/para/ - paralympics general

7-1 Edition

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youtube.com/watch?v=NY7Zp96jYZM

Schedule
>results.paralympics.channel4.com/paralympic/schedules/overview.html

List of sports
>paralympics.channel4.com/sports/

Streams
>paralympics.channel4.com/watch-live/
>youtube.com/user/ParalympicSportTV

Other urls found in this thread:

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special_Olympics
paralympics.channel4.com/watch-live/
youtube.com/watch?v=NY7Zp96jYZM
twitter.com/NSFWRedditImage

>Starting a new thread literally immediately

By the way, in that 2012 advert, does anyone know who the creepy cripple at 0:55 is? And what's wrong with him?

ib4 Braziltards think that this also makes everyone forget about 7-1

posting medal table for NATIONAL PRIDE

is there a wheelchair obsessed norwegian in these threads?

>Only three gold medals ahead of UKRAINE

no but i'll have nightmares now

>IMAGE RELATED

>wheelchair obsessed norwegian

Aner ikke hva du snakker om fåvæ.

>swimkraine
they're just the america of the paralympics, we'll be fine lad

Tenkte jeg det ikke. Samler du ammunisjon til 4 år fremover i disse dager?

>mexico in top 10

Can someone remind me why we care about the semen slurping reuglar Olympics?

nobody in this thread knows friend, i think there was one american in the entire last general, paralympics are GOAT

Hvorfor skulle jeg gjǿre det?

Collateral effect of drug wars

Pinata-related accidents, and lazy Mexicans who buy wheelchairs so they don't have to stand up and then just sort of went with it.

>Watching the spastic Olympics

kys losers.

>snakker

I'd like to snack on her arse.

Ok m8

>skulle

That's what Mark 'Psychopath on the Cycle Path' Cavendish did to that other rider in the Olympics: break his skull.

They are all unironically more athletic than you fat fuck

i love how fast the stoned kiwi comes through in the last 20, it's interesting that he starts like that

>Mark "recruiting for the korean paralympic team" Cavendish

Do people literally not know the difference between the Paralympics and the Special Olympics, or are we just being memed, persistently, with the exact same joke over and over again?

Paralympics = physical disabilities, eg missing limbs or blindness
Special Olympics = hurr durr well done you wore clothes today have a medal

>spastic Olympics

...ah, you mean the Special Olympics. For the mentally handicapped, and followed by inferior subhumans such as you. Pic very related.

>3rd place
Proud of Dad.

>being memed with the exact same joke over and over again
welcome to Sup Forums lad

also spastic is the technical(derogatory) term for people with cerebral palsy and such so he's not actually wrong, but yes you're being memed

He's a double amputee, he's always going to have shittier starts but be better later on since he doesn't have the asymmetry of thrust the single amputees have. But he can't push out of the blocks well.

>Special Olympics

Is that a thing or just a Sup Forums meme?

To be fair, "spastic" literally means a person with cerebral palsy, which would indeed qualify them for the Paralympics, and not the Special Olympics.

>tfw I am samefagging one of these posts because it only occurred to me after I'd posted

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special_Olympics

>or just a Sup Forums meme?

For Trumpo's supporters, yes.

its a mostly american thing where they wheel out derps and then snicker behind their hands as they dribble and poo themselves on an athletics track

yeah but he starts with 1 arm up which is slower. To start like that and then still be running 100m in 11 seconds is pretty incredible. I wonder how his top speed stacks up against ABs

>To start like that and then still be running 100m in 11 seconds is pretty incredible
Yeah, I'm not sure his blades allow him to start normally though.
The guy sounds like a lad though.

he's such a bro, i hope they get him on the last leg, i'd watch that. I also hope he dominates the 200/400m, unsure which he's competing in or if its both

I bet they felt that all the way to Pyongyang: and there wasn't even a nuclear test scheduled for that day.

But Dame Sarah Storey caused an earthquake in my trousers.

I believe both, the last leg interviewed him after the 100m and showed it today and he said he prefers the 200 and 400 to the 100. I think he's set for the 200. 400 depends on if he can maintain the speed for the distance.

I like the look of those wooden pots to keep the medals in.

Not even London had something like that; probably just something you'd keep a necklace or watch in. Or a Knighthood or OBE.

Dame Sarah Storey definitely registers high on the erector scale :^)

By the way, is The Last Leg any good currently? I know it was made for the Paralympics, and was GOAT during 2012, but when they kept it going and just discussed news stories, I gave up because it went full John Oliver and just descended into, "Here are the opinions our audience picked up from the Guardian website! We're so brave for saying those opinions!" If it's good again, I'll have to start watching it again, but if it's still cancer, I probably won't bother.

london literally just had a medal case ye

I'd like one of those coats.

Be comfy in winter, they would.

Good again, no politics except one le drumpf joke

theres a little bit of cancer but overall its pretty chill and does actually resonate well with disabled people so they know they can make pretty risque jokes and get away with it

>Ukraine

EXPLAIN?

Oh, I watched it after 2012 London, because it's satirical. Like "Private Eye" magazine, and "Have I Got News For You", I like something that takes the piss out of those in public life: especially politicians who think they have the right to have ideas above their stations. Satire bursts their bubbles, and makes them look inferior. Which of course, is what they are. Pic extremely related.

