Hey faggots, I'm think about joint the military, what branch should I join?

Hey faggots, I'm think about joint the military, what branch should I join?

go coast guard
america needs more cucks

Marines if you want to deal with constant bullshit

chair force
thank me later

Marines. Get yourself killed doing dumb shit like the mindless meatsock you are.

same

also, better looking girls

Chair force?

It is an airforce pun you retarded underaged newfaggot. Because in the airforce you sit in a chair and do dumb ass chores all fucking day.

It's slang for Air Force.
Basically, do nothing and get government monies.

Chair force or Navy

Because OP is a faggot?

Since OPs a fag, Navy for superior cock sucking opportunities

>coast guard
>military

If anything go Air Force, in my country its glorified public service, they don't have as many bullshit """traditions""" because they're relatively new to the scene.

Navy for the food

Hijacking this thread to ask a question!!!!!!
Enlisting an the army soon. My family as a whole has been seeing a family therapist for the last 6 years and I have been diagnosed with RAD and ODD. Should I disclose this information at MEPS. Will they look further into my medical history regardless if I give them a reason to or not.

No.

The job of MEPS is to get you to admit to anything you didn't put on your application that would disqualify you from service.

From what im gathering online is that as long you don't do anything that would make them look further into your medical history they wont waste the time of doing it.

We take delight in sending our officers in to fight.

Exactly, they know only what you tell them

bump

I had to duck walk around the room in my underwear (with a group). Everyone lines up and bends over, with a doc behind you in one in front to see who is in pain.

They're pretty good at seeing who has physical troubles, but I think not so good at detecting mental issues.

former provider, we don't care, if you pass your physical then you get in. If you fuck up and get into trouble then we look harder, if you are discharged for a prior issue that wasn't disclosed, dishonorable no skin off my nose its just your that gets fucked.

in short don't admit to shit, but don't fuck up, the government won't own up to ANYTHING if we can pin it on you and holy shit if we can

kek I remember doing that shit. Yeah you should be fine. There are plenty of retards who got past meps to join. I work with them everyday.

the Decepticons. Have great tech, plus stand for all American values

former coastie here. Seriously, the CG is the best. If you can't get into it try the AF

>There are plenty of retards who got past meps to join. I work with them everyday.

You lose the major retards in boot, basic or recruit training, then follow on training - more tards get invited to leave. Some fuck the part up of making to their first duty station after follow on training so badly, they get invited to GTFO. (they get high, or get drunk and get in jail or other stupid crime)

Things get whittled down. In the AF, if you fail your CDC course at your first duty station after training, you can get kicked out.

There's a lot of ways to make it, and some find all the ways of fucking it up.

Coasties perform navy basic training, right?

Only force to join really

Since you're down with throwing your life away, I'd say join the army. Good way to kill yourself :^)

Let's pro/con each:

Coast Guard/Reserves:
>Get to stay near home and earn easy cash.
>Cuck. All military are cheated upon but for some reason this guys get the cuck cake.

Muhrines:
>Badass, you'll be first in combat zone even if you are POG.
>Department of Navy. Also full of retards, like holy fucking shit how did they even function?

Navy:
>Pretty chill in non-combatant jobs, get to travel and know the world.
>"Lol seamen"

Chairforce:
>There is the joke for a reason. At least you will blow shit up while soaring the skies or making something civilian-transferable.
>If you are not combatant you'll get fat or obese.

Army:
>Mostly chill and more resources than Marines.
>Nearly as much retardation as Marines.

National Reserve:
>Stay in mainland doing jackshit while earning all the benefits.
>Bullshit [Lv_God].

You are more likely to get drown in bullshit in the Department of the Navy and Army than the other branches.

My unit (Marines) constantly has guys fucking up. Whether it be for underage drinking, hazing, drugs or fights with law enforcement out in town. They still manage to stay in. Most just get an NJP. It was the same after boot while in SOI.

