I am 18, and in Alcoholics Anonymous for fucking Xanax. I have some concerns. Firstly...

I am 18, and in Alcoholics Anonymous for fucking Xanax. I have some concerns. Firstly, I have been in the program seven months and it has been a rewarding and eye opening experience when it comes to drug and alcohol addiction.

My story is not that bad, I just smoked a fuckload of pot when I was 17-18, and eventually started abusing Xanax that was prescribed to me. Not for long though, just maybe a couple weeks before my parents (my mom mainly who has been in AA 8 years) did the right thing, and threatened to kick me out if I didn't get sober.

Here's the part that pisses me off;

I feel trapped within AA. Because I am getting to the point where it's time to start thinking about moving out, and I have been thinking about AA while independent a lot. I think I may have overreacted. I was not dying from an addiction, I just didn't know how to get off xans by myself and needed some help. I am young and don't want to be sober forever, but if I leave my parents would know since they are in the program.

SO

I am not sure how to approach my parents, if at all once I move out. It's not like I will leave the program and be a total fucking nut job, I just miss smoking weed from time to time and relaxing.

You're 18, once you move out and no longer rely on them do what you like

What if shit goes south with my living situation and I end up having to move back in?

I work in service industry as a line cook at a pretty prestigious restaurant right now. But if I lost my job I would be fucked and have to move back home. My parents are liberals except when it comes to drugs. Just have no idea how to approach them and say 'AA taught me a lot, but I don't think it was for me and I think I overreacted' with out them thinking I am a liar.

You honestly sound like every addict I have ever known. "Nah man, I am not really that bad. I can maintain, bro." It never works out that way.

You got into AA sooner than a lot of people do, that's true. Most have to hit rock bottom to get any sort of perspective. You got in before that, and that's why you still don't have that clarity. Trust me, you need the program.

>keep going to AA and stay off drugs, and have a basically normal life
>leave AA, find out you can't handle your drug use on your own, and end up with a ruined life, hitting rock bottom, and being a complete failure for the next 20 years, then go back to AA (maybe) when you realize how badly you fucked yourself

Choose one and only one.

Are you expected to go to AA for the rest of your life now?

How much time do you have? You sound like my fellowship.

I got into it so people would get off my back, and I could continue living at my house. Never really expected to give up on drugs and alcohol forever.

It gets better, the program will lead you into a structured way of life; beware of relapses though I lost a job, moved in with a s/o in another state, and basically just did a metric fuck ton of xanax, oxy, and molly in conjunction with Alcohol, almost started in on meth, but was able to avoid it. I have since moved back home, I am sober now for the most part. Just be upfront with your parents and show them that you can exist without needing substances, the rest of it will take care of itself. I live at home with my parents, consume edibles every week when I go hiking. And my parents think I am just really happy and to be honest I am, it's all about finding that balance within yourself. Once you lose trust it is hard to regain, so showing society first and then your parents 2nd is of utmost importance. When I went through my program a fellow attendee left me with words that I have not been able to shake "Do what you love and fuck the rest, no one is going to give a shit about you when you are in a box underground; right here right now as you look at me you are dying. So do yourself a favor go die somewhere you want to be"

AA kills my vibe. the energy of NA I find to be so much more positive. I always left AA with even more of a hankering to get fucked up. If it helps you, that's great, but in my experience it did more harm than anything.

All I can say is that my parents were a big part of my drug addiction, and moving out and building up my own life was the best thing I could've done. At the time it seemed like an impossible thing to do: they didn't want me to move out, so how could I possibly do that? You'll get to a point where you have to get out, it'll happen sooner or later. Your parents can't keep you 'locked in' like that.

As much as your parents want to control your life, you're your own person, and they will never stop you from using drugs if you want to.

Aww shit bro and I was bout too sleep. I'm 24 in AA for heroin, got 73 days now. I feel you on this bro but addiction is cunning and catches us when we least expect it
The fact is ypu might not relapse if you smoke but the odds are against you, plus you'd be lieing about your use if you stay in the program. Trust me it hurts I would know.
I thought I never felt bad for lies or the that kid dieing from oding but I do, we all do unless your a sociopath
Let's fucking talk about this man, how would you approach staying in aa/maintaining sobriety?

Basically this user nailed it. It's scary but one day at a time, not a lifetime. We are not terminally unique and odds are you will relapse if you smoke pot. Better men than us have proven this

Have you made amends? Finished the steps? If so take into account you very well will sound like a lier
You sponsering anyone?

