What keeps you going?

What keeps you going?

1 laugh > 100 Days trying to find it

My pacemaker

nothing really, i just sorta do nothing because i have no motivation. I'd probably kill myself if i didn't have this place and chess

Streaming. Pic unrelated.

I don't know at this point. 36 and lifelong suicidal so far. I guess the hope that things get better? And things have in the past. But things are pretty close to their worst currently. I'd love to end it, but something stops me every time. Maybe I'll just pull the trigger soon. That would be nice.

food. and tea and cigarettes. but mainly food.

The idea that I can do anything, whenever I can, however I want...
But... inspired on my rage I´m still just a rat in a cage... someday will be though...
And the ocassional hookup... yeah, that makes it worth it.

All you fucking depressed psychopaths. Fucking kill yourselves. I'm tired of reading your pathetic shit and so is eveyrone else. My advice?

Shut the fuck up and kill yourselves already. No one fucking cares. You bring nothing to this world. BOOHOO I HATE MY LIFE. Well go slice your fucking neck open. Everyone else who is trying to lead a productive life is tired of your shit. Hang yourself and shut the fuck up already. If you're not going to contribute to yourself or this world, slice your neck open ASAP.

Yo keep breathing guys

Im 31 and I wish i could hold on until 36. If i found a job maybe i could (I live in a shit tier nation). Im so pathetic but also unlucky...

Wish you well user.

Nobody was talking about being depressed faggot. This shit is about passion, what makes you do the things you do. Retard.

Pic related.

you have no clue what a psychopath is, you fucking downie

The fact that one day someone will most likely come and shoot me so i dont have to do it myself.

He all mad because he hasn't seen his penis since 16

^ if you callme that, your mom will die tonight

Four Hundred Thousand keks

moving to LA from EU and marry a latino girl

I'm not sure, I keep telling myself it's my mom and how devastated she would be, but I know she'd eventually sorta get over it.

Maybe my friends? but I only really have one friend that I see regularly and he's honestly a bit of a dick

I think I'm too much of a pussy to end it, it's easy enough to end your own life honestly, a fucking retard could pull it off after 10 minutes on google.

I constantly feel terrible, I don't see a future, I don't see myself becoming anything or doing anything worthwhile but I still can't seem to quite do it.

I just want to go away and disappear honestly.

whatever you say bitch.

If your bro's there's always Marijuana or hookers.

Sad

google terror management theory you god damn faggots

I don't know.

OP here.
What nation?

was raised christian, don't know much about god anymore but it was embedded into my head enough that i am genuinely afraid to die

Trump presidency. I gotta see how it plays out.

My family, Sup Forums and the fact that Trump won.

Smoking weed and drink a lot. Also I'm eating like a pig. Soon though.

OP here again.

This is a very broad question. I'm intersted in what motivates you or keeps you alive. Are you too much of a pussy to kill yourself? Are you a scholar? Does the thrill of discovery intrigue you t ono bounds? Are you a bodybuilder? Does the idea of beating your best on a monthly/quarterly basis amuse you? Are you a finance bro, do you want to make more than anyone else? Are you a "complacent" bro, do you feel that not running the rat race and just being contenct/happy is enough to keep you doing what you do?

TLDR: Not suicidal, what motivates you to do what you do/what keeps you from ending it all/what is your purpose?

stopped smoking newports but same. tea, food and weed, and satire

i hope you make alot of money user, because LA is one of the most expensive and crowded places to live

pussy
food
waiting for a change?!

Seinfeld keeps me going

i was thinking of this before i saw this thread tonight. back in middle school i met some of my closest friends and started experimenting with drugs and such. then in highschool i was getting fucked up daily with them and playing games not thinking about my future. then we graduated. well i barely graduated, started getting into harder drugs once they moved away. had a heart attack and was diagnosed with some heart issue where the vains in my chest leading to my heart tightened up and made it really hard for blood to pass through causing really bad pain. went to rehab where my only goal was to get sober. in and out of that shit for two years. now i live with my brothers. no gf, although i had sex 2 weeks ago. i dont feel like i have anything to do anymore. ill i do is go to work and play games or go to therapy. its like i need to find people to hang out with and do shit that doesent involve getting high. idk dude, maybe one day everything will feel okay. thats what i hope for

>tldr, life sucks, hope it gets better

OP here.

You're in the initial stages of addiction recovery. It gets better. I
m an addict too, it's hard, I understand your plight. Addiction is not easy. Funny enough, I also had a heart attack a few yesra ago when I was 21. I believe in you, user. So does everyone else here.

honestly its the hope that someday ill get married and have a son one day. this drives me to learn, work, and be all-around successful so that child can be as happy as possible. things feel rocky with my gf which has made me very sad lately because it threatens my only real goal in life.

anyone identify with this?

Her.

dont invest too much into her dude it wont end well

yeah dude, heart attacks arent the best things in the world. my chest problem went away a month or two ago randomly. i was on blood thinners for a long ass time. times like tonight where i miss my friends, sneaking vodka in water bottles to school and eating percs and smoking a blunt right before i went into class. i know i need to find friends, but i dont want people that i see in meetings to be my friends for some reason, i want normal friends who maybe occasionally drink or smoke. thanks for believing tho bro.

She will be gone from your life eventually, and it will be much worse than before.

>pro tip: change her for you.
It's not egoist, it's realist.

OP here.

I know venting is a big part of recovery, and it might not be my place to suggest things, but I might recommend joining community clubs. Most towns/cities have adult sports leagues/book clubs/etc. Even if it's not something you're terrible interested in, it can't help to try, if anything to keep your mind off using again.