I've had a terrible day today Sup Forums... What about you guys...

I've had a terrible day today Sup Forums... What about you guys? Can you tell me how bad your day has been maybe we can feel better about ourselves

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what's your plan for tomorow?

Going to help my dad find a phone, he doesn't like touch screen ones and took the last one back. I'm also going to fit a wing mirror on his car so it can pass the MOT.

Other than that, I'll probably do nothing.. you?

living the neet nightmare, fighting the existential crisis on a daily basis, can't get or keep a job, all this time at my hands is driving me crazy. the anxiety is getting so bad i see malice in every person i meet outside. took a long walk today and whenever passing by a person i got that feeling you get when you fall and feel the ground rushing up towards you. thought about anhero for a bit, went shopping, fapped and that'll be it for tonight

Losing one close friend for nothing.. We phoned everyday for like hour, 4 months straight. It hurts. It fucking hurts.

what do you mean for nothing? did he die?

probably gonna work for school, nothing too intresting but it will keep me busy for the whole day, then i'll enjoy my evening with my roommates

She. And no. I don't know man, suddenly she started to act cold and getting mad by every little shit I say. It's hard to describe. Maybe it's because she fell in love with one guy and stopped give an attention to most of her friends or idk.. Either way it hurts :/

i have no plans for tomorrow

i had a bad day as well. nothing really special but i just felt nothing the entire day. i miss the days where i at least felt sad.

she has used you for free attention. you were here beta orbiter. she used you because you were an easy way to get some attention. i bet you complimented her frequently when you still spoke.

having a little something to do, even if it's not something you'd consider really productive is a good way to pass the day and feel better.
It can even be something like cleaning up the house or 30mins of excercise. at the end of the day you feel like accomplishing something good for yourself

Not really.. Funny thing is that it used to be other way - she wanted me, but I had been short after break up with ex. Then she slightly lowered her attention, but we still managed to get laid together and make out every time we met.. It was like friends with benefits.

arent you overeacting saying you lost a friend? your guys still talk to eachother right? maybe she can explain what's going on

We don't talk/write anymore, like for week.. I know, it sounds like beta overreacting, but when you hear someone everyday for months, you get a little bit attached.

Trying to figure out how I can make ends meet with $1000 less a month. Not going to be pretty.

of course, sorry that happened to you... did the relationship changed when you two got laid?

I woke up 4 days ago with terrible joint and muscle pain all throughout my body. Went to the ER and found out I am having an adverse reaction to zoloft. When I woke up this morning I was trying to get comfy and play some vidya to take my mind off of the pain and shit the bed when I trusted a fart. My room smells like sick old person now.

I fear a little bit.. One should see that cuming tho

>dropped gf off to school
>slept for 3 more hours
>came here to shitpost
>pick up gf later and go to sushi as we always do
>walk around the mall and get samples
>come home
>be with gf
>she goes to sleep then I shitpost here a bit more

Thats about it.

yeah i guess the got mad that you didnt see her as a gf but just as girl you used to get laid..

>mid twenties alcoholic
>wake up. long distance relationship. quickly tell her i'm going to shower then hang up.
>puke into trash
>fucking blizzard. i shovel out a car or walk half a mile for liqour.
>chose to walk. slipped once but caught my balance. almost get hit by kid on quad and a jeep.
>neetbucks spent on booze again
>go home to drink myself retarded
>shovel walkway to street.
>told to shovel out older sisters car
>i have a flight in two days. she won't drive me. i'm splitting 160 with GF for a shuttle.
>tell mom since she can't drive me i'm not selling her an 80$ shoveling job.
>moonwalk up to my room and keep drinking.
>mother still raging. will for two days straight.
least i have neetbucks. other than that i workout, game, watch stuff and fap.

i started cutting again. went to therapy the next day as i do twice a week every week. He says i need to start setting goals

how does one acquire these neetbucks. is it through ssid or something?

i am i used to cut and burn. it actually feels really good and i didn't want to stop but i did. started to hit things instead. working out and getting high helps. i miss that numbing feeling and rush of calm.

