Things you would tell your 13 year old self if you could

Things you would tell your 13 year old self if you could

>stop fucking urinating after you masturbate, our balls will thank us

What

Huh?

save all the monies, invest, compound interest! bet all the monies on trump winning the election and the cubs winning the world series in 2016

Fok u mean I almost always do.
What's your dik problem op?

What the fuck you talking about you Fucktard?

don't kill that lady and her baby in that car accident

...

ror

Ed Sheeran comes from the bladder, which is near the end of the ejaculatory chain, and as urine cannot pass backwards to the chain through the great distance between the bladder opening and the vas defrence, op is a moron

>Ed Sheeran comes from the bladder

>tfw cackroids could have been prevented

>Ed Sheeran comes from the bladder

BUY BITCOIN NOW!

KILL YOURSELF LIL ME! DO IT FOR THE BIG ME!

Lotto numbers

kek'd
wubalubadubdub!!!

>LISTEN, I NEED YOU TO LISTEN! in 2016 dishonored 2 will be a broken, unplayable piece of shit. DON'T BUY IT!

>stop fucking urinating after you masturbate, our balls will thank us
other than piss going all over the place how is that bad?

I was 13 in 1977.

Well that's a retarded thing to tell yourself. When did you get hit in the head and go dumb? 1978?

i agree. it wont hold up to the first. the story wont be nearly as fun and it definitely wont be as immersive. its gonna be a girl power simulator since the two most powerful character are women and all you do is brutally kill men.

>Dump your girlfriend
>Dump your high school girlfriend
>Go to college
>Don't get married

>getting married
why do guys cuck themselves like this?

Hey, stop doing favors for that girl you like and giving her compliments all the time. Just be as big of a dick as humanly possible and shit all over her personality. Your dick will thank me later.

i'd love to see how shitty it is but the game crashes as soon as i try to load into the tutorial or after the first cut scene

I will tell myself always pee after masturbating. Ed Sheeran will thank me later.

Do not accept the gift of World of Warcraft. It'll fuck you up and make you the worst cunt ever.

society and popculture brainwashes their brains by repeating that marriage is best thing that could happen in life

Kill yourself. You're a failure.

>hitler is going to keep showing up in a wheelchair insisting that you help him walk. DO NOT FUCKING HELP HIM WALK. DO. NOT. HELP. HITLER. WALK.

Reflux.
It doesn't effect everyone, but open your mind a little

Hey there, grampa. Did you have a good day today?

you download it off of steam?

Don't eat the yellow snow!

Have people got to the point that a game with a woman is automatically a SJW game? are you an autist?

i bought the physical copy and it brought a steam installer up and i downloaded over 30gb

>keep your eyes open for a website named Sup Forums.

So many lulz I missed

Must've been a wild 13 year old.

hey, you're as old as my mom! that's cool. do you want to be my dad? he left when i was too young to remember. i think it would be cool to have a dad who browses Sup Forums.

Go fuck yourself

Dont spend 17-26 being in relationships. Theyll fail anyway. Carry on with what you love doing, dont let college teachers and parents tell you its stupid, its not and it will make you more money than working in IT.....also, avoid Sup Forums

>in 2016 Donald Trump will be president of the US and the UK will leave the EU, when the time rolls around bet on them both happening with all of your monies

play as corvo then?

what did i do?

grow up
Stop listening to your mum all the time
Do bad things occasionally
Take more risks
Stop being a fucking dweeb

Nigger detected

>Study harder for the LSAT
>be more aggressive about rehabbing your shoulder
>eat less junk food
>try harder to make friends
>stop listening to music in earbuds a lot
>do more extracirriculars

Well, I can't urinate during masturbation, I tried.
So when do I do it?

why the earbuds doe

I have tinnitus

Someone who's actually smart here.


