Hey Sup Forums

Hey Sup Forums
So I'm going to blow a guy from craigslist tomorrow and I need some tips on how to make sure I'm not meeting a serial killer.
Also general cragislist stories thread

bump

meet in public first, let someone anyone know your whereabouts.

but what should I tell them?
none of my friends or relatives know I'm gay

Don't bite unless he asks, eye contact, swallow.
It's a blowjob unless you literally puke on his dick he'll probably like it (and some guys are into vomit as well)

Text them the address and say that you texted them that because you bought something and will forget the store's address if it's defective

You could write a dead mans note. Write down the address, name, date, and contact of who you are meeting, leave it on your pillow or night stand. If you disappear, cops have leads.

>need some tips on how to make sure I'm not meeting a serial killer
Abort the meeting.

This

>gf dares me to shave my legs so that "I understand her pain"
>nair them, tell her I shaved, it wasnt too hard
>she gets mad, leaves to visit her parents for a few weeks
>we have not had sex for 3 months
>alone, drunk, with my very smooth legs
>cl, m4m
>some fag gives me his room number
>head over, he is loving my legs, but he is a bottom
>figures, He sucks my dick while I think about how to breed the best Garchomp
>he sticks his fingure up my ass, dick goes limp
>figures
>try to ass fuck him, but he hit my bottom switch, so I start blowing him
>still trying to figure out how to get the best IVs on my Garchomp
>stick a couple figures up his ass, then get a mouthful of salty jizz
>swallow, cause I have standards
>He jacks me off while I think about my life
>we chat afterwards, cool dude, in the closet all his life, somehow has 8 kids from 7 different girls
>figures
>go home and tell myself never again
>two days ago i got railed by a CL stud
More?

yes please

did you get that garchomp?

why? I'm just nervous in general about craigslist.
he didnt have any red flags

NO RED FLAGS?
ABORT!!!

Why? Are you serious?
That is the only way to be sure m8. The fact that there are no red flags yet doesn't mean shit.

Look up real horror stories aboyt serial killers and rapists in neighbourhoods.
9/10 times people are shocked that their neighbour could do such a thing.

And you think you can get a good judge of his character from a CL ad? C'mon...

I would also like to know

Yes, but only because I got in touch with a hacker
>I drink Absinthe and Red Bull, tastes like fuck, but damn does it make my motor run.
>still with gf, still have sex every 3-6 months
And she wonders why I dont propose to her
>she is off with her friends on a shop trip
>I am getting off with a dildo in my ass, and a vibrator on my dick
Highly recommend it. Get hard, and edge as usual, then toy up ass, then vib on dick, while watching tranny porn, after drinking Absinthe and Redbull
>get the overwhelming urge to rebel against life
>post on CL, almost a regular
>almost
>find a studs, but they keep bitching about pics of my toys, dont do pics
>finally find someone to close the deal, and what luck he is a block away
>take shot and stumble to his house
>nice house, nice car, greets me at the door
>get 5 feet inside, and I drop my pants
>opps
>he puts a hand on my back and bends me over a chair
>rails my lubed ass, I want to play with myself, but I also dont want to fall over this chair.
>god damn I didnt even get his name
>Finally got civ 6, played as Trajen cause, well I do get ass fucked sometimes
>stupid fucking Spain always warring me
>he nuts my ass with a mighty slap, might have hurt if I wasnt hammered
>pull up my pants, kiss him, he gives me 50 bucks
>never asked
>leave
>realize i haven't jizzed yet, decide not to
>been horny for my for thr past two days

Don't worry because he won't even show up. That's craigslist for ya.

Aren't you worried about Tapu lele with choice tho?
Why garchomp?

The stories are hot don't get me wrong but getting a garchomp its kinda weird when you can get a perfect magnezone or something like that...

Tapu can suck a dick, Ultra Beasts are where its at. The garchomp story was like 6 years ago, shits old nigga

>month ago
>t4m
>you get all sorts of all sorts
>get off work at my buttfuck graveyard shift
Not the butt fuck i want
>check that cl, tranny needs a ride north
>tell him "ass gas or grass"
>he says ass, hell yeah
>roll up in my Coupe De Ville
Thats french for "Boat"
>get rolling, only a 20 min drive
>he wont stop talking about chemistry
>like how fluorine oxidizes better then oxygen
>I am off in my own world, this time thinking about how ass my Alakazam is
>like, it is shit
>roll up to the spot
>secluded ally
>he wants to jump out, remind him that he wont get any future rides if he bounces
>he says ok, and walks to the otherside of my boat
>starts blowing my, with anger, like, this tranny hated my
>that just makes me wanna jizz harder
>but why does my alaka-
>jizz in his mouth, he spits it on my croutch
>he leaves and I drive home with a stain on my pants
>find out you can judge IVs in sun and moon, totally makes my day

See, that first line is the one that makes a difference between a homosexual and a faggot
Celesteela can suck my dick...

Why the fuck are you with a girl if you only have sex every 3 months? What is wrong with you?

if he is a good serial killer, you won't know till it is too late. That being said....

pro tip - try to poke a bit. email him something he wont be happy about but is minor and see if he makes a big deal about it.

that is pointless... all that will do is help them find his dead, mangled, cum filled corpse.

Have two serial killers ever accidentally met on Craigslist?

yes but they killed each other so no one really knows what happened

Rent nigga, I dont make money, and roomates blow

>yes but they killed each other
Bullshit. They just brojob eachother, share stories and call it a day.

Trust me.

Ausfag here. Met a chick from CL one night after posting an ad:

>10pm
>She mails me about my ad, 24, young asian, tight body, a cup, long hair and sexy body
>she wants to meet in an hour
>cant believe my luck.mpg
>drive to meet her in a carpark somewhere, she is parked there and i pull up along side
>she jumps in, we talk about where we could go
>decide on a park about 5 min drive away
>drive, get out, walk into a park with trees and play equipment, hold her hand as we walk
>sit on park bench under moonlight through trees
>make out
>push her to her knees, she sucks me
>i sit back, she climbs on
>not enough room on bench
>move to play equipment behind bars where top of slide is
>sit on edge with feet on step
>she rides me hard, loves every inch (big cock here)
>she took it like a champ, most chicks find it hard to take being thick
>i end up cuming hard as she is riding
>drive her back to her car

>find out a day later she has a bf, wanted a once-off thing
>Loved it but wish she'd wanna fuck again
>still cant believe she chose me over the 10,000 other ads up at the time, she was a stunner

Bullshit. She was bait and she lured you into a secluded area where 15 large men passed you around, leaving you gaping wide and bleeding.

Lol no - still cant believe i took the risk though, and it paid off

It is possible