ITT : We work in the same office

ITT : We work in the same office.

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youtu.be/LsrC5QV_Yrc?t=157
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Move faggot I need to use the printer

Who the fuck shit in the plant next to the coffee station???

Pardon me while I stuff my feces into the Mac. It needs an upgrade.

>working when you can have gay space communism

Who the fuck keeps eating my food out of the fridge?! Is it you again Gary?!?! I HAVE DIETARY RESTRICTIONS GARY, YOU ASSHOLE!

>cell phone in the air

ACTIVATE!!!

im banging christine

Ok, who the fuck shat in my drawer?!
Was it Bob again?

All right ye fucking cunts. I swer on me mum's grat-aunt's grave that if I catch the sorry bastard who keeps eating me food, I will fooking tear him 5 new assholes on his blasted face.

i quit

LOL!
Taz just went berserk in the server room and now our network is down!!! Super face palm, am i rite guize????? xxxxDDDDDD

Looks like we can't go home until it's all fixed!!

xxxxxDDDD

You guys know its bring your daughter to work day right? I dont have one so i borrowed bob's from accounting

Who needed you anyway?

...

Well since you got trips, it must mean you're a pretty high level TPS reporter, introduce us!

Devops here:

Rolls out AWS cloudformation and deploys right from github.

Back up in less than an hour and taz can enjoy his new playroom.

yo who thinks the new temp has a nice ass?

Who's sending dick pics to my personal printer again?! DAVE IS THAT YOU?!

Okay who fucked the printer!!!!

I do but ya know he'll be gone by the end of winter...such a tease

such a shame

Guys?! Anyone can help me hook my bra? It got off again.

WHO FUCKING ZIP-TIED THE TOILET PAPER ROLLS?!?!

Cuming margret

I remember that haha, good story

who isn't?

On it!

I am the person who works here but no one knows. After hours I clean the messes you made. I always get my revenge though. Tomorrow the printer is going to fail on you again and the coffee will taste a little nutty.

anyone watched the news yesterday?

Hey I'm going out for a smoke break, can you print out this report for me? I'll be right back

Literally the only person doing any work here, figuratively speaking.

Alright. Who stole my burger?!

Genius!

I'm calling HR I'm allergic to nuts

I didn't but what was up?

Hey guys I really think Dusty is about to loose it, you think he'll shoot up the place?

Zip tie him to his chair. All good.

Dusty...dusty... hhmmm doesn't ring a bell, you sure someone called dusty worked here?

My mother in law is staying with us this week and this is the first time in forever that Mr. Smith doesn't want me to stay late..

he smells you tie him up, Ill call his desk and distract him

I think so man. He's been acting kind of strange lately. Oh here he comes now, hey Dusty! How's it going? You're a little la- OH FUCK HE HAS A GUN

ya the smelly weird guy from accounting, they didn't have enough room for him in their wing so they put a temp desk next to the Janitors closet

Alright. I'm on it sneaky. Give him a call in 20 seconds.

Why can't I bring my own desktop?

Guys come on, you know I'm working here for years now. Stop joking... Guys?

om my fucking god, call 9

too much porn on it, you distract your coworkers

Oh that's right, the guy that always smelt like he just bust a nut in his suit

youtu.be/LsrC5QV_Yrc?t=157
(imagine this as Dusty)

Top fucking kek, most underated post here

Dusty Bottoms?

Hey Jones you fill out the quarterly review yet? What Dusty what are you doin- GAH FUCK MY ARM

Someone call animal control there is some sort of animal up here

It seems like you ended up in stacy's cubicle

Oh yeah, you're the guy that works by his desk and walks around the office, you're a good guy, I know you.
You don't own any firearms do you?

Glad I worked from home today!

I get the corner office after they fix the window.

Where is everybody?

Didn't someone make it out?

whos the receptionist?

Shhhh... stay very quiet and still, there is a dyslexic on the loose

im going home

Why bro?

>hey guys did you hear about what happened to Larry over the weekend?

I heard his fantasy team lost and he had to remove a testicle because of some dibz decides on fortanbee website

What in the FUCK are you guys doing? Nothing is done for today!

Corporate is coming to check on us today at 2pm, and you people are here trying to leave?

Christmas party today at 3pm, Stanley is Santa

like hell i am

Sir, we were just talking about Larry's testicle accident yesterday. We need a grief counselor to come in or at least order us a cheese pizza *grins and gives shitty look to Mike the pedo

15 Schrute bucks for to say you'll be Santa

Who drank his bud lite

your schrute bucks are worthless dwight. i'll see you all when the alcohol gets here.

False.. Shrutes dont pay for Santa "Satan" gifts, we only celebrate harvest festivals

Corporate's coming today? I am over dressed.

*strips naked*

man i love this job i get to eat all the food i want in the public fridge

You're forcing me guys. Fine, I'll just be Belsnickel and I'm gonna beat your asses with a stick until Corporate gets here.

And I'll get you that cheese pizza if you can find all my weapons I hid around the office.

>For fuck's sake user, there's cumstains on my monitor and keyboard again!

>user, we need to use the printer for our reports and shit. Please stop printing all your anime girls.

>Someone hanged themselves in the bathroom again.

>What's that smell? Ugh user's been pissing and shitting himself again while binge-watching anime girls getting raped.

>There is a dresscode here in the office and it does not include fur-suits, user.

Am I doing it right?

HOLY SHIT GARY GOT A GUN RUN!

this is Ahkmet from IT support. Just here to inform ya that the printer is NOT meant to print dick pics. Kthanxbye.

Also don't forget
>Bring your child to work day is now cancelled after some molestation
You know who i am taking about Steve

Who the fuck let this faker in?

new guy just chill its his banana from lunch his mom packs his autist ass everyday

>looks at Gary, gary has no banana just uncut downy cock in hand chasing irene from quality control

see its fine new user just a regular day at our Sup Forums 500 company

Hey guys there was a complent that a guy in a balaclava in the woman bathroom spying on a lady peeing and talking about repeteing digits

That ivan

Who want's some Indian food? I've got roti and aloo!

Marcus' locker smells like pee and i think i saw some bottles in there

"WHERE THE FUCK IS JOHNSON WITH THE GOLDSTEIN CONTRACTS?!"

Might be mountain dew in clear bottles dipped in pee.

Johnson is pooping.

You got pickle with it bro?

If you guys could please stop putting dick pics in the file for the corporate, that would be great!

Fuck off marty, we're busy

That is just Edward he got some brain damage as a child

*spins in chair* :)

Sucks to be you Barry, anyway, do you want to get out for smoke?

Who wants coffee? I was going to the second floor anyway.

WHERE IS THE COFFEE!, I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL KILL ALL OF YOU IF I DON'T GET MY COFFEE

Why is this cat on my desk?

damnit Feng we told you not to bring your lunch to work if it wasnt already cooked!

bumping

you mother fucking ratty bitch! you never bump off the clock when its break time

how many times do I have to tell you masturbation isn't working