yeah im way too lazy to work out. im losing weight through not eating though, should make me feel a bit better about myself. weed helps more than anything else. It just gets expensive when you dont have a job

ok here we go.
i'll be typing a somewhat lengthy response after my next drink

I got diagnosed with Von Hippie-Lindau disease 2 days ago. On the bright side, I will know what cancers to screen for. On the down side it means that my kidney and adrenal cancer (losing one of each next week) at age 29 were not a fluke, they will be back, amongst other cancers. I caught them early, so there's some good news.

holy fuck 80$ shoveling job at your MOM'S house
just kill yourself

some parents care too much and it makes things hard

ok so my #1 advice is to get a case worker or a social worker to help you. these people were angels to me. i've seen shrinks off and on for years. so a decade later i finally got ssi.
thing is i was trying for over 5 years to get on after graduating.
you'll need to apply for disability then they'll tell you to see their own doctors for evaluations. i saw the same guy a few times and the first time i sobbed he told me "you'll probably get on." and that was bullshit.
this is all because i mind-broke after a breakup, a death, and addiction. i started cutting. i admitted myself to a psych ward to try and get clean and safe. met a convict who told me he gets neetbucks just because he's in counseling and has mental issues. i run with this.
i went dark for a year because mind-break. return to the internet and get long distance relationship. 2 years ago i become an impotent alcoholic and get a kickass caseworker. i go back into the shrink and psychiatry scene. i'm honest. i'm a cutter, a burner, a drinker, an opiate abuser, i hit things in fits of rage, i black out, XYZ happened to me and i can't sleep.
2 years later i'm at a court hearing for disability. i had a panic attack and cried in court. told them how they kicked me out of that hospital for lack of insurance which is true. the shrink they have sitting in the court room lists off like 20 fucking conditions.
neetbucks aquired.
when you go to a shrink everything is put into a database. remember that. it all came up and they shit at the reports.
i'm still in counseling and i'm trying to recover from being an alcoholic.
i'm not proud, but i got help, and any help helps. help help. i'm less anxious and paranoid these days.

yeah it was just a small patch of snow a toddler could clean off and i did it out of spite.
i've been landscaping two of her properties for years without getting paid because i have a roof over my head.
i can't complain but i'll get in my spite when i can.
and i already attempted suicide with a shit ton of pills but it didn't work. then i realized something. fuck everyone and everything.

>checked
I see now. I've been to 14 therapists and is only 19. I haven't been abe to hold down a job or even get one. pretty sure i have mild sociopathy and some kind of major depressive/obsessive disorder

bump

many caseworkers told me it helps to get a job and and if you happen to fail at it that's a clear sign you're kind of mentally disabled. thing is it's hard for me to get a job.
coincidentally i got one through a family friend and he busted my ass there because my sister probably trashed me first and he's a dickhead ex-convict anyway. he wanted my to lift things over 200 pounds to break up and throw in the trash. he wanted me to cry. i had two days on the job and broke up both days. people saw me crying. i told him i couldn't do it and just quit myself.
that was on the record.
also he laughed when i told him i couldn't do it while saying "i knew it"
i went rage and said "WHAT?"
"i just meant i thought you couldn't do it. i gave you a shot and you did your best."
he wanted me to stay for the day but i just grabbed my shit and left. i wanted to hit him with that truck but i also really wanted the job. i can pick locks and he was going to bring me to storage auctions to open locked things and drive cars back to his place. i'd be making more than neetbucks now if i didn't fuck that up.
that was all on the record.
stick with counseling. try to get a job. make your court appeals.

i would've stayed there but i have back issues so that was the deciding factor.
i've seen the reports myself and have been told that mental disorders aren't typically taken seriously until after the age of 20. you might have a few years to go before you get approved. stay in the ring.

As a person with a history of severe depressions and drug abuse, this picture pretty much sums up my life.

i havent gotten to the point where court is involved yet. I havent really tried to get money from it as im still living with my mom. I think that it might be that i live in an area with very low population and a very acute culture

feel that way all the time

The girl I'm in love with posted lewd pics of herself in my friends bed. I told her we can't be friends anymore. We weren't on good terms anyway and we were hoping to patch things up. That was the last straw. And now she's taking it all out on me, calling me a pussy, telling me she regrets wasting her time on me and shit like that.

...

why on your friends bed?

