ITT:ways to fuckup a car

ITT:ways to fuckup a car
Ill start
1. Spray 20 or so cans of shaving cream through a cracked window.
2. Spraypaint turn signals red and headlights black then white.
3. Place peices of bologna and velveeta cheese on the outside of the car.(will eat away the paint in the shape of the. Processed delli slice of your choice)

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Bump

brake fluid on paintwork, eats paint and soaks into metal, can't respray over

Hide a thermonuclear warhead in the trunk and rig to explode when the driver starts the engine

sand in the gas tank nigger

when some asshole blocked my courtyard drive exit i used to spray the windows with motorcycle chain lube spray, its teflon and some gooey stuff--a bitch to clean off

Kerosene or motor oil in the gas tank. Smoke screen on!

>Diesel in a gas (Petrol for you Eurofags) engine
>Gas in a diesel engine
>Don't change the oil
>Drive it off a cliff
>???
>Profit

Lend it to someone who doesn't really get cars.

They'll treat it like shit and leave it full of garbage.

>Lets call it gas!
>But Cletus! Its a liquid!
>We didn't throw out them European tea leaves so you can make sense! We will call it how we like it and tell everyone else that they are wrong!

>Let's call it petrol!
>But charles! It's a corn product!
>We didn't throw out dental care to eat corn! We will call it how we like to call it and tell everyone else that they are wrong!

Daaaamn

Gas being just short for gasoline which is actually the name of the chemical of which it is primarily comprised.

>let's call it petrol because there's 100 other petroleum distillates

You fucking snaggle tooth cretins, this is the kind of shit why we kicked your arses out of these colonies.

Take a spark plug and thin copper wire, put spark plug sitting right inside the gas tank, connect wire to spark plug housing at front of car and at spark plug in gas tank. When he starts the car Boom.

Two things to do to fuck up a car in 30 seconds.
1. Using a small sledge hammer, smash the A, B, and C pillars all around the car. You don't need to go crazy, we're just looking for some crumpled metal all around. This will most likely render the car a total loss, as the roof support pillars are considered vital to the structural integrity of the car.
2. Slide a jack under the car at the point where the engine meets the transmission. Proceed to jack up the car as far as it will go. This can cause major damage to both the transmission and engine, and will one again most likely total the car.

>You can't eat Petrol
>My country didn't throw out dental care.
>We aren't telling everyone else that they are wrong. Just you Americans who are wrong.

When you have no proper arguements to make. Insults become the last option.

Put Military-Grade explosives on it and detonate it.

Not sure why the only thing americunts have to bring up against europeans is that weird teeth-argument which doesn't even make the slightest sense. Most europeans have normal and healthy teeth, what most americans mean is cosmetical dental care which is a huge thing in the states and not so much in europe.

>strawman
>it only looks that way
>"if you don't agree with us, you're wrong"

You're defending someone who used "Cletus" and poor grammar as an insult.

oh man u guys

>Variant spellings of "gasoline" have been used to refer to raw petroleum since the 16th century.[3] "Petrol" was first used as the name of a refined petroleum product around 1870 by British wholesaler Carless, Capel & Leonard, who marketed it as a solvent.

Straight from the wiki.

youtube.com/watch?v=FRQfjO9jvVU

>Gas being just short for gasoline which is actually the name of the chemical of which it is primarily comprised.

you guys should fix your school system

If it wasn't for the French
You were fucked
Then again you don't do history
As you don't have one
Statistically euro fags have by far better dental care than your nigga infested shitholes

>If he is going to strawman then so am I.
>You have no idea where I'm from apart from "not North America"
>If you dont agree with the prevailing opinion on a opinion based subject, then you are wrong."

I was defending myself who doesn't know any other names that come from the USA and yeah you are right about the poor grammar thing sorry about that.

Wire airbag to brake lights, add a bigger fuse to brake light switch.

>Pot meet kettle? Goose meet gander?
>conversation about britbongs "my country"
>words are a construct

We have the same names as you people.

I don't think you know what you're talking about.

That joke is FAR to meta for you to be using it as a reference.

Top gear is a show that is watched and loved across the english speaking world (so much so that when it ended the USA tried to recreate it). But because the show was truely an international show they made jokes about themselves all the time. Because british people love making fun of eachother and everyone else loves making fun of british people. But eventually that gets boring. So you have to change up the subject and in true british style instead of making fun of other people. They just got more Meta with thier jokes. Jokes with hidden meanings and shit.

The Meta behind this joke is that Americans think british teeth are bad. So they make a joke about hamond once having bad teeth and getting them fixed because he is vain.

Americans laugh because Hamond is embarrased.
Everyone else laughs because Americans think Hamond is embarrased.