>Also full of retards, like holy fucking shit how did they even function

Can confirm it's true. Especially infantry

Aye, they seem pretty tough.

>Chairforce

AF cops have it the worst, IMO.
Flight line ops (maintenance) next worst

Everyone else is pretty beta, except Combat Controllers and PJs, but you don't have to worry about becoming one of the elite.

AF is not that forgiving. They send 'em home, and thank them for playing.

So, they didn't got their ass handed to them or got gutted alive like a fish by their SO when they fucked up?

This explains a lot actually.

I saw a lot of soldiers in Korea that did shit over and over that would get Airmen kicked out.

AF has people lined up at the door to get in, so keeping fuckups in is not in it's best interest.

>it's best interest.
its best interest.

Air force: it has the coolest logo

I was going to say that.

Air force - go medical if you want hot girls. Go comm if you want easy job, go CE if you wanna fix my AC. Go maintainer if you want to deal with long hours of fixing jets. Go security forces if you wanna scan IDs at the gate for the first 4 years of your career.

Join the Navy, and get get a real job that you can use in the civilian world. Join the air Force, and have the best of everything. Air Force life is nirvana. Marines.. you get treated like absolute shit for your service. If you join the army, get a job that you can apply to the real world. Whatever you decide to join, get a job skill that you can use in the real world.

Do you need to have taken college to go to medical?

lol, who told you marines are first in the combat zone.. because you aren't. fucktard.

Everyone knows that SF go in first. Then Marines and Army.

you just blow in from stupid town, faggot

Fuck them all.
Join the French Foreign Legion

>i'm think about join the military
Marine Corps, you fucking moron.

>they know only what you tell them
KEKEKEKEKEKEKEKEKEKEKEK

Yeah, only a moron would join marines.

...

I know this isn't a reckt thread, but my only advice would be that you avoid being in a platoon with women, at all.

Don't be a fucking POG

Whichever you join (don't join Marines), don't fucking quit in Basic.

NSA

Just kill yourself, thats the best branch to join cause modern US military is a joke.

Doesn't matter. Practically the same shit in essence, unless you plan on deploying to a combat zone. If you're in speculation mode and expect to see combat, you're a fucking retard and should avoid the military; stick to CoD.

If you have little direction in life and need some sort of boost, take a military job shuffling papers or being a counselor or some shit. Get the same basic training for all of your "omg I gotta run through mud in full gear" and puts your square (in a combative way) with most other jobs, and allows you to avoid getting shot at, which is smart.

Marines are all riflemen, so expect deployment in a conflict if shit gets heated.

Army's flooded, go there. They have a massive infantry to protect you from having to get shot at.


TL:DR Don't go combat and reap the same benefits with none of the drawbacks.

I'm this guy.

Also, if you just want to help the world or see action or whatever, go to a federal law enforcement agency and get a job. Secret service, DEA, etc.

Get the cushy perks and none of the AK-47-fire your way

Seconded. Best way to die gloriously.

Are you a tard? Join the Army.
Are you a tard with tard strength? Join the Marines.
Are you a pussy? Join the Air Force.
Are you a faggot? Join the Navy.
Are you a faggot AND a pussy? Join the Coast Guard.

MEPS has hundreds of people going in per week. You're just another face that they see for a day so as long as you don't act completely retarded they won't look into it at all.

Anyone else take the DLAB test at MEPS that shit was a fucking headache

They do have access to your medica records the second you sign the form that authorizes them to do so... but lol no they won't go through your medical records unless you give them a reason to..

Remember, No, No and No. Too many people to go in, I spent the entire day from 4AM to 6PM at meps, trust me, they don't have time to look into your medical records unless you tell them something you didn't tell them the first time.

Ever been to the hospital for anything? No.
Every taken painkillers for a headache? No.

The people's job at meps is to do what ever they can to prevent you from joining the military. And trust me, it won't be fun coming back a 3rd time.

Vive la Legion Etrangere!