ITT: 1000 ways to get banned from McDonald's

ITT: 1000 ways to get banned from McDonald's

Other urls found in this thread:

segarlaw.com/blog/myths-and-facts-of-the-mcdonalds-hot-coffee-case/
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

didnt know mcD could bann

idk rob it

if dubs, OP has to do all of these

Rob it

Steal from it

Wip out a gun or your dick

Sue because they served you hot coffee.

Order a breakfast burrito filled with insects

order a double whopper

rollan

Order a Mc-Gangbang. When they hand you a sandwich, take off your pants, spread your cheeks and yell loudly, "This isn't what I ordered!" and projectile shit stream all over the cashier and counter, and then yell, "Now fuck me like your little sister!"

...

>roll up to Mickey Ding Dings
>order "a big nigga ice cream"
>when the staff get mad start laughing hysterically
>do a bong rip right then
>pulll off your pants revealing your dick
>call the cook a retarded
>run outside but trip over your pants
>knock self unconscious

literally the only way to get b€ from dat place

>>call the cook a retarded

I've renamed my sides to Sputnik.

...

Why not both?

Order MCchicken.
Dont bother to go home before fucking it.
Setup laptop and webcam right there at counter and goto town.

Ex employee here, try sitting in the managers office jerking off to a picture of her and when she walks in cum on her

10/10
Definitely worth being fired

Call INS.

Cut the corners of all of the ketchup packets, so when someone goes to grab them, handful of ketchup.

>Order a sammbich
>Take the meat out
>Put your nuts where the meat ware
>flop the samdwhic on the cunter
>ask for help
>when that cash Bitch comes up, fling the top bun off and shit yourself while yelling "Trump"

Id show you dangerous end of my dick anytime baby

>cunter

Keep hangin round asking customers for tree fiddy

Offer free. Blowjobs in exchange for Wendy's food

>fill large soda cup at ketchup pump
>tell cashier your strawberry milkshake tastes funny

>ask for burger with no ketchup
>go to ketchup pump and but adequate amount of ketchup on burger
>complain your ass off about how you explicitly said no ketchup
>get new burger
>rinse and repeat

>if ketchup pump has nozzle lever instead of pump button, rubber band it down for endless flow of ketchup

>drive thru
>order food
>if they offer ketchup packets, decline
>pull over after receiving food
>go inside
>get 3 or 4 small cups of ketchup from the pump
>leave

>bring your own hot dogs
>use the ketchup pump to condomate hot dogs
>leave

>Pump as much ketchup onto your serving tray as you can before someone takes notice
>smear it all over the table, chairs, wall/window/self
>swing tray like baseball bat, flinging ketchup particles
everywhere
>don't wash hands
>don't wash face
>don't clean table
>leave like absolutely nothing happened

autistic chimping is not rebellion, son.

>literally the only way to get b€ from dat place
And also several felony charges

>Order 3 big macs
>Go into restroom
>Shove all three in the toilet
>Don't flush
>Walk out and never return

>Order a small, or inexpensive item
>Pay
>Take too many napkins
>Not every one. Just TOO many
>Enough that another person would notice
>Look for a table.
>Pick the biggest one.
>Make a show of covering every square cm of the table in napkins
>you're making your own tablecloth
>finally sit down after very carefully covering the table with an exacting overlapping arrangement of napkins
>drop food item on floor
>swear loudly
>leave restaurant
>do the same thing, at the same time, the next day
>increase the number of napkins you take by 1, each time you visit
>repeat until banned

>drive past the order-box and str8 to the collect window
>demand a wopper with cheese and a pepsi
>when they tell you they are not burger king abandon your car in the drive through and walk home

true story

you wouldn't be banned nigga, just wasted food and money and a empty stomach.

Kek'd and check'd

Check'd your check

never seen a attractive mc'ds worker. must've been a sad fap

Checked and keked and checked and checked.

oh lordie check these digits

>ITT: 1000 ways to get banned from McDonald's
Why would anons wanna get banned from the only place they're qualified to work at?

Sharpie in McPooper

be the mentally retarded guy who lives in my area. He's been banned from every fast food place I can think of

Order a McBurger with a large McFry and a McDiet Coke

kek approves this bread

Walmart has just as shitty standards

Do you know why?

>walk in to McDonald's
>ask for water cup
>fill with Hi-C
> go to cashier and make sure he notices the water cup with Hi-C in it
> When he asks about it, tell him to drink bleach
>scream "YEET!" and throw it as hard as you can into the kitchen
>threaten the cashier and use racial slurs if possible
>wait for cops

>sad fap
You're not wrong

Yeah

Tell us then.

Too soon

once had a bag of black snakes that I threw through the window at a buger king, I'd assume it work a mcdonalds just as well

a BAG of snakes.

there's a story there.

Large box of spiders

Close the lid

Walk in and set the box on the counter, open the lid, and tip it over onto the floor on the other side of the counter

act like a nigger begging for crack when buying an ice cream cone.

get your ice cream cone and walk towards the toilet. look as suspicious as possible; checking over your shoulder, peering around at your surroundings etc.

pause outside the toilet

fix eye contact with another customer, look at the ice cream and then lock eyes again and dash into the toilet.

do whatever with the ice cream but get rid of it.

go back outside and repeat.

