Story time

Story time
>Babysit cousin
>blonde hair cute face
>she's 13 so boobies
>sleeps like no tomorrow
>"accidentally" saw her back while she came back from shower
>dick is diamonds
>lets watch a horror movie
>she cant sleep alone
>let me sleep with you
>she tosses and turns while sleeping
>wake up at 1 am,she is hugging me still asleep
>mfw
>her boobies make me hard as rock
>hugs her back
>this goes on for a few days
>got courage to open her clothes
>get her hand on my dick and jerk off with her hand
>lick cum of her hand cuz a little hand fetish
>now even memory of her makes me hard
mfw

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=r-13WKKNn30
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

ITT : Pedo fantasies that never happened

kys

kys fuckhat

>evil
>posts not-evil story

what is it then?
a saint story
I fantasised my cousin

It's called average on Sup Forums.

Let's see if this works again.
>Get dubs

>2016
>voted for trump

Not evil, just retarded

bumping

Stepsister sitting on my lap watching some movie. I have her in my arms and she moves her ass up and down on my d. we make out but thats all :'(

lol

Squeezed a hamster to death when I was 4. Stabbed a frog to death with a metal yard flag marking the gas line in our backyard when I was about 11. Smoked crack from 17-19 and did a lot of other fucked up shit during that time.

Against all odds, I turned out to be a productive member of society doing better financially and career wise than most peers my age.

Man, how is that evil?

> tard story?
> tard story.
> be me, grade 7 at shitty country school
> tard integration program has normies mixed with autismos
> Phys Ed class has a tard in it
> we play intense basketball inside stadium and it's time for drink break
> this tard is loud and gets triggered if you shush him
> literal fury of a thousand suns
> just me and him outside, he tries to push me to get to drink taps first
> I'm too fast for tardy tho, get their first
> he cracks it and kicks me hard in the shin.
> mother dick won't get away with that
> leave taps, as I round corner I lock eyes with him
> shhhhhhh.jpg
> he detonates, engaging tard storm across the school
> four tard wrangles take him down as he kicks and scream
> i shush him again as he's hauled off to tard HQ
> tard can't do shit
> mfw

>2nd year at uni
>Steady girlfriend I was losing interest in
>Ex from high school who's still into me just moved into a flat a short walk away
>Invites me over
>Tell gf I got called into work
>Go there, obviously start fooling around. She seemingly wants me back so she's desperate, lets me fuck her in the arse
>Go home, gf doesn't suspect a thing
>Before bed she wants sex, ends up sucking my cock and then have (normal vaginal) sex
>I didn't shower after butt sex with my ex, so my gf was literally sucking her poo off me
>She suspected nothing

>when I was like 15 I decided I had had enough of WoW and sold my account to some kid over the internet
>few months later get the account back by sending an email to Blizzard that it was hacked

> another tard story
> tard in room by himself for private study
> really just plays mini clip like other tards
> he's getting shitty with a puzzle game, veins on his forehead building and he's sweating like a pig
> I'm staring at him with a few others through creak in door
> hear the faintest of REEEEEEEE's under his breath
> shush him, then quietly close door
> everything is silent, still for about ten seconds
> it all seems to stop, the wind, the noise, dead like it's a vacuum
> suddenly we hear a grunt and then the smashing of glass
> he used tard strength to launch his table through a window
> laptop on ground outside still playing arcade music
> tard runs out and stomps the shit out of it
> some kid tells him to stop it
> disgonbegud.gif
> tardy flips the shits yet again, mauls the kid and throws him into the wall
> he screams about mini clip being defeated
> sounds like "miiiiiimmmm cwiiiip defeeeeeetard"
> hauled off by tard police
> don't see him for a long time

you sound retarded.

> plays nigger handball
> doesn't play hockey

Clubbed a goose to death after it wandered into my yard and broke the necks of its chicks and kept one for a while before i threw it out when i was bored. Disected a bunch of animals trying to keep them alive. I was young and curious

Voted Trump

any inappropriate sex stories

This is Aus, everyone thinks hockey is gay here (if they don't they are also gay)

Hello future serial killer

I slapped an ape in Gibraltar

> pulls boss move
> calls it evil

this thread is fucking burnt

/inb4 - what evil shit you done?

> my evil shit puts me in prison for life.

Share it then

I got me this job one time bussin' tables at a country club. So I could case all the big rich pricks that come in. I pick out this guy, go in one night and do his place. He wakes up and gives me shit. So I killed him. Him and the tasty bitch he was with.

That's the best part! She's fuckin' this prick, see, this golf pro, but she's married to some other guy! Some hotshot banker. He's the one they pinned it on! They got him down Maine somewhere doing time for the crime! Ain't that choice?

I don't believe you.

didn't realise the lowest of the commonwealth were also nigger lovers.

g'day m8 throw a shrimp on the barbie.

Aussie accents are on the list of the worst on the planet.

go fuck an abo

this applies to this

any incest stories

ive watched this
youtube.com/watch?v=r-13WKKNn30

killing small animals at a young age is a sign of psychopathy

1: I associated with a person IRL, once.

2: I declined to use coasters.

Actually Aus accent is voted sexiest on the globe.
>mfw not even ozzy
>stay salty
And it's called a prawn.

what the fuck

i clicked on all the images of trees

i still don't know if i can go on living like this

I have a disdain towards shop fronts.

Ay.. they get to you yet?

Did anybody get to you yet?

ok what the fucking fuck is that

what the actual fcuking fuck!

Ate Chinese food while watching a video of a Chinese prostitute get raped brutally.

