ITT: Weird shit you think only you do

ITT: Weird shit you think only you do

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stick my mouse up my butt while watching porn. forget to clean it.

Collect brains

I cant get off by jacking my cock I can only get off by running the foreskin near my frenum

look up exif data on amateur pron. if it shows it was created at night or on a weekend, meh. but if it is during a weekday during the day, i beat my dick like it owes me back rent

Constantly write "OOOOOOOOO" with fish assholes

use paper after taking a leak

Eat period blood

Wat

take upskirt shots of my mother. oh and pee in the sink at work..haven't peed in the toilet in 6 years

Eat clown poop on my birthday cake

same

Anyone else shit in the shower?

Taste my shit weekly (usually Tuesday) for health reasons ... if that is weird enough.

I hold WASD like a retard.

W, S - Index
A - Middle
D - Thumb

When want to go right and jump I just switch to the normal position

Ring - Shift
Pinky - Ctrl

I know I'm retarded

Fap to Maisie

Look up "waffle stomping". You're definitely not alone with that one.

I can win the chicken game

But why?

I feel like I'm contorting my hand when I try that, what the fuck user

pllp.pl/k

Why?

moar

I don't know. Nobodssy showed me how to do it when I was a little kid + I was gaming on the arrows so it made a bit more sense. then I tried WASD and just youldn't un-learn it. I realized everybody does it differently only a few months ago. Don't ask me how that ahppened.

>when I cum I close my foreskin with my hand and release it in the toilet
>if there's a pretty sunset in the sky I will always go out for a walk
>whenever im having fun I think to myself "im gonna miss this" which makes me not able to enjoy anything because i worry too much
>I always wear a jacket when whatching football, no matter how hot it is
>I always chew gum when driving, helps me to concentrate
>when I see someone with earphones I always try to guess what they are listening to by their appereance

what the fuck

You sick fuck

I broke my hand when I was a kid, I cant do your shit right now

It's not to late to turn from your wicked ways user, I know you still have good in your heart

I shit completely naked.

Can't shit on the streets because of this. Also, counting how many shit logs I make per shitting.

You're not alone m80

sometimes when i have to take a shit, if i'm in the middle of doing something else i won't go to the bathroom right away. instead i hold it in, sometimes stand up and clench my buttcheeks together to make sure. i usually hold it in as long as possible until it's just too uncomfortable or i'm done whatever it is i'm doing.

been doing it since i was a kid when i used to watch TV and didn't want to miss anything. used to shit my pants sometimes too if i couldn't manage to hold it in long enough.

>when I cum I close my foreskin with my hand and release it in the toilet
Wat. Why?
>if there's a pretty sunset in the sky I will always go out for a walk
Nothing wrong with that. In fact, that sounds like a rather pleasant quirk.
>whenever im having fun I think to myself "im gonna miss this" which makes me not able to enjoy anything because i worry too much
Same, bro. Same.
>I always wear a jacket when whatching football, no matter how hot it is
Hmm, bit odd.
>I always chew gum when driving, helps me to concentrate
Fair, I can understand this one.
>when I see someone with earphones I always try to guess what they are listening to by their appereance
Sounds fun. Might start doing that, too.

>>when I cum I close my foreskin with my hand and release it in the toilet
Same, but mostly release it in a tissue, too lazy + roommates

>>if there's a pretty sunset in the sky I will always go out for a walk
Cool, would do that too, if there were any good views of the sunset around where I live

>>whenever im having fun I think to myself "im gonna miss this" which makes me not able to enjoy anything because i worry too much
That just means you need to smoke more pot

>>I always wear a jacket when whatching football, no matter how hot it is
Derp

>>I always chew gum when driving, helps me to concentrate
Fact, also helps some with nausea

>>when I see someone with earphones I always try to guess what they are listening to by their appereance
Do you ask them sometimes, to see if you guessed right?

