbing alchohol poured over to remove some rust in unreachable spots.

Alternatively, use tweezers to wedge between door and frame near lock to create enough slack in the mechanism to undo the lock.

Lrn to McGyver you fucking plebian.

Any room under the door, like, enough for fingers? Lift some weight off the hinge, it will probably loosen the lock.

License/credit card it if that doesn't work. Soak toilet paper in toothpast and slide in up against lock. Let dry and spin to unlock

I'm the real McGyver.
Take shoelace out of shoe.
Loop around small metal "handle" thing on lock.
Pull with force of 1000 suns.
No grip needed.

>alone at home.
>lock the shitter, which you are aware is rusty.
>not fixing it right away with a screwdriver, some wd-40 and a file or sandpaper.
>the screw is obviously worn-out due to using the wrong size screw-driver so you can't unscrew it with a pair of tweezers or a nail-clipper.
you deserve your fate.

>wearing shoes indoors.
absolutelyharam.jpg

This user is stupid enough to get locked in a bathroom, no way they have a license or credit card

eat own shit
drink toilet water
wait for help

forgot to mention, do at least one full turn around it so the shoelace doesnt break.

If barefoot, plait rope of hair.
If short haired, use pubes.
Pubes will be long enough, who are you kidding, Sup Forumstard.

If no ones home why lock the door? Also undo that screw with something in the bathroom or pop the pins up out the hinges if you have something in there or on you to do that

>when u at home and you shut the shitter door

It's not that type of lock anyways

He said he's at home

Take the top of the shitter. There is a float, with a metal rod attatched. Unscrew it, and pry between the door and frame.

Level up your magic skill by spamming harmless spells until you're experienced enough to cast Unlock

1)Fap repeatedly
2) Cover self in your retard DNA
3)Call non-emergency police
4)Wait

Wearing a belt? Use the metal part of the belt to push on the mechanism so it don't hurt your soft womanly like fingers

well fuck, man, tear your tshirt to shreds and make some damn rope to loop around the handle if youre really too embarassed to call someone.

You fucking autist. Go get a paper clip and try to pick a lock with it and let me know how that works for you. Stop believing everything u see on tv dumb ass

call 911, dipthong.

LITERALLY break the door open. This is possible no matter what excuse you give. Just do it.

>fill bathtub up halfway with water
>walk in place while pushing on the wall for 12 hours
>you'll build up enough speed to rush right through the door

call the fire deparment duhh

Then kick a fuckin hole big enough to crawl through. Why are you even asking? Do you believe a door is some impenetrable barrier?

I also thought about that, but lifting a door off its hinges has to be done pretty much straight vertically which requires
a) door to be open (in most cases)
b) not having a lock preventing vertical movement

Bro, open up the back of the toilet. All kinds of shit in there to use to open that door

You'll have to survive by eating your own shit.

And how is calling someone gonna help if the lock is on the inside. He's bullshitting

>>I'm home alone for the weekend.
...why did you lock the door in the first place?

>didn't read the entire thread
>Newfag

/thread

Why The fuck do you lock the door when the closest person you know is 2 hours away

Can't see your hinges, if it's the type I'm thinking of you can pop the pins out and just pull the door towards you and it will fall off

Witnessed

um, take the roundy springy thingee from the wall mount shit paper holder and try to wedge it under the hingepins and tap it patiently with your shoe used as a hammer until the pin comes loose. a bathroom (standard) has only 2 hinges and with 1 out of the equation the door only has 2 points of security to the frame and even if you're a yogurt armed pussy you should be able to wrestle the door open. good luck

im not op. but regardless. you can't pop the pins out, which requires lifting the door upwards, when its locked into the wall preventing vertical movement.

Holy chekt Bathman...

use tweezers as center punch. use shoe as hammer. use spit as lube. when you're out wash your hands and make me a sandwich. you're welcome

Take a shit, finger your asshole and eat the shit off your fingers.

Post pics.

Break door down. Fix the door or frame, whichever gave first.

Or call someone you flaming retard. Too bad you're too autistic to have made friends with your neighbors.