Nice photo OP

Also, maybe you could try some other stuff than AA, what about therapy? I had behavioral therapy and EMDR, especially the latter helped me to understand my heroin addiction. Been clean now for almost a year.

Anymore photos OP?

I want to leave the program as soon as I leave my parents house because I do not feel obligated to stay anymore. I miss cannabis, my normie friends smoke quite a bit. I don't miss the xans, never have since I quit. Nasty fuckers.

I hate it though because I made some great friends in AA, and if I leave the program, I leave them too. That's another concern because I genuinely love those guys with all my heart I just think I was in a bad situation at the time and immature. My parents blew my using out of proportion and called me an addict, when in reality I was using Xanax maybe once a week and smoking weed daily while in school and passing classes.

I, in my opinion, was just being a 17 year old millennial.

Now I am stuck in AA. And have no idea how to get out without my entire family thinking I am a relapsing drug addict.

>44414
I have made a few amends, and I am on step 9 now. Scared to make it to 12 because I will feel locked into this shit if I pick up a sponsee

I am in therapy as well, been making some breakthroughs.

Pic related

Sup Forumsro that isn't the same chick

I know the OP posted chick. Do you have more? I do

Oh I thought you meant of the similar style, sorry no more from the set.

I don't but would love more as long as it does not totally derail my bread.

I hope you skipped your parents amends because that's gonna suck
Look man I've been in your shoes but with opiates. I thought Everytime was gonna be different but people died because of me and I lost my soul. I just don't want you too be me, 24 and living with folks finally bout to get through college. Xanax is still crazy addictive and dangerous. We've all been in your shoes, uncertain about the program and the future. That's why you have these 50 year Olds coming in for their white chip over and over
So tell me why people thought you were an addict? If your unsure go back out, fuck it find out
Finally you can't sponser if you use, please don't do it

If you want more later I can give em to yah. Don't want to derail your thread Sup Forumsro. You from Australia?

>being enough of a weak willed faggot to get addicted to anything
>using any type of prescription pill ever

you are the ultimate goy

It may be time to start using again man. You sound exactly like all real addicts. I've been in before for other people. Once you are miserable enough you can do it for you. I envy you though. Maybe you can do something with your life instead of wasting 20 years like I did.

Hey op it's heroin user, I made this just for you, you terminally unique bastatd. Kik goldeye666

Shut the fuck up, you probably are too afraid of drugs to even touch them; go jack off to porn and play mobas with your Sup Forumsro's

Chill user he lives in mom's basement, probly never slammed a bitch high af on speedball before
Not worth anyone's tome

kill yourself. life only gets worse.

Go ahead and dump, should not affect the conversation too much, I am U.S fag. Thanks user.

Thanks man

I was about to do it, and can't move to 10 until I can. I don't expect to go back out for at least a couple of months still. Was put the nail in the coffin was I took what I remember was 4 .5mg benzos and woke up to the entire bottle being gone. Woke up in the guest room on the floor after I apparently fell up the stairs and yelled at my mom for fifteen minutes in some slur of moans and grunts and then fell over, landed on the coffee table, and crawled into the guest room. Slept for 17 hours. I only remember taking four while I was playing Battlefield 4.

Will contact you soon.

I fucked a bitch after she railed a ton of adderall, but thats a different story.

Thanks man, working in the service industry I am starting to understand.

I beg to differ, go smell a flower or buy that stupid fucking lava lamp on Amazon. Life is what you make it.

Where'd you find the OP photo Sup Forumsro. She is an AusFag

/wg/

Aight well kik me bro, I'm staying awake for you. Fucking school in 5.5 hours.
Ok so there's your bottom, what did your using look like? Money spent, times per week with dosage, these are things in wanna know. I was a drug dealer (heroin, pills, weed, some coke) and still get called the walking physicians desk reference plus being a heroin addict means I have some insight on addiction. so fucking tell me what your life was like and why you were miserable enough to ask for AAS help.
Feel free to kik or post answer

sent

I did kik you lol, S C right?

Lol also me and my girl in high school girl wuf fuck after school everyday high on addys. Can't beat a good ol speedball though
Addys for class oxys for night was my highschool motto

I was sober. Worst sex I ever had.

Haha I'm Mr user e moose, only initials

Funny shit is I used to host a nightly Sup Forums Sobriety Meeting when I had just a few months. Any body here remember those?

I could never come on heroin/opiayes, sucked. Was cool when I was a teen cuz I impressed girls with it but quickly lost its charms. Plus they either get a lil offended or love it

Haha did you read the chair stuff? I would've gone! Fucking make my own coffee too