Fapfics featuring Jill from Resident Evil 3
Read em, review 'em
www.archiveofourown.org/works/7794475
www.archiveofourown.org/works/7794544
You can post anonymous reviews there, so please do so if you want to.
Fapfics featuring Jill from Resident Evil 3
Juan Scott
Camden Foster
...
Austin Sanders
...
Grayson King
...
Adam Carter
...
Aaron Cruz
...
Ayden Green
...
Luke Young
...
Hudson Kelly
...
Thomas Powell
...
Ayden Jenkins
...
Thomas Moore
...
Henry Campbell
...
Ian Gray
...
Aiden Ortiz
...
Juan Collins
...
Alexander Davis
...
Carson Robinson
...
Henry Stewart
...
Kevin Roberts
You are such a sad bastard. Stop with these fucking pathetic threads. Your writing is terrible. Give up.
Parker Reyes
Would appreciate any tips then
Angel Thomas
He probably t didn't even read it
Cooper Fisher
Did you check it out?
Jack Wilson
I read them and left a comment when you were linking to that other site a few eeks ago.
Ethan Phillips
On AFF.net?
The site has problem with comments/reviews from Mobile Phones
Nolan Richardson
I wasn't on my phone
Chase Barnes
games.adult-fanfiction.org
games.adult-fanfiction.org
Then I have no idea, because it showed up blank. What did you say?
William King
...
Carson Foster
...
James Sanders
...
Matthew Cooper
...
Sebastian Rivera
This is what I left on the Dario Rosso story
1. If you're going to break the canon you may as well just do it. The opening following the game precisely doesn't fit very well with the rest of the story and it seems out-of-place and raises the question of how did Jill get tied up if Dario locked himself in the container. Considering you have Dario commit suicide instead of being eaten by zombies as he is in the game shows you have no intention to make this scenario fit within the canon, so don't pretend to.
2. You jump around a lot with perspective. There are sentences that seem to be internal monologue that are then followed by third-person narration with no clear definition. You also jump from Dario to Jill without warning. This gets jarring and it seems as though you are just saying what springs to mind as you write rather than deliberately crafting an effective scenario.
3. The only part of the story that seemed to have been given any real attention was the rape scene. Fleshing out the story around the sex scene can enhance the sex scene itself.
4. The story reads like a first draft. Your work will benefit from spending a bit of time redrafting. Trim things that aren't working, flesh out parts that are lacking, make sure each paragraph is focused, and make sure your chosen perspective is the most effective.
Noah Flores
>The only part of the story that seemed to have been given any real attention was the rape scene.
You say that like that's a bad thing
But no really, thanks.
Thomas Long
...
Blake Wilson
...
Ian Reed
...
Brayden Howard
...
Aaron Russell
...
Luis Gutierrez
I've always had a fantasy of Carlos fucking Jill while she spends two days passed out in the Clocktower.
If you ever do more I would be happy to read such a story.
Joshua Thomas
...
Charles Morgan
With her entirely out cold?
Ryan Reed
...
Nolan Hall
...
Luke Hall
He's never going to do more with Jill. He's just going to spam these two stories over and over again because he has nothing else going for him.
Michael Morris
...
Anthony Butler
Mostly. Sometimes it involves her getting pregnant and not knowing how after she escapes, other times with Carlos getting infected as a result and becoming a zombie.
Colton Robinson
There's this Rebecca story I want to finish up first before doing something with Jill again
Nicholas Myers
>Mostly. Sometimes it involves her getting pregnant and not knowing how after she escapes
That's kind of hot in a weird way.
She could think it was Nemesis' love child for all she knows
Matthew Adams
So why exactly are you spamming this story over and over again? Is it because you want to reconfirm how shitty you are? You should spend more time actually writing stories instead of shilling them. Maybe you'd actually improve.
Josiah James
...
Jayden Evans
Did life not go the way you had planned it?
Dominic Sanchez
...
Michael Nguyen
You should be asking yourself that question. Especially being a "writer" who spends more time spamming Sup Forums than actually, ya know, writing.
Jackson Young
...
Thomas Sanchez
I just put up some new stuff. What is your problem?
Jordan Gonzalez
...
Nathaniel Baker
Then how bout you link to your new stuff instead of constantly spamming the same two stories over and over again like some kind of mongoloid.
Benjamin Flores
...
Jacob Ross
Why not link to some of that next time you make a thread?
It would also make it easier for people to see if you're getting better and offer helpful critique.