TUG OF WAR

TUG OF WAR
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tug of war

because it's fuckin' rad.

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gibs me dat pigeon racing my man. for the memery

Croquet

>ART COMPETITIONS

>bowling

THERE WAS BOWLING IN THE OLYMPICS!?

ICE HOCKEY

Wheel chair racing

Bring back firefighting, the US would dominate

>Cannon shooting
Holy fuck THIS

Roller hockey, we need fucking SOMEthing to be reliably good at

>Cannon shooting

what

>Lifesaving

FUCKING LIFE SAVING?

>Cannon shooting was a demonstration sport in the 1900 Olympic Games in Paris.[1][2] It consisted of 17 events, all for men. Only French competitors participated.

haha what

This desu. Have Japan come out to Burning Rangers.

I saw this, what?
How do you medal in saving someones life?
Do you sit around and waterboard some people, and see who can save them?

Surf life saving would be rad and we'd probably pocket some medals.

>tfw a wild cannonball shoots off and explodes in some favela

Croquet
I need extreme coquet

Or schoolshooting

Cannon shooting

TUG OF WAR

>Olympics in France
>competition for only Frenchies
can you imagine this level of medal rigging today?

Yeah, I want the USA to get more gold medals too.

Pigeon racing

either baseball, football, or fucking tug of war because that sounds sick as fuck I mean watching fucking olympians play tug of war would be great.

might be an improvement desu

>All these fun as fuck sports stopped
>Instead we get 100 heats of swimming

I'd like to see Polo, but Argentina would probably dominate every time.

It's like a combination of surf boat racing, run+swim races and like some beach athleticsy stuff.

>Cannon shooting was a demonstration sport
>demonstration sport

Are you a fucking imbecile?

>tfw no one can tell.

Fucking bowling.

Kiteflying.

Tug of War

>having hockey at both Olympics

Redundant.

ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART

water-motorsports, like jet ski races?

>art competitions

How in the fuck were these ever included?

Wheel chair racing

>no hurling since 1904
WHAT

25m longboard doubles road racing

Think of the keks

>only competitor
>get silver

Bowling, maybe one of us could win the gold and shove it up their ass and post it here

I'm sorry what

BASED KITE FLYING

w-what

This would actually be quite an interesting event to watch. Of course it would have to be like kayaking, where the athlete gets multiple attempts at the course and only their best attempt is counted.

There are so many good ones:

Cannon shooting
Fire fighting
Art
Ballooning
Pigeon racing
Tug of war
Wheelchair racing

Wheel chair racing would be amazing.
>110km track
>hit speeds of 70km going downhill
>hit speeds of 2km going up hill.
>super small legs. Upper body of gorilla.

Tug of War, how is this even a question?

It's not the bowling you think, fatty

There was a guy who won 2 golds for swimming and then, 28 years later, won a silver for architecture.

Maybe other countries were disqualified for performance-enhancing pencils?

>you will never see Bob Ross bring home a gold for the American lads in olympic painting.

feels bad famalam

Check out 1948. Only bronze awarded for vocal performance and reliefs. Silver and bronze for arts and crafts, instrumental music, and medals and plaques. Were the singers really bad that year? Did the reliefs not pop out enough? Did they not use enough glitter, pipe cleaners, and popsicle sticks in arts and crafts?

>olympics held in belgium
>belgians win medals in every art event except architecture
i think it's pretty obvious why they didn't give sinding-larsen gold

Fuck it, if they are going to have some of these non-sports they might as well introduce chess as an Olympic event

As a non-meme answer I will suggest Bowling.

Bowling is a great sport that fosters community and business, can be played indoors, and has a low barrier level for entry.

Bowling alleys have been going out of business in the US, Canada, UK and a lot of Europe.

But internationally it's still strong and is growing in popularity in Asia.

Inclusion in the Olympics would be just the thing for Bowling to get a makeover in the west. For too long it has been associated with sleezy guys stuck in the 70s. That's not what Bowling is. The game can be so much more than that.

America could get out and go Bowling again. That would be nice.

Also, the one on one and turn based nature of the game can create a lot of drama and good TV.

>1948
>giving a woman or a man with a woman's name anything higher than bronze

Why were the 1900 Olympics so based?

>Angling
>Ballooning
>Cannon shooting
>Cricket
>Croquet
>Fire fighting
>Kite flying
>Lifesaving
>Auto racing
>Motorcyle racing
>Pigeon racing
>Tug of war
>Polo
>Rugby

This is what would happen if the Discovery Channel got the Olympics instead of NBC.

You're right, really. Ice bowling is a cornerstone of the Winter Olympics.

I don't get how can you lose to fucking nothing

>kite flying
how the fuck was this judged

Chess would be a pretty based event, actually. Nobody is ever going to beat Magnus Carlsen though

>fire fighting

this would be fucking great to bring back

Maybe based on the complexity of trick performed or maybe it was battle kites where you've got a blade attached to it and you try and cut the other person's kite string.

>tfw olympics have changed from an honest display of amateur sporting prowess to a drugged up geopolitical competition
>tfw people can't even understand how fun or entertaining events were held without being judged

>tug of war
>Arms severed
HOLY SHIT

I like Bowling, i don't care.
So that one.

I need Olympic level pigeon racing to get through my shitty life.

>tfw olympics have changed from an honest display of amateur sporting prowess to a drugged up geopolitical competition

Well, you can thank the Soviets for the drugged up part and Hitler for the geopolitical competition part.

...

>Mixed Architecture

yes....

iktf

The Olympics revival at the beginning of the last century was kind of a joke (bringing back a weird Ancient Greek tradition). Somewhere in the years people started actually taking it seriously.

Jesus Christ

bowling because anyone can do it

angling (fishing?) would be pretty cool t b h

>650 people
>1500 people
>probably a few hundred

well, there's your problem

>Silver and bronze for arts and crafts
To the same guy too.

I'm guessing there's a minimum qualifier to get gold, like in 100m you couldn't get gold if you ran over 10 seconds, even if you finished 1st.

>you will never relax with a beer and chips to watch live coverage of the men's 6 hour angling event
>you will never smile quietly to yourself as the commentator softly interjects with a wry observation after 45 minutes of silence
>you will never reach peak comfy

>bowling 'requires' special shoes

>wanting to fall on your ass

>being a stupid with no coordination or balance

I'm surprised no one has said football

Wouldn't it be fun to watch Tebow and a bunch of college kids style all over the world? Would watch/10

t. someone who has never been bowling before

>dat feel you can hone your engraving skills and be an Olympic athlete.

NIKO, LETS GO BOWLING

Boat racing

lol

Football is not popular enough on an international scale.

Tell those fags to get off their ass and learn Rugby and represent us.

I heard bowling could be in 2020's

There wouldn't be enough time to have an actual tournament anyways

why even live?

squash?