Because they've been hooking up a lot recently. And she likes taking lewds and nudes of herself.

did she send them to you to make you mad or something? it doesnt seem like someone would slip up that bad unless it was on purpose and she just wanted to make you mad

youtube.com/watch?v=5FjWe31S_0g
you better rip that bandaid off before you're in a three year relationship like me knowing she had a fucking threesome at the back of your mind.

>my life doesn't matter but i want it to boohoo
get over it pussy and watch cartoons. if meaning in your life is so damn important go do charity work you spoiled bitch

Get into pokemon go.

Probablygot fed up with your shit

Scum
Hold a fucking job. 95% of people dread going to work. Thats why its called fucking work.

>be me, virgin
>enter DatGurrl
>something tells me she badly wants the D
>but only intends to fuck to take advantage of the dude
>basically a whore with near-zero mileage
>and I don't want to make her think I'm gonna pay for sex
>asks me to hang around
>we hang around, I even bought her an icecream
>she's ok with it
>few days later asks me to hang around
>wants to go to the cinema
>would have been a shitty movie btw
>told her it's better eating something at McDo
>she's triple ok because eating is always better than a cringey movie
>me pays for both
>few days later she wants a date
>me tries to figure out how much it would cost
>pay for her dinner
>go out to watch stars
>we're in front of a church, below us there's a beach
>she wants a kiss
>jokingly told her the priest would open the window and shout at us
>we go to the beach
>while walking she grabs my hand
>me understands it's kiss time
>me is also scared: what if sex happens? how much dollars?
>"watch your step, that's a dog turd"
>she approaches me
>"watch your step, that's another dog turd"
>she seems to be going to kiss me
>me hopes it would only end with a kiss without sex
>our mouths barely two inch apart
>but she whispers: "we're a couple now, don't we?"
>me says "yes", expecting that First Kiss
>she starts instead a bizarre talk about us
>what I had to do, what never had to do, basically a sermon
>basically I have to pay for everyone of her whims
>I have to worship her parents, to enter the same college she'll choose, to stay away from any other girl, and so on
>me feels more and more depressed
>her sermon ends asking: "are you ok with everything?"
>and while she says it she gets again very close to me
>silence.mp3
>I'm not ok with all that stuff, I've a number of objections
>"nope"
>she's surprised and backpedals
>"then we cannot date anymore", she says
>I try to rationalize but she doesn't want to talk anymore
>few minutes later I got her last words "bye bye"
>and since then she didn't talk to me anymore

So you were like a backup bf and now you can't see why, after getting a real bf, that you are no longer needed?

Retard

Nope she posted it on one of her social medias. Like you could also see him in the background and she deleted soon after and posted others nudes. A few weeks ago before we stopped being friends, she was flirting with him hard right in front of me and spending all of her time with him. I just wanted her for myself and she doesnt feel the same. Yeah i feel like i kinda overreacted but things were already fucked up and i would just continue to keep hurting myself if stay. We used have to a thing but now that's just a distant memory.

>be me
>wake up early for work
>can barely get up off the couch i've been sleeping on for two years to get dressed
>step over piles of dirty clothes, trash and random debris
>get my shit and leave
>freezing wind almost knocks me over on the way inside to work
>sit down at desk
>feel random pain start in my body for no apparent reason
>i have some sort of nerve disorder, cant afford to go to the doctor to see what or get any meds
>stabbing pain in my left foot on and off all day, so bad it sometimes makes me lightheaded
>try to ignore it and continue
>it happens again, sharper this time
>contemplate suicide
>ask myself what i'm waiting for, its not like my life is going to get any better
>stand up at end of shift, my leg is out of the socket again
>make yelping sound in pain before i can catch myself
>feel embarrassed but relieved that no one heard it
>leave work and buy alcohol
>come home and change back into pajamas
>lay on the couch and drink
>i plan to say drunk the entire weekend so i dont feel all of the pain in my body

theres not even any point in crying anymore

My day.
>Woke up 07:40, hangover/drunk.
>Spent 15 minutes throwing up.
>Showered, got dressed and walked to the pizzeria around the corner and had breakfast.
>Walked 3km into town, got my self a bottle of vodka (1 liter Dworek, I'm poor) and drank about a third on the walk home.
>Got home, already drunk, opened a six pack from the fridge.
>Start computer, tv and stereo.
>Been drinking, listening to music, browsing the web and jacking off since then. It's now 21:42 at night..
>Same tomorrow most likely.

oh ok i can see now. yeah you should cut ties inb4 she claims to be "Polyamourous"

I'm trying too. She's not taking it well at all. At first she was insulting me telling me she regrets meeting me. Nows she's getting emotional telling me that she cares about me, shes poured her heart out to me and all this. This has been going on for weeks but just now I finally decided to tell her we shouldn't be friends.

