About to go to my first fight with some nigger faggot from my neighborhood

About to go to my first fight with some nigger faggot from my neighborhood.
I dont have anywhere else i go to talk to millions of people so i came here for some advice
Ive never fought in my life and hes a little bigger than me and muscular but im probably faster.
Hes a stinky nigger meanwhile my ancestors are fucking vikings.
What should my plan of attack be?

Drink mead, work the cattle, and wait for your jarl to agree to a raiding party.

Use feints and aim for his nose.

Don't do this, you might get stuck in his nostril and then it is pretty much over.

Just go for the balls, that's the safe bet.

Feet work avoid getting hit but don't do that movie shit since you've never trained it in your life faggot.

Try to tire him out if that doesn't work play it safe stay out of range wait for an opening and get some good hits.

All in in the first opening if you're brave

Call the cops and say his house is a crack house, odds are he'll end up shot so no problem.

/thread

invite him for dinner
serve him watermelon
cut his throat
???
win

Telling from experience: there is no enjoyment in rearranging another dude's face. You'll most likely lose anyway. If you happen to get lucky, the satisfaction will last a brief moment. If you have any sort of conscience, you'll feel shitty about it immediately after.

Stay light on your feet and keep a distance. Odds are he probably knows how to fight, but not long fights if he is a real "nigga". Wait for him to tire out then start dodging towards him and just do regular r-r-l combos.

>bigger than me and muscular
>never fought

probably only going for the balls or hitting him with something can save your sorry ass, so just go get it kicked

>im probably faster

i simply fail to find sufficient words to insult you properly here hahah

Also, what this guy said-You won't get any satisfaction from it. It's all ridiculous anyway. I've been thought how to box from my dad and have fought so many times(more than 10 at least). I soon as I was able to get a new start in another city, I became pacifist and didn't care if other people annoyed me. So arbitrary.

i don't think it'll be fair tho
what are the chances that he is going to fight alone? monkeys are usually attacking in groups.
try to not turn your back on his fellow sandnigger chimpz, that could be a fatal mistake
bring pepper spray for your safety

Haha chances are your fucked and don't listen to these sperglords saying "dodge until he gets tired then throws some combos" because he might know some grappling moves and just charge you if you keep dodging. What I'm curious is how this started up.

Bring knife. They will either back off, or you get to stab someone.
>lol get ready to get shot by police
>just don't do it in school

>Im probably faster
>He's a nigger

Something here isn't adding up

Only niggers get into fights on the street, OP.

You may talk a lot of shit about Norse ancestry, but your behavior is no better than a common nigger.

ah man, my dwarf warrior had that armor.

Jab him in the cock user

>stuck in his nostril
What the fuck?
You don't wear a cup to a pre-planned fight, either?
>Getting into melee combat intentionally.
Report his nigger ass to the police and carry a gun like any self-respecting American.
Is this high school?
Are you the aggressor?
Just molotov his house.
Jesus Christ, what year is it where faggots roam the streets unhindered like this?

It depends if they like to fight fair or not. At least where I grew up, it was just fists until the other fell then get fucked up. If its some street trash, throw dirt in his eyes, kick him in the balls, and proceed to knock his ass to the ground or choke him out.

No, i take my ancestory serious.
This nigger was talking about doing nasty shit to my younger sister.
No real viking would accept this from a fucking nigger.
Even if i am tech geek, it means i wouldve been a craftsman. And even the finest craftsman can stand hia fucking ground for his family.
This nigger is dead.

niggers swing widley and with out much stance also most of the time if u can get them off their feet onto the ground its over. especially if he has long legs take the nigger to the ground. ive only ever been in fist fights with ignorant niggers who think just cause im some white boy then can beat me and ive always come out winning by a lot

Even professional fighters miss a lot. Just do not stop punching. Sometimes the best defense is a great offense. Dont wait for him to swing first. Walk up and just start punching non stop until he goes down. Do not let up until yoy cant lift your arms anymore. No haymaker bullshit expecting a one punch knockout.

get drunk, drive to fight, run over guy, do a few years. win !

Then claim to be Transgender, wear womens clothes for a few months, no prison at all, double win.

wait till he starts smack talking you then shoot him and the rest of niggers in the balls

He will almost certainly bring weapons and friends. Pre-emptively strike by stabbing him before the fight starts.

>No, i take my ancestory serious.
Pray tell, my enlightened friend, how does one take one's ancestry seriously? Furthermore, how does one "take" one's ancestry?
>another vapid cunt beats their chest demanding respect for absolutely zero accomplishment

>no real viking would accept this
>even the finest craftsman

you wear fedoras don't you... I'm sorry but you're almost definitely going to get your ass beat

do street magic like David Blain and watch him run!

