ITT: Times we acted like The Joker
ITT: Times we acted like The Joker
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>Mom tells me to take out the trash.
>I switch the recycling with the garbage.
>listening to Tokio Hotel on loop
>mom enters my room, asks me to take out the trash
>whisper under my breath "fuck u mom"
>leave the garbage bags outside the garbage bin
that will teach them haha.........
Wait, you did what?
>City picks up the trash.
>You get a bin for garbage and a bin for recycling.
>I switched the contents of the two bins.
Shit. Sorry if I wasn't clear. My hands were literally shaking when I typed that up. First time I ever did something that crazy. Adrenaline was through the roof
you did whaaaaaaaaaaat?
Fuck it's 3am already. Should I go back outside and fix the garbage??
Jesus, what was I thinking. You think I went too far? That's literally fucking with the environment. Literally fucking with mother nature itself.
>wake up in the middle of the night
>realize i'm about to get the poops
>squeeze out the brown mustard in the bed
>pee too because i passed the point of no return long ago
>my mom yells at me in the morning because I'm caked in doodoo and squirts
>I tell her it's all part of the plan
I think I took it too far this time XD
Let your mom deal with it!
HAHAHAHAHA
one time i went to get dubs and check em faggot
YOU MAD MAN
Nice.
>spill soda and popcorn on theater floor
Wagecucks will clean this
we'll break the system, user.
HOOOOOOOOLY SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT
>tfw
I love doing this
ABSOLUTE CHAOS
>mom says to go to bed at 10:00PM
>went to bed at 10:03PM
What is this meme called. My fav is the spaghetti one
>freshman year of college
>tell people I can get them alcohol cheap but I double the price of it
>get a hobo who lives next to gas station to buy alcohol so me and him have something going.
>sometimes people didn't have money to pay so they would just give me random shit in their dorm room
>over first semester my room is filled with weird knick knacks and paints plus a keureg coffee machine
> don't know what I do with it so I stuff all this shit down trash shoot.
>gets clogged 3 floors below mine.
>they have to replace entire system of trash shoot because it was so bad
Mfw I got to listen to people for the next 3 months manually take down their trash from a ten story building asking who would do such a thing
...
>mom is driving me home
>see hairy styling shop
>ask her if she's been there
>she says she doesn't like their kind of haircuts
>I reply, you mean ones that aren't trashy?
true story btw
>ordering delivery late night online (with vpn of course)
>see that a pizza place closes at 3am
>send my online order for an xl gluten free pizza with no cheese on one half and coin sausages and other half barbaque sauce and ground peppercinis
>wait for the delivery boy to come
>3:27am this shlub arrives
>when he asks for money, tell him I don't have cash and ask if he can call back the store and pay with my mom's credit card over the phone
checked
>See 8/10 qt on wedding
>Was actually introduced to her a few months ago
>Hi user, i remember you! How are you doing?
>Hey gril, i was not sure if we had previously met, this makeup looks bad on you, easily +5y older
>....
I was really surprised by myself, i did not expect an idiocy of this magnitude
Post more bears.
>buy sam's club membership
>membership expires
>show them my card and still go in sometimes for the food
HAHAHAHAHAHA WHO'S GONNA STOP ME, BATS?
>mom tells me to only take one fudgsicle
>I take two
>those quads
I really hope you die a horrible death for posting that gif. Fuck you asshole.
Sage.
>mom tells me to take out the trash
>take out the garbage instead
>mom tells me to take out the garbage
>take out the rubbish instead
>mom tells me to take out the rubbish
>take out the litter instead
>mom tells me to take out the litter
>take out the junk instead
>going to my grandma's funeral
>whisper to my mom "what if the plane crashes?"
>she says it's not going to crash
>"But isnt that the next step in your master plan? Crashing this plane with no survivors?"
>TSA agents swarm from every direction
>mom is blackbagged and swept away
>Agents come to question me
>assume the CIA powerstance (naturally I am wearing a dark jacket, khaki pants, and a blue shirt, as it is my day to day outfit)
>"I'm CIA. You don't get to bring friends."
>they apologize and disperse
>72 hours later mom is released from custody after intensive interrogation
>she's now on the no fly list
MADMAN 4u
u4 NAMDAM
How can society still function with these madmen out there
nah
i could watch this all day
>mom gives me $5 to go buy some milk
>buy milk and a chocolate bar
>tell her milk was just expensive
dont ask for dubs
get dubs
SOMEONE STOP ME
...
>them quads
>that gif
The time is.right.fucking.now!
call me when you get trips
Well there was that one time I crippled batgirl..
I hope you bought 2 gallons with that money or else your milk is way too expensive.
>told to look both ways when crossing the street
>I only look one way
>that's it young man! no handjobs for a week!
Poured my milk before I put cereal in the bowl.
This gives me the chills, absolutely insane.
Drank orange juice after brushing my teeth haha
fuck off
That's something only the joker would say
>school shooting happens in my country
>let my mom know I have no sympathy for the dead
>she calls me a nihilist
>mfw
You get no dubs
because I stole them
>at the local super market
>picked up my red bull 6 pack
>checking out
>cashier says "have a good day!"
>i didn't
>rent a vhs tape of power rangers movie from local shitball mom n pop video store
>watch movie while furiously masturbating with bread pudding
>turn it back in
>wasn't kind, didn't rewind
I still dream about it some nights.
>
Wagecuck at the front desk told me I could use the toilet but only if I promised not to make a mess.
Don't worry wagie, the bowl is still squeeky clean!