ITT times when we were alpha as fuck, I'll start
>be stroking neighbor's cat
>fucking bitch animal scratches me
>kick the little fucker
>run inside
>see neighbor later
>she tells me they had to have the cat euthanized
>thinks a car hit it
>lol fatality
>flawless victory
>alpha
>as
>fuck
OP is a 12 year old faggot
fuck you
good job you dumb fuck now go hit yourself so you dont have to waste oxygen anymore
These quads are gonna derail this thread
This pasta is so old it belongs in a museum
didnt even notice i had quads
damn and now i got dubs
big man kicking cat. fucking autistic kid
>playing WoW
>really need to pee
>run to bathroom
>start peeing
>cropspray errywhere
>run back to computer
>mom goes in bathroom
>shouts at me for peeing on floor, tells me to wipe it up
>I say no I'm busy
>bitch
>she mops up my pee
>I'm a level 72 druid
>I got epic items
>alpha as fuck
nigglet
I don't need to be "alpha" because I'm a man. Men don't need to brag.
"Real gangsta ass niggas don't flex nuts,
'cause real gangsta ass niggas know they got 'em."
-Geto Boys
>be me
>15yo sister in her room dancing to Miley Cyrus songs
>go in there, tell her to shut the fuck up
>she turns volume up and keeps on dancing
>I punch her really hard in the tit
>she starts crying immediately
>I unplug her speakers
>eject CD and throw it across room
>tell her I hope she gets tit cancer
>back to my room
>play My Chemical Romance really loud
>alpha as fuck
>one tine i ordered big macs from mcd
>get to drive thru window
>"thank u have a nice nite"
>didn't even say t-thank you
>jacked off to loli wehn i got home
>being fucked in the ass by a black dude while also sucking off an asian dude
>black guy nuts in my ass
>spit out asian mans dick turn around
>fart black man seed all over the asian mans face
>alpha as fuck
>Be 27, dating 16 yo cutie, her sister is 11, cute face tomboy
>A little more than a year later, she gets pregnant and we move in together
>4 months into pregnancy, we go to family reunion, her dad has 12 brothers and sisters, she has a shit load of cousins, get blowjob from her 14 yo cousin
> 2 months after that, cousin has menstruation for a month straight, turns out she has a problem and they have to remove her uterus
>Visit her family again, see cousin in hospital. Her now 13 yo sister is there, hair grown out, looking good AF
>Stay up late drinking with her dad, gf goes to bed early
>After everyone else is out for the night, sister comes downstairs in T-shirt and panties, no bra
>We talk for a long while, she flirts a lot
>Nothing happens though, just bonding.
>Sister comes to visit for a month over the summer
>Starts off as holding hands when gf (now fiancee) isn't around, then making out, one time with her wearing my college hoodie, shit was so cash
>We did everything but fuck before she left
>Best and most exciting part is when I get any opportunity to leave the house, like when she needs things (preparing to have the baby), paint for the nursery, diapers, etc. I meet up with her sister and we fuck like animals in my car.
>Gf wants me to get a minivan, I'm alright with this since I'll be choosing something that folds down into a bed in the back seat.
>be 14 horny as fuck guy
>meet guy in his 30s off craigslist at motel
>he fucks me in the ass and cums inside me
>alpha
>as
>fuck
>be high school
>some ska rock poop wizard runs his mouth to my gf. calls her a cunt or something. icr
>confront him in front of all his friends.
>dude squirms and lies, smirking the whole time
>crowd grows. give ska boy an ultimatum
>"you can kiss her boots and beg for her forgiveness or i can just demolish you."
>ska boy hesitates
>hits knees
>kisses boots
>begs her for forgiveness
>runs off crying
>runs like his anus has been tampered with
>mfw gf got horny from alpha display
>my weiner when boffed her in car in parking lot 5 min later
>mfw she got pregnant
>be 9 months
>go to hospital
>PUSH! PUSH!
>BREATHE!!!!!!!
>spaghetti sprays from gf
>mfw my best friend is half-spaghetti, but i'm not
>mfw this is no longer an alpha story.
"Alpha as fuck" not Pedo as fuck, or Gay as fuck, Losers.
kek'd
You lost your alpha status when you played My Chemical Romance.
Nice reading comprehension, I was the underage one not the pedo.
you people are funny
shitty copy pasta
nice reading comprehension, i considered yours gay.
