Hey guys, it's that time again, ask me to say/sing anything, and I'll do it to the best of my ability~

Hey guys, it's that time again, ask me to say/sing anything, and I'll do it to the best of my ability~

vocaroo.com/i/s1D3O1cfpzel

Other urls found in this thread:

vocaroo.com/i/s1JWtwkfRO6a
vocaroo.com/i/s0X9hl4xSaPX
docs.google.com/document/d/1r0OOMgs5xgNhoL9dodXS3iuXFKG1txVoYPMKcY0GGk0/edit
youtu.be/MmInyB-7FhA
youtu.be/lhGwrtffFK4
vocaroo.com/i/s12oCCSA1uWZ
vocaroo.com/i/s1JwyuFkSQ78
vocaroo.com/i/s0cqJetVpvrp
vocaroo.com/i/s0YDtvLFPT7J
vocaroo.com/i/s1rW1AB0t6Qo
youtu.be/YTWbRCFV7K0
youtube.com/watch?v=pA8DdkM2Wqo
vocaroo.com/i/s1H63nMIcPOD
vocaroo.com/i/s0D6Klxf6XXc
vocaroo.com/i/s1qoRY6YwUSo
vocaroo.com/i/s0UuCJLvUzFg
vocaroo.com/i/s0k7LmhjDXaC
vocaroo.com/i/s1ZWgOvEi1Q2
vocaroo.com/i/s15ThBAk1UKj
vocaroo.com/i/s1Ez0tin43Qg
vocaroo.com/i/s1U7fyF0w9pP
vocaroo.com/i/s1UGl5zX6X2I
sites.google.com/site/loliconstoriesrje/
youtu.be/PfYnvDL0Qcw
vocaroo.com/i/s0B5405Z95wX
vocaroo.com/i/s04OhWKr4ihI
vocaroo.com/i/s178x5f4yxfQ
vocaroo.com/i/s0qZyA4wwv7L
vocaroo.com/i/s0qMNWOf1GCB
vocaroo.com/i/s1vePFnNN0p2
vocaroo.com/i/s1kXAiW7xZFW
vocaroo.com/i/s15F8e3GZGUv
vocaroo.com/i/s09A3HJ6Rp31
vocaroo.com/i/s0WRbDhGEj8m
vocaroo.com/i/s1p9fNCPtWl7
vocaroo.com/i/s0kHSxjxnUdZ
vocaroo.com/i/s1gCd6Ohz4fK
vocaroo.com/i/s09uHPHEFVdW
vocaroo.com/i/s1jG6HSmcpHq
vocaroo.com/i/s1utsodrsw5D
vocaroo.com/i/s108wpB57GwR
vocaroo.com/i/s1HL6LvgnaoJ
vocaroo.com/i/s0OTWmg2ApSS
vocaroo.com/i/s1Ccd1g9lqom
vocaroo.com/i/s00pGZoCoowE
vocaroo.com/i/s0PpFeEmkC6k
vocaroo.com/i/s1QkNC1ieu7M
steamcommunity.com/id/AwwShwitz/
vocaroo.com/i/s0eXTKQCucXc
vocaroo.com/i/s1XXO2x3ceCk
vocaroo.com/i/s0mvDKOCh59f
vocaroo.com/i/s0nD3RleF40j
vocaroo.com/i/s0VnkDf12qxT
twitter.com/AnonBabble

Seiko forever and always.
Beleive in the Seiko that belives in you
Have faith, there is a whole world out there witing for you.
Hang in there, it's just the motion of the storm that rocks the boat. There is hope in tomorrow have a little faith in yourself, there is a light within you that shall never be extinguished.
Never give up, you are destined for great things. Though others may leave you, I will be by your side.
No one is alone, remember, it's what you give and not what you receive that makes a man.
Lead a good life, there is nothing beyond your reach. Stand upon the preicepice and proclaim your worth to the heavens..... Call my name..... and I shall be there.
There is a better tomorrow, in times of trouble I will be with you. Never let go. Never lose faith, there is always another day. How do you expect others to put their faith in you..... if you have none in yourself.
Have you forgotten that you are not alone....
Hold on. There is so much more to you than you realise. I belive in you. There will be a place in my heart..... for you.... always..... Hang in there..... keep believing in yourself.
I know how hard life can be.... and their seems to be only one way out, never believe that!
Never lose the way on your journey, and realise that.... all you've loved is all you own.....
Keep it in your heart and never forget. Keep on. Always your guiding light, Goodnight.
-J1N5

