>be me
>living semi normalfag life despite autism
>live alone, decent apartment
>kind of rural town
>get dog about 6 months ago
>10 minute drive from cool trails where I can take his leash off
>walking two days ago, dog shits up the trail
>get bag to pick up shit but I can't find it in the grass
>8/10 grill is walking toward me with her dog
>don't want her to see me wading through grass looking for dogshit
>panic
>decide to pick up rock so bag looks full
>in panic, pick up huge rock
>quickly tie bag and walk past her
>she smiles feelsgoodman.jpg
>her dog immediately starts rolling in my dogs shit
>she says "what the fuck?!" loudly at me
>hold up bag with rock and half shrug
>bag rips
>rock falls out with heavy thud on ground
>call dog and sprint to car
>drive home
>haven't left in 2 days, afraid I'll see her again
Be me
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can I ask what you scored on the CARS?
thanks for the laugh op
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I don't have the balls
Never took it, parents were hardcore christian and didn't accept that I had a problem.
Sounds like you really rocked her world bro
serous shit happening right here
fuck OFF carlos
Bumping for autism stories
Jesus, dude
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> be me
> work late on Friday
> Raining outside when I leave work
> Kind of cute but really drunk girl wanders around
> Asks if she can share my umbrella
> O... K.. fine
> She talks a lot, not very interesting
> End up outside her place
> "I like you and your umbrella"
> I try to be funny
> "My umbrella likes you too, which is unusual"
> Not funny, she laughs, is she stupid?
> "Maybe your umbrella wants to come in for a drink?"
> She's trying to steal my umbrella!
> "No thanks, I gotta run"
> Realize later after talking to a friend she probably wasn't going to steal my umbrella.
Haha what a stupid dog rolling in shit. Her fault for having a retard dog
Na nigga you can never be too careful, don't risk losing your umbrella for pussy
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Bitch was finna steal that shit, nigger.
Umbrellas are for life, pussy is fleeting
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Dogs do that all the time, faggot.
Milan says that this is now an autism story thread
> Be me
> Be 14
> Pretty good life, bitches, videogames
> Watching youtube
> Sudennly out of nowhere, the urgent need to fart appears
> Fart
> The fart makes a wierd sound
> Feel something in my underwear
> Watching YT, really interested in the video, not thinking about anything
> My hand bravely searches in the underwear
Something round, like a small little ball, the radius of the ball is something about one centimiter (Europoor)
> Still interested in the video
> Video ends
> I look at my hand
> Theres a fucking shitball in my hand
> What the fuck?
> As the autist I am, I laugh
> I want to throw the poop into the toilet
> Figure out that I'll have to walk around my father to get there
> yolo
> As I enter the living room, the shit is still in my hand, I feel that it's getting warmer
> Its fucking melting
> My father looks right into my eye
> As I see that I fastly walk to the toilet
> Enter, immediately throw the shitball into the shitter
> I force myself to pee too, so it doesn't look wierd
> My hand is covered in shit
> Wash my hands
> As I again, walk past my father, he looks at me and smiles
> Everything is cool now
> Feel like a motherfucking 007 agent
> Live a happy life afterwards
> Get a gf
Well, theres a hope for all of us autsitic faggots
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