ITT: we write quips for Marvel flicks

ITT: we write quips for Marvel flicks

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=_V2sBURgUBI
youtube.com/watch?v=iF5e3is7ls8
twitter.com/AnonBabble

-insert Buffy/Angel/Firefly quirks literally no one IRL uses-

It's you who's out Gobby! Out of your mind!

>"Tell that to Zod's snapped neck"
>*que laugh track
>Executive Producer Joss Whedon

you could have someone catch caps shield and be like wohoho oh no and drop it to the ground like its all heavy like thors hammer and then be like lol jk guys haha

Ant man: "'spiderman' huh? I would have guessed that you had 8 legs"

Spiderman: "Nope, just 3. The third is for your mum"

Thanos: At last, we finally meet.
Iron Man: Who let this grapefruit in?

>Thanos completes the infinity gauntlet and morphs into a giant god-monster being
>Wanda: "Definitely swipe left"
>Vision looks at her confused

that's good

You know what happens to a frog that's struck by lightning?


The same thing that happens to everything else.

>BRAVO JOSS

>antman meets an angry hulk
"Whoa big guy"
>grows picks hulk up to say
"Hey little guy"
Pay me

>Thanos completes the Guantlet & powers up
>All hope is lost
>Out of nowhere a jar of Granny's Peach Tea hits him in the face, blinding him & giving the Avengers an opening

not a quip but I kek'd nonetheless

>Did you just throw a giant frisbee at me? The fuck...? I'm supposed to be a spider, not a dog

>The third is for your mum

You almost won, but you forgot one thing. A spider can bite.

>puts on mask
>"Now, I have become Sony Motion Picture Studio's second attempted Spider-Man reboot!"

>not ginormous

Black Widow: Whoa there mister grabby, watch the hands!
Bruce Banner: Trust me. I'm a doctor.

Antman is insignificANT

Thor: I refuse to work with that fucking nigger in your iron man suit tony

lol

okay. legitimately laughed at this

Antman uses the giant pill
Black Widow says to Bruce:You could borrow one of those, big boy ;)

Captain America speaking to Spider-Man
>"Reddit? I'll put it on the list"

...

have spiderman catch some civilian and swing them out the way dramatically

afterwards the lady hurries off with a disgusted look on her face, and spiderman calls after her "hey, its not my fault! its the spandex!"

Get a load of this angry, white, male . He doesn't even realize its 2016! Empire Strikes back is a really old movie now.

" Hey look it's Barney the Purple Dinosaur!" --- Spiderman

Shoots web at Thanos. Thanos Ducks, looks at Spider Man and fucking Vaporizes him!

Time to Reboot Spider Man

>after a rocky start, the moment has finally arrived.

Iron Man: AVENGERS ASSEMBLE!

>Avengers proceed to form up and assume silly poses while dramatic music plays.

>Villian stands smugly with arms crossed.

Villain to Avengers: Aww you guys are cute. Where's barbie?

Why do marveldrones get so worked up if you mock their precious quips? I thought you liked """"""""""fun"""""""""""""""""

Thanos: So we meet at last, Starlord. You're not so different, you and I.
Starlord: We're totally different!
Thanos: Tell that to Ronan's snapped pride.
Starlord: *attacks*

Wew lad

>So Antman, are you small *everywhere*?
>Now is not the time Spidey
>Call me Spidey one more time you motherfucking cock juggling AIDS infested homo

Could see this happening

Wasp: Do they really have to call him black panther? That seems a little tasteless.

Ant Man: Tasteless? Seriously? Have you looked at our costumes?

...

good but a bit above pg mate, make it G

...

I saved it too user

jfc. are you whedon?

Black Widow: Calm down, Big Guy!

Hulk: ROAUGEHGRYITITHYE

>Hulk then punches BW, killing her instantly

Iron Man: Well, I didn't see that coming...

Thanos: Hey guys, I'm over *HERE* you know!

>Thor then arrives riding a lightning bolt, crushing Hawkeye as he sets down on the battlefield

Thor: Looks like somebody let the DOGS OUT!

>Starlord then releases a kennel full of hungry hounds with Rocket Raccoon riding Scooby-Doo

Thanos: Good lord... *sighs*

But seriously, isn't "black panther" redundant? I thought a panther was a black feline by definition.

Spiderman: CHUMBAWAMBA!

Black Panther: Unga Bunga Ook Bunga Bunga *throws spear*

black panther: black widow, show me dem titties girl

scarlet witch: i'll show you my tits nigger-man

black panther: shut up bitch i wasn't talkin' to you

i think its for visual effect

like "Golden Dawn", "Blazing Sun", "Blue Waters" etc etc

What is the "TONY HELP" meme? It's probably the only dank maymay I haven't seen an explanation for yet.

You think they'll call Raimi for script supervision again?