This anti alpha meme is pretty much how I always envisioned alphas and any alpha discussion on Sup Forums
>play CS
>not a very good player
>but this day i am somehow good
>some clan joins the open server
>they are crap
>kill many of them and trashtalk continiosly
>there is a girl, talk to on chat too
>in one round kill all four clan members
>girl like me
OC here
>be me 20 at the time
>was out with a girl that had bf
>we were walking infront of the sea
>we sit
>we talk a bit, I start to kiss hers neck
>she says something like friends usually don't do that
>I ask her does she enjoy it
>she says yes
>so I continue and start kissing eventually
>after some time I ask her if I shaved nicely
>she says, well nothing special
>I put her hand in my pants and say: no, I meant here
>slowly work her hand to give me handjob
part 2
>she broke with her bf in the meantime
>comes to my place to watch some movie, nothing sexual
>I start to kiss her again
>slowly take off mines and hers cloth
>with time I start to lick her
>she didn't even shaved because she didn't intended to have sex with me
>I take my handcuffs from drawer
>handcuff her to bed
>play with her a bit
>then fuck her
>she enjoyed it much, but regretted it later
so Sup Forumsros this one of my few alpha moments lol
oh and she was 1 year younger than me
Finally someone with some Alpha content.
>be me last year
>go to Bangkok alone
>traveling SEA for the first time
>first night
>meet lots of people in hostel
>go out to a bar
> get drunk
>have threesome with two Italian girls (they're friends from home)
>everyone thinks im alpha as fuck
I got one
>couple years ago
>be sick
>have to call in sick to work
>boss is picky about giving at least 3 hours notice
>call in 2 hours and 59 minutes before my shift
But little did they know the girls were your mano sinistra y mano destra
>Be me in 10th Grade
>Normies acting narcissistic like always
>Try to pick on me during lunch
>Roast them for being waste of life
>2 of them are on the verge of crying
>Big Dick.png
>Their girls try getting on me
>Call them out for being sluts like when one of them offered a 30 year old guy a blow job for $5
>All them want to fight me outside
>Flip them off and announce to entire lunch room how they're about to cry and can't comeback so they have to fight
>They walk away as I flip them off
>Feeling Alpha.wav
>Continue to harass them theoughout the rest of the year
>Destroyed their egos for the entire rest of high school as they spiral into a pit of shame and defeat
>go look for new clothes
>half of the ones i try dont fit because my shoulders are too fucking wide compared to my waist
Just because you're a virgin doesn't mean everyone else is.
nice one user
>hear that my sound is fucking some bitch extremely loud in his room
>get mad
>open his rooms door and see him inserting his wee little cock in the ugly whore's asshole
>I start smiling and say ,,No son that's not how you fuck an ass properly"
>pull down my pants
>get closer to my son's bed
>I fucking grab him with all my might and start hatefucking his little hairy ass
>I fuck him so hard that he starts to have one of those epileptic seizures he had as a kid
>Lol what a weak ass faggot
>I finish in his butt, pull up my pants and start laughing loudly as I leave them alone and close the door
Why does my son never visit, Sup Forums?
>10 years ago
>middle school, 12 years old
>Constantly bullied by classmates
>have phys ed.
>told to change into sweats
>go into change room after everyone already changed into their shorts or sweats
>get out and go to class
>still about 5 minutes before it starts
>big fat german guy who would always bully me shows up
>standing behind me and I don't notice him
>he pulls my pants down
>underwear go down too
>dick is clearly showing
>everyone stares at me
>all my classmates see my dick dangling there
>bully gets nervous
>nobody knows how yo react
>pull my pants up and walk away
>next day girls started talking to me and the big german guy stopped hassling me
Never been more glad to have a big dick.
DAAAAAAAAAAMN
post pic i wanna see. no homo tho
Seconding
...
confirmed
^
Desu
Otosama gomenasai
>be me
>last Saturday
>stopping at work on my day off because I like monies
>stand out side after working
>talk to big boss
>hes telling me life advice on how not to end up like him
>he makes 6 figures but is miserable
>trying to tell me how to be successful and not miserable
>smoking and listening intently
>some fucking grenade walks up
>"uh.. hey.. me and my friend were wondering if we could get your number"
>"No I'm obviously busy"
>grenade laughs nervously and walks off
Post pic
>be 16 at the time
>mother was abusive as fuck
>pulled my sister out of the shower and started beating her
>after she was done she came after me
>dug her claws into my side
> I used my obscene amount of tard strength to punch her straight in the mouth
>FALCONNNNPUNCH.jpg
>got arrested and kicked out of the house
>got out without a slap on the wrist cause judge thought it was self defense
Alpha.
As.
Fuck.
