I think we need a best of Sup Forums/ best greentext thread

I think we need a best of Sup Forums/ best greentext thread

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reddit.com/r/Sup
youtu.be/CXbTzJCCe_w
twitter.com/NSFWRedditImage

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yep

>reddit.com/r/Sup Forums/

How do you greentext?

>be at fast food place
>see guy at nacho bar
>he making nacho
>turns out to be eminem

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1/2

2/2

Truly an enthralling story.

damn this one one of the very best

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WHO
THE
FUCK
HAS
TIMES NEW ROMAN
FOR
TIME
AND
BATTERY
????????

ok ill dump what i have...

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1/1

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2/2

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3/3

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Here's one I found
>driving home one day
>playing game I usually play
>the game is follow someone as long as I can on the way home
>do this a lot, learn a lot about people but nothing particularly interesting
>except this day was different
>following guy, I dubbed him Jose
>he goes to McDonald's, orders 4 large drinks
>ok nothing unusual
>he dumps one out, it's just ice
>wut
>keep following him
>he dumps another out, same thing
>throws jacket out window
>da fuck
>he pulls over and has a smoke
>I park at the corner in the dark, lights off watching him
>pisses in one of the cups
>shits in the other
>carefully puts lid back on both
>what the fuck is happening
>gets back in his car with the cups
>follow him down the street
>he throws the shit cup at a car, it splatters on the windshield
>drives by some guy on a bicycle
>he saw it happen and made an audible "that's gross nigga"
>the guy pulls up at a light
>I'm two cars behind him
>he tosses a cup out the window at some guy on a quad
>pulls off really fast, I lose him
The fuck, Jose?

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>be me
>alcoholic
drinking too much alcohol fucks up your stomach acid and basically gives you the shits 24/7.
>wake up needing a shit
>go for shit
>its like pissing rusty water out of my asshole
>about 2 hrs later i have the same happen again
>litterally by 12-1 o'clock i had about 3-4 shits
>have to go to AA meeting cause i really want help
>scared to go cause i might shit myself
>go cause i really wanna sober up
>in the meeting after about 30 mins its my turn to speak
>start to speak
>feel a rumbling inside my ass and i know that its the shits again
>hold it in for as long as i can
>clenching like fucking mad
>clenching so hard that my voice starts to go weird
you know how this is gonna end
>half way through sharing buy drinking issues
>cant hold it any longer
>accept my fate
>relax the old shit pipe
>start pissing the rusty waster out of my ass and this time theres peanut sized chunks of shit in it too
>seeps through clothes
>litterally sitting in a room with like 20 people around
>liquid shit seeps thru clothes and runs all over the chair
>stand up
>say sorry
>waddle out in shame
>I no longer drink....

>Fuck ur greentext ill have a plate of nachos cus i havent ate.

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>Mommy, Mommy, Tendies for me!
>Didn't you know that it's my disease?
>It's not autism Mommy, it's something bigger.
>Get to the oven or the REEEEE's you will trigger.
>Don't make me come down there.
>You know what will happen.
>Someone will get hurt.
>You will drink my pee pee's and eat poo poo for dessert
>I counted and counted
>Good Boy Points, I have plenty.
>Go get me the Tendies I want.
>I'm gonna need about twenty.
>Don't try to change my nappy.
>You won't like the surprise.
>My butthole is filled
>with maggots and flies.
>I lick Ranch dressing from my fingers
>as I make my plan.
>Don't make your Good Boy leave you Mommy
>I'll go hang myself
>and wake up in Anime-land.
>Where the Tendies are free
>and never far from my hands.
>We can go to the BK.
>2AM, you must drive.
>I will certainly need a crown
>or I will leave nobody alive.
>Now take me home.
>I need to eat Tendies in peace.
>Tomorrow we start again.
>Just listen for my REEEEEEEEEEEEE's
>Mommy is crying.
>She must be so happy.
>I get more Good Boy points,
>in the drive-through I took off my nappy
>Mommy was puking, she must be so sick.
>It felt really good when I showed the BK man my dick.
>Mommy and Step-daddy are yelling and screaming.
>If this doesn't stop soon my room I will be leaving.
>They know what will happen.
>I've done it before.
>I throw all my piss-jugs all over the floor.
>Sometimes I lose GBP
>and sometimes I gain.
>Sweet, sweet Tendies
>I will taste you again.

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>NIGGERS

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Are you and op retarded?
It's 1/3, 2/3, 3/3

there you have it got many more but i cant be bothered to dump them, hope you enjoy these...