...

vocaroo.com/i/s1JWtwkfRO6a

vocaroo.com/i/s0X9hl4xSaPX

docs.google.com/document/d/1r0OOMgs5xgNhoL9dodXS3iuXFKG1txVoYPMKcY0GGk0/edit
Read the content of where it takes you, please.

Say "I'm an alabama nigger and i wanna be free, hell with the M double A C P. I dont drink and I don't cuss. I wanna ride on the front of the bus"

Plz sing

youtu.be/MmInyB-7FhA

Thank

Some device files under /dev don't correspond to hardware devices. One that exists on every unix system is /dev/null; writing to it has no effect, and reading from it never returns any data. It's often convenient in shell scripts, when you want to ignore the output from a command (>/dev/null) or run a command with no input (

bumping

I want to be railed hard and with out mercy while you force your baby girl to call you daddy.

youtu.be/lhGwrtffFK4
please mimic, it's for your good pal futa.

Bump for this

vocaroo.com/i/s12oCCSA1uWZ

vocaroo.com/i/s1JwyuFkSQ78

Sorry, I'm not familiar enough with that to do it.

vocaroo.com/i/s0cqJetVpvrp

You are not a passable trap

A decision support system (DSS) is a computer-based information system that supports business or organizational decision-making activities. DSSs serve the management, operations, and planning levels of an organization (usually mid and higher management) and help people make decisions about problems that may be rapidly changing and not easily specified in advance—i.e. Unstructured and Semi-Structured decision problems. Decision support systems can be either fully computerized, human-powered or a combination of both.

vocaroo.com/i/s0YDtvLFPT7J

vocaroo.com/i/s1rW1AB0t6Qo

thanks fam

I have a dissonance server if anyone wants to come on in btw to chill or whatever, pic related (bonus points for Eurocucks, we don't have enough of those apparently)

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

Let's pay some respects to 2010 memes

How about this song instead?

youtu.be/YTWbRCFV7K0

Wow man that is a EPIC and FUNNY ironic meme you got there, made me LOL

The Motherfuckers grew out of a Dada-influenced art group called Black Mask with some additional people involved with the anti-Vietnam War Angry Arts week, held in January 1967.[1] Formed in 1966 by painter Ben Morea and the poet Dan Georgakas, Black Mask produced a broadside of the same name and declared that revolutionary art should be "an integral part of life, as in primitive society, and not an appendage to wealth."[2] In May 1968, Black Mask changed its name and went underground. Their new name, Up Against the Wall Motherfuckers, came from a poem by Amiri Baraka. Abbie Hoffman characterized them as "the middle-class nightmare... an anti-media media phenomenon simply because their name could not be printed."[3]

Early Motherfuckers included Tom Neumann, the stepson of Herbert Marcuse, John Sundstrom, Alan Hoffman and Alan Phillips.

Hello darkness, my old friend,
I've come to talk with you again,
Because a vision softly creeping,
Left its seeds while I was sleeping,
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Still remains
Within the sound of silence

In restless dreams I walked alone
Narrow streets of cobblestone,
'Neath the halo of a street lamp,
I turned my collar to the cold and damp
When my eyes were stabbed by the flash of a neon light
That split the night
And touched the sound of silence

And in the naked light I saw
Ten thousand people, maybe more
People talking without speaking,
People hearing without listening,
People writing songs that voices never share
And no one dared
Disturb the sound of silence

"Fools" said I,
"You do not know, silence like a cancer grows
Hear my words that I might teach you,
Take my arms that I might reach you"
But my words like silent raindrops fell,
And echoed
In the wells of silence

And the people bowed and prayed
To the neon god they made
And the sign flashed out its warning,
In the words that it was forming
And the signs said,
"The words of the prophets are written on the subway walls
And tenement halls
And whisper'd in the sounds of silence

youtube.com/watch?v=pA8DdkM2Wqo

Ethnic violence in South Sudan began as part of the Sudanese nomadic conflicts, continuing since January 2011.