>ITT:ways to fuckup a car

>let a woman drive it

Pour brake oil on the car, it takes a crane to get it out

/thread

You sure typed a lot.

I grew up on monty python and have seen nearly all of top gear. I understand british humor.

Maybe if you fags spent less time reading books and more time hunting y'all would've won the war

Drano in tank

Brick through windshield, then pour petrol onto upholstery and dashboard, throw a burning wad into the car.

It's fucked.

>When all things equal.
>Conversation about North America vs the world
>Words are a integral part of language. When trying to convay an idea through language the words used need to be as similar as possible in order to convay the idea.

Really? You have people called Tauriri in America?

...

I understood that

Said the Vietnamese to the American.

This one is pretty good. Where do I pick one up, walmart?

Put a cow inside of it then put it up some stairs, it takes a crane to get it out.

>When everyone's super, no one will be
>Conversation about "Eurofags" "European tea leaves" and American vernacular.
>implying everyone should speak the same language

We're a veritable melting pot of people.

Captcha = pictures of storefronts, one is called "CASA CHINA"

Airbags are fucking expensive m8.

...

Put water everywhere they're shouldn't be, put gear oil where there should be.

Put bananas in exhaust pipe

>m8

Autism.

This is one of the most pretentious things I've ever read. Kill yourself you effeminate eurofag

...

>I think this line of debate has ended because you are now proving my point.
>Conversation about an american believing that only Europe called it petrol and a non European calling him out for it. American vernacular was a cheap insult that was already apologised for.
>Non European saying that everyone that does speak the same language. Should speak the same language.

Maybe you are a melting pot of people. But that doesn't change the fact that Cletus is the only name I know comes from America. Hell, I might even be wrong about that. Its you that believes I used it as an insult.

A Dutch woman perhaps?

...

Here's some American names
>Moon-unit

>I thought we were agreeing this whole time
>Conversation about americans' and europeans' vernacular, and interjected with "my country" so it's safe to assume you're european.
>American english and british english are the same language?

Let me google that for you + cletus. "The name Cletus is a Greek baby name. In Greek the meaning of the name Cletus is: Calling forth; summoned." Don't be obtuse.

>moon

Also Norman is an American original? Nice.

Its potatos, you can get them stuck and no one will know until it ruins the car. In the movies it explodes but I highly doubt that, someone did it with an orange and the car just died.

Myth busted.

>Fuck ok then.
>Assume makes an "ass" out of "u" and "me".
>English and english are the same language.

Just like this guys favourite "Moon-Unit". Just because the meaning is greek. Doesn't mean the name is. But I suppose thats another prevailing opinion thing isn't it? Unlike the origina subject however we dont know what the prevailing opinion is.

>o-ok
>o-ok
>o-ok

It's a greek name and a greek word from ancient greece... Anyway, it's all a construct so who cares.

Obviously you've never seen a black banana

Put gravel in the hubcaps. They will drive around hearing this knocking noise and take it in to have it fixed but there will be nothing wrong with the engine. It's amazing how much moneythey'll waste before they realize what happened

Alternatively you can put fish in the hubcaps, no noise but their car will smell like ass

This is a first for me. To actually reach a conclusion to an arguement with someone on Sup Forums.

Did we just win? Can we leave?

Take a sledge hammer and smash the shit out of it

Pour paint into a slightly opened window

Pour a few liters of milk all over the interior.
Drain the radiator coolant or engine oil.
Snap sticks or pieces of metal off inside any keyholes.
Cut partly through the timing belt, high RPM will eventually snap the belt and send the pistons slamming into the valves and cams
>This is kinda unpredictable, so don't do this if you don't want to put the driver in serious danger.
Loosen all nuts on one wheel.
Wrap a freight strap around an axle and a suspension spring.

Drag a nice sharp flat blade round every panel in the car and maybe leave a little message

I think so...

Later, losers, enjoy getting trolled for all eternity, we're gonna go outside or some shit.

Fuck the pooftas, top shit m8, cheers from Australia.

What kind of degenerate 12 year old are you. Stop being a nig

>You fucking snaggle tooth cretins
I lost my shit while taking a shit, thanks

Underrated as fuck
I give this post a perfect 5/7

Woah. This is 2spoopy. Out of the entire list, these exact thoughts about these exact names was what I thought.

Put a "I'm With Her" sticker on the bumper.

>Pretentious, yet not inacurate.
Also
>Not from Europe.

>2016
>Having hubcaps
Unless you drive a real povertybox most cars have alloy wheels.

Is its a mostly full tank, not much will happen.

Especially gas in a diesel car.

Great minds think alike?

Ofcourse that just means idiots never differ.

Expanding insulation foam in the exhaust pipe. Takes forever to find.