Alright Sup Forums, this is it

Alright Sup Forums, this is it.

Give me your plot pitch for a Warhammer 40K movie.

>Warhammer

The Emperor is a young black boy from 1960's Brooklyn NY. We follow his rise to power.

6 goyllian stupidly overpowered retards fight an endless battle against 420 quadrillion trolls I mean orcs for 90 minutes while spouting such renowned catch phrases like "HERESY!" and "FOR DA EMPRAH!" to appease the autist fans

Best I could do given the source material, sorry

>It is set in future
>It is dark and grim
>It has a war
Oscars, please.

Option 1: Movie is about the Spess Merheens. Cold open with the Imperial Guard getting fucked up hard-core by the Tyranids/Orks/Chaos. Everything looks hopeless. Then a Thunderhawk swoops in low over the lines. The Guard cheer and rally. Big deal about the Marines coming, show 10 dudes take the enemy army apart virtually single-handed and then follow the squad back to the Chapter.

Option 2: Inquisitorial team goes to investigate a high lord they have suspicions about. They think he's fallen to Chaos but it turns out the Hive has been infiltrated by a Genestealer cult.

Option 3: FUCKING BATTLESHIPS IN SPACE I DON'T GOTTA EXPLAIN SHIT.

Last and least, option 4: Not one movie but three. Horus Heresy in three parts. First film is the rise of Horus. Second is him being tempted by Chaos and falling. Final one is the big showdown at Terra.

orcs are out because they were just in wow movie

war hammer has so many monsters to choose from

Warhammer 40k is the closest thing in existence to pure, undistilled daydream of a 14 year old boy. Any movie about it would be boring as fuck dramatically. Might hold up a tiny bit better as a schlocky action flick, but it would probably just end up as a CGI pukefest like Warcraft.

All quiet on the western front, but with IG instead of germans

Flip the script and basically make Shrekhammer, it's about one ork fighting his way to the top to become Warboss done in a Guy Ritchie style, the main antagonist is played by Jason Statham who is obsessed with killing him because 1) he's an Ork and 2) he's not a dead Ork, he just seems to recognize this one fucking ork out of thousands and it pisses him off.

Newly formed IG regiment comprised of 2 rival factions from Homeworld under the guidance of a Commisar travel to an abandoned planet distress call.

1st half is them travelling to planet, setting up a foothold, warp storm / disrupted communication because of bureaucracy, exploring planet, rising tensions between regimental factions (maybe some murder / fighting over resources here).

2nd half is Chaos / Nid / Ork / Anything infestation on planet and IG having to fight their way out, by the end of it, bonded through blood and honor put aside their differences and lead the regiment to glory for the emprah.

>Imbluing anyone wants to see ork/tau/eldar/tyranids
It's hardcore space marine on chaos space marine blood fest or it’s not warhammer

>A neverending battle fough in a nuclear bunker between

>2 autist nerds.

>Endless arguments about rules, how to measure distance, line of sight...

W40k at its finest.

Orks doing orky things

10/10 movie of the year all years

Anons have already came up with a good starting point,goes something like this

>story should be told from the imperial guard (aka human canon fodder for the emperor)
>they should be fighting a enemy they can't beat and getting their ass kicked like the tyranids(like the bugs from starship troopers but worse)
>The humans should be building up the space marines and talking about how bad ass they or
>last 3rd of the movie the space marines show up and wreck the bugs shit
>having introduced what the space marines are next movie can be from their point of view and fight a more complex bad guy, like soemthing from the void or some internal shit or maybe the emperors backstory about the unification wars.

something like that.

2 hours of various xenos races invading one place and getting killed by various space marine chapters in brutal ways.

bunch of space marines crash in an Ork Planet, they have to survive for a week or something
no one survives

These guys. Do the Great Crusade. Split into 10 films.

There, done and dusted.

>phone call
>Hello?
>Hey, this is Dave in America, I have 3 Deathstrike Missiles, I target your units
>What?
>Hey, they have unlimited range, I want to use them on you guys. Roll to hit.

The best bit is, this actually happened in real life, though not in actual bunkers.

You know most people just read the books and never play the game because no one can afford to play the game.

I think a movie would have to do 3 things.
1. Show the nature of the Imperium and both how it's shit but also necessary
2. Show human life in the Imperium
3. Be good enough in some way to justify it's existence.

If you make a wh40k movie and it's basically just a war movie with a different lick of paint, what's the point?
Even drop kicks would be able to tell it's lacking any vital essence and it probably wouldn't have a huge budget so can't rely on visual spectacle and monolithic marketing.

So it has to be the Deadpool of sci fi war movies, doing something unique.

I think the "theme" that makes wh40k standout is how it's in the far future, yet humanity is barbaric as shit and hasn't been able to progress at all in the face of struggle.
I think you could also make some sort of political message about the lengths governments have to go to to maintain power and control over different peoples and how this might not be justifiable.

I think this is the best option I've read on Sup Forums and /tg/ whenever this topic gets brought up.

You could show a bit of life on 2 different Imperial planets when the guys are recruited and during bootcamp.
Then you could show some of the weirdness of the planet that they fight on.

This would get across the idea of the Imperium being these huge clusterfuck where nobody knows what's going on.

...

Current 40k, maybe. Old 40k was political satire. I miss it, to a degree. The models were shit, but the stuff was pretty funny. Though shit like Inquisitor Obi-wan Sherlock Clousseau were shit.

No, they read Lexicanicum and 1d4chan.

As for not being able to afford the game. GW has existed as a thing for like 50 years. 40k turned 30 this year. WHFB lasted 35 years or something.

The game isn't any more expensive than any other hobby. But, even if it WAS, you just buy Chinese knockoffs for 10% of the price.

Going on the art of Autistic El'Jonson, he doesn't look anything like that.

Who could play a guy who looked like this?

Low budget: Inquisitor movie about the hardships of making tough decisions all for the glory of the Emperor.

Mid Budget: Imperial world is attacked by Orks and movie is shot from a Cadian trooper's perspective. The Cadian trooper's entire regiment is destroyed when he is saved by a squad of Space Marines (Insert chapter). Trooper aids the Marines using his street smarts and movie ends with a Warboss fight.

Big Budget: Movie chronicles the life of a Space Marine from when he was born to where he ended up at the epic battle he now fights on. Could be Horus Heresy, Rynn's World, or any other popular 40K battle.

make more if successful

>Rynn's World
>Popular

They aren't even in the Top 10 most popular Space Marine chapters.

You can't just jump in. At least doing the unification of Terra would allow slow introduction of characters and goals. Then do Istavann, then do Prospero, then Signus Prime then Siege of Terra. Done.

i..I Kinda hated the Emperor after this. They only love you and you killed them,how could you.

>40k
No.

Agreed. Starcraft would do it better. We got Warcraft, which GW copied, so they shouldn't get 40k film just cause they copied Starcraft.

Other way around dumbass.

>falling for bait that obvious

>Tell the story from the perspective of an Imperial Guard
>They get caught in a three-way fight with the Orcs and Eldar
>Just as the IG are about to slaughtered, drop pods land and the Space Marines arrive
>It isn't initially made clear whose side the SM are on until we see them wrecking the Orcs and Eldar (for the benefit of people who aren't familiar with the mythos)
>focuses on the benefits of following your God-Emperor and zero tolerance of degeneracy or xenos
>ends with the IG trooper dying, glad that he was given the greatest gift of all, dying in the emperor's name, while the SM and IG around him continue the never ending fight