ITT: SHARE YOUR SECETS

ITT: SHARE YOUR SECETS

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I work as a male cam model, even tho I have a normal good paying job. Nobody knows.

bummp

I ate Chipotle and drank beer tonight - just shit my brains out. Some of the shit was ordinary and sunk right to be the bottom of the toilet. I thought I was in the clear, but then my intestines said, 'You ain't done yet, mother fucker.' My asshole then ejected a pyroclastic flow of steamy hot shit, most of which was floating and quite corny from the burrito I ate. 10/10 would do again.

nice

my dick is diamonds

I'm 18, homeless and I sneak into a farmer's shed at night to play dota2 offline with bots. It's raining tonight and I'm scared he going to come in the morning and find me because I can't leave :(
Pic for proof

My car fingered her friend in the back of my mom

How do you have a laptop and a camera, fake/10

I swear to god I'll kill you if I get the chance, yeepz.
You and Jargon and Sharks too.

I want my girl fucked by a couple of guys

i lie in these threads.

also, i am a fairly attractive woman who pretends to be a man on Sup Forums.

Balls or GTFO

>pyroclastic flow of steamy hot shit

I have had a laptop for ages, and I don't have a camera, I've got a phone.
This is possum-bro.

Damn it, picture didn't send. Lemme try again

...

Nig, you best try to get some kinda job or something.

Why would a farmer have internet
Just some retard exploring his parents garage/10

I'm white :(
This is me a couple of years ago in the school library

Gang banged an older woman when I was 18

i would brake things at work and make it so it looked like it was broken during shipping

Please put the minimap on the left you nigger

I blame my farts on our dogs.

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Bruh.. OFFLINE Dota.
Combine harvester for proof

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The 'nig' was not really the important part of this post

Group of us fucked a 28yo

>filename
Lmao nice try bruh, try harder or at least use better b8

I'm being bullied at home everyday and I can't move out yet :(

Nice trips
Also I know but I can't be around people without freaking out. It's autistic as fuck.
There's also this is Wolseley just rotting in here

ohhhh i thought you meant like sweet old granny, come to think about it if you did she would of enjoyed it. dont think old ladys get much dick

I've only had sex with one chick and I'm 25.

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I'll take a picture of the wall, the harvester and my laptop at the same time of that'll prove it?

>There's also this is Wolseley just rotting in here
They did that when they were new. They had to speed up the production line to get them to the dealers rust-free

hes going to rape you when he finds you

They don't get much.
And because of that they make great lays.

Ask your neighbor if you can work on the car in exchange for power from time to time. You can use your laptop to research how to fix it and learn a skill that allows you to work alone with your hands.

You first

You have an internet connection.
Learn coding and do odd jobs?

yea what do they have to lose other than another broken hip

That's my fetish. I'm a faggot trap. Used to be at least. Now I'm just a fag.

Why is this hard to believe for some of you?

This is rat bro

Kek no. We fucked a chubby who was desperate. Two of the group lost their virginity to her that day though

I have mobile data. I'm on my phone standing at the opening of the shed because I don't get reception if I go sit down..

ahahahahahahah

I want to fuck my girlfriend in the ass.

nice keri juice mang

Go to your local library and use their internet.

It's rainwater in a bottle :(

you should make a deal with the farmer

I am a guy and married

secretly sucked off a guy

labour for a place to stay

are you married to the guy you sucked off

but its a keri bottle and thats what counts. you could make a bit of money begging or going to Internet cafe and doing online surveys for money, if that helps ya.

Like I should just walk up and say "Hey, I'm the homeless urchin that stole food out of your fridge because I was so hungry I was in physical pain, got any work for me?"

Bitch was great and wicked cute face

See, some things you reveal, and some things you don't.

Desperate fatties are usually great in bed.

The town is very small, there's no internet cafe unfortunately. Anyways, I seriously can't go into crowded places

had a 12 yo gf when i was 25.

I found some dude online and he lives 2 streets away.
We meet every weekend to play vidya and have some drinks, we rarely drink anyway.

