Walk in the streets at night

>walk in the streets at night
>see this

wat do?

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feed her eggs

>be oldfag
>force feed her a bowl of eggs

Make her eat all the eggs.

She's in dire need of eggs

Trow some coins

Offer her my coat to cover up and ri]de home

Whip out my eggbeater

...

Tip her up, empty her out for the next fella.

Never understood why stop at a bowl of eggs. There are so many recipes to try. She could eat eggs for weeks.

www .bonappetit. com/recipes/slideshow/egg-recipes

Check her pussy. If it has been pounded before there's no way for her to tell that she's been fucked a second time.

>dat x-ray do
>thx user

Obviously I'd take a pic and post it on 4cham and ask what other beta fags would do.

run home and make eggs

But we know. Feed her eggs. Aren't you paying attention?

>Have seen a shitty repost, think they are oldfag...

you telling me if that shit is untouched you are just gonna walk away ?

Honestly, I'd love to say I'd rape the shit out of her or w/e, but I'd probably just go get my car and drive her home, chances are she'd invite me in for a quickie anyway

Yes. I have to go get eggs.

yell incoherently about "stealing my cot" while i muscle her to the curb.

>chances are she'd invite me in for a quickie anyway

good man

Eggs.

Why dafuq not, provided her house is more than 5 minutes' drive from that bench there's enough time for legwork to be done.

Or I could say I was an Uber X she just ordered and she owes me $80, but I prefer payment in the form of rough anal

>put jacket around her so she can cover herself
>prop her up against shoulder, take to my house or hers if she can remember where it is
>brew her some tea, she's probably cold
>find blanket if I can
>the tea is ready
>reach into fridge
>get the carton
>hand her tea
>open carton
>grab single egg
>"here, eat this"
>"w-what"
>"just eat it"
>"i-it's okay I'm not that hungry"
>"that wasn't a request sweetie"
>"oh, um, okay"
>she grabs it and attempts to bite into it
>I shove it into her mouth as it cracks, spilling yolk and egg whites on her lips
>clean it with my finger
>shove my hand down her throat
>grab next egg
>"no, ple- MRPH"
>next egg
>she starts to cry
>tears mix in with yolk
>lick off her face
>spit in her mouth
>"yeah, good girl"
>continue until I'm out of eggs
>tie her down as she chokes on the last egg
>"I'm gonna run out to the store real quick"

Fuck her right in the pussy

No oldfag has ever said
>be oldfag

nice b8 though.
1/10, replied.

kek, some one post this video

not gonna lie i'd jack off to this

To all the yesterdayfags acting like 2012fags ITT:
Thanks for being better lurkers than any other post-2010 newnewfags have been, keep up the good work. Don't post on Reddit and don't listen to the SJWs, you can still save the future.

I'd go buy a blanket, some gatorade, and a box of saltines. Place the blanket on her, and put the saltines and gatorade next to her as well. That way when she wakes up she has something to help keep her stomach down.

Fuck anorexia is horrible

Fuck you -- I've been on Sup Forums since 1983.

Something like eggs?

That's it.

I don't even know where the fuck to begin... Why do people like you find dead bodies something to joke about? You think because you get to sit in your warm homes on a computer that you can just joke about horrible things like this? What the actual fuck is wrong with you guys? This is very fucked up, yet crazy assfucks like you are posting dead things like it's nothing. Sick fucks, doing this shit does fucking nothing. So you want to come on an imageboard to be an asshole about things like this? Let me tell you guys, you are all fucking weak. You would never be useful to the world with such behavior you present. Honestly why do people like you guys even exist? I bet you don't even know about half of what people have gone through from then till now when they have someone they've known die. You are all such disgusting bullies. Isn't it bad enough that people go through hardships of their loved ones? Seriously what do you guys really find funny about this? Stupid fuckers I'm so angry right now that I wish I can fucking punch my computer screen so that my fist can get a good hit on that asshole face of yours, OP. Sick fucks. Seriously, just fucking grow up and actually act properly about death. Stupid fuck, keep eating those cheetoes that you stain on your shirts every day. Remember son, all you had to do now, was to reply to this post or your mother dies in her sleep tonight . It's just so simple.

Have an egg.

((( )))

You sound like you need an egg.

need some hemorrhoid cream for that butthurt, ay?

What kind of fucking rape apologist leaves her with weak-ass saltines and gatorade that's practically taking her to the rape dungeon yourself, a true gentleman would wait for her to wake up and "offer" her something with fat and protein to give her a fighting chance at life: eggs.

HEIL!

NIGGA she is holding a drink in her hand, the only thing dead is your sense of humor, go eat a white knight dick

I never said I would leave, I just said where I would put the saltines and gatorade. You would be surprised how well that works to cure even the worst of hangovers.

...

Yeah -- but still not as good as a bowl of eggs.

5/5 m8

I would feed her a nice healthy serving of my cock.

Check for a pulse real quick, and move on if there is one.
If there isn't a pulse, turn her head to the side, call 911 if no one else is around, and perform CPR as needed.
I get the feeling good samaritans get some good pussy.

why would I bring the bowl of eggs? That is your job, I signed up for saltines and gatorade, you signed up for bowl of eggs. This wouldn't be much of a pot luck if we both brought the same thing.

>turn 360° degrees and walk away

But cocks don't lay eggs. Only hens lay eggs.

so ... in other words she wouldn't get any, because no amount of your cock is healthy for anyone

Get the bitch of the bench
Start fucking the bench

Well what if the Cock is a tranny?

This will never not be funny.

well fuckin played

>*180

I thought it was a scrabble thread

abduct the harlot and force her to eat drugged eggs when she comes to

get her somewhere safe and try to snoop a phone number.

Do any of my fellow egg memers have pics of drunk/passed out girls pissing themselves?
I'm really into that tbh

Patrician, but I prefer pizza bikes (or at least pizza maps)

she's not dead, she's passed out drunk, faggot.

Trump! Glad you made it.

Try to suck a log of shit out of her asshole.

Fuck me running....fucking new fag

nigga. eat dicks. i've been here since 1903.

>digits confirm

Eat girl, fuck bike, steal pizza.

That would be easier after she has had time to digest the eggs.

>he gave buzzfeed the ad revenue
Dude. The Huffington Post even passed on that PDF. HUFFPOST. Passed on an opportunity to smear Trump. That's how obviously fake it is. I mean even CNN (the CNN) only talked about the first two pages, that's how obvious it was that it was bullshit.

Like don't get me wrong I'd love to share a fetish with a meme POTUS, but it's even more important that you stop listening to fake news.

Go ask Sup Forums for a link to the PDF, download it yourself, and see how fake it is. The real version is 53 pages long and it's worth the read just for the humor value.

i'd sniff her genitles of coarse

I swear, this gets the newfags every time kek

Trump.

You brought Conway? Tits or GTFO,

I'm genuinely curious, do you get paid by the post or are you just here from Reddit?

The only right answer is to give her an egg during these trying times