The fighting continued throughout the transition process for South Sudan's independent government.

More than a month following South Sudan's independence and secession from Sudan, the fighting escalated after several cattle raids took place during ongoing clashes between the Murle and Lou Nuer, at farms in South Sudan's Jonglei state, killing up to 600 people[10] and injuring up to 985, on 18 August 2011.[11] The clashes took place when members of the Murle group are said to have attacked the majority Lou Nuer, stealing nearly 40,000 cattle.[12] The death toll was originally reported to be as low as 58,[13] but the United Nations said the flow of information had been hampered by vast distances and poor logistics.[14] The UN also said that there was a possibility that as many as 200 people had been abducted.[14] By January 2012, clashes including and stemming from the August cattle raid had left more than 1,100 dead in the region, according to the UN.[15]

The Eurasian rock pipit (Anthus petrosus), or just rock pipit, is a small species of passerine bird that breeds in western Europe on rocky coasts. It has streaked greyish-brown upperparts and buff underparts, and is similar in appearance to other European pipits. There are three subspecies, of which only the Fennoscandian form is migratory, wintering in shoreline habitats further south in Europe. The Eurasian rock pipit is territorial at least in the breeding season, and year-round where it is resident. Males will sometimes enter an adjacent territory to assist the resident in repelling an intruder, behaviour only otherwise known from the African fiddler crab.

Eurasian rock pipits construct a cup nest under coastal vegetation or in cliff crevices and lay four to six speckled pale grey eggs which hatch in about two weeks with a further 16 days to fledging. Although insects are occasionally caught in flight, the pipits feed mainly on small invertebrates picked off the rocks or from shallow water.

Value theory encompasses a range of approaches to understanding how, why, and to what degree persons value things; whether the object or subject of valuing is a person, idea, object, or anything else. This investigation began in ancient philosophy, where it is called axiology or ethics. Early philosophical investigations sought to understand good and evil and the concept of "the good". Today, much of value theory aspires to the scientifically empirical, recording what people do value and attempting to understand why they value it in the context of psychology, sociology, and economics.[1]

At the general level, there is a difference between moral and natural goods. Moral goods are those that have to do with the conduct of persons, usually leading to praise or blame. Natural goods, on the other hand, have to do with objects, not persons. For example, the statement "Mary is a good person" represents a very different sense of the word 'good' than the statement "That was some good food".

Ethics is mainly focused on moral goods rather than natural goods, while economics has a concern in what is economically good for the society but not an individual person and is also interested in natural goods. However, both moral and natural goods are equally relevant to goodness and value theory, which is more general in scope.

"I'm sorry things turned out the way they did, but it's probably for the best if we just forget about eachother"

Which one are you though.

Whispering: "Daddy, you have to be quiet or mom will wake up... You gonna cum? It's OK, shoot your cum into your baby girl."

vocaroo.com/i/s1H63nMIcPOD

vocaroo.com/i/s0D6Klxf6XXc

vocaroo.com/i/s1qoRY6YwUSo

vocaroo.com/i/s0UuCJLvUzFg

vocaroo.com/i/s0k7LmhjDXaC

vocaroo.com/i/s1ZWgOvEi1Q2

In sociology, value theory is concerned with personal values which are popularly held by a community, and how those values might change under particular conditions. Different groups of people may hold or prioritize different kinds of values influencing social behavior.