As you're a Viking, drink reindeer piss containing powerful fly agaric alkaloids, go full bezerker. Failing that form a shield wall and strike him down with your + 5 magic battleaxe of frost. Only kidding, you're going to die user.

>never fought
>but im probably faster
user, i just want to ask you what kind of an neighborhood you are living in. And also, for your own safety, don't go bare handed. Blacks originate from africa, they have a big stamina, cause they used to chase their food on their foot. Wanna hear some truth? This nigga will beat the shit out of you and you will lose your enormous self esteem. Niggas fight more, they are being arrested more, they go to prison. Simply report his ass, and be a civil white man. Gl man

Throw a head butt as soon as he gets close enough. Just tuck your head and drive it into his face. He won't expect it and if it doesn't knock him out, it will at least stagger him so you can start swinging.

Take off your clothes and rape him while yelling i am your father

best advice

Nailed it, user simply hadnt found anything else to be proud of except for his ancectry, which i doubt in

Don't show up to the fight. It's going to hurt more when your fight gets posted on worldstar.

hahahahaha
>going to hurt more
>going to feel like getting your dumb ass kicked for a second time
FTFY

im going to skip the usual faggotry advice here.
the simplest of techniques to win this, given the CHANCE that you last more than 10 sec's would be:
Punch to balls, or solar plexus - gives you a brief moment to; smack him on the ears with slightly cuffed hands, this will disorient him enough for you to place a single strike in his face, hopefully breaking his nose.
8/10 people who gets their nose broken will immediately put their hands on their face, which lets you place your hands on the back of his head, and give him a knee to the face.

All of the above should be executed in no more than 10-15 seconds.
This "combo" as you might call it, has proven efficient to quickly end fights numerous times before.

>reindeer piss
I'm going to look this up because I thought it was mushrooms.
No matter what, you've spurred some learning today. Hold your head high.

You never fought yet your ancestors slaughtered mine? That's just pathetic. Just be low and uppercut him and there shouldn't be any problems.

It all depends on the reasons why you fight someone.

When some asshole diddled my at the time 5-year old sister it felt great to turn his face to pulp. Best part is, the chief of police in my town knew about it and let me go through with it.

Walk up to him with your hands up and open saying you don't want to fight over and over. When he gets in your face and smirks over you making you look like a bitch try and slap him with your left hand on the ear. When he tries to avoid this step forward with your right foot and throw a haymaker with your right. Nail him right on the jaw just below the temple. Nigger will be switched off.

Then get beat the fuck up by the rest of the chimps hanging about.

If you never fought before you better make sure none of these combos land like a feather, or the last thing you will hear is "WORLDSTAR" as your head hit the pavement.

your not faster if youve never fought before, you will lack the instinctual ability to move in a fight situation without thinking.

Your only option is to bring him down before a real fight can begin, go for the eyes, throat and solarplexus.... and balls, otherwise curl up into a ball

>meanwhile my ancestors are fucking vikings.

translation:

>"I am american. I was brought up in america, speaking english, watching american films and tv, listening to american music. I have absolutely no connections at all to vikings, and probably dont even know the slightest thing about them.
>But I'm going to imagine I'm "viking" because I'm a sad, pathetic human being who's desperate to try to imagine I'm something more interesting than I really am"

Just run off and avoid a fight. you'll get your arse kicked.

only if he doesnt stiffen up his body as you go to knee him, the better option would be to go full force into the ribs just under his arm pits, as he brings his arms back down, go for the collarbone break

OP dead yet ?

Sucker punch him in the throat. Go to jail for manslaughter for 10 years. Join Aryan Brotherhood. Profit.

run full bore into him, cannon ball into his chest with your knees and when you both go down, immediately break his collarbones, he will be unable to fight back.

A good hard hit with the palm will break a collarbone like a twig, but you have to hit it like you mean it

His baboon friends will just hop in at the first sign of trouble. Just find out how to get in contact with the local KKK and really ruin his day

being hit just under the armpit is incapacitating enough, but if the guy is too muscular to transmit the force into the ribcage, then the collarbone break is the way to go.

The throat punch is too easy to miss, humans instinctively protect this vulnerable area, youl only end up glancing his chin

>meanwhile my ancestors are fucking vikings.
You've never been in a fight, you can't consider yourself related to vikings.

I fight my uncle and my dad every time we get drunk, beat the shit out of eachother, just because we can. Good way to release some aggression, which seems to run in the family.

what he meant was his uncle was on the Vikings practice squad. This nerd will get stomped. You don't come Sup Forums asking for fight advice.