It's called a prawn you uncultured swine. I wouldn't expect someone of the likes of you to know that anyway.

madmen

we are surrounded by madmen

Fuck it was removed what was it?

Words can't describe how horrible.. you don't want to go down this path

reupload guys now i am curious too

seriously that was one of the worst things ive ever seen and i still dont understand it

So what's your serial killer name going to be

I saw some bitch screaming but went to get my coffee, refreshed for cinematic effect and it got removed.
Was she kill?
Which one of you faggots reported it?

Just bogstandard emotional manipulation and maybe some animal abuse

Called my dad bald

>didn't lose my shit over someone being sent a dick pic on normiebook

Ass Chekum

hey man can you help me find my tweezers?

Tri dubs

>kills small animals as a child
>literally a psychopath

Yeah, most CEOs are cut from the same cloth. Your success is no surprise.

Crack isn't evil necessarily user, even tried it once myself
Don't really see the hype but I was off my tits on high purity coke so that probably made an impact
That other shit kind of fucked up tho but more indicative of mental issues than evilness
So what's the other fucked up shit?

friendly reminder that crawling through a tube of shit that small for that amount of time would knock you out and kill you from the fumes before you'd barely made any progress at all

Did it make the chinese food more authentic or nah?

I killed a guy and caused a forest fire to hide the evidence.

Honestly did that kid a favor. Taught him a valuable lesson about how if there's a way out, your business associates will take it and absolutely shaft you every time. He should be glad he learned that on a worthless thing like a video game for neckbeards. He's better off without the account anyway.

What's your company name going to be, future CEO? I hope it serves the community by engaging in illegal dumping, whatever it is.

...

It was a video saying "I will delete this video in a few minutes. Pretend it was the most fucked up and confusing thing you've ever seen."

i stole a severed hand that i found at a car accident..

>Be me
>Didn't give the waiter a tip
>Shit was cash

I saw the original post. Dude needs a prosthesis because of you. Nice going if you aren't lying.

>tfw yoshikage kira is shitposting on Sup Forums

Why would it have broken the terms of service by doing that? It would have just said video removed.

I fucked a 14 year old.

But I was also 15 at the time because she was my high school gf, so I guess it's not that bad.

>tfw you're a generally stand up guy and can't contribute

i broke swallows nest with little birds in it and 2 died immediately, then i threw the one that was still alive for chickens to eat

I saw half of it. A bound and gagged naked woman emitting guttural screams.
Then I got coffee and pressed F5
:(

I fucked a 16 year old when I was 21. She had way more sexual experience than I did and was quite persistent so I gave in. No regrets.

>thinking Kira would leave behind evidence or steal evidence from somewhere else rather than just harvesting his own severed hand

GTFO, Josuke. You are a dumbass and you understand nothing.

I could have done the same with a local slut but decided not to.
She was attracted to me because I am older and somewhat handsome.
I proceeded to shitpost text her until she called me a creep and blocked me from everywhere lal

I looked at the video name and it translated to ' Woman Tortured With Shots On Vagina And Anus'

I came on a 6 year olds feet while she was sleeping

>>tfw you're a generally stand up guy and can't contribute
>statutory rape.

>totally legal in most parts of the world except backwards USA
>totally normal biologically
>evil because muh law said so

>15 and 14 year olds engaging in consentual sexy times
>statutory rape

Fucking kek. If I had received any nudes from her, THAT would've been illegal. The sex wasn't.

Are you retarded? Two underaged peers having consentual sex is not rape in any shape or form.

and your age at the time was?

Exactly. I've told friends about this and some of them think it's wrong or creepy. I give no fucks, she was hot and the puss was tight and delicious.

I hit my hamster. Guys I'm really sorry about that, I was young and stupid

19

Why?

I mean, there was definite risk involved, but it's not evil.

Creepy is in the eye of the beholder. A 5 year difference is not a big deal though, even if she was that age. I dunno how you managed to put up with her petty, immature bullshit in the meantime, but she had more than enough of her faculties to provide or deny consent. Many states in the US even have 16 as the age of consent.

what's evil about that?
it's just retarded

how did you manage to get your dick in it?

Because otherwise they would've found out he killed the guy

Why would you hit something that small and helpless? Jesus Christ man, you're sick.

Was it self defense? Hamsters can be mean little motherfuckers.

Not an evil story but a story non the less.
>Be me
>Have gf
>Everyone thinks she's attractive
>Disgusted by sight of her
>Lazy eye
>Date her cos everyone says I should
>Try to get to know her
>Normie scum only finds stale memes funny
>Literally just fuck her whenever she comes over
>One day try doggy style
>As I thrust the stench of her filthy ass blows in my face
>Hyperventilating because fucking
>Almost throw up
>Break up with her the next day
>She wants me back
>Says she will do anal
>Ohgodno.jpeg
>Nobody understands why I broke up with her
>Can't say anything because I'm too nice
>Avoid her and get new gf
>Never did doggy style again

lets counts how many seconds till he drinks the drink that bitch gave him?
i say 2 min

Keep those tears coming lad

>find out gf is human
>WTF.jpg
>initiate breakup.ext

Autismo.

>Takes 3 seconds to clean asshole

>Implying i'm the autismo

Used to kill frogs all the time. Then later I used to spend my allowance on hamsters ND shut, just so I could kill them. My favorite thing to do was to cut the legs off, pour some kerosene on them and set them on fire. Not a lot, but just enough to cook them for a bit, then I'd rinse and repeat.

Oh shit you meant there was shit in her crev. Yeah, fuck that. She was probably American too, amirite?