Sup Forums. I'm drunk. For the first time in years I cried...

Sup Forums. I'm drunk. For the first time in years I cried. I feel like I'm fucking infested with a deep rooted depression. I'd explain, but there's too much to talk about. 21 pilots is all I've listened to for the past hour, the lyrics suddenly make sense in every way. Is this drunk teenage angst? This is shit is always with me, but I'm usually one of the most outgoing, happiest guys I know. What the fuck is wrong with me tonight

>Is this drunk teenage angst?
Yes

>21 pilots
yeah its drunk teenage angst

I know I'll be over this by tomorrow, just can't get over it right now. It's less of a "nobody cares about me" mind set, more a "I don't give a shot about anything and that's sucky" kinda deal
>for the record I usually fucking hate the woe is me tumblr faggots

You know that, "nobody cares" feel. Use that for strength. You get to be whatever you want and Noone care.

its ok to be sad.

liquor plus sad = really sad

post your dick and balls now please

>What the fuck is wrong with me tonight
I get it as well. Sometimes you just need to cry. Doesn't need to be a clear reason. It's just you being a human being. I have no reason to cry but sometimes I do it anyway.

Find someone you care about to say all your personal shit to or you'll turn out being a lonely fuck. Not giving a shit about anything is also a great way to become lonely

>For the first time in years I cried.
you should do it more often - lets off some steam. You should also go drop $200 on a profssional massage at a nice spa near you.

maybe your just a bitch

underage b&

thats why i went with r&m honestly, i like to think im a prety careless, do what i like fella, only tonight that whole concept has turned on me
solid point, im no slut, dont be so crude daddy
has been a while, you may be right, again though cant shake he feeling that this is always a lingering thing. i go with drugs and booze way too often when im feeling not-so-chipper though

had a gf a week ago, dumped her because i didnt care about her as much as she did me
Your bitch always and forever daddy

>i go with drugs and booze
Maybe you should quit the drugs and have a break away from booze. Either way it's your choice.

I had an irrational fit of crying last night after I cracked my phone screen. My life feels like this paradox of a series of misfortunes that have been happening to me but really overall im incredibly fortunate. My life is basically perfect in a million ways and when anything bad happens I dont really have any right to complain but just stupid bad shit has been happening to me constantly over the last few months.

Crying is cathartic. Real men cry, so let it all out, friend.

I cried because I loved my school so much that I was gonna miss being there. I'm still in school...

21 Pilots is Tumblr Simple Plan

Series of bullshit

>got arrested for possession this summer and lost roughly $3000 to lawyers, court fees, seized nice vaporizer and ~ounce of weed
>on probation for another 7 months
>crashed on a bicycle and shattered my front tooth on the pavement, had to have it extracted so I'm missing a tooth right now
>hit a deer with my car and knocked out my turn signal light
>spun out on a exit ramp and smashed up my hood and sides of car a two months later
>last night dropped my phone and shattered the screen

The paradox is I have the money to get an implant, I just got a new car, I could afford a lawyer and after probation charges are dropped...

Nice

theoretically, thats a really good idea, but i feel like drugs (shrooms/MDMA specificaslly) is what led me to understand my own feelings. whether or not that's a negatuve effect of the drug or or if the drug just brought up the inevitable feelings i dont know.
understand you, although little things likt that (dpwn to my own clumsyness more oftn than that) do get to me, this time seems a lot bigger/more significant than anything like that
i exaggerated with the time since ive cried honestly. ive obviously cried before, but this seems more my general thinking than the need to cry

yeah and I just paid like $75 today to fix the screen, so what big deal I'm fucking fine. It was just one more thing on the pile of bullshit. My life is great but I'm still lonely and miserable.

Simple plan is MySpace green day

>theoretically, thats a really good idea, but i feel like drugs (shrooms/MDMA specificaslly) is what led me to understand my own feelings
Hmm you seem like a reasonable guy but I feel like you're a little bit addicted. I'm a bit concerned with your health I don't want you to not only fall into a deep depression but also die.
I think you should at least take a bit of a break just for a week or two and just see without the drugs why you feel so upset some times. Just relax with the booze just a little bit. Maybe just have some booze a week and see how you feel then and then you can decide for yourself which is best for you to do which quitting or not quitting. Do you have any family that you still see or a girlfriend or a boyfriend? Are you close with them? What age are you?

ive never cried because of small things like this. im gonna try and give the general outline of what was wrong tonight/ obvs im drunk so dont judge me on my story telling.