>not keeping a bag of snakes in case you feel like some burger king

This could be a Chappelle Show skit.

Or, better yet, order a small sachet of flying insects, like ladybugs.

Cut open one side and place underneath a booth, or tape to the underside of a table.

That restaurant would be filled with 1500 ladybugs in about 10 minutes time.

Hey, that's pretty good.

Start sell crack to the little kids on the play set telling them it's a special type of rock candy that you smoke.

They don't call me 007 for nothing.

burn it down. Then, everyone is technically 'banned.'

segarlaw.com/blog/myths-and-facts-of-the-mcdonalds-hot-coffee-case/

>...tipped over and poured the entire cup of 190 degree coffee all over her sweatpants, which absorbed the hot liquid and held it against her skin.

>Stella suffered third-degree burns over her lap, which included large portions of her inner thighs and other sensitive areas. She was hospitalized for 8 days and endured several very painful procedures to clean her wounds. She required skin grafts and suffered serious and permanent scarring.

>live in mountains of north carolina
>local BK is a complete shit hole
>never once got an order correct on the first try
>kid brother worked there one year
>he can be an ass, but he's a good employee
>boss treats him like utter dogshit
>eventually find out boss is terrified of snakes
>Friday, brother comes home says he was fired, no idea why
>ask other friend who works there, to find out why.
>saturday, me a three friends setting around drinking like every weekend.
>phone rings
>friend tells me bosses druggy son has brothers job
>useless asshat came in three hours late on his first day.
>having drunk just enough to bring out my hillbilly heritage, I come up with a revenge scheme
>me and friends go to an old abandoned house where blacksnakes den
>fill a sack with at least 10 or more of them of them
> go to burger king and let friend 1 out to film this
>pull truck around to drivethrough
>shake snake sack vigorously
>get to window its the boss
>second he opens the window we toss the sack in a drive off.
>friend videos the entire thing
>boss sees snakes and panics
>runs over dead beat son
>climbs on table screaming like a little girl
>and pisses himself
>entire staff is either panicked or laughing
>eventually pick up friend to see footage
>sheriff was called but he's close friend of the family so they don't do shit.
>best part is they still were finding snakes nearly a week later.
>I'm banned from that burger king for life. my photo is even on the wall with a caption stating I'm to be thrown out if I come in.

The graphic version: the burn grafted her fucking labia to her thigh. Melted skin to skin.

But retards still think this was a frivolous lawsuit because they're incapable of reading.

Post the video.

>This
Pics or it didn't happen faggot

coffee is fucking hot, thats why most people have an issue
its common knowledge and her carelessness with a hot liquid that she knew would be hot is in no way the restaurants fault

When you put a hair in your burger that you have like 90% finished and take it to the counter and say "give me another Because there's a hair in it" but you do this too many times and they catch you on camera ripping hairs off your head and stuffing them into burgers so you get permanently banned from that mcdonalds.

True story

>in no way their issue, he says
>this restaurant routinely prepared coffee at temperatures exceeding both McDonald's recommended temps and after fielding multiple prior complaints and acknowledgements of the issue
>coffee so hot it literally melts skin--this is not normal, this doesn't happen when you spill coffee on yourself

I know you're trolling, but you're still a faggot.

But it was their fault, dipshit. They paid out the ass in settlement money.

They served coffee that's almost at boiling point.

Stop being a faggot.

Too McSoon

>paid out the ass
This is strangely appropriate considering she earned it through her pussy kek

I work at Starbucks. Our coffee is brewed at about 200 degrees when fresh. It's pretty fucking normal for coffee to be that hot.

So you SERVE it at 200 degrees as well?

Occasionally. Usually it sits around for 20 minutes before anyone even orders a cup. We have to dump the pot if it's out for more than 30 minutes, so it'll rarely be lower than like 130-140

Kek

Do this but progressively rip out more and more of your hair until you're pulling bloody chunks of your own scalp out and just throwing them behind the counter screaming you deserve a free happy meal

Prepare 4 1 lawsuit m8

BUT
BUT
BUT

COFFEE DO A HOT OKAY

Commit harakiri in the store

Release feeder mice in resturaunt. Have done many times. They are 30 cents a piece at the pet store. Order your food and have a seat. Transport mce into restaurant in cup with lid. Release $5 worth. Eat slowly and enjoy show. Hopefully it's in black neighborhood. Niggers will absolutely lose their shit. It's like dinner theater.

Commit a felony and get arrested, go to jail. You'll effectively be banned

What does yeet mean

it means YYYYYYYYEEEEEETTTTTT

But what the fuck does it mean you little bitch. Answer me when I ask a question.

Jump over the counter and start dry-humping and groping the cashier/ manager. Do it until you are physically restrained from doing it.

A N G E R Y

Too spoon bro.

YYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEETTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

have friend who banned for live at a local wendy's cause he tried to commit suicide in the bathroom and storming inside with a gun

Cool

kek

Subtle