>Middle school sleepover
>Watching uncensored Comedy Central standup and professional dodgeball on cable
>Girls Gone Wild commercial comes on
>Friends yell "HAND CHECK, HAND CHECK"
>Everyone raises their hands up, laughing
>Do it and pretend to laugh along but don't get it
Did anyone else know this feel?
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I was watching TV with my oldest cousin one time and suddenly she stood up and unzipped her pants and lowered it so that i could see her underwear but then she quickly closed it again and i was like WTF why didn't you put it all the way down
Also i used to massage her feet often when we would sit next to each other
Cable?
Fucking rich amerikan pig
>you will never hear those steel drums play again on late night TV
It was my rich friend, not me.
that HAND CHECK mess has to be the gayest shit i've ever read
you could have been having a good circlejerk or circle suck off if you were really straight guys
>see GGW commercials late a night
>get really horny
>sneak into dad's study to look at porn
>start jacking off
>dad walks in
>GET OUT I'M CHANGING
>remember it's his study and not my bedroom
>.....................
>show you're watching ends
>the following is a paid advertisement
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>you will never know what happened the night before
scrambled porn channel would get sound on weekend nights when it was late.
>watch GGW ad most nights
>As Told By Ginger comes on right after it ends at 5 am
>watching GGW ad at middle school sleepover
>make them turn on As Told By Ginger
>they ask how I know it's on
>have to reveal this is a regular thing for me
>watch As Told By Ginger with bros
What a nice memory.
>As Told By Ginger
damn so that's where i developed a ginger fetish!
these jews have been brainwashing my penis for years now
>that part when the titties drop super jiggly & the ggw logo covers them but you can still see the jiggly
so many loads have been dropped to that bitch she had the best tits i've ever seen, even till this day.
Well, did you finish? C'mon, champ.
HBO or Cinemax would sometimes give a free trial weekend. i would look at TV Guide channel to see anything sex related. i Taped a softcore porn movie that was terrible but shows boobs. use that tape quite a bit. whenever other trials or soft core movies would come out i would add them to teh tape. also had taped the Girls Gone Wild comercials on there. I had made my own shittty compilation porn and bonerjams '03
A GGW commercial gave me my first real boner and it kept me up almost the entire night because it wouldn't go away and was starting to hurt and my heart was beating irregularly fast.
>watching Seinfeld on TBS
>this comes on
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I fapped so many fucking times to this commercial
i jacked off under the blanket when me and my friends were watching some soft-porn on cinamax back in grade school.
>i think they knew
i wonder how many of those girls were underage
>wake up at 3 am in the morning to feel good down below while watching these
>they never get naked
>Pre 2010 PC era
Probably all of them senpai
I miss the 00s. They sucked but were better than now.
>internet hadn't taken over IRL yet
>Sup Forums was more fun/innocent/usable
>the internet was in general
>normies still got outside
>still actually watched TV
>emo boys did androgyny better than trannies/genderfluid types did now
Also the Dubya-era Republicans were horrible, but they were better for culture because of course old white guys in power justified the "counterculture", kinda. It's why I think things are so off in the 2010s when it's the opposite.
I also miss my youthful optimism.
Anyone else remember those "sounds of the 60's" infomercials?
>at an 8th grade party with cool popular kids
>someone suggests we all watch this cool new horror movie on pay per view called saw
>we asks his parents if we can order it and they say yes and order us pizza
>pizza gets there
>we all pile into the living room and turn off the lights
>watch the movie
>after it finishes we're all super paranoid scary pigface is going to kidnap us and make us cut off our feet
>after fucking around we go to sleep
>some asshole starts laughing like the puppet does
>i start chimping out
>started wacking my pillow around in the dark
>hit one guy in the leg who was trying to go turn on the lights
>awkwardly apologize
>"geez user i was only kidding you retard"
>mfw that was the last sleepover party i got invited to
I watched this as a little boy in Mexico and this was my perception of all Americans
this
You didn't jerk off your friends, too?
