Going on first cruise in January on Royal Caribbeans Harmony of the Seas, and we're doing Eastern Caribbean side...

Going on first cruise in January on Royal Caribbeans Harmony of the Seas, and we're doing Eastern Caribbean side. (Bahamas, St. Thomas and St. Maarten)
Anyone here been on a cruise before and do you have any recommendations/ideas/cautions?

Other urls found in this thread:

cruisecritic.com/harmony-of-the-seas-gay-cruises_cl32-sh983-cs24/mra/
twitter.com/AnonBabble

Who builds a fucking waterpark on a boat?

Royal Caribbean.

That is one sweet boat

it's boring

Yeah, I'm totally fired up about it, but want to make sure I do everything as right as possible.

Yeah, looks wicked boring.

Touch. Nothing.

Disease-spreading cunts usually touch everything and spread their disease around ships like wildfire.

Wash your hands like a motherfucker.
Breathe lightly around faggots coughing, if not through your shirt to try block any pathogens.

Beyond that, try not to die or get mugged.

Cruises, literally cities in miniature.
All the downsides and none of the upsides.

Ok, Purell it is! Good point, I work on a psych ward at a hospital in Salem MA so I'm used to that type of caution, but strangely I never thought about it on the boat.

Buy the alcohol/drink package. Fuckers charge $5 for an 8oz rockstar. Plus, you can drink all you can ever wish for. Especially the exotic drinks you don't really ask for at your local dive bar.

Royal Caribbean have hand soap at the entrance to every room so don't worry about it. Just be wary of opening bathroom doors

And be careful with off ship food. The food on the ship is fucking incredible. You literally get treated like a celebrity.

Oh yeah, off ship eating can be risky if you go to some street vendors.
They might not have the strict regulations that some places do.

Also, for the love of fuck, make sure you are back to the cruise early.
They will leave you behind if you don't get back in time.

it's like a floating hotel; dreadfully boring

I am pretty sure you could go down those slides for at least a few hours.

Or watch the hot teens go down them for a few hours.

Yup, we did book the drink package, $48/day per person. I will easily decimate that by noon every day.

I just got back from a carnival cruise. People are either joking or ignorant about it being boring. I had a better time just being at sea. They had comedians, food everywhere and casinos and shit. I didn't think it would be as fun as it was.

Yeah, I am a little bit worried about lack of FDA (Food & Drug Aministration for our non-American readers) regulations on the islands

They frown on shitting off the side of the ship.

How old are you? 65?

I was getting $15 triple Patron margaritas for a $3 tip. It's totally with it. Even just getting shit like smoothies in the morning with a free steak and eggs for breakfast.

WTF are you talking about?

Super hot outside and freezing AC inside. You are very likely to get a violent throat ache. Prepare accordingly. Aboard medicines and doc are overpriced.

Fuck, well, scratch that off my itinerary

Isn't that the gay love boat?

Yeah, I'm not focusing on their comments.

great ship..heading off next week on her.. this will be my 43rd cruise.

Cruises are for old people.

lets go sailing, it'll be fast and fun and exciting and adventurous and we'll learn a metric fuckton of interesting shit

No I fit a better idea, let's spend even more money, and go for a ride on a floating parking lot, that's another rucking city, so that we'll never have to feel like we even left home.


Only way a cruise makes sense is if they medically screened every passenger and crew to be 100% clean and disease free, then turned the whole ship into an orgy.

its not boring unless your a faggot..

Yes, it's the "gay love boat"

take drugs, only way to make it interestionggg

How much money do you make user?

I've been as a crew member in the engine department. Seafarers like to be drunk during their watch, don't feel too safe.

Bring a gun you might need it.

Are you fucking retarded nigger?

Very true, bring bottled water to your room. They charge you like 4 bucks for theirs that the leave in the room. It's annoying, but bring drinks to your room when you can. I spent about an hour just going to all the bars. Just bringing cokes and water bottles to my room for later.

Its bretty expensive to go much easier to just say its boring. Then again if it was my last 5000 I wouldn't see value in it either.

Between me and my girl we do alright, she's a psychic in Salem and October is her bank month.

They're great for urban shut-ins who don't know how to travel.