Swimming has even more medals than the olympics

Ukraine dominate certain swimming classes and actually brought a massive team (third or fourth biggest i think) of legit parathletes to the games. They won't catch us but they're a serious para nation and aren't there by fluke, they'll probably hold third

it is weird how some nations try really hard to be good at certain sports but yeah, ukraines paralympic program is huge

Fantastic; sounds like I can handle it then. Thank you.

Is that meant to be Lewis Hamilton?

...that, and Vlad 'State Dope' Putain's Russkies have been banned from these Paralympics. And hopefully all other major sporting competitions until Putain admits to wholesale cheating, stops being an inferior subhuman, stops annexing Ukraine, and stops having his mid-life crisis.

I bet losing the Ice Hockey gold to Canada still stings, eh Vlad? Good. Montreal only finished paying for 1976 Montreal several years ago. $51 billion down the shitter for Sochi, eh? The cost of your rail link alone was the total cost of 2012 London: £9 billion.

See you in Pyeongchang, Russkies. If none of you fuck up and take the dope Putain orders you to, that is...!

Nah, Hamilton doesn't hit walls. Certainly not ones imagined by a mentally handicapped orange-skinned subhuman with a dead animal on his head.

...Are you on drugs? Your posts are all really fucking weird.

>Are you on drugs?

...are you?

Oh shit, I just watched an interview with one of GB's weightlifting athlete, now I'm crying. I'm pathetic.

who /zanardi/ here

what's happening today?

>England inbred program at work

Loads of athletics
Cycling blind pursuit and time trials + mixed team sprint
More blind football
More lifting
Rowing finals
Umpteen swimming races
25m pistols in shooting
Table tennis
Women's triathlon
Wheelchair basketball groups
Wheelchair tennis early rounds

>ukraine at third
kek

She could show me

Here. Is he on today?

>under 11 seconds

Rahcel Morris wins gold in the rowing. GB representation in the next three finals as well

Rachel Morris, former hand-cycling gold medallist, is now a rowing gold medallist as well, for glorious GB.

Wasn't there an able-bodied athlete who went from rowing to another sport? Possibly Rebecca Romero? Is rowing just a really non-specialised sport, and if you can do something else, you can do rowing as well?

I think it's just rowing is really fucking painful so if you can handle it you can do anything

Blind tandem cycling is fun

what are we watching guys?

Cycling

...

Paralympics are comfy as fuck

stream? german tv is only streaming track today.

absolutely. sadly the threads are too comfy.

Channel 4 is in the OP but I think it's UK only, they stream nearly every sport.

>finally fixed my internet connection I can watch Paralympics now!
>WFT why there is only audio commentary on BBC site like it's 1940 again
and then I remembered that everything is on 4

Browsec for Chome, set GB location, clean cookies
>paralympics.channel4.com/watch-live/

I just noticed they use a tiny car to carry the disks from disk throw. How cute!

>tfw Hug only got silver

I don't get it, some of these 100m runners with arm defects could easily compete in the regular olympics. How does not having a hand stop you from running faster?

Fucks up your balance and upper body movement, arms are nearly as key as legs in running quickly.

>three golds in rowing

Does Britainnia, dare I say it, rule the waves?

Sure, I get it if you have half an arm missing, it would fuck up your balance.. But some of those guys were only missing a hand, or had defective hands. Just put some weighted glove on or something.

Fuck I am looking on runners, and almost all of them look totally normal. Legs, hands. Strange.

Cerebral palsy classes, they have coordination and muscle control problems.

What was the name of that cute blonde on the disc throwing just now? Jessica something...

100m sprint 10% eyesight look perfectly good. the girl from ireland was qt.

Gold medal and world record, good.

more more special qts

Jessica Heims?

Thank you, you she's cute.

These olympics are giving me such a fetish for amputees and wheelchairs. Should I feel bad?

How is Uzbekistan doing so good, last time I checked I thought they were memeing their way through and would drop behind the top 10 as like 80% of their medals were golds.

No. It's ok.

>wheelchairs
Do you have Norwegian relatives by any chance?

no. they need love too.

LENINE CUNHA

LET'S GO COMRADE

World record for GB in the velodrome, even with a shit start lel

>the city of British television

No, why do you ask? Wheelchairs are common in Norway?

There's one Norwegian with a wheelchair fetish who posts here a lot, he stalks the women basketball players.

>stops being an inferior subhuman, stops annexing Ukraine, and stops having his mid-life crisis.
Not gonna to happen. I expect heart attack or a
stroke sooner than this. Maybe assassination.

>Smelly Donald Dump needs a kick in the rump
>I hate his big farty head and his tie that is red
>He's mean to people that are brown and that gives me a big old frown
>His poopy old hair gives me a nightmare
>He should be kicked out of the race because I hate his big orange face XD
>Drumpf BTFO
It's the greatest show of all time

There was once this time at college where I saw a cute girl on a wheelchair pass me by.

I think that's where my thing for wheelchair-bound girls started.

>youtube.com/watch?v=NY7Zp96jYZM
Gets me emotional every time, fuck.