>when I cum I close my foreskin with my hand and release it in the toilet
I do that too, sometimes
I somtimes skip songs that would give me weird looks in case someone is somehow listening in on me
I shave with a pair of scissors because I can't be bothered to get an actual shaver

When I fuck my gf I imagine that my dick is hers and shes actually fucking me with it. It helps me cum.

Fart in my hand and smell it.

>I pick my nose and eat my snots, while masturbating
>Create random noises at random time. Love to talk to random street animals and pets like that.
>I eat my pimple juice.
>Love the smell of clipped nail from my largest toe.
>Collect belly-button puff.
>Make random moves with fingers, toes, tongue and other body parts, invisible for others, when in public.
>Make that weird noise with years.
>I always piss squatting in the channel, when taking a bath.
>Touch random surfaces with fingers and whole palm..just for the feel.
>Eat own earwax.
>Love to chew my soul-patch.
>After I piss, I clean my dicksking with paper and wait till all the piss goes out.
>Make piss races with the toilet flush.


Once I managed to eat my snot, while having sex, without her noticing.

I guess there's more, but that's all I can figure atm.

>I put the ends of cloth under my nails
>I sing and talk in baby talk to any animals i see in hopes of having it come up to me

>when I cum I close my foreskin with my hand and release it in the toilet

holy shit spot on same as me, the walk to the toilet with my hand holding shut the foreskin is always awkward

a housemate of mine is the opposite of you
Pinky - A
Ring Finger - WS
Middle - D
Index - F for melee and R for reload
he stretches his pinky to shift for sprint. It's weird as fuck.

Some of these seem like they were written by some proto-human attempting to be a normal being but lacking correct enunciation.

Same, wont get my boxers stinky

For some reason I want to chill with you, what do you drink? What are your fetishes regarding sexual things?

Apart from the WASD, I am very skilled in doing stupid shit with my hands.

>I can spin pillows
>as a skateboarder, I can do about 30 tricks with anything that has a rectangular shape, like a phone for example. Kickflips, Heels, 360 flips, hardflips, shuvs anything
>give me something with a handle and I'll throw it around. Pan? Flipped. Racket? Flipped.
>I tend to have the smelliest after-pizza farts. Nveer hear of anyone else having this.

>shave with scissors

how????

also, i go through one razer a year, havnt finished my first pack yet

me too

masturbate to shit stained panties. i desperately wanna lick their asses

I have some strong fetish connections to anything adult baby/CD/Bondage tbh haha

>>when I cum I close my foreskin with my hand and release it in the toilet
Hey Mes.

I tried my best.

Thanks. This time of the season I'm mostly into white whine. But I love beer, gin, whiskey, etc.

My fetish are fingers, nails, small tits, pussy juice and watching/forcing the girl masturbate.

i butter my bread with butter before making a sandwich, no matter what else is on the sandwich. the only exception to this is peanut butter sandwiches, mostly because it's the food i make when i'm lazy and so buttering with butter is just adding an extra step. any other kind of sandwich without butter on the bread just feels overly dry and not tasty.

for the longest time i just thought this was how everyone made their sandwiches, but apparently it's not very common.

well, I don't shave completely, just cut off the hair that sticks out
at the neck things get a little more difficult, because I try to keep them as sort as possible, but small stubs usually stay
I might care more about it, if I didn't already have a gf who's okay with that

Sure, I do this too. Difference is that from the time that I feel like I could take a shit, to the point that it's really fucking uncomfortable is atleast something like 10+ hours.

When ever i do insanely nasty farts i purposely pretend to bend down to fix my shoe to just get a whiff of that smell of my own inerd's

I always had that when I was growing up. Butter in every damn sandwich.

Nowadays I tend to just use a little mayonnaise instead.

doesn't everyone do that?
started doing that when I realised that I can't pause online WC3 games just because I needed to go and usually, when the game was over, I had forgotten all about it and start a new game

I wash my dick after taking a piss, or just piss in the bathrrom sink while water is running. If there is no sink I'll clean it with toilet paper. Not going to get piss on my clothes.