Like the retard worried about the risks if maybe eating non-FDA approved food in another country.

lolololol

nothing boring about it.. hot women.. relaxatiom.. parties.. internet.. swimming.. musicals.. bowling.. arcade. pool.. movies.. performancea.. contests.. yea, real boring. if you are bored om these ships, you might as well kill yourself now

She ever gave you a reading?

Excellent point. They have an "Evian package" Unlimited Evian for the cruise at $45.
Worth it?

You can't even check out all the lolis walking around the ship and in their bikinis except near the pool. They section away the little kids and the teenagers in their own little area.

no, its not. i have been cruising since i was 10.. always fun nigger

Gay all day!

cruisecritic.com/harmony-of-the-seas-gay-cruises_cl32-sh983-cs24/mra/

Why the fuck would I want to do any of that shit I can do anywhere, on a fucking boat?

enough to cruise 2x a year with fam / friends. do well for IT Consulting

Nope, been together 8 years and would never allow her to read me. Not sure why, but so much time has passed now that she would probably have a hard time reading and filtering out her actual knowledge of me in general.
Would make giving a non-biased reading more difficult I would think.

Apparently. pointing at sluts and shouting 'LAND HO!' or 'IT'S A WHALE!' when pointing a plus size in the pool is offensive and childish.

Who knew?

make sure you make some friends on the cruise, youre going to be with th same people for a week. its boring being on a cruise when you have no one to hang out with. dont spend your money on the casino if they have one on your ship, ive seen people blow through 10k in one night

lol Nice! I will pass that on to my friend Christian Day.

>mysides.jpg

>or get mugged.
on the ship ? didn't know that was a thing, i've done 2 cruises so far. it can be dangerous round the ports tho

this, beer also helps if you happen to get see sick

you also have to pay for wifi so have fun with that

But you can get a job, and work in that area, and have them all to urself.

>Ok everyone, line up, today before we get in the pool it's a quick health inspection...
>Fingers in all their little butts.

Try not to fall off the ship. Besides being cut to pieces by the props or eaten by the sharks that follow in their wake looking for scraps it's really hard to hear your cries for help over all the various things going on, and the attendants are instructed not to hear you as stopping those bitches costs a ton

I have this fantasy of just living aboard one if I should ever win the lotto

yeah, don't lose sight of your wife/daughter/gf whatever. People go missing on those cruises, and the cruise lines try to cover it up.

you are supposed to be on vacation, sweet child o mine

This time will be just me and my girlfriend. We've been to Vegas twice and are both actually better at financial restraint than we thought. But yes, there is a casino on board and we'll probably both limit ourselves to $300 apiece to lose. If we blow through that than we walk out.

I've done the oasis twice and planning the Harmony for next year.

Fuck on the balcony whenever possible. It feels great.

Beyond that, check out the spa and potentially picking up a pass to the thermal suite. On a ship with that many people, it is nice being able to go into the thermal suite and relax in the sauna.

Can happen on and off ship.

Rooms can sometimes be broken in to.
So I suggest you keep everything valuable in some safe place, on you, or elsewhere.

Better yet, take a diaper with you, put some chocolate on it, put precious items in the diaper.
Put up Do Not Disturb sign.

Unless you happen to get that one weird thief in to scat, diapers, or both, you'll be absolutely safe.

A few beers help with seasickness? Sweet! Light beers? Dark beers? Ales? any in particular?

What do you mean? The staff?

well, my brain goes into panic if it feels movement without registering it with the eyes. So any alcohol helps with reducing the movement you brain feels.
Just works that way with me.

thx, didn't consider it actually. but i guess having dunno how many K of people can bring a lot of bad sheep.

because it drags you around to resorts around the world.. if you are too poor, we understand

If water and soft drinks are included with your drink package. Don't buy the water one. Those are unlimited, they just count the alcohol.

If you've never been on the ocean you owe it to yourself at least once to try it. Not necessarily on a cruise ship, but if that's the best you can do so be it. But being out in the middle of the ocean, no land in sight, is a completely different experience. After 6 years in the Navy I can tell you it's not an experience you ever forget, especially if you can get outside at night on a clear sky with no lights.

