>be me >two weeks ago >at the bar playing darts >pretty drunk >3/10 fat trap bitch walks up with fagtard friend >in deepest voice I've ever heard she requests next game >"well clearly you don't have a feminine penis" >they both stare at me >"wtf did you just say to me" >I asked, "well, do you have a feminine penis or not?" >her friend steps in >200% gayest voice I've ever heard >"faggot detected" >he tries to sucker punch me but misses >I scream, "YOU DUN GOOFED" >punch him right in the jaw >he's laying on ground bleeding >girl runs off to get bartender >crowd gathering >girl is crying hate crime >starts telling everybody what I said >bartender comes over >"check 'em, faggot" >bartender gets pissed >calls me a homophobe and demands I leave now >"what the fuck did you just say about me you little bitch?" >"I'll have you know I graduated top..." >bartender pops me in the mouth >grabs me by the neck and drags me towards the door >get outside >crowd has followed >cops already there >cops ask my name >"Pepe. Rare Pepe" >they look confused and annoyed >I repeat it >"Son, what are you on right now?" >I reply, "dank memes, sir" >cops misheard, think I said dank weed >immediately get slammed to ground by cops >they're going on about how I'm drunk and high in public and starting fights >"I said dank memes, fucking newfags" >cop punches me in the back of the head >wake up hours later in a jail cell >list of charges include inciting a riot, hate crimes against members of the LGBTQ community, public drunkeness, and assaulting a police officer.
I'm still waiting on my court date. How bad did I fuck up, Sup Forums?
Jaxon Sullivan
The Sup Forums defense? Its almost like pleading insanity so your odds are not good, consider a plea.
Jonathan Hill
Autism: the story
Isaac Hill
2/10 tier: newfag
Jaxson Jones
Made me Kek good job
Ryan Robinson
Newfag spotted
This is copypasta
Lucas Kelly
Op is a dumbass who deserves everything that happened to him.
Henry Richardson
OP's phants are on fire
Christian Baker
>This is copypasta
No it's not. This is original content and 100% truthful. If you don't believe me, then fuck off.
Angel Mitchell
this
Parker Price
this
Ian Young
...
Easton Miller
fucking retard
Isaiah Moore
...
Nathan Stewart
...
Robert Rogers
When you show up to court, make sure your pockets are overflowing with spaghetti, then plead insanity.
Ian Wilson
This will work, trust me, i did it before.
Gabriel Peterson
If that story's true, it's not Sup Forums's fault if you can't separate your internet life and your real life.
Blake Nguyen
This
Jacob Rogers
>Things that never happened: the post
Gavin Hernandez
This
Isaac Davis
Good greentext. Part of me wishes it was real
William Smith
Well,you can't say that court-sentence isn't...a trap
Andrew Reed
I'm asking myself How much of a neet do you have to be to reach such levels of autism?
Hunter Price
Not this
Zachary Peterson
>Using memes irl
Evan Cooper
lol top kek ultra dank give this man a banana
Oliver Myers
It is real.
Jacob Sanders
fuck off newfag, the most fake story i've heard.
Matthew Torres
Holy fuck, I think I was there that night. Were you the guy sitting at the bar earlier in the day screaming "itty bitty baby" and "habeeb it" over and over?
Dominic Bailey
is that your face tho, if it is, why you no into porno
John Green
Did You Know?
Only newfags call other people newfags.
Kevin Carter
I am into porno. I watch it everyday.
Ayden Parker
shut the fuck up you retarded piece of shit
Josiah Murphy
i mean, why you're not acting in porno
Blake King
or what if newfag(me) is just an elder who hasn't been on Sup Forums in long time.
Hudson Green
Kek
Oliver Cook
This story either happens all the time or this fucking NEW FAG thinks we're all as stupid as he is. Kill urself.
Wyatt Butler
>said the newfag
Aaron Cox
have you talked to a lawyer yet OP?
Brody Anderson
WHO
IS
THIS
4
CHAN . gif
Asher Bailey
he has the sexy boi face tho.
Jordan Baker
OP you autistic faggot
Adrian Allen
If you actually said any of that, you're a cringey asshat who deserves to be raped in prison, luckily for you, this is just copypasta.
Logan Richardson
He's a newfag because he doesn't spend every waking hour on Sup Forums so he missed it being posted? GTFO of here, newfag.
Jack Allen
Shut up faggot. Just because your dad fucked you in the ass your entire childhood doesn't mean you should be so salty to everybody else.
Kevin Harris
Not yet. They're going to give me a public defender if I don't lawyer up soon.
Jayden Miller
>who hasn't been on Sup Forums in long time.
Then yer still a newfag.
Blake Anderson
>public defender
LoL, you're so screwed
Ian Collins
I know, right? I don't know what I'm going to do. I've been talking to a guy who claims to be a lawyer, but said he primarily only works in bird law, so I'm not sure if he can help me out or not.
Might start a gofundme to raise funds for a really good lawyer. Like an OJ lawyer.