how rude
SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE
Cute snug
Why, though? There's no reason to give a shit
>13 or 14
>jerking off to one of those latenight sexy hotline infomercials that have the babes posing in bikinis
>mom walks in
>does a 180
>walks out
>That fucking omelette
degenerates
>be poor
>only good TV channel around 2005-2008 was UPN around 10
>even then only showed My Wife and Kids and Bernie Mac for 2 hours
>tfw had to sit through nigger sitcoms and then South Park came on for an hour
>we now return to Real Sex
>professional dodgeball
>sick at home
>tfw this would come on while you're watching A Pup Named Scooby Doo on Cartoon Network
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>roughly junior high
>friend is over, staying up late
>bored and browsing through the guide
>see "Shop Erotica", change to that channel right away
>it's just an infomercial for a blender
>we start making jokes about how funny it would be to tell somebody this was called "shop erotica" and then just play the sound to them
>the blender buzzing, everyone commenting on the taste/texture of the samples they passed out
>have hearty chuckles
Did anyone watch Howard Stern SHow on E! with blurred out nude pornstars and strippers and beetlejuice?
did anyone ever actually buy this?
>summertime
>staying up late to watch the GGW infomercial
>80-90% of a 30 minute infomercial is the same 2 minute ad repeated with that faggot Francis or some shitty truncated teasing in between
>watched the whole thing every night anyway
>always kept the volume low with one finger on the channel return button at all times.
I was like Pecos Bill on the draw with that remote. Parents just be silently creeping up out the dark after midnight. I also always remembered to switch between two kid-friendly channels at the end so that no one accidentally returned to the channel and wonder what the fuck I could be watching on it.
anyone watch Bliss on Oxygen?
semi nude softcore porn
I bought buzz cuts
>watching skinamax
>have to be cautious because dad was worse than golden freddy
>constantly checking stairs and mirrors to see if hes near while edging
>pretend to be asleep if he is around
>he catches me, I get an ass whopping because its a school night
totally worth it
>tfw girls gone wild wouldn't even make me hard today
>It's a dildo factory episode
>It's a fully clothed tantric session episode
Comfy CD collection infomercial
that was the best also that bikini show on E! and MTV Spring Break was the best.
>hot college girls playing sexually suggestive games
>bikinis, thongs and g strings every where
God, that takes me back. I never have seen any of the real videos, are they online anywhere?
a little bit
Yep. UPN was all we got. Watching weird black people shows like "Second Time Around", "Cuts" and "Girlfriends" just waiting for the Simpsons, followed by CSI, followed by Cheers.
Also sitting through American's Next Top Model waiting for Veronica Mars.
Fuck you
>ywn fight with your siblings for control over the fusion chamber
this came on while watching tv with my family when I was in grade school, had to hide my boner
youtube.com
Who remembers this
>2007
>start going to parties where I'm the youngest
>shit beer, shit garage band, slutty girls
>go into one of the rooms to relax for a bit
>sit on recliner
>lean back
>accidentally knock a stack of dvds down
>it's a collection of GGW
>take a few
Good times
Good loads
Thank you user
Goddamn this thread. I'm not even that old, the pre-internet era wasn't even that long ago, but it feels like a completely different world and I can hardly even believe I used to live in it.
>Did someone say muffins?
Always laughed at Hazel with that fucking cigarette
i forgot about this
aw yeah
fuck. that thing actually made me feel creative. i played that and lego island all the time. my nigga
>2003~
>watching late night TV in los angeles
>1130 simpsons episode just ended, nothing left to watch
>DR SUSAN BLOCK on public access TV channel
>think 'what is thi--"
>its a sex talk show
>spend several weeks fapping to the show every weekend at 1 AM
>we change cable providers, never fap to the show again
Great times
We were so innocent
What a nigger thing to do Would have done the same tb.h
This and Carmen Sandiego
And Jill of The Jungle
Fucking Greg at 1:30
is the commercial on Youtube?
I remember finally managing to find a video from it online and it wasn't even that amazing even back then.
