Help my autistic ass get laid tonight Sup Forums

Help my autistic ass get laid tonight Sup Forums

How should I respond to her message?

>m'lady
maybe pick a different person and dont use m'lady

ask if you can lick her fuckin armpits bitches love that shit

too late, you already fucked it up

Stop

>m'lady
Is this a meme? There's no way people actually use that shit.

How the fuck did that line work...?

Pity. Either that or this bitch is ugly as shit and desperate.

Alright, ask if she's into video games because if she really find that stupid shit funny then, well, she's stupid as fuck and probably plays video games.

Either way this dumb ass wants it

>m'lady
You already fucked up mate

What does she look like? Post face pic

Rate my responce lads.

...

This has got to be a fucking joke

No one can be this retarded

To get her now, send her a selfie while you're wearing your fedora. Also talk about how athiest you are, and how much more intelligent you are than basic humans.

Next it gets tricky. You need to let her see that you have extremely greasy hair. This signals to her that you are extremely manly, and you aren't afraid to go days without showering. Thankfully, you probably already have this done.

Lastly, tell her about how you're such a b/tard. That's how I got my lady, the moment I mentioned Sup Forums she was wet and craving my cock like a sand nigger craving American land. Best of luck to ya, Sup Forumstard.

OP please BTFO everyone in this thread by showing them the results of your game. I think you fellers would be quite surprised.

OP, what are you even doing

He's winning you ginormous faggot, you niggers need to be encouraging this

Holy shit she actually responded back.

You're doing great OP,keep on like that and i'm sure you will get some pussy

This girl has to be the ugliest girl ever

Pity bump.

She probably thinks you're actually retarded. Seriously.

Op please I gotta know how she looks

bait

She's pretty cute famm

Shhhhh

Ok, fuck this.

shes wearing camo she obviously autistic

Matched with this ugly bitch on tinder, what should I say?

Op, post a pic of yourself

show me a pic of your soles and feet, go for it man

Sorry I have Parkinson never meant to swipe like

IDK, I'm honestly assuming you match in the looks department cause you here (forever). Be nice could be an easy fuck assuming you have the space to do so.

Your eyebrows look like shit smears

topkek

I'm getting laid tonight lads.

Let's see the reply

no your not.

should've dropped the gimmick while you were ahead

I already have a girlfriend, I don't need to fuck with that ugly shit

this

I am cringing so hard right now. Just stop OP stop.

idk you could be fulla shit. plus if your on tinder, is your girlfriend really all that good? really doubting you on the anonymous image board where can claim whatever you want.

"if i saw you drunk and passed out on the streets i would carry your disoriented body back to my place and let you sleep in my bed while I take the couch,I'd deal with your freakout in the morning
I'd say "you don't need to tell me what happened but you do need to eat this" as i hand her a bowl of eggs"
I'd offer you a ride home and tell you to take care.

It's probably fake anyway. I, for one, am ok with OP making himself look like a dumbass if it is real.

deus vult

If she's racist/islamophobic and stupid as hell you might have a shot there my autistic friend

ITT: Sup Forums tries to get laid. They fail because of the Crusade.

I scaled down my autism a bit.

>I scaled down my autism a bit

Not even close

no

rip

>i was just kidding
look at this smooth motherfucker

OP never stop. Give me more cringe material.

Its not too late end your self111

eh

meetme is full of airheads

it'll be an easy fuck

If she doesn't know what Saracens are she's never played AoE2 and you really don't need people like that in your life OP

respond nigger

Veni, Vidi, Vici

Go get that pussy, OP

Is this your first time speaking to a girl other than your mom?

get her number asap then set up a meeting asap if you want to get anywhere

If you knew what you were doing, you'd know complimenting a woman is worse than the gibberish you posted before. Girls like to chase.

Show her your piss bottles OP, that always gets them soaking wet

anyone here like sex? how do i sex with woman do i need phone? its ok i fart??

She's offline, I guess I'll have to wait until tomorrow to fuck her.

Sleep is code for: never talking to you again unless Im bored and need a ball of yarn to play with.

>where do you work at if you don't mind my asking?

>
>>>/off/

No wonder its working, snookie will fuck anyone

>like a sand nigger craving American land

I'm surprised you got as far as you did.

NO SHE IS NOT

God is on my side.

>if you don't mind me asking
That was completely unnecessary and only made you sound like a beta.

...

>will you take my hand in marriage? I promise i'll protect you from those dirty saracens