Major Western theorists who stress the importance of values as an analytical independent variable include Max Weber, Émile Durkheim, Talcott Parsons and Jürgen Habermas. Classical examples of sociological traditions which deny or downplay the question of values are institutionalism, historical materialism (including Marxism), behaviorism, pragmatic-oriented theories, postmodern philosophy and various objectivist-oriented theories.

Methods of study range from questionnaire surveys to participant observation.

Good morning mister! Don't worry, mom left and she said I could have you *all* to myself till she gets back... What, you thought she'd leave you tied up all alone without anyone to wring out your cock?

vocaroo.com/i/s15ThBAk1UKj

Zombie, come in and say hi, I'm popping in and out between this thread.

vocaroo.com/i/s1Ez0tin43Qg

vocaroo.com/i/s1U7fyF0w9pP

wb pervert~

Can... Can you just make lewd loli noises?

vocaroo.com/i/s1UGl5zX6X2I

Say : Two to the one from the one to the three
I like good pussy and I like good trees
Smoke so much weed you wouldn't believe
And I get more ass than a toilet seat
Three to the one from the one to the three
I met a bad bitch last night in the D
Let me tell you how I made her leave with me
Conversation and Hennessy
I've been to the motherfucking mountain top
Heard motherfuckers talk, seen 'em drop
If I ain't got a weapon I'ma pick up a rock
And when I bust yo ass I'm gonna continue to rock
Get your ass off the wall with your two left feet
It's real easy just follow the beat
Don't let that fine girl pass you by
Look real close cause strobe lights lie

>wb pervert~
ty based zombie

As we arrived at my friends house, around 9.05pm now, all six of us went into his room and popped int he film Dream Catcher, not very romantic i know, but still a good film none-the-less. So, we all pull out a few doubves and all relax on his floor, her resting on my arm, while watching the film. About one quater through the film, i felt some movement bellow my waist. Her hand had slipped into my jeens and she was softly massaging my penis, first this startled me, and i roughly moved and kind of caught the skin on her arm, i said sorry and she replied with an evil smile. She thrusted her hand back down there, this time me being willing, and she squeezed my nob hard with no sign in stop, i realised the only way for her to stop was to bone.

Sing this please

Thanks!

sites.google.com/site/loliconstoriesrje/
pick a story and read it to us please

Dear Loser,[Chris]~~~~!!!!!
I thought you liked me you said it yourself I hate you .People only say you asked me out because you needed a date for the dance and that after the dance you would dump me well guess what bastert i dumped you cause you were thinking that i cheated on you i didnt so like idiots that you guys are and so smart that you are you called me a slut.I hung up on you cause you tol me it on the phone because i guess you werent man enough to tell me it in my face!I hate you and also guess what my mother hates you to that she the one who put me to do this ,you come to breakfast every morning and I aint stupid you try to sit next to me and my lil bro who only 7YRS old hates you to and dont even know what you did and is always blocking your chair.haha!I went out with another boy after you and after we were over you an idiot dared you even tried to ask me out again i didnt break up with him for you OK! I hate you ive always hated you spreading to everyone that i cheated on you when you just got jealouse that i used to talk to your friends to your so jealouse you automatically think i like them well guess maybe i do maybe i dont gotta problem you aint my boyfriend anymore I dont have to tell you who i like or who iam with and why got it i dont like you anymore the other day you told me that I have to tell you who I like or who Iam thinking of going out with its none of your buisness got that to you loser!I hate you and I know you still like me but i dont like you i dont care what your stupid friends say you make me touch your hands for stupid reasons u accidentally say you hugged me i will never like you again I HATE YOU I HATE YOU MORE THAN ANYTHING IN THIS DAMN WORLDDDDDDDDDD id rather date a spider or rat den u ur soooo ugly and fat !!!!!!!!!!And then saying that i loooooooved you pleasssse!!!!!!!!!!!Your such n ass wipe n bastert!! I HATE YOOOOOOOOOOU

Well bi you piece of shit i have more things to do right now then remember YOU

Can you plz sing Katy Perry's "firework"?

Aww, it looks scared. Come out, mister penis, it's okay~ There we go! Good boy... good boy...

