I have a cactus Sup Forums

i have a cactus Sup Forums
its spiky as fuck
what do?

pic related, its the same type of cactus i have

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Take a spike and push it through your bellend

shave the cactus?

Cactus in pooper

Trips command it

spikes are curved so that mat be interesting

Dont touch it?

Of course! In fact, I'm shaving mine as we speak!

my cactus has had a trim now. the clippers are fucked though so it didnt do much

Kek this thread man

forgot to tag

Be creative

youtu.be/Cck7Re0gcJk?t=39s

Yeah, and your cactus beard looks pretty damn thick. Might have to start with good old scissors on that bad boy!

does anyone use straight razors on their cactuses?

tried that. cactus fell over because its a small piece of shit
yeah, theyre some tough spikes. my foot has felt their fury multiple times. but i suppose thats what i get for putting a cactus on the floor and forgetting about it. on it with the scissors now

I just use scissors

my cactus seems to be too hardcore for the scissors i found. it doesnt cut the spikes
i dont think im the greatest cactus hairstylist

Become the cactus

You know what? It doesn't matter. As long as you love your cactus, that's whats important. I'm having some wine with mine now.

im doing my college assignments with my spiky friend right now. She knows whats up with college

Sup Forums need more threads like these

You're lucky to have a responsible cactus! Mine just shit post here all day... :(

too bad 90% of threads are "faces of Sup Forums", traps, YLYL and "you mad whitboi"

eat it...

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Exactly. It's rare people come together and do silly but funny shit on here nowadays.

Find your cactus a nice mate

I now want a pet cactus. What kind of care do you need to give it to own one?

i have to deal with my cactus' weird thing for hentai. it can be very annoying

Samefag

Female cacti watch porn?

Do this

As you can see in this thread, most of them like to be groomed. So, if you see one out in the wild, you can try and lure it with some scissors or a trimmer, and it should follow you home. After that, just give them internet and alcohol access and you should be fine!

oh yes. mine has a violent hentai fetish. its quite disturbing really

on the internet... no one know's you're a cactus... how many flame wars did yours start, Sup Forumsro?

My cactus is mental ill. He thinks he is a small pine with Christmas decorations. What do?

My God... that's a dirty cactus! How do you discipline yours? I literally have to threaten mine with a knife, when it gets out of line.

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bleach

Marry it

I thought I was the only one with a cactus. I'll post pics in a bit

Someone save this thread, I've seen my fair share of weird shit, but cactus roleplay is something else..

sadly i have to waterboard her. it doesn't seem to work much though

Do it every day and youll get results.

ITT these god damn green Mexican immigrants

I'm calling the CPA and the internet police are already on the way for this inhumane practice, its people like you that give us kind loving cactus owners a bad name.

shes okay. she needed a water anyway. pretty sure shes got very good at withstanding waterboarding. after all, shes still watching hentai

teabag it

trips ill do it

Damn, I have thought about doing that as well, but now I know. It's been pleasure fellow cactus user. We're gonna take a nap now. Until next time!

roll

farewell cactus user. it is an honour to find another cactus user about

thread is dead