The kids in my neighbourhood are always waving at my wife. Some of the older kids even blow her kisses on occasion. She even got a love letter last Valentine's Day from the teenager across the road. I told him it was inappropriate.
Anyway, over the last two months they have been stealing her underwear from the clothesline. The same kid from across the road gave me the finger and told me they smelled like flowers.
I got the shits and told his parents.
When my wife isn't home I like to masturbate. Fine. Whatever. Everyone does. Still, I like to use a dildo like the related image to get anal pleasure.
After finishing, I washed it and put it on my back porch to dry. It should have been safe there.
That fucking kid from across the road stole it. I was looking for it, not wanting to look obvious, when the kid called out to me from his front yard. He gave me the finger and started sucking on it. He told me that my wife's pussy smelled like flowers.
What do I do? Do I try and get it back? If his parents find it, what will he say? Do I tell my wife? Do I just deny everything?
Brody Brooks
lol
Julian Kelly
Just tell the kids straight to their face that its been in your ass. Probably freak them out and then just tell wife and parents you did it as a joke.
Jordan Harris
It's not fucking funny.
Nathan Cook
The kid with the dildo isn't exactly old enough to have a dildo.
Mason Edwards
It is
Liam Jackson
Bad bait, why would you ever "dry" a dildo outside, it's fucking rubber.
Matthew Perez
No, mine is an expensive polymer.
It specifically states to sun dry after washing.
Alexander Johnson
Fuck your wife up against an open window, in clear view of the child.
Parker Jenkins
...
Nolan Morales
It's funny tho.
Adrian Watson
>windows and the fact that you're getting cucked by kids instead of acting like an actual adult really secures the bait
Isaac Cox
How did they even get to the dildo what the fuck
Jacob Hill
then why does he have a dildo
Lucas Cox
The little pricks have been into my yard. They stole my wife's underwear.
Caleb Barnes
He stole my fucking dildo because he thought it belongs to my wife!
Brayden Barnes
You got cucked by kids. They're black aren't they? Yep. They own your wife now.
Zachary Martin
nu-male problems man. you wanted to be a cuck now youre getting cucked. anyways I would tell the kid it was your dildo.
Andrew Richardson
Can I get arrested?
Asher Hill
lol no.
Liam Robinson
dont think so. kid stole your property after all.
Bentley Evans
Get the taco shit and shit in some panties and leave them out.
Parker Fisher
Do you have video of you using it?
Jonathan Wright
I think the only reason you're not laughing is because this didn't happen.
Juan Garcia
I thought of doing something like that, but she hen I'll be a criminal.
Still, I hate that little bastard.
He likes 3Doors Down, too. Did I mention that? Always in that stupid shirt.
Carter Gomez
Wake up.
The world is different to your dick. Things actually happen in the world.