Sing We Are Number One

youtu.be/PfYnvDL0Qcw

vocaroo.com/i/s0B5405Z95wX

I love your car senpai. Please fuck me raw dog in the back of your Subaru WRX, after we can vape together and talk about vape nation stuff.

vocaroo.com/i/s04OhWKr4ihI

:3c

vocaroo.com/i/s178x5f4yxfQ

vocaroo.com/i/s0qZyA4wwv7L

I can't wait for that

Do this plox I was only 9 years old
>I loved Shrek so much, I had all the merchandise and movies
>I pray to Shrek every night before bed, thanking him for the life I've been given
>"Shrek is love" I say; "Shrek is life"
>My dad hears me and calls me a faggot
>I know he was just jealous of my devotion for Shrek
>I called him a cunt
>He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep
>I'm crying now, and my face hurts
>I lay in bed and it's really cold
>Suddenly, a warmth is moving towards me
>It's Shrek
>I am so happy
He whispers into my ear "This is my swamp."
>He grabs me with his powerful ogre hands and puts me down onto my hands and knees
>I'm ready
>I spread my ass-cheeks for Shrek
>He penetrates my butt-hole
>It hurts so much but I do it for Shrek
>I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water
>I push against his force
>I want to please Shrek
>He roars in a mighty roar as he fills my butt with his love
>My dad walks in
>Shrek looks him straight in the eyes and says "It's all ogre now."
>Shrek leaves through my window
>Shrek is love. Shrek is life.

This was nice but there wasn't enough struggling for my tastes. Could you do another with more struggling?

Bumping this

hi every1 im new!!!!!!! holds up spork my name is katy but u can call me t3h PeNgU1N oF d00m!!!!!!!! lol…as u can see im very random!!!! thats why i came here, 2 meet random ppl like me _… im 13 years old (im mature 4 my age tho!!) i like 2 watch invader zim w/ my girlfreind (im bi if u dont like it deal w/it) its our favorite tv show!!! bcuz its SOOOO random!!!! shes random 2 of course but i want 2 meet more random ppl =) like they say the more the merrier!!!! lol…neways i hope 2 make alot of freinds here so give me lots of commentses!!!!
DOOOOOMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

bump

"I LOVE SUSHI!" exclaimed the woman in the thick-rimmed glasses.
"Ah, excellent," Kobayashi thought contentedly to himself, "they are enjoying themselves."
"I love Japan, period" said the middle-aged man in the blue shirt, slight southern drawl lending a down-home earthiness to his earnest proclamation.
"Oh my, it is such a joy to have such enthusiastic customers!" Kobayashi said to himself, beaming with pride at the delight he had brought to his customers. It was an idyllic day in Kobayashi's small sushi shop. But then things took a turn for the worst. "J-ROCK!" screeched a greasy-haired delinquent, quite obviously high on something.
"Oh my, someone should be watching over that poor child," Kobayashi thought to himself. But, before he could finish that thought, a rotund man burst forth from the masses, the make-up on his face still smeared across his fleshy visage.
"GIRUGAMESH!" the horrifying painted man exclaims, stabbing the air vehemtly with two massive, pudgy digits.

"What has begun here is something terrible," Kobayashi thinks to himself, rooted in place by equal parts fear, and morbid fascination.
"I LOVE ANIME!" shrieks a curiously toupee'd customer, the disparity of voice and adornment calling into question the beast's gender. "AND MANGA" yells the man-lady's back-quatto, the horrifying extra upper torso protruding from the hermaphrodite's back, malign intent dancing across his/her eyes. Kobayashi is speechless at the spectacle unfolding before him.
"AND GAYMEN!" an infernal scarecrow man drunkenly spews forth, every diabolical syllable dripping from his tongue an affront to sanity and dignity.
"Uh...DDR?," says a man quite plainly.
"Finally, a respite from this madness," Kobayashi thought as he heaved a breathless sigh of relief. But what he had seen so far could never prepare him for what came next.
"SMILE D.K." squealed the man's bloated pig-wife, barely managing to stay balanced atop her chair.

