I'm going to be flying for the first time in March (Boston to Paris) and I'm nervous as fuck

I'm going to be flying for the first time in March (Boston to Paris) and I'm nervous as fuck

Any tips?

Should I smoke weed before? I feel like it would either make it better or much, much worse

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Have a drink or two but don't get drunk. Weed is hard to say since people react differently to it. You can't really go wrong with a little bit of alcohol. I'd say get a window seat and try and enjoy to view, but its transatlantic so there won't be much to see. Also remember that you're statistically much safer in a commercial air liner than you are in a car.

Thanks man. I think I don't like it because I won't be the one in command

flying is really safe, don't worry too much. Long distance may be a bit uncomfortable due to the long time it takes, but nothing to worry about. Make sure you have something to do during the time. Bring a book or something.

>Should I smoke weed before?
Do you want to get into serious trouble with airport-secutrity / border police /whatever?
If not, don't risk it. You don't want any traces of drugs on you.
If you cannot stand it without some sort of drug just do as said and have a beer or two first, that's no problem.

>flying for the first time
jesus christ its 2017, how have you never flown?
Have you also never used indoor plumbing or a telephone?
Has calculus been invented where you live yet?
What type of dinosaur do you ride to the quarry every day?

just relax. you're more likely to die by lightning than in a plane crash.
have a drink or two (don't get drunk) before you board.
do they serve alcohol on flights anymore? if so, bring your credit card. drink as needed, but not to excess.
and be polite, especially at customs. and keep your sense of humor conservative, if not zipped.

>customs agents are required to have their sense of humor surgically removed as a job requirement.

you'll be fine.

Perfectly normal to be nervous first time, takeoff can be jarring and so can landing but pretty safe. You'll be fine. Have a drink before you board to make you feel better.

He could be poor/in school or just out of school/young and just now able to have the means to travel or a shit ton of other reasons

Lol thanks bros. I can only imagine what it's like

I fly about 100k a year..

AMA

also, try and sit over a wing. More comfortable

A finely honed edge...

100k miles?? For work?

How many points you got eh

it's actually like riding a greyhound. except the windows are a lot smaller and the scenery is pretty boring.

a small warning though: turbulence can be rough, especially over the north atlantic. i found that if i thought of it it like a rollercoaster ride it was easier to handle.
you may want to take along a dose or two of gravol, if customs allows.

My first flight was when i was 7 years old and went alone. Flying can be pretty enjoyable, just think of it as time to chill out. Watch a movie or two, listen to music, read, or nap. I'd recommend getting a neck pillow.

>too poor
I get deals to fly for as low as $19 one way. Tons of options for $39-49.
That's "fuck it lets go to cincinatti for the weekend" level of easy.
100$ to experience one of the miracles of the modern age is not a lot by any stretch. That's a pair of shoes or a stupid hat or one week of eating out money.

Don't smoke, it will most likely make you paranoid. Just pregame a bit and bring some small bills for drinks on the plane (they are ~$5-7 per drink) and get nice a comfortable.

Besides, if you crash you won't be walking away from it. Pretty quick and painless death, which is better than most people get

That is correct, over the wing is the aerodynamic center of lift. The most stable point on an aircraft.

...

...

no one goes to Cincinnati for fun

you won't be flying.

the plane will.

i only fly american and yah for work. I ended with a little over 100k american, which I spent. 30k with Delta, thanks to a korea air flight I had to take and the I had to fly PHL from manila to SFO twice. Shitty

Ayyyyyyyy lmao

user is intelligent

Just remember: those bumps are made of air. :-)

CARLOS!!

depends how good of a stoner you are. if you're the kind of guy that can smoke a few bowls and then go to the bar then yea, consider eating a weak edible just before you go through security. if you time it right it wont kick in until you're already at the boarding gate or maybe already on the plane if you eat a huge meal before you drop.

other than that, like said just relax, close your eyes, try to chill during take-off and once it's leveled out order a glass of whisky or a beer or something. Once it's in the air just think of the inside of the plane like the inside of a train. Infact the inside of a plane is pretty much like riding a bullet train.