>Gee I guess this really was his Doomsday™
>youtube.com/watch?v=_V2sBURgUBI
>Script by Joss Whedon

>Black widow rushes into the room where all the other Avengers are standing around

Black Widow: I got here as fast as I could, sorry about the wait

Hawkeye: Don't worry, you'll lose it

>Iron Man high fives Hawkeye, Captain America lets out a hearty chuckle

(Capt America punches someone)
>taste the freedom

*Tubthumping starts playing*

Kek

You would say it too if you got the chance.

*black widow shows up*

Hawkeye: she's with you?
Cap: I thought she was with you
Hawkeye: lol, what a slut

I don't get it

wait = weight

She got "here" as in, she acquired it.

would pay to see, but Disney will never do it because of muh fat shaming

>Thor: You're a filthy fucking shitskin black panther sieg fucking heil 14/88
And that's why they wouldn't want Raimi back

Thanos: You defy ultimate power. With the Infinity Gems™ I have control over all matter, energy, space, and time. I will smash you into atoms. Not even the memories of you will exist.
Starlord: Cool. You get those from a cracker jack box or something?

ITT: mad DCucks

Captain America: Take that you slut! What a cuckold!!! JUST! You're a big guy!!!!!!

>Iron mans suit is damaged
Are you alright tony?
>beeping starts
Watch out I'm gonna pull an Isis

>Spiderman sees a suicide bomber about to walk into a building

>Covers him in webbing, hangs him over a light pole for the cops to come

>Says "How do you plan on being with 72 virgins when you can't handle one?"

That actually sounds like something he would say.

But seriously, what if there was a character who talked only in dank internet meems?

Why are you DCucks so angry to make these threads?
The DCEU is a failure, just accept it and move on.

Or maybe your just retarded?

Why?
Is the DCEU not a failure?
Are DCucks not angry?

fuark. i can hear it now

Nazi Thor when?

Would complement nice the black-hating magic girl they have right now in the MCU.

>Hey vulture why don't you answer my calls?
>What calls Spider-Man?
>the ones after you dropped me off from your van
>but I never
>got you faggot!

user HELP

me figure out what this meme means

Is it bad I actually want to see this?

>Villain goes off on a generic tangent about world domination and God being dead
>Deadpool literally tips fedora

>Falcon winds up to punch someone
Spiderman: Falcon P-
>Falcon stops his punch and turns around
Falcon: Don't
>Captain America looks around confused

Hee, that would actually work. It's cute coming from the new Spidey.

Yeah
But it's funny when we do it

But that would expose his secret identity, as there are only 10 people in the city that are virgins that are older than 15.

he always needs tony to save him

youtube.com/watch?v=iF5e3is7ls8

>Infinity War
>Doctor Strange is at the Avengers Tower
>Him and Tony are discussing plans for some shit
>Spiderman just chillin there
>Ant-Man comes up to meet him, shaking his hand and etc...
>"Oh my God, you're Spiderman!"
>Spiderman is like "Yeah, no shit, Sherlock"
>Tony and Strange turn around "Yes?"
>Everyone looks around confused
>Reddit jizzes

Go to bed Feige. Nobody wants this

This could make it into the movie ffs

>Stark and Captain America drink coffee atop Stark Tower
>Cap: this coffee's really good
>Yeah, Starkbucks formula never fails
>I really don't like the way you change everything you buy to fit your image
>Oh really? What, you're gonna downvote me?
>*look of honest wonder*
>Come on, you think the Samsung Galaxy I gave you had that Stark app for no reason? By the way, "Capwn -underscore- America"? No wonder I knifed you in Black Ops.
>*mouth agape, looks on* - "Playboy?"
>Well, my shottie gave you the double spread, didn't it?

Tony: So we've finalized the plans for the new Avengers Operations Center, my guys are working on clearing up some red tape, but the next step is to decide which city to build in.
Bruce: How about somewhere in Europe?
Tony: No this one's going stateside, what else?
Black Widow: How about DC? With SHIELD we could--
Tony: *shaking head* DC? Never. DC is fucking garbage. *looks at camera*

>Black Widow: We need to be put in check Steve, this whole situation is getting out of control.
>Cap: And you need to put in the fucking oven, you filthy fucking kike. Hitler did nothing wrong.
You can clearly see where Raimi had a hand in CWs script

>(Claps)
Just horrible you'll make it in Hollywood yet

I love this Raimi meme, but I don't get it is he really racist or something? None of the Spider-Man films were actually like that

In Civil War when Cap was fighting the special forces in Berlin I expected some quip about fighting Germans again after so long.

Antman:let me deal with black panther cap
Cap:alright don't hurt him
Antman:it's fine I'll just put him in my spam folder where he belongs
Cap:spam folder
Antman:with all the other royal niggers who want my money.

>looking down the hold afterward
>Hawkeye: I was just about to try that

Or something like that, better then "Huh, let's go."

...

bingo

Wanda: "I am your density!"

>your just retarded?

Her line was good though, his was shit.

He could team up with Nazi Captain America in Civil War

>every time Cap recovers his shield after throwing it at someone
Cap: "That's mine!"