G'morning b

g'morning b,
hope u slept well.
tell me why you will not KILL YOURSELF today.

Because i hope that in the not very distant future they find a way to be immortal. I don't want to die. Never.

Because it's Friday.

Because I am going to kill you.

Live forever or die trying.

Because I can't unsee that there are 5 arms in that gif

Because I have a whole lot of alcohol left to drink

The left one is his left leg, you fool.

one is a leg.

Got an exam to turn in.

Because when I am dead I won't get to look at asses like that any more.

Because the woman i love, loves me but doesn't want to be with me (bitter sweet)

cause every day is an extra day when you're already dead

Why do you always make this thread? Why are you such a loser?

Hmm
Well
My son is just about a year old and he's sleeping peacefully next to me as I shitpost and drink coffee and watch the snow fall.

Pretty good morning tbh

...

>I'm married to a beautiful woman who's my best friend
>we have an active and satisfying sex life
>I have three wonderful kids I adore
>I live in a comfortable home, drive a nice car and own both
>I have a well paying job I find fulfilling
>I work with nice people who respect me
>I have a fairly affluent lifestyle but live well within my means
>I'm on pace to retire in my 50s
>I'm in good overall health
>My credit rating is near 800
>my favorite team ran the table to make the playoff
>My wife and I will be doing what's in your gif tomorrow

>tell me why you will not KILL YOURSELF today.
Because everyday I get asked this question.

wife gave me a wink this morning over coffee. pretty sure it's on like donkey kong tonight.

36, successful, internationally respected in my quiet little field, nice toys, nice 24yo GF, and a brand new range toy on the way next week (USPc .45ACP)

Packer backer detected

Every night. Every night I pray that you'll be here with this same thread, asking the same question and providing yet another animation for us to marvel at.

Every night I look upon the thread with awe and wonderment, with sparkles in my adoring eyes.

You keep me alive, Sublimanon. You keep me here.

I have to take a state exam today which I'm hoping is the game-changer in an otherwise uneventful, depressing life that seems to be heading further and further downhill with age.

>brand new range toy on the way next week
So next week you will kill yourself?

cool. hi guys.
asses are nice.
nice dubs. hope you aced it.

...

I decided that I if I have to suffer to make those around me happy then so be it. I wake up every damn day knowing it will only get worse with every waking moment but I can't quit on myself or those who love me. I may be suicidal but I'm not weak. Somehow I must survive.

Not at all. I'm a fan too. Montgomery really impressed this year.
Allison looks to be great as well.
fucking injuries though

because one day i'll get her

who's she?

no i kill the porngrannies. All the porngrannies

Its shields injury that's hurt the most

Because maybe some day, it'll get better.

I just need to live long enough for trump to fuck up as president so I can shitpost on Sup Forums the way Sup Forums has been shitposting on the rest of the board.
So just a couple more months, then sweet release.

america is shit now.

we're doing okay, but we need to stay activated and aware of what the government is doing.

we have safeguards to our republic, and we as citizen need to call out the government when they do crazy shit.

Because it seems that a girl likes me. A girl I've been into for a very long time.

Because If I die than my tomadachi dies, and it's the only thing I love.

>credit score near 800
>says he owns house
>says he owns car
>sounds like a debt loving American to me

Have a date with a spanish girl tonight. 110 pounds 5ft tall and has a 2 year old. Don't know if i should get involved with a girl with kids though, any advice, never been in this situation before.

Eh maybe one day you'll love the kid like your own. My oldest son isn't even my blood but I love him just the same and he loves me (I hope)

Because youre still alive and im going to outlive you, scumbag

Because my boss is gone skiing all week and I get to smoke weed.

I say go for it. Most of my relationships have been with women who have kids. Unless they're expressly looking to set you up as a surrogate daddy you should be fine. Just be aware that their existence alone means you'll have to form a relationship and any related activities around them, the severity depending on how old they are.

Go to tumblr and masturbate to cuckold porn, gaylord.

Benny?

Mountains of debt and a high credit score are incompatible

Shes taking her to the zoo this morning and asked me if i wanted to go. i said im busy and that we can hang out later instead. bitch tried to lure me in

>nice job, computer scientist, 35h a week, $40k
>nice gf
>few, but very good friends
>healthy
>living in peaceful and wealthy country
>able to travel a lot (no kids yet, yay)

why should I?

My name is Gabriel, sorry man. My son is 18 by the way, I'm old as hell

I owe 18k on my car, 3500$ in credit card debt and i have a 750 score, explain?

I make all of my payments on time with no missed payments and i have a credit line of 25k. You are wrong, sir.

You have to spend money you don't have to owe money and pay that back to get a credit score. So you do have to like debt to have a good credit score

why do you americans (I assume) have credit card debt at all? I mean, you pay interest, don't you?
confused germanfag here

This guy gets it

You're definition of massive debt is different from mine

using a credit card for your purchases and pay them off right away is the best way to increase your score. Maintaining a large balance drops your score.