The thing is he's arab and he calls me ''habibi', like to hold me and cuddles me as I play.

>i'm a feminine twink and i sometimes crossdress

Not that fat just chubby. Huge ass though and great facial target kek. Had hours of fun with it

well if you wwant to go that way then for sure. but be like hey i ended up in your barn i have no place to stay do you know of any places for work or to stay or can i possibly work for you. best case he accepts, worst case they find you teeth in pig shit

I don't think he's retarded, he knows someone has been in the shed and someone took his food.. he'll think it was me and beat me

but from the sound of it the town bike, which is all cool i did the same. well after a few other chicks but i was horny and she was in my truck

>cumming literally anywhere other than inside

I guess that's fair enough. I might try it but I might also bitch out. I don't know where he lives and it'd be really awkward if he just found me wandering around on his farm

Great fun kek. Wish I didn't move away. Would love another ride in her

true it would be awkward but most people are nice towards younger people, but wait what country are you in ? guessin the states and south since its raining. so it might be a bit more scetchy, i dont test your luck. or get to the nearest town and try to find a halfway house

i like to meet with older guys on craigslist 40 and older and let them take advantage of me and use me for sex im 23 the age gap really turns me on and especially love it when im drunk and guy thats old enough to be my dad takes advantages of me and uses me for sex

You are very good looking and that is extremely valuable in and of itself. Become a male model.

they key thing is if im going to smash that ill smash while im fucked up

daddy issues ?

I live in New Zealand.
On another note I just turned my headlight on after hearing squeaking and a cat just fucking killed ratbro.. honestly a little shattered, I fed that little guy for ages.

Smash it in and ruin it?

shit not ratbro, and holyfuck i was off. i dont know bruh do what you need to do to get situated

You would be surprised how normal that is. A lot of people coast through social circles purely on momentum, but in reality making friends and getting laid actually requires effort, if you're not happy about it just try harder.

Those fucking moths

no more like run away and not want here to envolope me with her ass

If that's a secret then your relationship isn't going well.

If true That's actually kinda sad

I do try when I can.

That rat was literally my only fucking friend.. I haven't even spoken to another person in like 2 weeks. Honestly that really fucking hurts wtf

Kys

If he's any decent kind of person he will recognize honesty, and respect that along with your situation.. Besides what the fuck you gotta lose? Getting your brains blown out you is loads easier than an hero, and if you're truly the hopeless urchin you claim to be, you should just do it.

i had a pet rat a few years back it was dank af

guis does anyone remember that video of the gay guy whos killed his boyfriend then is groping it and it had that famous song in the background? source plz

Me too dude, where you at?

dont worry i found it 1 lunatic one icepick

arent secrets mean to be keep in secret?

Can't do it, way too much of a pussy. Having nothing makes you appreciate a lot actually..
Yeah I had one too that was pretty chill. I'm going to fuck that cat if I see it again ;(
There's a bunch more pics for proof

Kek. She was amazing from behind user

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bestshockers.com/1-lunatic-1-ice-pick/

That ?

Tiny ass town called Waimate. I have a place 8k out of the actual town though. Just a little shit shack I built but it keeps the rain off

just slappin that ass around showing the bitch whos boss, then she moans grab me by the kankle. you bust your load every where it was glorious

Wrong island dude, would help you if I could.

try and get your ass back there then bro and avoid possibly getting fucked, or fucked up

Not sure if secret but thus just happened:

Gf has a 17 year old niece. Niece and i where in the kitchen as we both wanted a drink and gf + rest of family are in the living room. Gf is 27 and im 28.

So niece is wearing a loose dress and behind me. Im grabbing a glass with my back towards her and as i turn around she is standing there , lifting her dress and showing me her pussy, which was neatly shaven btw.

So me being me, zips down my flyer and takes out my cock. Which obviously was hard right away. So we just stood there, looking at eachother for 10-15 seconds.

She thrn just walks away casually.
Not sure what to do, i can probaly get some groping in there.

Really want to lick that pussy