As these things happened, a realization dawned on poor, poor Kobayashi. "These people, these DEMONS, have taken all I know and love and made it wrong, corrupted it. I can not, no, I will not sit idly by as these creatures from beyond the veil wreak havoc in my shop!"

"HEYYYYYY!" Kobayashi growls, brandishing his knife like a modern day warrior. "SAKURA-CON NI IKIMAAAAAAAAAASU" he bellows, the traditional war-cry of his family. As Kobayashi leapt over the table, the gathered masses began morphing, face tearing asunder to reveal rows upon rows of sharp teeth, as new musculature rippled forth from beneath their clothes. Many dropped to all fours, revealing their true bestial nature, snarling and snapping their jaws at Kobayashi. Like a true warrior, however, he dove fearlessly into the throes of battle, slicing sinew and bone alike with a precision afforded him by his years of chef training. He laughed maniacally as bucket upon bucket of blood was spilled, the organs and flesh of his former patrons spewing forth like water down a hill. He and his restaurant alike were soon strewn with every type of viscera, and he gave an animalistic howl to the still-rising moon.

Kobayashi goose-stepped over the knee-high pile of cadavers, and, having finally exited the restaurant, he wiped the blood clean from his cleaver and strode off into the horizon. He knew that he had honored his ancestors with this true act of bravery, and helped to rid the world of a grave evil indeed.

Such a great shitposting thread

vocaroo.com/i/s0qMNWOf1GCB

vocaroo.com/i/s1vePFnNN0p2

vocaroo.com/i/s1kXAiW7xZFW

vocaroo.com/i/s15F8e3GZGUv

brb, gotta change my panties, BECAUSE THEY'RE SO DRENCHED IN MY PUSSY JUICES

vocaroo.com/i/s09A3HJ6Rp31

vocaroo.com/i/s0WRbDhGEj8m

vocaroo.com/i/s1p9fNCPtWl7

vocaroo.com/i/s0kHSxjxnUdZ

Say

"Hey user, just leaving a quick voicemail. Just wanted to say that I finger-fucked your little sister last night. She was moaning all over! I licked her sweet little pussy until she was super wet! You know, you say she's annoying, but she wasn't very annoying when I pulled out my strap on hahah. She was a good fuck, user. I loved how young and inexperienced she was, I sure did teach her! Tell your little sister I said hi! Bye!"

vocaroo.com/i/s1gCd6Ohz4fK

im not a qt grill but here Im talking about the penis.

...

topkek

Don't need the loli voice, just want the humiliation:

"What the fuck, are you hard? God, what is wrong with you that you get off to fucking *feet*? All I said was that they smell bad, and you're fucking rock hard... I'm texting everyone right now..."

Also damn, what a post

Thank you very much for singing, it's very nice!

"I love you. You are worth something. You are not going to die alone."

vocaroo.com/i/s09uHPHEFVdW

vocaroo.com/i/s1jG6HSmcpHq

I like how your voice rumbles~

pls join sewvur, I need disnated WAM

Please say

"Thats a good girl, now get on your knees and suck like a good little slut" (in loli voice

Near obligatory:

What the desu did you just fucking desu about me, you little desu? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my desu in the Navy Desus, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret desus on Al-Desu, and I have over 300 confirmed desus. I am trained in desu warfare and I’m the top desu in the entire US armed desu. You are nothing to me but just another desu. I will desu you the fuck out with desu the likes of which has never been seen before on this desu, mark my fucking desu. You think you can get away with saying that desu to me over the desu? Think again, desu. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of desu across the USA and your desu is being traced right now so you better prepare for the spam, maggot. The spam that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your desu. You’re fucking desu, kid. I can be desu, desu, and I can desu you in over desu ways, and that’s just with my bare desu. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed desu, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Desu and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable desu off the face of the desu, you little desu. If only you could have known what unholy desu your little “desu” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking desu. But you desu, you desu, and now you’re desu, you goddamn desu. I will shit desu all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking desu, kiddo.

