Things about you that are true but everyone will think you're a liar and so you don't bother telling anyone

Things about you that are true but everyone will think you're a liar and so you don't bother telling anyone

>I went to North Broward Preparatory School and received head from Ariana Grande in the bathroom

Two questions:
1 did she take her shirt off?
2 can you post a yearbook pic or something?

She didn't take her shirt off but she let me grab her titties. They were small. I never purchased a yearbook

I have the ability of passive telepathy. Not something that fills a lot in my life, but it's there.

Yes, post yearbook, OP. I will give you one high five and one low five.

>I never purchased a yearbook
You lying faggot.

Let's get outta here, c'mon guys

In my 30s and over the last 5 years I've only dated girls in their mid teens and my last 3 gfs have all drank their piss and ate their poop for me.

i can suck my own penis :)

I've been under federal government surveillance for the past few years, online and offline.

Elaborate. Sometimes I can sense things in the near future and a feeling of overwhelming certainty comes over me

are you good looking?

I peed on a girl by accident when I was 13, can give greentext story if someone wants.

>At age 4, I created my own type of 'Capital Pi' notation for summation of sequences.
>By the time I was 5, I was better at arithmetic than all of my teachers.
>By 7, I had came up with a method to sum arithmetic sequences, similar to what the 'Prince of Mathematics' Carl Gauss did when he was 10.
>When I was 8, I had independently devised the concept of mechanical moments.

Why would I? I wasn't friends with many people and I just talked about some bands I liked with Ariana once towards the end of the year and things snowballed from there. Her friends didn't like me

I started a VR company and just secured our 4th big contract. I have made more money in 6 months than I have in 5 years working for one of the world's largest game publishers. Feels pretty gud

Teach us your secret.

I'm average

Gun to their head.

Ogarnij sie Blazej

I tend to think about bad stuff right before it happens.
>elaborate
I somehow pick up on people who are near me's thoughts, and experience them as my own. There's no certain feel to them or anything, and it seems to be pretty random stuff. Mostly if they suddenly think of a question or get an idea.

I have that too. Like bizzaire Dejavu. I just know that ive seen this happen before and know what is about to happen.

Has never been useful. Always shorter than 30 seconds. I gennerally become aware it is happening as it is about to end its course.

Call me a liar idgaf.

Did she swallow?

When we had a scholarship banquet I could "feel" which one would be awarded to me and because I despise going up to the stage I had this immense dread pour over me only at the specific scholarships I would win

greentext pls

kekked surprisingly hard, have fun with that mate!

No, she spit it in the toilet and I came after approximately a minute and a half. My legs were shaking

was she good?

He and I fucked messy dubai

I have murdered 6 separate transients across 4 states in the past three years.

obviously bullshit. you gotta have some kind of proof or tell some story people dont know about her man

Jessy fucking mobile

Just a blowjob?

aw you nigger, you should've lasted longer

That's pretty neat. Most useful thing that ever happened to me was impressing a girl at a bonfire cus I just knew that a casual aquaintence was about to arrive with his girl friend, and the first thing he would say getting out of the car. It happend exactly as I said less than a minute later.

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my great aunt is the supreme nun in the vatican and I am related to "The Veronicas"

...

With powers like these how could i not be having fun ;)

(S.W.I.M) murder their rapist after days of torturing them

...

There's not much to tell. In English we were paired up together for a project reenacting a scene from Julius Caesar in modern vernacular, and somehow I brought up "Spoon," which is a band she apparently likes "Go figure" and we started talking about our favorite songs and later exchanged numbers. A few days later she picked me up to begin filming the project at her house and we were putting on her makeup in the bathroom and eventually started kissing and it led to her blowing me

um...

...

Well I also got to massage her titties

Slut

What exactly are you doing?
>inb4 vr bestiallity

My grandmother dated David Duke, founder of the Knights of the Ku Klux Klan, in highschool

...

...

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Why did you stop when you were 8

The Ghost pasta is true. There was a massive gangbang and I participated. Came inside every hole of her. Icarly bitch is a coked out nympho.

...

Ive shit on another guys chest

Yes, she apparently had a lot of experience

Find girls that are needy, insecure. Nerdy girls and emo/scene girls fit this good. Go slow, interesting, don't be a creep and send dick pics. You need them to slowly fall in love with you. Girls like this will latch on to you and love you so much they'll do almost anything for you. I've gotten them to even secretly record their mom and sisters and fuck the dog.

If you want them to do some crazy sexual stuff like i did, you have to explain it right. Easiest thing to do is getting them to drink your piss..explain how it's good for you even and easier to swallow than cum. You just need to convince them. I convinced them to eat their poo by saying they're beautiful and everything coming out of them was beautiful as well. Start slow..just watching them take a dump on the floor is good.
Also you can meet these girls online in many places. There's various scene emo forums and shit and even just random chick's you find that live by you.

That's hot. It was a good tittyfuck?

Yeah okay, obviously you're just a massive faggot

Or you're mentally ill. Whichever.

I've met the Queen of England (and Philip)

Sup Forums happened

I didn't get to place my penis on her titties, I just kind of grabbed them and moved them up and down under her shirt

>nun in the vatican
you got no idea how the things work pal

this is another of our cousins

it's not as impossible as you'd think

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I've considered that a lot. But through my experiences, I've come to the conclusion that I'm not.

I lost my virginity to an escort at 18 years old and to this day it has been one of the best girls i have ever fucked.

did she deepthroat? how big are you?

Nice. I got rimmed by Madonna during her 1987 tour while trimming her bush. She said she wanted to do something off the wall and I agreed. Ripley bitch.

I am 6.5 inches and she didn't deepthroat. She was very good at it though

Sorry, loaded thumbnail

They're so far away from the family most of the time that I basically wouldn't recognise her so this doesn't bother me in the slightest.

Using photogrammetry to bring landmarks and national heritage pieces into VR. We just secured a contract with the royal museum of London to bring all of their world war 1/2 weapons into an interactive environment.

Was she drunk? Did you tried to fuck her?

I'll just not fuck up this time, gf and I fucked jessy Dubai

I ate Chloe Grace Moretz out

she use her hands? what kind of technique?

>got surgery to fix a problem with my spleen
>mfw they found i was full of shit

pics or it didn't happen

The ol' lary

She wasn't drunk and we didn't fuck because her parents were home

niggers, are you seriously this obsessed with her?

Britfag here. There is no Royal Museum of London

Coward from Broward.

This isn't like the other claims here but I was a young kid skating around a northern California town and happened upon a band rehearsing in someone's garage and later realized it was Sublime just a month before the singer OD'd.

She used the corkscrew technique and could suck like a motherfucker

>op acting like getting head from some ugly spic is an achievement

Nice quints

This is pretty believable actually. Lot less people in the world back then

Wasted quints

Did you just pass by or is there more to it?

That's so stupid that it can be true. Now I believe you, user. How old were you?

>North Broward Preparatory School
Post Diploma

secret royal britfag here
yes there is

Kek

Spent the majority of my adolescence hiding that shit, it became clear popularity is inversely proportional to academic performance, especially in mathematics. Then got into 4ch.

Ended up turning around, top masters degree and all that.

Gets

>I died in a car accident 13 years ago and none of this is real.

16

FUCK YOU NIGGER

i wish nigger

I tried to OD twice