But dont get drunk on the flight. One beer in the air is worth 2 in the ground cuz of the way altitude works so just drink like 2 and watch episodes of something on your laptop/tablet/phone

actually, this may or may not inspire some confidence.
all those flights.... getting there safely.

flightradar24.com/50.58,-115.46/5

Make sure you clap when you land and tip the pilot.

Thanks man. This is actually really helpful. Motion sickness meds would be good.

And turbulence is what is scarring the fuck out
of me

My cousin was saying last time she flew, they hit turbulence and the plane nose dived for a few seconds

prob just cousin trolling you to be honest
turbulence is usually never more than 5min of sitting down unable to piss because the plane feels like it's on a gravel road

Holy.....shit.....

I would have never guessed

KEK

Used to be the thing to do in the 90s.

Flying fucking rocks.
I love flying so much, it's always an adventure.
If you hate it just take some pills like a bitch.
Flying is the safest form of travel there is.

>i dont like being not in control
that sounds like a you problem you are going to need to get over to get ahead in life user. That WILL hold you back in many different areas of life.
also, the economy is controlled by the federal reserve and your safety is controlled by the government. As a social species we are all inexorable intertwined.

For some odd reason I thought you would be the pilot flying a passenger jet for the first time and thought you were trolling when you suggested weed.

I loved aviation and all, but was terrified to fly. I have a nice flight simulator that I have access to due to wife's dad being a pilot. I loved all of that, but had a fear of flying. So when I flew the first time, I find comfort in getting a window seat, putting on some music, and just looking outside the entire time. It will definitely calm you down seeing how beautiful it is from up there.

>getting this mad about someone leading a different life

easy there, big fella

>the plane nose dived for a few seconds
that did not happen, your cousin is an idiot.

Turbulence is really no big deal at all. At its worst it feels like a wimpy roller coaster, most of the time its like the a vibration in the aircraft. It can just be ignored. Hold on to your beverage a bit.

mad? wut?

if i cant make good natured fun of people to help them grow then whats the point.

Plane flights can be dangerous, so make sure to carry a gun.

And don't let anyone take it from you. There are a couple black gangs who set up checkpoints at airports, dress in this silly fake uniforms, and claim they belong to some made-up agency ("TSA" is popular). But they're really just trying to steal your stuff.

kek

Kek x2

this, I love flying because it's one of the few times that I feel like a boss

>huge fucking marvel of technology flying through the air at 10km altitude at 1000km/h
>in the hands of a highly trained expert
>stewards and stewardesses there to pour drinks, get snacks, make your trip the comfiest
>some flights have onboard wifi (like a local, private netflix server), power outlets
>good airports are usually giant shopping malls with planes attached; so much shit to do while waiting

Just make sure you pick a good seat OP, that's the main thing when flying. near the front or wings is usually good, and if you're tall try to get an aisle seat or one at the bulkheads.

If you get lucky and book a mostly empty flight they let you stretch out and sit whereever once the plane levels out. My first time flying I had a row of 5 seats to myself for 10 hours, with bottomless free alcohol and snacks. shit was great.

>be me
>planning to visit friends stateside
>have friend who has never flown
>take him with
>he's shitting brix. tell him it's ok, I've flown loads
>on the flight, he's terrified but calming down
>suddenly, your standard trans-atlantic turbulence.exe
>I pretend to panic and tell him that's not supposed to happen
Genuinely thought he was going to have a heart attack

stop being retarded

You cunt lol

>Any tips?
Try to get an aisle seat.
Take a fuckin' shower before you go.
Stand up every hour.
Bring some headphones to shut up that annoying cunt you'll be sitting next to.
Everybody farts when cabin pressure gets to 4000ft.
Don't eat the fish.
The plane will go Clunk and Thunk a few times after takeoff and before landing....Relax, this is normal.
Don't worry about the wings flapping in turbulence unless the wing tips are going up and down 10 ft.
Keep your seatbelt on.
It's tradition to yell "Allah Akbar" on takeoff as a prayer for a safe flight.