Can you talk a bit about everyday life as an english bloke?

Thanks.

>Voice changer

>Be 14
>Bring shrek 1 & 2 to class
>Tell teacher we must watch shrek
>Teacher makes class vote for which movie to watch
>shrek 2 has majority vote
>feelsgoodman.jpeg
>Then, Francis pulls out Despicable Me and hands it to teacher
>Everyone in class votes for it and laughs at me
>Teacher throws my shreks back at me and puts Despicable Me in DVD player.
>As the disc loads, I hear loud footsteps from outside. The rumbling shakes the desks and chairs.
>The smell of onions filled the room.
>Suddenly, naked Shrek bursts through the wall and looks at DVD menu of Despicable Me in anger.
> "Ogre m'aye dead bodeh"
>Shrek throws two onionades at the tv and kills the teacher and a deaf girl.
>"Dohble Keel"
>Shrek punches through a kid's chest, pulls out his heart and replaces it with an onionade
>kid explodes.
>"Treeple Kehl"
>Shrek grabs Francis as he tries to escape and bends him over.
>He pulls out Francis' intestines through his butthole and ties an onion to it.
>Shrek then tosses the onion out the window and Francis is dragged out with it.
>Francis falls 8 stories to his death.
>"OGREKEEEEL!"
>Shrek turns around to rest of the class.
>He quietly whispers, "Thees is the pahrt whehre you run away."
>Entire class jumps out of windows to their death.
>"SHREKSTERMINATION"
>Shrek turns to me.
>He looks me in the eye and smiles.
>"Bet yeh weren't shrekspecting thAt."
>"I-Is it....ogre?" I ask.
>"It's ogre when Aye say it's ogre"
>I fall to my knees at his majesty.
>I was ready to please Shrek.
>He pulled out his massive ogresized eshrekt cock and lodged it in my throat.
>My eyes filled with tears.
>mfw they were happy tears.
>Shrek let out a loud ogre roar as he filled my esophagus with sour cum and onion sauce.
>He pulled his cock out of my mouth but as I wiped away my tears, I noticed he was already gone.
>Shrek is love, shrek is life.

One last one pl0x,

"Hey user, it's me again. Just wanting you to come by my house and pick up your little sisters panties. She left them here, I've been rubbing them all over my pussy all morning. I even took pictures of her too, she's so cute when I was eating her out. In fact, I'm going to pick her up again today, and there's nothing you can do about it. I'm going to make her a personal fuck-toy slut when I'm done with her. Can you smell it user? *Sniffs* God she has some pretty pink panties. Catch you later!"

Make more gentle keyboard noises and stifled giggles plz. Also maybe a few mouse clicks

I support this.
~pedo

My Grandfather smoked his whole life. I was about 10 years old when my mother said to him, 'If you ever want to see your grandchildren graduate, you have to stop immediately.'. Tears welled up in his eyes when he realized what exactly was at stake. He gave it up immediately. Three years later he died of lung cancer. It was really sad and destroyed me. My mother said to me- 'Don't ever smoke. Please don't put your family through what your Grandfather put us through." I agreed. At 28, I have never touched a cigarette. I must say, I feel a very slight sense of regret for never having done it, because this thread gave me cancer anyway.

:^]