Invest all your money in bitcoins

Sorry it seemed like a good opportunity cause of the picture, no offense lol.

constant or ocasional?

checked

Pretty constant. It oscillates in intensity(usually worse at night) but I can tell it's there at any time unless I go outside

>Quit fucking around on Minecraft and get your dick wet you pleb
At least I'm sort of in the process of it now

how long had you been using earbuds? were you always blasting the volume? cut or uncut?

fuck man sounds bad, u go full volume on those earbuds or just constant use?

oh, i get it

What?

what am I looking at here?

As long as I can remember. I never blasted, in fact I made a conscious effort to keep it at a reasonable level(~50%) but I listen to a ton of different music, it's a hobby of mine, and prolonged use just fucked me up I guess. Shit sucks

Well it is.

Y

Not to do acid or coke and not to trust those older fags in dms they will trick u its all lies run

A dick

It certainly not the worst.

I understand that, why is it bisected with a separator in the middle?

Is it 2 dicks that were connected?

i guess just plain old genital mutilation, can be quite a rush for some.

Go and make a living, you stupid cunt
I regret most of my life

...

Damn! You were already 13 years in when I was born. Usually I'm the oldest one in here.
Not today tho.

Don't do a fuck ton of drugs, moderate. Date Hailey and join the wrestling team. In fact if you join the wrestling team you'll get better bitches than Hailey. Go to college, not tech college and take some goddam AP courses in HS

>I really get excited when I cut my dick off

what a limited fetish.

As somebody who has has excruciatingly painful urination due to that exact thing, DEFINITELY urinate after every load.

Bet everything on leicester, then bet all your winnings on the cubs. Be rich.

Bang those qt bitches in high school, they all get fat.

Also, when theres a girl on her knees in front of you asking if theres anything you want, don't say nothing you clod.

>invest in google
>fap more
>don't waste 10 years on the university, your high school diploma alone will land you your first job
>try drugs
>learn to play on the fucking guitar sooner than later
>continue doing everything else the way you like

Oh shit what did she said afterwards

Don't take that pill

Apple stocks are shit right now, buy buy buy
Be on the lookout for Google

Don't fuck with bitches, just keep up the IT stuff

In 4 years you'll be a good developer, don't stop doing it for sys admin work, it's a dead end

I'd tell him to start a YouTube gaming channel, facecam, screaming, fake space man accent, the usual

did the same at the same age but as the opposite sex, fuck

how old were you?

what was it?

I made $600 election night on predict it, bought $200 worth of Trump shares a few months before the election. Should have fucking like quadrupled down the night of. Could have made thousands

Oohh what a blissful nightmare Etizolam is.

>Ed Sheeran comes from the bladder,

Never introduce your best friend to that cute girl.

Place a high leverage BUY trade on the 1-10-2001 on the USD market. Scrap together 20k and let it roll.. cash out in 2008. Enjoy $14million

>be me
>of the female persuasion
>13yo
>start hanging out with some unscrupulous people I met at the park by my house
>they're all 16yo+
>we all go to one of their houses
>I feel super sketched out but whatever, I'm cool, right?
>get to the house
>typical party going on, like some shit you'd see in a movie
>I go sit down on the couch and kind of soak it all in
>guy I've never seen before looks about 19-20
>asks me how I'm doing, bla bla bla
>conversation progresses to where he asks me how cool I am
>of course, me being 13, I'm the fucking coolest
>hands me a pill
>he says it'll make me even cooler
>judge the pill, it's a small little white thing, thought it was like aspirin or some shit
>I take it
>
>wake up the next morning naked on a bed
>so many missed texts and calls from friends and parents
>there are pictures sent to me of me being fucked and cum and blood leaking out of me (I was a virgin)
>traumatized
>have since grown numb to it and don't care anymore
>can't remember anything of that night except what people tell me

>your dick will grow large by the end stage of puberty
>you will lose weight and will be able to suck your own dick with minimal effort
>do not use ajax dishsoap to masturbate

You were 23 when i was born

Pics?

Got more pics?

I never saved any of them, I don't even know if they're out there anymore

make some new ones

I'd fuck myself with my second cock. Totally would be awesome.