Adam Morris
I doubt anyone will fund you for a lawyer if they know what it is for. Do some research online about your states laws on this matter. You will likely get the charge for inciting a riot dropped. Make a point of bringing up how drunk you were and that it was never your intent.
Connor Bennett
ITT: newfags fall for a copy pasta almost as old as their time on Sup Forums. Have fun with your autism
Kevin Cruz
im fucking elder you cuck
Jaxon Ramirez
It's OK. You can stop trying too hard to make it look like you've been here a long time. Your newfagness is showing badly and this is just getting cringeworthy.
Xavier Clark
said the newfag
Blake Reyes
I can almost smell your autism from here. I thought trolls were supposed to be funny
Grayson Hill
I thought newfags who call others newfags were supposed to be funny
Josiah Lee
OK kid, have fun in your supa sekrit klub, Sup Forums. Now go back to posting on facebook how you are a "member" of anonymous like a good girl
Owen Phillips
Are you really that retarded that you're actually taking this seriously? For fuck's sake dude
Ethan Harris
If you.re in America, you'll likely be fine, since the fag hit you first and you were acting in self defense. Might even try to countersue the bartender and the policemen for assault.
Lincoln Cox
Good way to start a cringe thread.
Thomas Roberts
Wtf is a troll?
Asher Scott
I bet you don't have a lot of friends irl, but you'll reply to this telling me how wrong I am and how popular you are because you're cool and an intellect.
Jason Roberts
I don't need to prove anything, unlike you, I'm secure enough in that I don't have to act retarded on an anonymous forum. Now come on, time for bed
Benjamin Taylor
I'm the fucking leader of anonymous, you twat. And now you've thoroughly pissed me off. I wasn't even that close to edge, and yet your miserable dribble has actually managed to push me off. You hear that? To the end of the line. THE BREAKING POINT. Normally I dismiss this kind of shit without a second though, but you've crossed a certain boundary you fucking faggot. And you should have known better, you should have realized what could happen if you took your joke a little too far. But you failed, and now will await the reprocussions. Fuck I haven't even gotten my hacking laptop out in years, I think that shit is still running some pirated version of XP. But it's time to brush the dust off and set an example, because clearly faggots like you are too young to know what can really happen when you mess with the likes of our group. I hope you're ready for what's in store, because mommy won't be able to save you this time. Best you pack your bags and flee now, flee to whatever remote shit hole you can hide to. And you better pray I won't find you. But we will, and when that day comes you will rue the day you made what was seemingly a harmless comment on an anonymous message board. The clock's ticking, pal. Tick tock. Your time is about to run out
Benjamin Jenkins
Everything wen't according to plan =)
Mason Rivera
*repercussions
Jaxson Gray
>In other news, The Deep Web Underground Hacker Collective known as Sup Forums has issued yet another Blog post, supposedly including OC.
Matthew Wright
Top kek
Jace Torres
Sounds like something an autistic, no-friend fuck would say. Now come on little girl, time for bed. Hurr durr 1m gone 2 belittle u bcuz i'M so kewl.
Bentley Bennett
Uh-huh. Have fun, kid
Ethan Campbell
I like how you're so autistic that you can't even wrap your brain around your own autism.
James Jenkins
you are both fucking faggots, holy shit.
Nathaniel Brooks
Jesus christ you faggots are a fucking embarrassment. It's like I'm reading the text equivalent of two 11 year olds screaming at each other in a Call of Duty postgame lobby
Jeremiah Martinez
did I just trigger 3 way convo newfag claiming im newfag
Bentley Wood
Faggot
Logan Roberts
whats call of duty?
Christian Thomas
Mootle's Milk (available at WFM)
Jordan Evans
nice jaw
Cooper Davis
Kek this is one of my favorite pastas. Haven't seen it in a while.
Adam Foster
game for kids who think they fuck moms
Blake Perez
Is it like a sex game? Those are hot sometimes.
Elijah Ward
Hi, I am OP. This was actually my OC many months ago. Some fat chick was next to me at a bar and I heard her talk and realized she wasn't an ugly little fat troll girl, but instead an ugly little fat troll dude trying to pretend to be a girl. I immediately thought about her penis and whether or not it would be feminine or fat gross and ugly. That then triggered this whole line of thoughts in my head about Sup Forums, so I came home and typed it up.
I posted it again today, because I haven't seen it in awhile. Some people get a lol out of it, some hate the autism surrounding it. Oh well.
Owen Ross
but this
Luke Rogers
>I immediately thought about her penis
Thomas Rogers
it's all okay now, we love you
Evan Williams
Yea? So what? You never thought about a chicks penis? What are you, a faggot?
Zachary Thomas
i enjoyed it.
Owen Edwards
Pretty entertaining, well done.
Juan Gonzalez
Good. Am glad.
Jaxson Russell
Always works. I regualy use this
Blake Torres
no it's a shitty fps, where kids shout through mics saying they will fuck ur mom
Wyatt Cook
I thought it was an autism simulator. I learn things every day.