>like Pecos Bill on the draw with that remote
>always remembered to switch between two kid-friendly channels at the end so that no one accidentally returned to the channel
You had to have these skills to get boner fulfillment in those days, user
>tfw watched Euro Trip with two friends one day when we discovered he had Cinemax
>hear his parents come up the drive
>ohshit.jpg
>I do the two channel switch and cover our tracks
>both friends look at me and silently wonder how I know to do this and thank me for knowing it
It's insane. I'm 23 and I'm just now realizing what a fucking profound time we lived in. As long as we don't fuck up globally, the internet is going to be around in some form for the next few hundred years. And we got to live through its blossoming. We were there for the first wave.
Yeah, at least it got better here in my market when UPN and WB merged and took all the nigger shows to the CW, while UPN was left to fill the void with a local channel called TXA21.
Still had to wait through 2 hours of nigger sitcoms for South Park though.
iktf
>tfw your parents are gone and you were hoping for HBO to hook you up with some good wank material but it's gross old people talking about their weird kinks
God I miss those pre-porn days. Not even the roughest, most degenerate hardcore can get me going these days.
What's some essential pre-porncore?
was already getting on 4chins around 06
>tfw GGW didn't get me hard then
Not a good feel tbqhwyf
TELL ME HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LIVE WITHOUT YOU
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Tfw first jerked off to the Howard stern show on E!
obligitory
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>mfw I put these on for background noise on a regular basis
pure comfy
Had cable in Australia, back in like '03 there were shows like these on the Comedy Channel if you stayed up late enough, I think one was called The Wonderful World of Sex. And Naked News. Anyone remember them? God tier material for a 13 yo.
The Jenna Jameson E! True Hollywood story
god damn it
...
>late 2000's watching this shit , the Power Juicer, Ninja Express, and NuWave oven infomercials
>tfw saw the sequel to the original power juicer informercial
youtube.com
meant to reply to
> not coming over and suckling your peepee
Shit mum desu user
>Not even the roughest, most degenerate hardcore can get me going these days.
I wonder if this is a problem that plagues every generation of men, or if it's just who are bad off because we grew up watching porn
even i felt dirty wanking to this
I think Brooke Burke on Wild on E! gave me my bikini fetish
>yellow to black
the absolute madman!
Girls Next Door
Sex and the City, until you figured out it was fool's gold
Stripperella
Nocturnal Emissions
Temptation Island
The Dreamers on IFC
Skinemax on-demand at your grandparent's house
Cathouse
I remember staying up and watching Adult Swim, and I particularly rememberI fucking hated Inuyasha as a show- my least favorite on the network, but I swear to god I absorbed the entirety of it through osmosis by just leaving the TV on.
These outro songs still get to me.
youtube.com
Naked news was fukin poetry.
Us paranoid guys, we have the intuition to know these things. Another trick:
Have that second channel set to something possibly inappropriate for kids, but significantly less so than censored softcore ads, like Family Guy or something. That way, you have justification for having the volume super low, but don't have to have awkward talks with your parents.
Tfw she had a camel toe on one of the shots.
Brooke was so fucking hot. But now looking back shes pretty meh compared to some pornstars
>2006
>Watching a soup opera with my sister
>Hottest girl in the cast appears in underwear
>Muh dick!
>Same day
>Mom and dad aren't home
>Sneak into room with sister
>Found dad's porn magazines
>First time seeing a vagina
>Sister wonders why does the girl have hair down there
>It is a lesbian piss porn magazine
>Muh Dick!!
>Same day
>Sister and I are browsing the channels
>Wander around the 400's
>Playboy channel and what not
>"I wonder what is the code"
>"I don't know. Try "0000"."
>That was the code on default code on those satellite boxes
>Spend the day watching all the porn channels with my sister
>MUH DICK!!!
I told my friends, which all had that same pirate satellite box on their homes. They thanks me for the rest of their lives.
>2002
>Dad got pirated cable including the porn channels
>mom slept on the living room couch
>I sat on the floor and fapped with her 3ft behind me
for real tho, I actually have this and its great
in less time it takes me to type this, I can already make 7 cups of fruit smoothie for my days of weightlifting and exercising
than I can easily clean it, and re-use it to make my favorite salsa for the upcoming Olympic games!
she got some plastic surgery done to her face around 2003 or 04, and it wasn't the same after that
