“I’ve got my secret here. I don’t tell anybody my secret,” confides Brian, still sitting by his piano. “I have a secret… I’ll tell you anyway: I don’t have any sex, OK? The secret is abstaining from orgasm. An Einsteinian formula that if you abstain from having an orgasm for, say, 10 years, you create a void in your brain. In other words, if you don’t express and orgasm for 10 years, it’s a long time, right? Most people think two weeks without an orgasm’s a long time.
“And I did that, y’know? My dad told me in high school: ‘Son, now you’re gonna be going through a lot of hell as you grow up, and the one thing you should never do is you should not have orgasms and masturbate and you should not fuck with girls.’
thats stupid as shit. if anything its just giving him extreme sexual frustration to use as inspiration.
Jaxon Price
No wonder he indulged in so many other physical pleasures such as drugs and food.
It all makes sense now
Alexander Bennett
sexual repression is a dumb meme
Cooper White
A lot of people create as an outlet for sexual frustration
Evan Wright
WHAT THE FUCKKKK?!?!!!!!!!???!!?!?
Brody Sanchez
>repressing yourself and expecting to be mentally sane
Jaxson Gomez
yeah and thats stupid. He is creating self induced sexual frustration. Thats like slitting your wrists so you can write nine inch nails songs.
Jaxon Martinez
>mfw all I had to do was stop masturbating to become a great musician
Brody White
While I shouldn't disagree with quads, I think there is something to it. While 10 years is fucking nuts, I find not acting on every sexual urge makes want to do something productive. I'm sure other people have felt the same way.
Brody Sanchez
Well yeah. Its probably helpful to skip a day or two sometimes but 10 years is ridiculous. Skipping a day can give you more testosterone/energy but skipping 10 years only gives you a degree in pseudoscience. Also those are some nice 4s.
Austin Sanchez
>wanted to always give Brian a hug >he would probably ejaculate at even the slightest physical contact
Now I'm not so sure.
Alexander Hill
pic related
He came.
Jonathan Richardson
I've tried to stop masturbating for several reasons. I'm not going to try to push any of my beliefs or ideas down anyone's throat. But I do think that there might something to going a time (weeks not months) without jerking it. I feel like it can be motivator to do something. But again, 10 years is crazy.
Logan Cooper
what the fuck
Noah Sanders
He is truly a pure being.
Evan Parker
Everything in moderation.
Carter Carter
>My dad told me in high school: ‘Son, now you’re gonna be going through a lot of hell as you grow up, and the one thing you should never do is you should not have orgasms and masturbate and you should not fuck with girls.’
fucking excuse me
Ian Bailey
wtf i hate sex now
coil did something like this also but not for 10 years
Jaxon Stewart
But masturbating is the only joy I have in life
Jeremiah Smith
this is a satirical article right?
Alexander Long
This isn't real, right?
Ayden Watson
>tfw you thought you were capable of writing music but you had an orgasm by accident 6 years ago
Liam Edwards
It's not satirical, it's an article from the mid-nineties where he talks the most candidly about how he feels about his bandmates:
>"I’ll work on my own, solo, before I work with a bunch of guys that don’t give a shit about me. ... there’s probably five or six real good reasons why they don’t like me. One is they’re jealous. Two: erm, they’re assholes. Three: they’re too businessmen and too businesslike. And four: there’s no respect. They have no respect for me. They just spit at me and kick me, no respect at all. I say, ‘Well, fuck it then!’ ... Carl is my brother, but Carl is an asshole. I love Carl, I love his singing, but he’s an asshole to me. Those guys are assholes. I oughta beat the hell out of them all. I dunno, I’d probably get beat up if I tried that."
Ryan Campbell
>Those guys are assholes. I oughta beat the hell out of them all. I dunno, I’d probably get beat up if I tried that.
Best part.
Ryan Richardson
Was Dennis born with all the sexual energy that was supposed to be distributed amongst the three brothers?
