Need to kill self. not sure how. help wanted bby

need to kill self. not sure how. help wanted bby

Get pilots license
Buy an airplane
Get a Lion
Put on a cowboy hat and boots NOTHING ELSE
Take lion on plane to 15,000 feet
Set lion on fire
Jump out of plane while riding the lion

RIDE THAT FUCKING LION BULL-STYLE ALL THE WAY TO THE FUCKING GROUND.

OP here my nigga.

a pilot license takes time broski

fucking whores dsnt make me want to live. not good

Then steal a plane do I have to think of everything?

one does not simply steal a plane.

this is a serious post. i failed suicide once, and it wasn't by smelling your mum's vadge

>go to public area
>take a poop
>on a very young little boy
>when the police show up pull out a small knife and walk the dinosaur in their general direction
>death by police

Big plastic rubbermaid container.
Cutout for head on side to fit in.
Mix piss and bleach in bucket.
Turn container upside down.
Die from your piss chlorine gas chamber.

Shoot up a school and you'll not only die, but you'll be a celebrity to edgy lil boys in the Internet for years to come.

Kek!

if it's bleach, which is wet, how will i die from chlorine gas

are you retarded

Newfag

this requires a gun license u fucking spic

Sounds like you are a failure at everything.
Here... Let me help...

>be you
>realize that you're gay for not getting a gun and shooting up a school
>wonder to yourself if you should settle for getting a knife and stabbing up a school or just be a fucking pussy

nice, how did you find this, i've been googling forever nigga

Huh?
Just why do you need a license to commit murder?

u fucking spic, i am out of school, why go back to school just to make cnn more money

>painless
>fast
What are you, fucking gay?

pussy smells better than you

-op

no, that's the #1 problem

>how did you find this?
You ever hear of a little place called Sup Forums Sup Forums?

Shotgun shell suicide helmet is the only way. Wear it under a hood, find a know it all trying to pick up girls at a bar. Walk up and say
" you just blew my mind"
Then detonate.

Of course, that goes without saying.

>be me
>realize that not only are you fucking gay, but you're also lazy
>sob to myself as I lick the chip crumbs out of my neckbeard
And here I thought that just maybe not all OPs are faggots.

nigga, life isn't like youtube, this helmet needs to be built, that's productive

build a wall around this spic's computer

I like that one

i'm not gay. nigga, these captcha s are harder than my cock on a sunny day

-op

Any good suicide needs effort. You can't just lay across railroad tracks and end it, you need creativity.
This bro gets it.

Come home and we'll play some choking games

dude, if i spend time building a helmet, it's unproductive. dying reduces the population, that is more productive

i'm okay withis

Then swan dive off a building wearing a suit made out of barb wire hooked up to 7 D batteries.

holy shit b we r a creative group tonight

why the batteries? 7 D's? is that how many it takes ur mother to cum?

Well if you want to just be a lazy cunt, why don't just go jump off of something high?
>inb4 that's spooky
Or buy a gun and shoot yourself in the head?
>inb4 I can't get one
Or buy a fake gun, commit a crime, and when the police show up, point the fake gun at them.
>inb4 I'm a good person

These threads always end the same.

>>
how do they end. i dnt cum here anymore after the weirdos kept posting trap/trump threads

The batteries are to electrocute you know the way down. That way when you land the barbed wire cage should be glowing from having the current run through it and OPs flesh should be singed and smoking. It will look like he appeared in a fireball from the sky. He will be so disfigured on landing that people will think he is a demon.

ur fucking stupid, why do you have access to clean water

I don't.

this is the best idea so far

Here's how they go, my friendo.
>OP: guys I can't take it anymore! (Sometimes we get a long, dramatic, and usually retarded reason why) tell me how I can kill myself!
Jump off a building.
>That's fucking scary! I don't want to watch as I get closer and closer before SPLAT!
Okay, then shoot yourself.
>Do you know how hard it is to get a gun?!
Okay, then overdose.
>That doesn't work!
Alright... Why not then (perfect, easy way to kys.)
>OP abandons thread.

Every once in awhile we can talk a suicidal Sup Forumsro into live-streaming a suicide attempt, so it ain't always the same! Sometimes these threads end with a bang! (Rarely) Still, we could get lucky!
OP, do you feel like live-streaming yourself offing yourself? Do you need more encouragement? We are here for you, Sup Forumsro...

well, i'm being honest and haven't given a reason so obviously not an attention whore. didn't even post myself or claim to be a girl. helium idea is still the best.

If he's too lazy to even leave his house to off himself then he's too lazy to give us quality entertainment.

Then fucking do it, you worthless waste of space.

lol if i have to order helium online, kinda hard to live stream

"hey guys, inputting my credit card info on etsy, not sure why they sell decorative helium but wow, will pick up trucks hit on my gf???"

trying to bby, trying

You can buy helium tanks at Walmart, autist.

I'm done waiting, you meme spouting faggot. End your meaningless life.

you want me to live stream myself buying helium at walmart? B is going downhill

Yes, you are trying alright, "bby".
Trying our patience!

yea but how desu? should i stick my johnson into ur mum's aids hole? or should i look for your dad, a search that will see me dying of old age since ur a nigger

Double dubs does not lie.

nigga the best idea is helium, if u want a livestream, i need quality answers.

i literally failed a suicide 1 month ago. i'm trying for the second time and do not want to fail.

this is a legit question, not a meme, fag

>this faggots cracking jokes at us like we're retarded after coming to us for advise on literally the easiest thing to do.
I'd say off yourself, but you're already doing it.

brother, have you actually tried to kill yourself? it's not easy since the body uncontrollably tries to save itself

Police Fag here, if he is white and does that all he will get is tased.

this idea is growing on me

Sup Forums is lame. dying by helium whenever the order arrives, thx for nothing

It ain't easy to live either, you pussy!
Use a knife to cut up some meat and veggies and feed yourself... Or... You can use said knife to plunge deeply into your heart, between your ribs. Either way, you're on the wrong fucking site if you thought anyone might give a shit about whatever choices you decide to make.
>btw, I'm the one that gave you the helium idea too! Some Walmart tanks have a safety valve now. Do some research. Get off of Sup Forums.

Fucking retarded lil bitch. Go to Walmart and buy the tank. It's literally thirty dollars. I've bought one before. But if that takes to long then why not break a window and slit your wrists with the glass?

thx, will legit do this, fuck u

i like the helium idea, thx, Sup Forumseeners

>Sup Forumseeners
I ain't no wetback, bro.

Your dubs demands you follow through with life & death and ecstasy, suffering, pain, joy...
ENJOY, Sup Forumsro!
user out.