It's got to be the five fingered death punch, followed up by some spectacular macarena dance moves, finish with a trip to the hospital carrying your teeth in a plastic shopping bag.

Head to a point near the place you'll be fighting and make sure its a place where you can clearly see him (don't reveal yourself) call the cops and tell them you've spotted a nigger brandishing a gun and asking ppl if they want to buy crack.

Describe him in detail including what he's wearing. Make sure you are recording when the cops put the orangutans down.

Upload to liveleak. Everyone wins.

This. Also, don't forget to start a discord server.

I don't have any advice for your fight, but I do know niggers...

and I can guarantee you hes gonna have a bunch of his buddies around hoopin and holla-in just waiting for the fight to go south so they can all jump you.

and this is if he doesn't right off the bat pull a knife/gun on you. and then you have to consider they all are gonna be armed one way or another.

theres no going into this situation by yourself and winning. If you beat him your racist and the whole fucking community is gonna come down on you.

If he wins your either in critical condition or strait up dead. white boi got what he deserved.

the only way to win is not to play :(

Okay this is how you win.
Step 1: Swing wide with your weak hand, really reel it back. Draw his attention to it.
Step 2: Knock him with your good hand right at the bottom of the rib cage, knocking his breath out, giving you the opening to combo his ass out.

Yeah, okay there is where a good smackdown is necessary. Jesus, fuck that guy.

>get a gun
>shoot a nigger out of self defence

he is gonna bring his whole clan op. dont go you will get jumped

You don't even have a weapon equipped, you faggot, that nigger is gonna beat the shit out of you. And is that your actual armor or a mog?

Night elf faggot ass faggot ...

Yo but if he "wins" and gets jumped, he gets to says his bitch ass couldn't do it alone.
He gets the cred if he lives m8.
Glory or death, pick one.

Keep him off of you, niggers will always go hard in the beginning and tire out

Try and predict where he'll strike, and use his momentum against him. Also aim for the nuts and call him a fucking monkey.

This

bash his fokin' nigger head in m8 curb stomp his ass dont let him grab you if he tries to punch him in his nigger mouth

>closed hand slap in both his ears
>knuckle punches into the kidneys or armpits
>keep your footing (don't try kicks)
>guard your chin/throat/nose
>aim for his chin/throat/nose
Best advice
>don't show up unless it's really important
>bring buddies in case it goes to shit(even though you probably don't have any)

Chances are you won't be fighting just him. His friends will either jump in when he's losing or ambush you from behind.

sex him

This is the only actually good advice I have seen. as someone who wrestled in highschool I can testify this is how I beat every nigger I wrestled they go hard as shit in the first 2 minutes of the match then you pin them in the third round. But same thing goes for a real fight just tuck your chin and let him swing like an ape

Beat him into submission with a blunt object. A brick, baseball bat, tire iron, etc.. That should do the trick. And bring a knife just in case he plans on jumping you.

Actually, just read these

Acting like you have ever been in a fight must be newfag. Take it from a retired MMA/Navy Seal/Delta force/santa's lil helper. That nigger is going to beat the soul out of you.

...

Dubs never lies.

...

Retreat.

What book is that, mind I ask?

The idea of fists only being more "fair" is retarded and arbitrary. You have legs and a body, use them.

Left hook to the jaw/chin.

Dude you are toast. Just poke his eyes out, hook punch his ears ( hurts worse than jaw), beat the shit out of hit balls. Let him know that you know where his family sleep's and you will set that house on fire. Murder his whole family bro. He won't fuck with you anymore. I promise.

Bring a friend with you who has a bat or something in case things get craZy. If u go alone i guarantee the nigger will bring friends and they will all jump you. I have never known any niggers to fight by the rules.
Get a cup for your balls.

Make sure u wear multiple layers of clothes on ur torso or u will break a few ribs.
Its obvious youre gonn lose this fight so dont wear any glasses or contacts. Wear steel toe boots but no fucking regular shoes. Get gloves. U dont know how to throw a punch so i bet youll break ur hand if u manage to land a punch.

...

Also, something tells me u have long hair so use gel to sleek it back if its lose itll fuck ur vision up and he can pull it

Suck his cock. Karate chop him.

If you've never fought anyone, you at least need to know how to distance yourself to land a punch or avoid one... At least go and get someone to stand in front of you to get a feel for what to aim for. You're not gonna learn much but at least you won't swing like a moron only get pulled aside and forced on your back for some nigger rape.

A moments silence please for a fallen poster on Sup Forums, RIP OP, God speed young hero.