My idea of massive debt is anything over $0.01

You only pay interest if you don't pay it off right away

I didnt have 30k to pay for my car so a creditor lends you the money because they trust you're not gonna nig him. and yes im american

:)

well 23kish is alot to me, i have over 15k saved up but you obviously don't understand how to get credit. You have to prove that you can pay it back. Even if its small things like getting gas and groceries you should get a credit card and just pay the money back from your debit card at the end of the month. I can't tell if you're confused or na. I know what massive debt is, my sister owes 300k and she is just now finishing her clinicals for med school.

fuck her hard user. good luck.
i hope so.

The credit bureaus have a much different opinion

750 isn't that strong? So..

...

Americans are really fucking stupid and buy shit they can't afford. They make 50,000 dollars a year and wanna live like they are making 100,000 dollars a year

She's trying to spend time with you, man. The fact that she involved her kid is a good sign - she's being straight-up with you from the beginning. I'm not saying to let your guard down, mind you. Always be on the lookout for red flags and such. For now though I say go with it.

That's up to you. If you liked her enough to go on a date with her, then give her a shot. Really couldn't hurt.

Anything over 720 is quite good actually

Just a hunch. I'm old as hell, too.

also i bought this german girl a pizza yesterday, i didnt charge me for delivery fee and she didnt tip, wdf?? also salami is NOT pepperoni. bitch.

750 is very good for a 26 year old alpha male. whats your score? bitch

I have a shit credit score, but I have all the nice things in life all payed off with cash up front. I save up and buy everything took me 15 years to buy my house and 3 years to buy my car, all worth it.

oh ok, I see

that's not exclusive to americans, as I can speak for Germany... we have debt for cars and houses, but having credit card debt like around 3500$ for months or even years is unusual

Not just Americans, man. Lots of First-Worlders. Westerners in particular, in my experience

I have 3500$ credit card debt as of 3 weeks ago. Again i have around 15k saved up in cash but its not smart to just pay off that 3500$. you want to pay it off over time on larger increments to increase credit and show that you can pay off debt. I went on a trip to germany ironically and thats why i owe 3500$.

not all delivery services have delivery fees but rather work with minimum purchase
I do tip the pizza guy, but less than you would do, I assume. Around 10%-15% of total, also in restaurants btw
some people never tip and they usually get away with it without much hassle

I was raised in Vietnam, I'm white but grew up like a gook. It taught me to be careful what you buy and use it to its fullest. Might as well of been born in the 1930s America

If my bill is 10 ill tip 5, if my bill is 15 ill tip 5, if its over 20 ill tip 7 usually, im american but ive work at delivery and restaurant settings so i know how much id appreciate just a few dollars more. Plus the person you tip will remember that and they will hook you up after that ;)

>£4k credit card debt, £4k bank loan, £1500 'miscellaneous credit' and £1k overdraft
>earn £1600/month
>not even 30 yet

get on my level faggot

Hey, that's got to be a pretty unique worldview. Where do you live now?

okay, you win. lol

It's because I'm too much of a bitch.
I'm tired of living, but I'm too scared to kill myself

forgot to add
>about to lose job after 3 months sick leave
>probably end up back on minimum wage if i can even find permanent work again

Nope best thing you could do is pay it all off at once

I wanna. I really do. Just don't wanna do it to my wife.

I live in America now, it's not everyday you meet a white guy with an Asian accent

I know a guy who shot himself in his garage and the bullet went through his skull sparing him going through the ceiling and killing his wife on their bed.

US employees rely on tips much much more than german employees, that's why you tip so much (from our perspective)
anything over 30% is very very generous in germany

Sometimes I tip people 115% and every time they get pissy and say sir it's 15% not 115% then I take it back and tell them I did it on purpose

I'll bet, holy shit. What reactions do you get from Asians vs Whites?

Anal.

Asians usually give me dirty looks because they think I'm making fun of them, since my accent has faded over time. And everyone else just think it's funny

need pic of you pls

Because i am not a coward and i don't run away from my problems.

I'm just your typical 6 foot 2 inch black hair brown eyed 200lb American

Its my birthday... :s

I do have a dual citizenship also which is neat, but I've been in America since I was 17

It is my birthday also, I just turned 18 15 minutes ago and am now legally able to browse Sup Forums. Not worth the wait tbh I think I'm going to start smoking due to the disappointment.

Dont know, feel as if I am destined to do something.

Go back to Gookland, snag a hot Azn wife. If you haven't already, that is.

Hmmm.... Well, I have a short, fat, ugly gf. But she lets me pissed on her and fuck her ass. Buell, she even sucks my dick after it's been in her ass. Guess I'll stick around and think up some more depraved stuff to do to her tonight...