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Sorry autism kicked in when I read op's

autism is a helluva drug. are you really good at pokemon go?

>turn 360 and walk away
wow I didn't know MJ used Sup Forums

I see the truth now! It's not just just a meme anymore! It makes sense!

you must be new here

nah I'm well aware of the meme, I just enjoy that gif and post it everything I see "360 degrees and walk away"

Newfag detected

>be visiting Japan
>be pretty good Japanese speaker
>be walking past sumo stadium
>approached by Japanese guys in business suits
>"we needu peepuru who canu speaka engurushu!"
>ask what for
>"ringu annansa!!!"
>I can be a ring announcer
>seen that Buffer douchebag do it a thousand times
>shitseasyman.ini
>enter stadium
>my match features a sumo wrestler known for winning matches with his hundred hand slap
>ehonda.jpg
>see him backstage
>hes seven types of fat
>he is changing his elderly father's diaper
>old slant-eyes has the Hershey squirts
>river of chocolate
>willywonka.bin
>match is starting, hurry to ring
>get handed paper with the competitors names and info on it
>grab mic, start announcing
>"in this corner, we have..."
>MFW his name is written in Kanji
>I can't read that crap
>a thousand slanty eyes are waiting for me to finish
>time to make something up
>they can't understand English anyway
>"introducing, from right here in Japan, the slap-happy jappy with the crap-happy pappy!"
>MFW thousand slanty eyes get slantier
>MFW I hear the subtle yet poignant sound of a hundred katanas being unsheathed
>MFW I niigoro my ass the fuck out of Japan

Goddamn worth the read

Took me 15 minutes to read that and just...wow heart braking and funny at the same time.

doesn't sound realistic.

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fuck off it was good

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Glorious! prob not real tho

final role 1-9 god don't exist

Shit.
Shit.
Shit.

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maybe he switched between locales and it fucked with his fonts?

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somebody plz read these and tell me if they're worth it. kthx

have a few

Actual true story

>be an admin for a game (fonline)
>got complaints from users about one player
>go check the player in invisible mode
>looks like a bot is controlling the character
>trying to chat with him, no response
>observe him more and decide to ban him
>one week later he writes a message on the forums
>asking for what got he banned
>tell him because of using bots
>after a week receive a long answer
>dude is a cripple with no arms
>tells that the game is the only thing what makes him live for
>after the ban he was so enraged that accidentally hurt his feet
>coded few scripts to make gaming easier
>never coded a bot, never bothered to answer the chat in a game
>he coded it using just his legs

This guy for sure:

Im the dude with rhe fonts, cant care less. Enjoy my times new roman faggit

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This is one of my fav

>falling for that shit

holy shit your a retard

where have I seen her?
youtu.be/CXbTzJCCe_w

Really you fucking twink

top fucking kek

Probably the best one ive got

imgur com/gallery/dTJWF

True classic...

Who got brother sister camping trip green text?

fucking kek

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not good

okay but janky

a true classic
always worth the read, brilliant story

it doesnt matter, if its written as a good story, it is worth the read true or not

What the actual fuck is wrong with that Captcha? It's in gibberish. Have you been hacked? It could have something to do with your system clock. I notice the date claims it's Saturday morning, but it's still Friday evening. You may not realize this but having your system set to the correct time is essential. Eastern is the most correct, but Central, Mountain, and Pacific are ok too, but avoid all others because they are foreign, and probably not calculated on par with American scientifical standards Is that a Windows phone, that I hear like 100 people actually bought, like intentionally? MS has had a history of not keeping their own NTP servers synchronized correctly, and it's caused numerous security issues over the years. Synchronizing to just one server is a bad idea because of this. You should set at least three, and ideally more primary and backup servers, in case one fails--one can fail, it's unlikely that ten will at the same time. If it's not a Windows phone, I'm guessing it's an iPhone. MS owns a lot of Apple stock, so they get a real say in how the company is run, which is shitily since MS is involved. Android is unfortunately the only acceptable choice for phones, but all in all, they aren't a significant improvement, so you should probably just ditch the idea of having a cellular phone altogether, and go back with the tried and true, traditional landline. If I can be of any more assistance please let me know.

clearly samefagging with same grammar

Nigger what

I think her pic used to get posted around here a bit actually. Like in fat hate threads.

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THIS NEEDS TO BE A MOVIE

mah feels man

literal ass

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It literally says how to do it in the picture you autismo.

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