I want this life

Simple, move to northern Europe (Scandinavia) live of social aid, get a diagnosis from a shrink that you have aspergers and live the rest of your life doing nothing.
Worked for me.

this is my life with except with weed. not the greatest

THIS
she was a tumblr polyamorous sjw and i had to get her to shut her shit down before we had a serious relationship. now she has no social accounts to my knowledge. still don't trust her but i'm willing to tie the knot. i post her on Sup Forums sometimes anyway for fun and she knows it.

Just closed the last chance about keeping a firendship with my last Ex. Didn't go like I wanted, but it went like I knew it would go. Disspointed.

So. . .what's up? I can dump fluffy abuse shit if someone wants to cheer up.

Fuck your dindu shit.
>muh depression
>I need muh alcohols
I hate my fucking life too and drink every night until I blackout, but I still go to work so I don't have to be a drain on society. This is fucking dindu mentality and my taxes are paying for your sad exist nice cuz
>muh sad

polyamourous does have an upside, though. she should let you fuck other girls. Still, though its no fun if you cant. Even then you don't get the feeling that shes all to yourself

Lately I've been awake until late in the morning and sleeping during the day. In addition, nobody gave me a job recently in which I could put my knowledge into practice and right now all my skills are rusting. Anyway, the most usual job conditions where I live are basically hiring you for X hours and making you work X+n (unpaid and unwillingly), among many other things.

So right now I'm considering if moving to another country and spending all the money I have in order to look for a job there would make a difference, or perhaps it'd be better to do nothing and let the depression deepen.

ive been getting that thing where i freak out seeing people on the street and try to avoid them. its just cause you get used to being alone. try exposing yourself to people in small ways more and that gets a little better i find

noice trips

yeah same thing happens to me. it just feels like nobody wants to see me out there.

you're a slave and you'll never accomplish anything. far more of your taxes are going towards building tanks and jets than towards keeping your fellow citizens psychologically healthy

I got a bad grade in a paper that counts as double on my GPA. Please tell me that I'm not gonna fail school, because it really shook my confidence

Not him but
>I'm the same as you but I also work
>YEAH WELL SHEEP

Thanks!
Finally... I'm on the fast-track to success!

>work has inherent value and is not a means to an end
sure thing commie

Don't forget to stink of alcohol on every meeting as well. Get's you to my level in no time.
If you are lucky they even get you a nice apartment!

ive dropped out of school a couple times now and all of my friends have done the same. go back when your ready to deal with it. its my only advice

my problem is i dont know where to look when i see a person walking towards me and then i start to panic and feel like they can tell

mfw i'm on the neetbucks train and that motherfucker pays for my alcohol while i share lunch with my cat.

for the past year i didnt think about how i dont have any friends or love in my life because i could just drink everyday after work and browse on my pc. but i got really sick from drinking like two months ago and now everytime i try to have even a few beers my heart races like crazy. anyone else have this problem? i know drinking isnt a solution but i at least felt good some of the time. now i feel like an empty shell and think about anhero alot

>commie
As if you could be true commie nowadays lol

Anyway, either you like it or not, society nowadays is built over having money to not die in the fucking street unless you go full hobo.

If you try to fight that you would come up doing double the effort, so sure, you can be unenmployed but you will end up working more.

yeah making eye contact is hard for me but alot of people find it necessary. idk ive never really tried it, especially not with girls.

