What's that word for when you realise that you'll look back at the previous year and three quarters and realise it was...

What's that word for when you realise that you'll look back at the previous year and three quarters and realise it was completely wasted?

>finished a degree I hated
>worked retailcuck part time jobs
>barely read more than 5 books
>did maybe a month's worth of productive stuff in my free time
>went to the gym regularly and lifts went up but ate lots of junk food and had coffee enough to harm sleep at times
>main hobby is taking walks or driving and feeling sad about my life and telling myself I will work extremely hard to learn productive skills tomorrow
>wasted gigantic amounts of time on internet and Sup Forums browsing
>told myself every day that I'd start working hard and eating healthily tomorrow and having genuine false hope almost every time

I can't motivate myself to work hard on anything or have goals. I know other people have quarter life crises but my life is fucking zooming past, not due to a boring 9-5 job but my inability to do anything with my free time.

I am a Stirnerite that knows deep down that all advice is trivial and worthless.

I hate that there are ten trillion topics considered important and that there is always someone willing to call you a retard if you don't know it. I fully realise that it's all social signalling nonsense. Yet it still weighs on me. There's always someone willing to say you only need to work hard if you're stupid. Or you're stupid not to work hard. Or that procrastination is great- or not. Or anything.

I feel like everything is so trivial it's not worth doing or extremely frustrating and out of my reach.

I see successful people and almost all of them just got in to the right institutions and took the elevator up with tonnes of support. I go to graduate assessment days and am surrounded by normie clones who are interviewed by their normie clones. I have almost no chance. And these are interviews for "respected" jobs that usually do pointless things.

Bump

*slow claps*

Help normie

Do you want money?

Do you think you can outperform the normies?

Literally just be yourself lmao

It's clearly not working to be myself, Norman.

Sounds like depression. Apathy, low energy and no drive usually are. What did you do your degree in? I'm sure you can find a decent job.

If you're only here to mock me just say so. I never chose to have low testosterone.

Just start eating healthy and working out tomorrow, you'll notice a difference within a week trust me on that. Avoid this website entirely, I honestly recommend reddit as an alternative. You don't have to become a normie, only seem like one. In your mind, you'll always be superior to the normies - so you can easily outperform them.

I don't know, i just know my life is complete shit since my 10 years old.

i feel you bro

I already exercise. I have an eye problem that's been causing me a lot of pain for a month and it's really red. And I keep delaying to see a doctor about i t and now I'm scared to go.

What is the best to check out a fucked up eye

Post pic

It's probably just an infection that's easily treatable. Just go to a walk in clinic or a family doc or an optometrist.

It's not an infection. It's severe pain for a month. I'm considering going to the hospital for it. I don't even know if optometrists are qualified to diagnose this.

Phone camera is fucked I can't

get it checked out then, it'll worsen if you don't lmao

I'm worried I let it worsen too much now.

Become a Buddhist and realise that you've been been living a lie

Just be yourself :^)

You don't have to be good at everything.
Just focus on something you like and git gud.
Also nice blog.

Sup Forums should be considered your blogging platform at this point.
Even though I can realte to you in most of your statements your posts are amusing.
Keep'em comin'.