vocaroo.com/i/s1utsodrsw5D

Thanks for kinkshaming yourself for me~

Thank you~

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vocaroo.com/i/s1Ccd1g9lqom

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>be me
>be 15
>still loving shrek
>beg dad to go see shrek 3
>Dad says I'm too old
>only takes little brother
>dad sends me to my room
>pray to shrek
>Hear rumbling from downstairs
>Smell of onions rising
>Look out window
>see naked shrek in a fit of rage outside
>See dad and brother try to escape in car
>"Ogre my dead body"
>shrek grabs bumper and shoves his eshrekt cock in exhaust pipe
>Car explodes as shrek shoves onionade in exhaust pipe
>Dad in half
>blood everywhere
>dad tries to crawl away
>shrek grabs upper half of dad
>fucks dad through open abdomen
>Pulls out cock
>dads heart is entangled on green cock
>"Should've checked yourself before you shrek'd yourself"
>Squeezes blood from heart on cock and uses it as lube
>butt rapes little brother
>Shreks cock comes out through brothers mouth
>Shrek throws brothers corpse out into street
>car swerves
>6 car pile up
>Shrek spots me through window
>Walk into front yard with tears in my eyes
>tears of joy
>Shrek rips off my cock in one motion
>fucks bloody hole where cock was
>Flips me over and butt fucks me
>Shrek splodes inside of me
>Fetches onion cum and spits it into my bloody cock pussy
>"It's ogre now"
>before I can look up Shrek is gone
>Shrek is love Shrek is life

Daddy, I have an idea. When mom goes out, we should tie Emma to the Sybian... I KNOW she's only 4! She won't even remember. I'll be so hot, come on... you know you want to see her come 'til she passes out.

If you can say

"As we see, this young pepe is growing in form. It's meme magic is still studied by top scientists today. It moves and flows through the feeding grounds of websites and chans, what is this meme magic many ask? No one, will ever know.

Got a steam, a faggot?

Tell me you love me..?

Haven't heard it too many times since my wife passed away

When all alone in my chair, I just go about wishin'
I wanna be strong, I really wanna be trusted
When all alone in my bed, I just go about yearnin'
I wanna be cool, I also wanna be like him

But that's not somethin' I can do so easily
This is not simply my way, my style
Gotta get a hold of my life

I wanna fly high
So I can reach the highest of all the heavens
Somebody will be
Waiting for me so I have gotta fly higher
Gotta keep goin'
Everything is a brand new challenge for me
I will believe in myself
This is the only start for me

>Extra points if you can sing it like the actual song

we love you user, sorry for your loss

You are the ocean's gray waves, destined to seek
Life beyond the shore just out of reach
Yet the waters ever change, flowing like time
The path is yours to climb
In the white light, a hand reaches through
A double-edged blade cuts your heart in two
Waking dreams fade away,
Embrace the brand-new day
Sing with me a song of birthrights and love
The light scatters to the sky above
Dawn breaks through the gloom, white as a bone
Lost in thoughts all alone

Add me on steam.
steamcommunity.com/id/AwwShwitz/

vocaroo.com/i/s0eXTKQCucXc

>Thanks for kinkshaming yourself for me~

tfw your kink is shame and kinkshaming only creates a feedback loop blowing all the power relays on decks 4-7 and it's gonna take at least three hours to fix but you've only "got fifteen minutes" does this bitch even know anything about engineering

:(

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Um, I'm sorry, I'm unfamiliar with that

I did this one last thread you degenerate

vocaroo.com/i/s0VnkDf12qxT

Bumping
~pedo

My name is Mabel
It rhymes with table
It also rhymes with... glabel
It also rhymes with... schmabel!

>I swear to god, you remind me of this one user on Sup Forums that sounded kinda like Mabel...

kek, thanks for the laugh tonight user. I'd suck your dick if you wanted.

nigglet! don't sign my handle!

>I did this one last thread you degenerate
I WOULD NEVER... but yeah you read something similar...

"Dinner is my favorite. Both Emma and me have to sit on these things called Sybians..." etc etc

The degenerate part tho, yeah

>Does that date your lust, user?

Like nothing else in this world

FUCK MY MOTHER
FUCK MY SISTER
FUCK MY LIFE
FUCK MY WIFE

I AM A CUUUUUUUCK,
I AM A LIIIIIIB--TAAARD

Yo, can you say:

"Uhh...Hello! Uh, my name is Mimi Tudor. I'm from England, and I practice Fortune Telling and Scorcery! I dabble with knitting and singing during my free time...and well...yeah."

"Anyways, I'm part of the Keio Flying Squadron as the Deer! Reyno trusts me alot, maybe it's because he thinks I'm mature! But then again, I'm only 13..."