>That just means you need to smoke more pot
No matter how much I smoke, the weed from the shit dealers of my town will never giblve me a truly pleasant high

>Do you ask them sometimes, to see if you guessed right?
Never did actually

I spit on the toilet paper before wiping my asshole.

tits

where do you live? I know only abut two people who don't use butter
I always prefer an amount that people usually think of as too much, and it has to be cold, tastes the best

dude what the fuck

do you like having a sticky asshole

source? moar?

Not that user but I also do that, it's basically the NEET way of baby wipes, wet toilet paper gets all the shit of your ass, also no unless you're a smoker and never brush your teeth your spit shouldn't be sticky.

Thats so fucking weird omg

Use wet toiler paper to wipe 2-3 times, then use dry toilet paper 2-3 times .

I normally shower but now and then take a bath instead, every time I bath I lay there and piss in my own mouth and swallow one mouthfull.

Always eat the same during the week.
Monday is bunday, tuesday is breadday etc.
And I wear a bikingglove on my right hand when gaming

>I wear a bikingglove on my right hand when gaming
ha hahaha hahahahaha

When was the first time you pissed in your mouth and swallowed, did you fell dirty? do you regret afterwards and do you brush/mouthwash afterwards to avoid family smelling piss breath?

I wear the same jeans on the weekends & they have not been washed in at least 6 months.

Blow in glasses/cups before I pour into them to get rid of the dust.

user this is not weird, this is how go tier sandwiches are made. butter on the bread at all times, unless the sandwich involves direct mayo-bread contact in which case skip the butter.

Pro tip: Filling a cup with water, emptying it before filling it with softdrink will reduce that frizzy white foam greatly and prevent it overspilling the sides.
Also I always wash cups out with water before I use them.

I think about scenarios where I have to fight off people with some sweet kung fu.

I don't know kung fu.

Double dubs tells the truth.

Ever since I got my own apartment I always turn the webcam on and film for the entire time while I have a female visiting me, camera pointing on bed.
a) If anything goes down I get free hidden cam porn.
b) If I encounter any psycho bitch who would accuse me of rape I have that covered.

You need to be put down

years n years ago
nope, just go downstairs n grab a coffee
I don't breath on or get too close to people till after first gulp of coffee

aww yeah..... no regrets and yeah feels dirty

Lets say a girl accuses you of rape and you show the authorities the footage, wouldnt you be in trouble for filming a sexual act without her consent?

When I am at my gfs house, I knock before entering a room, even when I am certain that no one is in it.

>suck bfs cock
>he cums in my mouth
>run to sink and spit it out
I still consider myself 100% straight.

What do you think is worst to defend against - filmimg sexual act against consent or rape?
Also - there wont have to be anything happening for someone to accuse you of rape.

Watch a lot of porn casually. I don't even fap that much, I just like porn.

Jeans don't need to be washed until they can no longer be folded

What type of porn? Feature films or gonzo?

trips of truth confirmed

But you would have more videos of other girls as hidden porn like you said. Its very likely that you would be considered a sexual predator and you would be in deep shit anyway

Bump

Thats concerning man, you might be addicted

Gonzo

This is the most ashamed ive been but sauce on the pic?

Oh absolutely. I'm a 27 year old virgin with no friends or family and that will never change. I'm fine with what I do.

I wouldn't show or give or hint in any way that there were any other videos. Also, that's besides the point, I really wouldn't consider public opinion or what my friends think while I'm facing years of constant buttfuckery in jail.
Think about it - you're in court, accused of rape, everyone symphatizes with the girl. Is it better to have a video proving that you didn't rape her at the given time or not to have it?

Good, I was worried you just watched a lot of shitty movies with horrible writing and acting.

jerk off from imagination. Internet is always watching.

>we're not anonymous it just says that.

I pick my nose with tweezers.

Pretty sure no one else does that.

wow, what the fuck.