I feel like life is ultimately meaningless without religious faith. i have no interest in religion and cannot see myself ever being involved with it.

after eliminating faith, what is there to live for? yourself? being without faith means that i belive, with certainty, taht death is IT, theres nothing after that, its just fucking nothing. after that i found that the thought of dying upset me not because of the thought of missing out on life, but because of the effect it would have on family and friends. i cant be responsible for breaking people like that, although i already did it with my gf recently, and i dont even know why, i just didnt care about her, but i really cared about how much she cared about me and how i hurt her by dumping her.

everythong in my head is contradictory, i care about everyone, people care about me, but i dont care about what people think of me, i care about what people think of themselves and how they feel as a result of my actions if they do care about me. and i dont care about myself at all. my heads a fucking mess right now and i have no idea if any of this made any sense

as ive said, broke up with long term gf recently, broke her, barely affected me, family very close, but still not able to ecplain how i feel to myself, let alone others

I relate with you in some ways so don't worry I understand. You see I thought long and hard about the concept of death and life and because as an atheist life seemed meaningless but then I looked at the possibility of the human race as a whole living. Me living is very improbable and so are a lot of people's lives around me are improbable. You see I think improbability and rarity in things to have meaning themselves since it's just amazing. Think about it. I only live just so I can understand the world better. I want to understand the unknown. This made me love everything and I mean everything. This world is like a perfect world to me since we're evolved to adapt to our environment. I was bullied, abused and all that shit. Sure I have possible trauma and morality issues but I still see value and meaning in life to an extent. I may not be the most sane person either but I am in fact a smart person. You just need to find yourself. And maybe I need to do the same since I still don't know everything about my brain and my little world. Point is why don't you give it some meaning? Why don't you do something good for society and shock people by being so nice. Now this may be hard but dedication and hard work is the key to happiness and to finding yourself. For the sake of your own mentality and health I do highly advice that you quit drugs and/or lay off the drugs for a while in order to understand things more. Drugs don't make things meaningful. It can make you feel good and create illusions but that's not the same thing. Illusions aren't real.

Hmm and your age?

18

forgot to add that

honestly think tha working hard and dedicaing my life to my work is some of the best advice ive had. im doing alright in university but perhaps id feel much better about myself, and life in turn, if i put that little bit more into it. what i fear, and what i think of a lot, is the inevitability of working my life away for the occasional glimpse of happiness through a fucking holiday, maybe a camping trip if im feeling spicy

And what about your friends? Are you doing alright with them? No problems?

When everyone's problems are in a pile, I bet you pull your own back, because you already know how to deal with them.

not really, obviouslyive always had a couple insecurities, bullied in high school, little bit of an autist back in the day and that stuff lingers every now and then. i like to think im over most of it though, who hasnt been bullied these days. like to think it made me a stronger person

>what the fuck is wrong with me tonight

You're drunk and trying to find a meaning to a pointless, bland band with very boring and meanless lyrics. Drink some coffee

You shouldn't fear you should ignore that fear and thrive to do 110% but when you take your holidays you should take long ones and don't worry because depending on how well you work and where you work your fellow employees and hopefully your boss (depending on if he's a nice boss or not) he should understand. If you want then just do your average. Sometimes you don't need to push yourself sometimes you just need to take a break. If you work hard and take a couple of breaks then those breaks should make you feel like you deserve the breaks. Don't be too lazy and don't stress yourself working too hard. It's best to start off like everyone else first then gradually doing better. As for the holidays then sure bring a few friends with you to a camping trip why not? It sounds fun.

your a young person, you have not even experienced divorce , kids, ect ect. Take it from me, there is no day you wake up and it's all better, you have to learn to manage. Get all the help you can, do not fight it, I wasted best years of life in denial.