>be me
>voted for Trump
>Le me, walking on the street
>Trip on stupid fucking rock
>Mouth lands straight on dick
>Couldn't resist to not suck
>Literally couldn't stop ducking dick
dam bro u alpha
the thread is "times you were alpha as fuck" not "make up a bullshit story"
damn user u so crazy
>be me 10th grade
>some bitch talking shit to awkward autistic kid
>alpha mode activated
>walk up to her and roast her bitch ass in front of her friends
>dumb bitch crying and tries to hide it and acting cool
>finnish her and walk away like a boss
>be me
>no hair because cancer
>best friend has tons of hair
>call him one night because I was made fun of for being hairless
> he decides to shave the top of his hair off to give it to me
>Decide to glue hair onto self
> Mfw my uncle doesn't make fun of me anymore for being hairless down there during sex
Go home 9fag
Neck yourself you piece of garbage
trips on injustice
>be me late 2014
>flatting with douchebag old dude
>he tells me one day I hadn't paid my rent that week when I had
>decide to move out the next day
>he tries to stop me leaving in my car
>tell him to fuck off and drive away pulling finger at him
THREADLY REMINDER
BEING A SEXUAL PREDATOR ≠ ALPHA
>Be me
>22
>downtown calgary
>pretty Damn drunk
>on a bit of speed
>walking by c train stop
>see a girl looking scared while some drunk shit is talking to her and other guy is filming on phone
>watch what's going down
>guys saying some nasty shit
>speed turns on a tap in me head goop
>booze sets the couch on fire
>run up behind the guy and smash him in the head with half empty whiskey bottle
>kick him in the back of the knee
>eats the fucking pavement
>girl is mortified
>camera dude is shocked
>FUCK.JPEG
>grab guys phone, start running
>delete video
>drop phone
>keep running
>vomit on shoes
>regret life choices
>be 17 year old high school shithead
>hanging out at friends house
>brother brings beer
>brother and friends start drinking
>at first, i don't drink
>i start drinking though lol
>they start smoking weed and i take a hit
>we through a beach ball back and forth to eachother
Once took a shit and realized I didn't have any toilet paper. Me being the alpha I am, I wiped my associates with my hand.
>be me
>surrounded by hilary lovers
>go to poll to vote
>sing "me votin trump you niggas cant stop me"
>nigga tries to stop me
>gets arrested by cops at the polls
>keep on singin like a boss
>vote trump
>trump wins
>fuckyeah.jpg
>fuckyounigger.png
>i like turtles
Lol this thread is hilarious. Ill post some oc
>band mate always accuses me and his girl of fucking
>mfw hes being insecure
>2years later his girl hits me up on Valentines day
>they are fighting as usual, hes tweaking so she left the house
>me and her smoke and drink
>she ended up sucking my cock, licking my feet, riding me
>no condom, was about to cum and warned her
>she didnt move and she purposely rode me harder
>fuckit came
>might as well keep fucking now
>she came three times and i came twice
>sucks my cock clean
>drop her off home so she can kiss him
>dont meet for like a year
>shes drunk same Scenario diff day
>this time intake her anal virginity
>she kept moaning "what are you doing"?
>told her, hold on s litte longer im
About to cum
>cum deep in her ass, pop ass cherry
>no shit on my cock
>took so long car battery died.
>sucks my cock until triple a shows up
>mfw everytime i see them kiss
OP is a fucking Beta.
>Implies killing things smaller than you makes you an Alpha
>MFW
Did you get arrested for this or for the crime of lying on the internet?
>drunk
>on speed
>still co-ordinated
>not lying in a gutter getting raped by the local homeless guy
Noice
>gf of several years leaves me
>depressed for a week
>she texts me that she wants to fuck me
>she comes over
>we fuck for what felt like an hour
>smoke a joint, talk a bit
>fuck again
>tell her to leave at some point
>go partying later that night because feeling better
>hook up with a girl in a club for the first time
>take her home
>fuck her
>tell her to leave because i felt like doing so
>mfw
>be me at work
>group of qt pi's basically talking about how much they wanna deepthroat shillary
>say to me "you're voting for hillary right user?"
>look right at them
>"uhh, no, fuck hillary"
>none of them even know how to respond
>go back to working
>alpha
>as
>fuck
I kek'd my pants
That isn't a flawless victory as it scratched you you dumbfuck. L2mortalkombat. Fucking autist.
You lost your alpha status when you didn't just go in there and tell her that the old dude across the street really likes Miley Cyrus too and that playing it really loud would just make him come over and rape her and that you'd just let him in because you really need some new speakers because your old ones are shitting out and you knew you could steal hers while she was getting raped because she wouldn't notice and then you could give them back to her and tell her the old dude took them but you got them back and then you'll be on good terms with her again and she'd never know you conspired to let the old dude rape her
Or you could've just bought a $2 pair of headphones and gave those to her and told her it was this years xmas present
I shared my experience, you think I give a fuck if you believe me. Not everyone lives an uneventful life.
>pic related
>found on Tinder
>bj + mated
>meat grinder
Bump
>has never been drunk or done speed