I guess you could try to force it like this but its probably gonna bend one of the pins, and or the lock, and or gouge the fuck out of the wall.
It seems OP doesn't really want to damage anything, or pay up for emergency services.

Or, more likely, its bait, or something else.

youtube.com/watch?v=FiMtlfHTGRE

um, you can onlypop the pins out when it's closed. a closed door is the most aligned it can get. also, it isnt a lamborghini and doesnt have doors that open up. it's one door has 2 hinges and opens into the room horizontally so not sure where this lifting thing you came up with falls into play. you must be retarded

Mmmmm. Wait for real problems in your life.
In the mean time, improvise.

While you're in there and your phone is working, you might as well film yourself jacking off and proceed to post it to Sup Forums. With a timestamp of course.

the hinge and pin is stronger than anything else related to the door. it's always a more solid metal than the lock and handle and it will not bend by simply tapping it out. if it is sticking-spit on it. saliva is a helluva drug when used in moderation

Why did you lock the door when you're home alone?

Must

if your home alone WHY THE FUCK DID YOU LOCK THE DOOR??

Call 911 faggot

STINK THAT PLACE UP OP

Make an hero

you cant kick down a door that opens into a room you're in. you'd be battlng the contact made on 3 sides: the left right and top of the frame. that-in abstract thinking-is a triangle of contact and as every stupid faggot including OP's parents knows a triangle is the most sturdy architectural shape there is. you must be retarded too

One time a coworker locked the breakroom door and I convinced our boss that I could totally pick the lock, but it would take me some time. It was an excuse to dick around for an hour. but i crammed two small allen wrenches into the mechanism, and wiggled them around like I've done countless times in countless video games, and eventually I totally got it to pop open. So fuck you you fuckin faggot, start believing more in shit you see on tv you fuckin cunt.

Hold the handle, budge the door up down back forth like a autist

pointless questions, what's done is done. perform a root cause analysis after we rescue this faggot

Hey guys it me OP I got out! Turns out kicking it was the best option

Pour shampoo on the lock and get it slick

Its not gonna bend by tapping it out but for the third time the door has a LOCK STUCK INTO THE WALL. Normal vertical movement is hindered by SAID LOCK STUCK INTO THE WALL.

Get it, now?

It's a shit room indoor cheap door. Even if it open in the room you are in IT'S A CHEAP HLLOWED DOOR.

This isn't Sup Forums

lol no. you did not an unlimited amount of monkeys on unlimited numbers of typewriters can write a novel pick a lock with 2 allen wrenches you're full of shit. to pick a lock you need a pick and a rake to align the pins. cool story though

>Home alone
>Locking door
You deserve it dumbshit

Cum on lock to lube it up

nope, it's hindered by 3 points of contact. 2 hinges and a lock. remove 1 point of contact and i guarantee you it will almost fall off. i know you're frustrated and scared but dont get snippy with the nigger trying to help you

How the fuck will calling someone fix this problem? The lock is on your side of the door, you need to fix it

why the fuck did you lock the door if you're alone retard?
You deserve to be stuck in there.

this, even if there isnt room under the door push your palms up against the door.It should give you enough grip to at least push the door up enough

But you didn't break it did you, you just shifted the weight of the whole door that the lock was taking because it was jammed.

Thats why I asked if there was finger-space under the door, lifting the weight off the lock often makes it easier to open.


BTW, sick and tired of you not knowing whats part of a street sign and what isn't, captcha.

genuinely consider this

I can swing by in 14-16 hours, what's the address OP?

fap

the door is framed in 1"x1" and coated with two 1/8" pressboards on each side. at most OP would MAYBE kick a hole that his leg would get caught in-provided he didnt break an ankle by kicking a stud. lrn2 basic construction faggot. also lrn2 door installation faggot

Only if you're a complete degenerate with no soap or other common bathroom lubricants.

Again, I'm not OP, and again, yes, you could force it off even with the lock jammed into the wall, but it might bend THE FIRST pin, or GOUGE THE WALL FROM THE LOCK. I'm not getting snippy, im capitalizing the important parts that you just don't seem to be able to process in your nigger brain without a door in front of you.