No shit I'm a slave. Welcome to life. At least I'm not a nigger draining society. At least I can still take pride in what I accomplish.

i know, exposure is the only thing that works against anxiety. i've been going through this in cycles now for 10 years (i'm 27yrs now) and i know that i'm intelligent and capable enough to cope with basic shit, i love people and am skilled at interacting with them. but then out of the blue i plummet into anxiety and depression again and turn into a mumbling idiot shut in trying to escape from everything. i've done just about every form of therapy to break the cycle, ultimately to no avail

its better when i have my dog with me then i can just look at him while the person walks by. he never feels awkward as far as i can tell

it just feels like it takes a constant effort to be normal and sociable and i always end up falling apart and yeah like you said trying to escape. smoking weed for years certainly didnt help that either

Just start looking at people as weird immature grown up children. It may take time, but can really work. I don't even seem people as adults anymore just a dumb animal stuck in their own existence. Which in the end is all we really are.

samefag here
i was trolling just now but honestly thanks for doing what i'm not. it's because of people like you that i don't kill myself.
youtube.com/watch?v=5cHOc5t6yaE

And how many neetbucks does a neetdindu receive per month? I can rest easy knowing I have hella more than any neetdindu.

i do the same kind of thing unintentionally. i usually look at people with my chin held high. i cant help to think that it might be some kind of hidden superiority complex or something.

thanks for the tunes. i thought it was a clip from the show arrested development for a second didnt realize there was an artist by the name too

no shit, you work because you get hungry not because it turns drones into the heroes of their own stories

This.

Whatever happened to the idea that if one doesn't work, one doesn't eat?

right now a little over 500$ a month which is less than a full time minimum wage job.
just enough to support my habits and see my gf.
yes you make more money than me and i'm jelly. at least i have my afternoons and can stay up late. i mean have fun with your retirement.

it's weird for me since i haven't talked about it in a while and find myself bawing on Sup Forums once again, but i can't get that shitmonkey that is my past off my back. i've tried to explain to my shrinks that being raped as a kid and being infused with pornography instead of normal intimacy (which hence on scared the living shit out of me) early on fucked me up big time, but they wouldn't have any of that. psychoanalysis is dead, behavioural therapy is now they said (paraphrased) so we wouldn't even mention it. quite a shitty burden you have to carry around with almost 30, failed university, job training, neet, got fat, never had a relationship. everywhere i turn i'm hopelessly behind and the shame is just so crippling. at times it takes all my willpower to go out the door, which is what faggots saying "get it together, i'm sad and hate my life too and i manage" don't understand. being depressed at times is part of the spectrum of human emotion and absolutely healthy, but a chronic depression, anxiety, or whatever else is far far beyond anything you can understand if you don't have it. i know it's pathetic, i know i'm a leech on society and even worse my family and i fight it with all my might, but the underbelly of shit won't give up on me so easily

If I even live to retirement.

yeah i found that tune recently. i'm on neetbucks but i swear i keep singles in my pocket all the time so i can hand out money to anybody who asks for it. i don't care about money. i wish i had more of it but i'd just give it to others.
youtube.com/watch?v=YUUhDoCx8zc

same here with all

neetbucks here.
think of your family. keep moving on.
i almost shot myself the other day then realized there are about a handful of people who would suffer more with my loss.
you don't need another person to be happy. you don't need to be rich to be happy. you need see your problems within.
just feel rest assured that it doesn't get any better. and i hope you can all be happy for at least a day in our miserable lives.
youtube.com/watch?v=a01QQZyl-_I

i really get down on myself and hate all my fuck ups but i do believe strongly in being as good to other people as i can. feels good man. even if they dont always appreciate it

yeah i won't off myself for exactly that reason. and the struggle i've already put in. after all i guess i can be proud of something, slimmed down a bit, stopped smoking and don't drink or do drugs.

sorry to hear that m8
care to elaborate?

neetbucks.
yeah i only care about others lately. anhedonia. greater good. if i have a roof and hot water and ramen it's ok. i would be ok with taking a bullet for someone else. when i was a teen i'd spend time with the homeless and eat lunch with them. best advice i ever had from them was when a guy asked for my last cigarette. he tells me "don't do crack".
shit was profound.
i actually just remembered my favorite bro from that time. we called him beanie-man for his iconic hat. his street name was jugo (juice).
i was about 12.9 and keeping him out of street fights and drank with him. hit and run. they never caught the driver. he has no insurance and died at the E.R.
youtube.com/watch?v=v0dUnoecoZ0

Thanks neetbucks, you're right. I was just joking at the thought that be one of those unlucky bastards who dies suddenly a year or two before retirement