Alexander Jones
>that Seinfeld episode where George stops having sex and becomes a genius
Luke Peterson
this is what I thought of immediatley
Isaiah James
>you'll never team up with Brian to beat the shit out of the Beach Boys and go drink a few pints afterwards Why is life so unfair bros
Christian Nguyen
stop masturbating
Robert Mitchell
I wouldn't even think of trying to beat up Dennis
Hunter Gray
Dennis is a bro and would help Brian out
Jackson Gomez
This is the exact inspiration i needed to fully commit to no fap. Friendly reminder that your semen is mana and she-devils were sent from hell to drain you.
Blake Davis
in context that picture does make a lot of sense
Eli Thomas
The backstory behind this is so sad. I think he still wasn't in a great headspace when this stuff was going down and I think he was spurred in by Mike and Carl being kind of mean to him but that's why it's so sad.
Juan Bailey
Digits prove he'll live for another ten years
Benjamin Jones
...
Eli Ortiz
Well there you go
Thomas Foster
They were talking about fucking 10 year olds
Aiden Richardson
HOLY SHIET
Gavin Mitchell
Well shit, didn't expect that to work Glad I could help our benevolent god
Dylan Taylor
>George complains about being a failure and tfw no gf every episode >has sex everyday >not having sex for a couple of days makes him a genius poor consistency
Chase Murphy
maybe he doesn't masturbate when in a relationship
Ayden Evans
Shit, It can't be true, I'm 20 right now, that means that I will have to wait until my thirties to be a god among men.
Samuel Thompson
...
Michael Ramirez
These satirical articles stopped being funny a very long time ago.
Owen Richardson
The article was published in a music magazine that doesn't do satire.
Breaking my no fap commitment on this Sup Forums post. Can life get any better?
Jack Turner
The reason he's lived so long regardless of everything is because of NoFap.
Meme magic confirms this
Brody Allen
Yes
Austin Hill
This
Gabriel Powell
He definitely wasn't in the best headspace then. He had just come out of the whole Landy thing but he still was struggling mentally. Also Carl had just thrown a wrench in Brian's plan to produce a new Beach Boys album. Brian actually patched things up with Carl before he died though, from what I've heard.
Jordan Hughes
...
Andrew Morris
>I oughta beat the hell out of them all Well, at least he beat the hell out of Mike.
Jose Lewis
I'm not into the nofap thing because I think it's ridiculous (and it seems to be pushed by christfags). But honestly, the less I get involved with sex related thing, the better I feel (which doesn't make my gf happy). Young people who can't get pussy don't do themselves a favor by watching porn. The more you watch it, the more the need is present. This is what creates frustration (and in my case, a lack of motivation and depression). If you just abstain, the need will fade away.
Austin Torres
Nofap actually started out as something secular nerds did because they either had some sort of internet porn addiction, or bought into the bro science idea of it makes you more manly and have more testosterone if you dont jerk off every day.
Christians have been telling fuckers they would grow hair on their palms if they jerk off too much for years so i could see how it could eventually be infiltrated by christtards.
Ayden Gomez
also ive been shitposting on Sup Forums since the beginning, i actually remember the thread were the word fap became a meme, its a sound effect from a hentai .
Memories.
Bentley James
no fap makes sense when and only when someone is addicted to porn/masturbation otherwise its just placebo effect, like when someone cuts out gluten when they dont have a gluten allergy and they feel "so much healthier" afterwords
Juan Morgan
underrated
Lucas Campbell
BASED
Joshua Foster
>or bought into the bro science idea of it makes you more manly and have more testosterone if you dont jerk off every day. have you created pet sounds? if not you should try nofap m8
Sebastian Clark
If this were true the bandcamp and SoundCloud threads here wouldn't be so shit.
James Adams
We have to preserve our precious bodily fluids
Adam Moore
this
not to mention nofap is a jewish scheme to promote casual sex
"Stop acting self-sufficient, and force yourself to rely on others instead for sexual pleasure"
Connor Reyes
If Christians invented it (have been doing it for years as you said), then it's the seculartards who have started infiltrating, you idiot
Jordan Gray
>implying the BandCamp/SoundCloud guys are abstaining from masturbation
Isaiah Walker
No wonder Marilyn cheated on him with their bodyguard