Yeah, the only reason we're doing this is that my girlfriend had a killer month in October in Salem and this is pretty much throw-away money

Each to their own. When I travel, I prefer to arrive there fast and enjoy the location for what it is.
Cruises were fun when I was a kid, but now all I see is lots of fat people enjoying mindless distractions.

> especially if you can get outside at night on a clear sky with no lights.
I can do that on land where I live no dramas

I think most of you who do enjoy cruises haven't done much in life. I'd much rather fly to Vegas for a week than waste the money on a cruise.

>resorts

Oh god it just gets better and better lol

Ad hominems wont save your flawed argument.

Alcohol is expensive, put Jack daniels in (original) Listerine bottle. Put vodka in current listerine bottle with green and vlue food coloring. You will save a lot of money as the deinks are usually 11 dollars a piece.

Yeah, that bummed me out a bit since you can get free wifi at your local McDonald's, but like said... I'm on vacation so, I'll go without.

We actually did get a balcony room facing the ocean for just that reason, too funny.
We passed on the Spa option when booking, but you think it may be worth it?

failed argument? naw, just telling you how it is.. notbing ro argue.. if you ate too poor to cruise, then goto reno or new jersey

You can save money by not doing the excursions and just rent a moped and drive around the islands. Dont eat off the ship, dont be late (they will leave you).

That diaper idea is pretty fucking clever

I went to Vegas for 2 days, then went on a cruise. So... Your fucking retarded. Traveling the world is awesome. No matter how you do it, you fuckin queer.

Yeah it's pretty awesome, I sailed 2 transatlantic crossings and once from BVI thru Panama and out to Hawaii when I was younger.

The experience was awesome enough on its own, & didn't even need a casino and a magician and a nightclub to keep from getting bored.

Triggered

Why in fuck would I ever go to either of those places, even if I were poor?

did you really just "lololol" on Sup Forums?

I've done the thermal suite both times on the Oasis and it is one of my favorite parts of the ship. It depends on how much you enjoy saunas though. You can always do a tour of the spa/thermal suite on the first day to see if it is something you might be interested in. I think it was $200 per couple for unlimited use during the week and a signature couples treatment.

You literally have to worry about nothing, people will clean room, you have "free" food at all times of days. You can choose how to spend your time on the ship independently, you could try different fun things everyday, or decide to spend all your day at the jacuzzi or at the pool for the whole vacation.
It's really fking awesome i guarantee.
Have fun OP

How it is, is so boring you need all that shit to keep the fat midwesterners preoccupied.

It's the ultimate shit way of traveling and seeing and engaging in absolutely fucknothing of value.

It's by and for the kind of trashy uncultured retard that thinks Vegas is a a place you go for a vacation, and not just because some fuckibg convention you're sent to attend is being held there.

Bring plenty and share.

Also you'll encounter a lot fking rich fags in there, have manners OP

Yeah, and that should give you an idea how old I am, which should give you an idea of how long I've been here doing it. You can keep your fuckin teenage keks, I'll laugh at you when your dumb kids question them.

St Martin is nice. There's a nude beach there if you're into that kind of thing.

Would love to! Any advice on how to bring any or score any on the islands?

Weed. Don't get caught with it when your're off the ship. The Caribbean nations have draconian drug laws.

>Anyone here been on a cruise before and do you have any recommendations/ideas/cautions?

>...
>Rohr eins bis drei bewässern.
>Klappen öffnen.
>...

Wear cheap Old Navy flip flops. Cut out a small hole on the bottom. Kinda dig it out so you can fit a joint/adderal/ecstasy/ what ever you want. Or, ask locals on port. They usually come up to you, honestly.

this

actually giving a shit about `non fda food`abroad? are u fucking serious? op must be either

1) in their 60s (and never been anywhere)
2) in their 20s but tries to act like a 60 yo
3) in their 20s who is terrified of leaving the house

Bring a watch, you wont be carrying your cell cuz no service & there's no clocks anywhere.

Or, I got sick in Jamaica at Margaritaville from the ice they used...

>free at mcdonalds

you fuckless faggot, the cruise ship has no wired internet connection, it all has to be sent thru expensive wireless signal