Sup Forums I fucked up. Really bad. Somehow, it involves drugs...

Sup Forums I fucked up. Really bad. Somehow, it involves drugs. I managed to flush a full sized clarinet down the toilet. And this house is under renovaitons meaning someone is gonna take off the toilet and find a fucking clarinet. How do I explain this?
How the fuck can I get it out, if possible?
I'm broke, have no access to time or plumber tools and can't do shit. Any easy fix or am I royally fucked, Sup Forums?

I call bullshit. you can't flush a clarinet down a toilet. clarinets don't bend that way.

or do you live in china or something where the toilet is just a hole in the ground?

good

bich you cant flush your benis downa toilet, yo can only give it a swirly

OP here, pic releated.
also, it's clogging the toilet right now.
this was on new years while I was on coke, btw.

fuck you op
BOOOOOOOOOOOOO
you suck

if that's a full size clarinet I'm elvis

pic related is a full size clarinet, it's close to 2 feet long

go flush your fisher price piano down the toilet too

OP here, any quick methods of suicide? I'm really feeling it tonight, boys.

have you tried getting new reeds

jam a clarinet in your ass and flush yourself down the toilet

kek

Hole to small. Any quick methods of stretching my asshole? I'm really horny tonight, boys.

no you're not

Did you try cleaning the spit trap?

die

you're probably just a little sharp, try pulling the mouth piece out a little

THIS THREAD IS FILLED WITH PUNS
FUCKING KILL ME. PLEASE

are you sure your fingering is correct?

witty but autistic

(you)

SOMEONE HELP ME FUCK