>Last time I flew
>Was drinking aluminum waterbottle of water
>Go through security
>TSA: "Sir, your waterbottle contains 6 ounces of fluid, 4 is the maximum. We need to confiscate your bottle"
>"How about I just drink 2 ounces right now"
>"Sir if you do that we won't allow you through"

Last time I fucking flew. Fuck the TSA. That was four years ago

yea pretty much this, it feels just like driving on a gravel road, 100%

OP shit that makes flying easier
>moneybelt, keep track of travel documents/tickets/money easier and safer
>tablet/phone with portable charger, filled with movies, .pdf books, manga, whatever you want
>a book
>drink water during the flight
>show up to shit early. Getting to the airport 4 hours early might sound nuts but if you're the first one in line when gate opens you can spend 3 hours drinking in bars, checking out shops or getting some food rather than having to stand in line for an hour or two, impatient and angry that you might miss your flight

#justyankproblems

kek

>keep your sense of humor conservative, if not zipped.

that'll teach ya. not that i wouldn't have done that, too. :-P

I have the exact fear as you for the exact same reason, not sure how bad it is for you but a few years ago i was also diagnosed with severe OCD related problems.

>boston to paris
no, too long of a flight and if it is your first time, you will be very confused at such large airports. I wouldnt recommend smoking first. Just go with 3 hours hours or more and have a few drinks after you find your gate.

And dont be a douchebag to those around you on the plane.

In two weeks I have flights with combine time 15h and I fucking hate flying

I know this is supposed to be funny, but you're not wrong. My aunt's husband is a mexican shitbag who works at the airport and even he talks about "TSA low life niggers stealing out of people's bags". Guess they have a system where the bag handlers and the TSA people steal shit after you hand them your bag and trade it around with other nigs for stuff they want.

Besides, they are just like a gang of government sponsored "Dindu's". How many black TSA agents went to jail when they didn't do their job and let some guy on a plane with a weapon?

why would you want to go to paris?
youtube.com/watch?v=gfFs6EZ4x50

LOLOL TSA is full of retards.

They're the ones that "protect" our borders

>dont be a douchebag to those around you on the plane
This. You have to share a confined space in the sky with a couple hundred other people.

Are you a piolet or a passenger?

I hate flying. Do not drink, you get dried out from flying as it is. Unsure if dope would help or not.

I usually feel like my head is going to explode up to the point when the plane actually takes off, then you're fucking trapped in a pressurized tube for hours on end.

Paris, OTOH, is fantastic and is nearly worth the ordeal of flying. Unbelievable food... especially Chinese food, which surprised me. Best Chinese food I've ever tasted. Even the street food is superlative.

Good luck with the flying thing.

>I'm going to be flying for the first time in March (Boston to Paris) and I'm nervous as fuck
Do you drive in cars? Then flying is safer.

You have nothing to worry about but fear itself.

Naw it doesn't nose dive, you just loose lift for a brief moment and it feels like your falling.
I fly a lot and I fucking hate turbulence. I found if I take motion sickness pills before I can't even be bothered by it. Also, chewing gum helps with your ears on the descent. Oh and drink a lot of water on the plane, the air gets dry as fuck up there. Get a couple of beers on the plane. Even if your under 21, most airlines don't give a shit and just serve you, you just have to be confident.

Just gotta accept your fate, unless there's a highjacker, there's really not much you can do if something were to go wrong.

dont be a pussy, i blazed up with my mate and then my mate dropped me off for a flight from auckland to houston.

just dont be a dumbass and have it on you

Humor only works if there's an element of truth.

Stop beong a little bitch a d get on the plane.
Jesus.

I fly planes and used to fly for an airline and let me tell you there are so many things that can go wrong and the pilots are really lazy

Aerospace Engineering Student here

Just do what I do, OP.

Bring a notebook and draw Bernoulli's principle to all the scared children and adults around you and explain to them what's keeping you 20,000 feet in the air

And then explain that there are certain angles of attack that if the plane were to ascend at, would cause a stall and inevitable crash